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Anyone else used Stack Overflow for many years without ever asking or answering a single question?20
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Me: "I'm a programmer"
Others: talks about linux
Others: search algorithms!
Others: service infrastructure
Others: memory optimization
Others: encryption
Me: "I'm a front end web developer"
Others: complex services
Others: strong user form validation
Others: lazy loading
Others: SEO
Me: "fucking, I make shit look pretty alright"11 -
I. FUCKING. HATE. MOBILE. DEVELOPMENT.
I already manage the data, devops, infra, and most of the backend dev.
We had a mobile guy. He was great. I never had to think about it and kept moving quickly on my work. #SpecializationOfLaborFTW
He left. Why? Because they wouldn't give him a small raise despite being one of the best mobile engineers in the firm. WTF.
I made the mistake of picking up just enough slack on this workflow in the interim such that I'm, apparently, the fucking god-damned release manager, fixer of pipelines, fixer of build configs, fixer of anything where someone just needs to RTFM for a half-hour to not fucking break things.
Now, 8 months later...and, apparently, Fortune 500 companies are too fucking god-damned cheap to pay for someone who actually knows WTF they're doing for a very reasonable thing to have at least one dedicated set of eyes for.
I never wanted to be a mobile dev.
I never will want to be a mobile dev.
And I certainly don't want to manage your HALF-FACE-FUCKED detached expo configs.
There's a reason I never intentionally involved myself in mobile. All the way down, it's just shitty cross-compilation, transpilation, dependency-hell, brittle-as-fuck build processes so we can foot-gun and mouth-gun react-native and expo and babel and whatever the fuck else cargo-culted horseshit into the wild.
And why? What's the actual fucking root cause? The biggest white elephant that ever fucking elephant-ed? It's because Apple and Google decided to never collaborate on a truly-native cross-platform SDK--where engineers could write native code that compiles to native binaries that's simply write-once, run-everywhere. They know they could have done that, and they didn't. So what'd they get back? Expo--a too-cleverly-designed backdoor/hack--more-or-less a way to circumvent the sane release process software has usually followed: code -> executable -> deploy. Or code -> deploy (for interpreted langs). Expo's like "keep your same executable, we're just gonna to do updates by injecting new code into it whenever we want". Didn't we learn anything with web? Shit gets messy real quick? Not to mention: HEY EXPO, WE WERE ALREADY BUILDING NATIVE APPS, YOU SHORT-SIGHTED FUCKS. THANKS FOR LURING OUR CTOs INTO FORCING EXPO DOWN OUR THROATS W/ THE IMPLICIT (BUT INCORRECT) TOO-GOOD-TO-BE-TRUE PROMISE THAT WE CAN HAVE WRITE-ONCE, RUN-ANYWHERE WITHOUT ANY BUY-IN OR COOPERATION FROM THE ACTUAL TARGET PLATFORMS.
And, we just, like, accept this? We all know it's garbage engineering. The principles we learned in the classroom aren't just academic abstractions--they actually yield real-world results--and eschewing them yields real-world failures. Expo is tightly-coupled to high-heaven, with leaky abstractions six-ways-to-christmas, chock-full of foot-guns, and fails the most basic test of quality: does it, "just work?"
Expo is fucking shameful and it should fucking die. Its promises are too bold, its land-mines too many, its future-proof-ness is alway, always, always questionable as fuck and a risk to every project that uses it.
You want a rant? This is my fucking venue, 'tis not? Well, then this is a piss and vinegar rant straight from my blood-red, beating fucking heart:
EXPO FUCKING SUCKS. AND IF YOU'RE A FAN, YOU FUCKING SUCK TOO.23 -
It's hard to use Google Voice when you're a bilingual.
Me *driving in car*: Ok Google, open Spotify..
Google *beep*: Không chắc chắn làm thế nào để Open Spotify (Not sure how to to "Open Spotify" - in Vietnamese)
Me: Ok Google, mở Spotify (same command in Vietnamese)
Google *beep*: Not sure how to "mở Spotify"...
Me *frustrated*: Ok Google, f*ck you!
Google *beep*: Không chắc chắn làm thể nào để "fuck you" (Not sure how to "fuck you" - in Vietnamese)
f*cking Google Voice :|7 -
So I just booted up my laptop.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
WE'VE UPDATED OUR PRIVACY POLICY.
I agreed to all of it.
And continued my day.
Have a nice day everyone.
P.S no I'm not talking about emails11 -
My sister in law got me this guy for Christmas after I told her about devrant!
