He is going places.

We can't have nice things after all.
Tag anyone you know who is using it.

On the last working day of our CEO.
CEO: As a software company, if we are to build an airplane would you ride on the airplane that we built?
Everyone was silent.
Me at the back of my head: I'll ride. I know for sure that the airplane will never start.

*alright,let's go to bed now*
*finally in bed and about to sleep*

*figured bug out in head*
*gets out of bed, fixes the bug*
*gets back into bed*
.
.
.
*heeeey wait, if I do it like this.... *
*gets out to fix second bug*
*back to bed*
.
.
*Hoooold on... *fixes third bug while laying in bed**

*really has to go to bed now 😩*

Me: *staring at computer screen, not looking busy*

Boss: Why are you not working?

Me: I am, I'm just waiting for this thing to finish installing.

Boss: You do realize you can still do other stuff while that's running, right?

Me: Didn't you send me an article last week about the dangers of multitasking?

Boss: um...

Me: *now intently staring at progress bar..."

Boss: fuck sakes... *walks away*

Too much stupid today..

Client: "Our server is almost full, fix it"

Me: "Okay, you can upgrade the VM, or I can see if theres anything that can be cleaned up?"

C: "Clean it up"

Me: *Finds 5 extra MySQL DB's that amount to 50-60GB in total*

Me: "Well I can remove some of your extra databases, and some of the local backups, as they're also backed up offsite. They're currently unused and dated back to the beginning of 2017, everything is out of date anyways."

C: "No"

Me: "Okay, is there a reason?"

C: "No"

Me: "Okay, so we'll upgrade the VM?"

C: "No"

Me: "I'm sorry, but those are really your two options"

C: "Just fix it"
...................
...................
...................
What in the ducking fuck !@#$#%?
If you're so fuggin smart, then why do they pay me?
I'm clearly stupid and unable to read your mind.

Professor: "Who here regularly backs up all their data?"
*Some people raise their hands*
Professor: "Who has at some point lost their data?"
*The exact same people raise their hands*

ironic

Church proyect...

Client: we want our logo in our new website

Me: ok no problem just give me the....

Client: but we dont want ppl to be able to download it.

Me: excuse me but that is not posible cuz...

Client: where is your faith! Nothing is imposible.

Me: proceed to stare in disbelief....

aaaaaand I did it again:

if( !txt.getText().length() != 0 ){

}

I'm done for today

Ctrl + W allows to select the word, then the sentence, around your cursor inside a JetBrains software.

Ctrl + W allows you to FUCKING close the current tab in any FUCKING web browser

I bet everyone here knows these two situations:

1. You have a bug, show the code to somebody else for debugging and the bug is gone, but as soon as you're alone again, it reappears.
2. Your program works fine, you want to show somebody what you accomplished and...
IndexOutOfBoundsException: The index was outside the bounds of the array.

Workflow?
No source control. No documentation. No testing. Do everything on live server.

I love programming.. I really do.. But sometimes bugs drive me crazy... Long story short.. I'm getting a new laptop don't ask what happened to the other one

You know what's worse than hell?

Your non-technical boss thinking he knows coding.

In the middle of night you are going to fix the problem he created, because he messed it in live server.

(Udacity)

Beware with LostPass: A tool to phish LastPass accounts.

Surprisingly it is an opensource project with 322 stars.

I think I am tired.

I almost did a switch-case on a boolean.

No, thank you, you nice little app. If you wanted to call someone to find out the weather, I think I can do it myself.

Made my day 😂😂

- How can we make sure the age input is an integer?
- Let's add some incremental buttons for edit it.
- Nice, sounds pretty safe and convenient

Me after 13 hours of coding yesterday...

I think it's time to stop and go to sleep....

I'm 22 and professional COBOL developer working for a bank, would love to move but money is good.

> *makes literally one change in the code*
> welp! Calling that a day!
> *proceeds to play GTA Online*

function getOld (age) {
return age++
}

I’m legally not allowed to rant about my company but im gonna do it anyway so stay put

Gotta love the permanent temporary solutions.

Me: *Opens GitHub issue*

Maintainer: "it's a known issue"

# issue closed

Wife: the neighbors brought their pc, it doesn't work.

Me: WTF did I say to you. I DON'T REPAIR ANYTHING NO PCS, PRINTERS, WASHMACHINES NOTHING TELL THEM TO GET THE FUCKING PC GODDAMIT ITS MY FREE DAY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

When your code merges with your coworker's code without any conflicts