She found it in a rubber duck shop in Amsterdam.
Best sister in law!
11 -
I just saw a job post for a
"Sr. Software engineer intern".
Can someone explain. What in the world8 -
I could be wrong, but I believe all devs love a clear section saying
"Getting Started" to any form of documentation5 -
My school stores everyone's username and passwords (including admins) in plain text on a Windows 2007 server that they remote desktop into.8
-
Today I told my lead developer that I liked star wars episode 8.
I got grilled pretty hard.
Like, I can drop a db and the motherfucker ain't gon give a fuck. But God forbid a mofocka likes episode 8.
That is a big no no to him.
Manager had told me that I should keep that opinion of the movie to myself.
Lesson learned.13 -
Four meetings today.
Legal was not involved in legal agreement changes until I refused to make them without Legal signing off. Legal changed several things, leading to:
Project scope changed size from large to minuscule to small to medium.
Details changed at every step.
Despite being incredibly structured and process-heavy, people at this company are so disorganized. 😕4 -
A friend found this Microsoft link a few weeks ago. The background image is missing because it's been removed from imgur and it's still broken to date 🤔
https://microsoft.com/upgradecenter...
10 -
A common scenario strikes again today:
- Blocked on a problem at the end of the day
- Tell my wife I'm headed home
- Inspiration strikes
- time flies by coding in the zone
- realize I'm super late
- run out the door like a crazy person1 -
I had a weird dream last night where people communicated by using log statements.
Like if I wanted to say something very loud I'd think Log.wtf("WTF!") and it would appear in front of me like subtitles. Log levels were equivalent to tone level.
The scene was basically a bunch of people with log statements of various levels in front of them and their lips moving with no sound.
I think I need a vacation.2 -
Night before flying internationally includes the following checklist:
- check VPN works, can access frontend sites and hit the backend
- git push4 -
This morning I kept falling back asleep after the alarm went off, drifting in and out of a dream about programming.
My wife finally said "no more sleeping".
Still mostly sleep, I replied very confidently "you can't sleep in a sandbox!".
I was dreaming I was in a code sandbox. Obviously sleeping is not allowed.
Jeez, my head has been really full of programming since this conference. (One of the talks was on codesandbox). -
Today the lead developer and I where loling and wtfing hard to the following code:
if ($looked_column == true)
{
$trunca = 1;
}
else
{
$trunca = 1;
}
Mind you, we had no clue why he named the variable $trunca, and even then it had been set at the top of the file as 1 to begin with....was never used up to this line and $looked_column had also a set to true.
This is why a lot of people give php a bad reputation. This right here is why people make fun of php......15 -
When you need stress ball but dont have enought ++ to request one then you need to order one cheap from ebay because i really need it when code isnt working, teacher fuck something up (again) and lot of stuff gets fucked up 😭😭😭
6 -
GTX 1080 now down to $499 due to 1080ti release!
..bought an aftermarket 1070 for $450 just a few months ago.
I'm not mad, just disappointed.8 -
Hey guys and ladys. I've got another little rant about my teacher.
As some of you may know, i finished my final exams last week, so basically every relevant grade is done. Every teacher except of my special snowflake programming teacher spends the lessons casually talking with us (some even say we dont need to show up anymore).
Little backstory: Grades need to be done on 18th, June and i get my certificate on 22nd.
Back to my rant. Special Snowflake is different. He wants ANOTHER project. This is totally his idea and is nowhere mentioned in our curriculum. It has to be done until next friday, it has to be C# and we need a detailed documentation. This wouldn't be a problem normally - if I wouldn't be moving at the moment. Special Snowflake knows this but doesn't care.
Except from the criteria above he wants it to be:
- fancy
- loved by everyone. Literally we need to make something EVERYBODY wants in their daily life
- good looking
- everyone should want to pay money for this
How am I supposed to come up with an idea and program the shit out of it in less than 2 weeks, which i need to paint my new office and pack some more stuff.3 -
I'm such an idiot.
Spilled water on my MacBook today. Not that much water, but the cup landed right in the middle of my keyboard.
Worst part is I was gaming with my sister and didn't want to stop. So I wiped it off and shook it out a bit and kept playing. A bit later the screen started flickering and eventually went black.
Finally my brain turned on and I switched it off, shook out some more water, and set it up to dry. Just hoping it's not too late.
At least the drying setup recommended by the internet is pretty hilarious looking.
Now we play the waiting game. They say 72 hours before turning it on again. Seems a bit extreme. Will there still be moisture evaporating 3 days later? Not sure I can wait that long to see if it's toast.
Such an idiot.
14 -
Attend all the meetings, they said. They're super important, they said. You'll get more code done if we hyper-report on progress they said. The bugs are piling up and we need to have even more meetings, they said.
STOP SAYING THINGS AT ME AND LET ME FUCKING CODE YOU INSUFFERABLE CUNTS.2 -
Let me tell you a story.
Our company has a homegrown monitoring solution. Keeps track of our deployments and alerts us when something is broken. Really nice for the most part, except a little issue where we get up to 25 alerts PER DAY that our PRODUCTION ENVIRONMENT IS DOWN. Including weekends.
With this many false positives, we quickly learn to ignore the alerts and miss real incidents.
So we approached this team, remember its our own tool, and told them about the problem. Turns out it is a known issue. And here's the kicker: they aren't planning on fixing it!
It gets better. Rather than fix this glaring issue, their solution is to make ANOTHER ALERT that lets us know the monitoring is misbehaving.
To recap, we can now expect to get up to 25 false positive alerts per day that our production is down, followed immediately by more alerts that the monitor is broken, which means we can ignore the previous alert.
As our PM said when he heard this: fuck that noise. We are escalating the shit out of this!7 -
After doing the work he requested as he wanted he was not happy. So i thought we sit and discuss what he didn't like. I was so wrong.
...
Boss: "...you know what I think you are: a fraud; Masquerading as a developer. The database design you have given is shit. The template I gave you I did in 1 hour. You took half the day."
He gave a simple template to use and he told me to come up with an ecommerce db design via downloading PrestaShop and seeing what is relevant to us.
Me: "what did I do wrong?"
Boss: "you think I don't know what PK means in database design? Why the fuck did you put this here."
Me: "can I expl..."
Boss: "I'm not finished, you been here half the month and what work have you to show for it..."
Me: "I have..."
Boss: "You shut up when I can speaking"
Me: "ok"
Boss: "You have no work to show for the time you have been here. I tell you what to do. I want someone who is proactive. My friend, you will do the work I tell you to do, you understand?"
Me: "yes but can I just say that I have been doing your work I have the contact the various developers as you..."
Boss: " You shut up when your boss is speaking. Can you do this work? (Slightly long pause)
Me: "I can do it. But, I have done the bits of the work you said I do. I was h..."
Boss "don't give me bullshit stories...you haven't done the work..."
Me: "But you have spoken"
Boss:" You know what Im giving you 1 weeks notice if you are not able to do the work. Can you do it?"
That moment!!! I was literally shaking I could have high fived his face with his laptop.
Me: "yes I can"
Boss: "Then get the fuck out of my sight and do it"8 -
*spends a long time crafting a huge eBay post (we're moving)
* tries to drag and drop first picture
* page navigates to the picture without warning
* loses everything
WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
WHEN DRAGGING A PICTURE INTO A WEB PAGE I NEVER WANT TO NAVIGATE TO A PAGE WITH JUST THAT IMAGE. WHY NO WARNING BEFORE LEAVING THE PAGE. WHY DON'T YOU SAVE TEXT LOCALLY. WHY DOES THE WEB SUCK SO HARD. AAAGGGHHHH.
* feels better
* starts over7 -
Netflix, why is your loading spinner so horrible!
Do you know what a percentage is??? 99% means you are ALMOST done. Just a tiny fraction to go. I should not see 99% for seconds or even minutes on end. Much less after the first 98% took only a couple seconds!!
Stop the lies!!!5 -
I am watching a video from Google I/O when they said "Ok Google", and my phone turned on (though saying "Your voice was not recognized")2
-
Introduction to graphics
Lecturer says "this is a very practical course. In fact I think we should have a practical exam"
All students agree. He would sort out that matter.
Meanwhile he taught us how to making shapes in java, then a house, then a game...
And the exam was for us to make a building where a user can walk through the building using the arrow keys...
What fun we had. We got out marks...and everybody did well!!!!1 -
I'm curious, is email campaigns such as 'constant contact' part of a devs job? new job wants me to be in charge of this and I could not think of a worse job I would like to do.
I don't even check my own email!
I hate social media and suck at posting anything besides random useless memes.
REALLY??! Email campaign????19 -
My new fitbit reminds me take 250 steps each hour. When I do stop and take a walk, I find it helps my productivity, and I feel better. However, I'm not good at keeping to it.
It's always the same story.
"Quiet you, I'll get up and walk once I finish this one thing".
...
Another hour goes by.
If only I could keep to my own convictions.4 -
Friend gave me his cheap few dollars wifi adapter.
Took it connected to PC. And tried monitor mode. Ofcourse it isnt gonna work. Yup not working.
OK lets search for better driver for this thing. Hmmmmmm
Compiling error. Well thats what i get for getting the latest kernel. Well incompatible pointer type.
Nah fuck that.
-Wno-incompatible-pointer-type Boooom build.
Installed.
Loaded.
Can connect to network (Amazing i know. Who would say that wifi can connect to wifi AP LOOOOL)
And monitor mode works too.
Packet injection works too.
Good stuff.
And best part is that i had an old router with looooong antena on it and it wasnt working since i fried the CPU on that one. (I posted rant about that. USB mod didnt go as planed when somebody scares you when you are soldering)
So i took the antena and well now i have Wifi adapter with monitor working that can get wifi from next fucking street and maybe even the next street after that one since aluminium pointer is good.
And yes ofcourse the pull request is already sent in the second i fixed it.3 -
Software Devs are less supportive than the community tries to convey. They're also part of the most self-deluded and obnoxious crowd that exists on earth.
Someone saying they don't enjoy coding 24/7 outside of work? You actually enjoy totally different hobbies that have next to nothing to do with coding?
- Shitty developer, you should probably work elsewhere. Maybe flipping burgers.
"Coding in <Framework X> is SO friggin' easy. You're basically subhuman garbage if you can't learn it within a month!"
Watch some YouTube Videos with the "Freelancer Success Stories" of dudes that haven't - apparently coded, ever - and started to code late in life and tell you how perseverance and learning brings the success and yet you never see any repos of those guys. You see those guys mostly go on for up to half an hour to regurgitate some hot garbage you can read up within two minutes yourself from ANY coding blog.
You're not using a macbook to develop?
- "Oooof, man! How can you?"
You don't really like "Popular Framework X"?
- Especially when it comes to Frontend Frameworks prepare to either die on the hill of your beliefs or die a futile and slow death when people - more or less - snarkily try to dissect your opinion in order to try - again, more or less - to hide their own bias. Because don't forget, your opinion is OBJECTIVELY wrong and you simply happen to a garbage developer for (dis-)liking something.
You DO like "Popular Framework X"?
- Well, rinse and repeat basically.
You struggle to get a new job?
- All your fault. You clearly didn't spend enough time coding; you should have at least 12 Open-Source Projects with at least 100k downloads the week.
There is actually a whole lot more, but I feel I'm basically done with software dev. Software development is neither creative nor terribly fun. I'm just angry at myself that I switched careers for the money.22 -
I spent more than an hour trying trying to debug why two functions were always returning undefined. I even put in conditional breakpoints and executed the statements to confirm the logic was correct.
I forgot return.4 -
I think my productivity at work seriously went up when I discovered this site with custom noise generators. Blocks out my coworkers, and I can pretend it's raining all the time. Perfect for coding!
http://mynoise.net/NoiseMachines/...2 -
family: oh cmon, how hard it can be
me: what do you mean
family: youre just sitting in front of that pc all day
me: yeah, thats how we ...
family: youre not working! youre sitting in one place the whole day2 -
fren: do you have a date this valentines?
me: nah fam
fren: what u doin rn
me: [Insert technical explanation of Kubernetes here]
fren: [goes offline]2 -
You give up romancing for some time because you're tired of getting mixed signals all the time. Decide to focus on programming instead and then shit like this happens:
4 -
Coding has given me the ability to turn my favorite hobby into a career. This in turn gave me the chance to take jobs in three countries so far (US, Germany, UK). So, I can explore the world with lovely wife while doing something I'm really passionate about and constantly learning. It also allows me to relate more to my dad, a software engineer of about 30 years who got me started when I was a kid.
In short, coding changed everything for me.
PS: I met my wife in intro to CS, though she's not a developer. -
After being live multiple years supporting only Safari, Firefox, and Chrome, one customer wanted IE support. After taking a close look at the usage numbers, and discussing with us front-end devs, our product guy shot it down. Pop the champagne!2
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It means a lot to me to be able to rant and just get my thoughts out. Today I have been struggling with my mind again, finding no joy in software development. I feel like I can't catch up, I can't learn all that is needed to keep going on in the industry. I can't write any cool libraries or do anything really complex, no matter how much time I devote to learning and coding. And due to my late start in that career I feel absolutely worthless. The fact that I've been at this for 4+ years absolutely boggles my mind. In a more competitive work-place I would've have been sieved out.
8 -
When your company buys a third party solution and you spend all your time emailing them about bugs in their system.
Seriously, I even sent you the exact line of the bug in your JavaScript with a suggested solution, and deployed a new stack with your latest (broken) fix so you can test out that solution. Then you email back saying it is fixed but it is clearly still broken. If I email you a fixed version of your file will you deploy it? OMG!1 -
Source code works on my local machine, even when I present it to the relevant users; no body panics its all part of the plan. Place it on the server and it does not work AND EVERYONE LOSES THEIR MIND!1
-
Just to be clear - this is not a rant!
Seeing as I have a useless domain, as far as public access is concerned,m, I’ve thrown up a design to make use of it.
This is a feedback session, so I’m really just looking for any takers who want to give any advice, ideas, ect on this.
https://c0d4-playground.ga9 -
Recently did a fresh installation of brothers laptop of windows 10 and found this gem at after installing chrome and running it for the first time
chrome://welcome-win10/
suck it micro$oft
1 -
Tried mx 17 linux today. Was completely blown away by how fucking good the system is. I am really tempted to nuke my windows installation in one of my computers and just run this baby from it. Nothing is really holding me back from it. I already have two other macs and another ubuntu laptop. Can think of a reason why i would need windows at this time but i am still hesitant.
Plus...i am taking on a big rails project.....might be good to have this thing set up for it as are the other two macs. Mmmmmhmm decissions decissions.
What do y'all think? Yes or nah?5 -
Joins Skype group dev talk
20mins in mutes microphone
Co worker mentions something I am working on
Me: starts talking for a minute
Coworker: randomly interrupts me, like legit no warning, he just started talking....
Me: wait what da faq
OH wait I'm not mute....
Shit -
Me: OK, Google.
Google: Hi, how can I help?
Me: Open example.com
Google: OK, which browser?
Me: Google Chrome.
Google: Sorry, I didn't get you.
Me: Google Chrome.
Google: Sorry, I didn't get you again. Just say the name of the app.
Me: *Looks at the list and finds Chrome (without 'Google')* Chrome
Google: *Opens Chrome*
I couldn't reproduce it as the. Latest version of Google Assistant now opens the page in a WebView.
7 -
Arguing with my girlfriend (recalled from my mind, not 100% accurate)
she: What do you expect when you buy an android?
Me: sure thing apple is more "unpack it, use it", easy to use - but android is more like an empty canvas. The first thing when I buy it is setting it up to my needs.
she: You don't understand, what do you expect from your android device?
me: It has to be affordable and work for a certain time
she: No I mean, do you.. when you unpack your phone, expect it TO WORK?
me: Sure, it's not like I buy a pile of trash, I expect it to work
she: you're too stupid, baka
me: ... ? *confused*
she: When you say it is like a canvas, isn't a canvas someday full?
me: yes, every phone, iPhone, Pixel, Samsung, every phone has a limited memory
she: *mad* you don't get it, silly
me: I want to but heh, I don't get it10 -
When you make a mistake and try to fix it, but you can't remember how to spell amend...
git commit --ammend
error: unknown command `amend'
git commit -ammend
[branch-name] mend
Huh?
git log
commit #
mend
Created a new commit with message 'mend'. Now to clean this all up and go get some sleep!2 -
>laptop can't handle 3 terminals because cpu is single-core 1.2GHz
>fuck it
stress -c 128 -i 128 -m 16
>second terminal
top
>load average: 272.15, 247.60, 149.80
>CPU is cool after 30 minutes
>how
>picks up laptop from right side
>burned myself
>cpu is on the left under power button, right side has nothing that would get hot???
>takes apart laptop
>second large CPU-like die
wtf.386
>looks up laptop
>floating point/algebraic coprocessor
WHAT
and that was the story all about how my life got flipped turned upside down
what fucking system has a coprocessor after 2002? (My laptop is a 2008 HP something or other)3 -
ummm okay?
Can't blame them really. Most of the people are too stupid to understand that they have to press okay to proceed.
5 -
Being thrown in the deep end, baptism by fire is the best/worst way to learn a new codebase
Its not appropriate for everyone but it weirdly works -
Deep Thought Rant
It's funny how the world works these days...companies only looking for "senior *something*" developers to work...
Mentorship and internship also do matter. What's happening?...sure you can contribute to open source but having a mentor also helps. Working as an intern allows one to see not only tech bit but workplace environment. How to deal with deadlines, feeling good and wasted at the same time when one bug that took a 3 minutes to fix but 3 hours to find, presenting your work; well what's working only, being bashed when it's your fault or not (even though that sucks), learning from your mentor and so on
Are their companies that still do this?3 -
Years ago, one of my friends in college was taking an intro to CS class. He asked me for help on one of his assignments. It was a simple Python program, but it wasn't running as expected. I go in figuring it will be easy to fix. But everything looks exactly right. An hour later I'm tearing my hair out! It isn't even entering the function although it's clearly called. I'm beginning to feel very self conscious, as a CS major who can't even debug a 15 line program for a friend.
Then it hit me. This is Python. I used an editor macro to convert all indentation to tabs, lined them up, and it ran on the first try. Turns out, he had somehow ended up with a mixture of tabs and spaces.
I'm not sure what the takeaway is, but I think he got a surprisingly honest introduction to the life of a developer...2 -
Java teacher writes code on blackboard in comp lab
He tells us to try it out at our workstations.
We do. The code does work. We tell him.
He says: "There is something wrong with your compiler..."
Question is...we were around 30 students. Can all our compilers not work if we had used the lab before and the code we run worked clean??!?!?!?
We were flabbergasted2 -
!rant
Super awesome day today.
1. Got up early to do a risky production deploy and it worked!
2. Three PRs approved before lunch.
3. Got some time to continue learning scala.
4. Coffee and cupcakes with some refugees and discussed work as a software engineer.
5. Tried virtual reality for the first time. Really fun.
6. Helped prepare our goals for this quarter and present them to the department.
7. Department meeting had free local craft beer and pretzels.
8. Went bouldering after work and flashed a 6c.
9. Curled up with my wife watching Netflix.
I really love my life sometimes.5 -
PSA: negate your tests and make sure they fail!
I have what I thought was a weird and slightly paranoid habit. When I write tests sometimes just as a sanity check negate the assertion to make sure the test fails and isn't a false positive. Almost always fails as expected.
But not today! Turns out I had forgotten to wrap my equality check in an assertion so it would always pass. It freaks me out to imagine pushing a test that always passes not just because it doesn't do its job, but could also obscure a bug and trick me into thinking it works differently than it does. Broken tests are the worst!
But it pays to be paranoid. -
Me: *adds a shiny new graph to our foos web app showing player ratings*
Fred: Can I please have a button to see just my scores?
Me: *adds "JUST FRED" button*
Fred: perfect, thanks4 -
hello +1000 club! got my +1000 shoes, my +1000 desk and my +1000 sungluses now all I am missing is a vader helmet..2
-
I don't wanna ask (insert search engine of your choice) but devRant today:
How would you define a
- nerd
- geek
etc
Is it an insult or status to be proud of?12 -
Every website we craft at work has some email substitution logic so that addresses you see on the site don't actually exist in the HTML source like that (you wouldn't find them in a format like "foo@example.com").
Instead the @ and the period right before the TLD get replaced with something else (to prevent (dumb) spam bots from using that address and blast it with junk).
Some people replaced them with images in the past (ew), replaced the @ with "(at)" or other stuff.
I made it a habit to render the @ and . by replacing them with span tags which then get a ::before in CSS that contains "content: '@';", so that the @ is visible but is not actually inside the HTML source code.
The classes for these spans then have a random name (persistent for that website though). The first one was called "move-along-nothing-to-see-here", but then I started naming them after Star Wars quotes.
One website's @ class is called "that-s-no-moon" (Obi Wan), others are called "i-have-a-bad-feeling-about-this" (Han Solo), "powerful-you-have-become-the-dark-side-I-sense-in-you." (Yoda) and "these-are-not-the-droids-you-are-looking-for" (Obi Wan).12 -
About to give my first presentation on web development! Wish me luck, I've never felt more out of my league, even though I've been a dev for years.5
-
When you are involved in a conflict of interest project and its kept under wraps ...but your IT director still wants you to do it because his friend needs something done but don't want to pay for it
Who else has faced this? Or am I the only one...?3 -
Only at work can I come back from the breakroom full of cookies and snacks for mymanager to promptly give me a pass to Golds Gym :V she is telling me that I is fat I guess :V
;_____; i am not fat, just eat like a fatboi -
I'm tempted at some point to get a non-dev job. After about 2 weeks I could automate everything then just slack off.5
-
When you offer to help out a fellow coworker on the top priority feature he is developing and he just sends you the branch and stops working on it.2
-
I get home today and my wife says:
"Just finished some chores and really want to play stardew valley, but the computer has been updating for an hour!"
Windows 10 anniversary update strikes again.3 -
imagine how much more intricate https would be without rsa, leaving us with just aes. i mean, youd have to have servers responding with isps, info is easily tracked.
-
In uni
Lecturer: SOAP is insecure...
In interview: Any disadvantages you see with SOAP?
Me: The last i read SOAP is insecure. Im abit rusty with this knowledge
Interviewer: ahhh okay, SOAP is actually secure...
DAMN YOU LECTURER!2 -
It's only August but I already know what I'll be thankful for come Thanksgiving:
1. Our next president.
2. Integration tests.1 -
We've been using private GitHub repos as a distribution method for our personal npm packages at work for years.
I finally got sick of it and did the work to publish them to artifactory yesterday. Today, I worked out the remaining kinks, fixed the CI builds, and wrote a wiki page explaining the change with step by step migration instructions and sent it around to the rest of the devs. And it's working great!
I feel simultaneously like a hero for finally getting this fixed and an idiot for putting up with it for so long.
Also thankful for my devops friend who helped a bunch.1 -
What happens when you give a database design to your boss as per what he wants done, he sees it is not impressed, scolds you, curses you out and claims you are 'fraud'. Then you tell him you can do better to redeem yourself...you submit the work better than the first time
And then he terminates you due to 'lack of proficiency'.3 -
Generator functions should be treated like sorting algorithms: Not worth your time if all you have is 4 or less async instructions.
Callback hell is actually kind of nice and warm when you're a just a few levels down. If you're really confused by your obfuscated code, you suck at node. -
How can you bring in a PBX device with no manual at all and the settings are all in Chinese and expect me to be a God and configure it?2
-
So, I'm looking into something and end up on Stack Overflow. Someone posted the question:
"Does minified javascript improve performance?"
This question was old as shit, all they way from 07/25/09, and about an Adobe Air application. (Remember that? Me neither...) It had a great, accepted, and still accurate answer, posted the same day the question was asked. Now, fast forward 8 years and on 12/08/17 (A mere 7 months ago...) the following answer was posted. I don't know what they were thinking, but here it is, complete and unabridged, with my comments in square brackets:
"I'd like to post this as a separate answer as it somewhat contrasts the accepted one: [Somewhat contrasts? More like completely contradicts...]
Yes, it does make a performance difference as it reduces parsing time - and that's often the critical thing. For me, it was even just simply linear in the size and I could get it from 12s to 4s parse time by minifying from 3MB to 1MB. [First off, your parse time should NEVER be THE critical thing, but secondly, and more importantly, WHO THE FUCK HAS 1MB OF MINIFIED JS ON A PAGE!!!]
It's not a big app either, it just has a couple of reasonable dependencies. [THERE IS ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY NOTHING REASONABLE ABOUT ANYTHING HE JUST SAID! What dependancies is he using?! You could use minified and not even gzipped jQuery, AngularJS, Vue, Ember, React, AND Dojo libraries on the SAME PAGE, AND have 118k of application code, AND STILL NOT HAVE HIT 1MB QUITE YET!!!]
So the moral of the story here is: Yes, minifying is important for performance - and not because of bandwidth, but because of parsing. [Javascript should NEVER take longer to parse then to download, even on a low powered device...]"
So, yeah, I'm at a loss for what this guy was thinking, but the thought the people like this exist, and that my browser might one day be subjected to their horrific nightmare of code terrifies me...2 -
I was hired as a wpf dev for a large scale project and I was told that the backend is perfectly complete and that I am able to work right away, then after I started working, I noticed that every request I sent was returning a 500 internal error, I thought it was a problem on my end, but later I found out that they didn't even implement the api yet, it was just a "reference" for devs, which basically means that I should work and give them a perfectly functional app without testing anything at all.1
-
I want to buy a beer for everyone who developed the mobile pass app. Just breezed through immigration and customs without waiting in the 1 hour+ line. Technology wins. Cheers!1
-
Whoot, humble bundle has some new competition for their ebook offerings.
https://www.fanatical.com/en/ebooks
3 -
Things you should not say on your last day of work:
If I broke it, I think it would be pretty obvious. -
So, apparently, in 2015 our webhost (ixwebhosting) was purchased by Site5... This week, they finally migrated us to Site5 servers without warning, taking my email down in the process...
Today, after following the instructions in their own KB article (that tells you to click an icon that doesn't exist,) and chatting with support for over an hour, I was told that the new system they migrated us to doesn't support catch-all email accounts... At all... It's simply not possible to receive an email that was sent to your domain, unless the email address exists in the system somewhere... Despite the fact that it's a standard cPanel feature, that the old and new systems both use cPanel, that every other webhost I have ever seen that uses cPanel has this feature available, AND the fact that this is an important feature for a lot of websites, because they pipe all of their emails to a script for processing... It's simply not possible... They won't be providing that feature anymore. Nor for that matter is it possible to be migrated back...
They migrated accounts to a system that has a basic email function intentionally disabled, without warning... And we can't afford to open an account with someone else ATM... So I can't get any email until we get migrated... FML9 -
Is it OK to bludgeon the noisy, moaning, constantly negative 'devs' sitting opposite (and who deliver nothing) with my chair?4
-
Started work in the morning, after a couple of hours was 90% done and would be clicking the checkbox on trello that task is completed.
Lol.
Found a bug.
OK, debugging time.
Spend an hour on trying to fix the simplest bug ever,( php was creating a file that had the contents but the wrong name)
At this point I was starting to get super pissed of cuz in 30min I need to go meet up with some friends.
LOL ok, fuck this shit, I don't want to do this anymore.
Made the bug into a feature that now you can have multiple authority(admin) accounts.
My teamm8 was like lol ok, we didint really need this but it will be useful so nice job.
👏GREAT MORNING:))))1 -
Just attended my first conference and it was awesome! So many new ideas, but also tired and overloaded. Can't decide if I should code tonight, go to bed early, or just do something mindless.1
-
So what do you call people who like Apple devices only or Android devices only? Or someone who thinks Apple devices are superior only or Android devices are superior only ?
Devicist ???11 -
Just moved countries and started a new job at an awesome company, which is so great I have nothing yet to rant about.
Oh here goes: almost three weeks with no internet at home and no end in sight.2 -
A Chinese coworker who always brought a tea flavoured hand lotion bottle and applied it before coding on his finger tips and wore the same clothes from Monday to Friday changed only his shoes...2
-
It looks like Windows almost stopped me from exiting the mall. I had to call customer care to save me from situation. The toll station froze on me. Why Windows? Why?
3 -
I had an interesting mystery the other day. I work in the UK, but I'm working remotely from the US for a while. First day, I made some changes, ran the tests and they failed. Weird part was the failing test was for a component I hadn't touched. I took a closer look, and realized it was a date off by several hours. The test was checking that a passed in date appears in the output. But it was creating the date by parsing a string. The library I was using defaults to local time, but the component uses UTC. So, I had inadvertently created a unit test that only passes when run from UTC. But I had never noticed before because my work is in that timezone. Yikes!
-
I know there is SoundCloud, Earbits for music... Sometimes I use YouTube.
I am coding to get to my beast mode but my YouTube mix picks up a song I don't want and then I change tabs just to skip or change your mix...then poooofff
ALL OVA SURRRDDDDEN
You are watching "scaring cats videos" -
So this stupid fuck whose react code is a clusterfuck of bugs just bashed me when I said Java is better then node because of reasons...
I was literally speechless while thinking if I should humiliate her or not.
Guess life will show her because I don't give a fuck. -
Hands on experience is the best. Lemme tell ya.
So recently a friend has been bugging (in a good way) me about getting to one of my projects. So, about a week and a half ago I finally got along to starting. I tried using existing FOS projects to mold together as my own, but that didn’t work. So I made it from scratch. At first it was frustrating because I didn’t know PHP, but now I think I got the gist of it.
Almost a week and a half now and quite the progress has been made, at least to what I had expected... now I’m addicted to coding. I hate food. And people. I love my code, no matter how terrible it is.1 -
Why is so Fitbit so bad at multiple time zones??
Guess what, people get on planes and travel.
Every time, my Fitbit gets so screwed up, including things like changing previous step counts, or duplicating an entire day of steps.
I understand MTZ is a tough problem, but this is just unacceptable. I'm not obsessed with my steps, but when your product is all about counting something, seems like you should be more careful to avoid double counting or not counting at all. Seriously, how much R&D have they invested in their hardware and apps, but it completely fails when you travel. Get it together!1 -
I found out why my local server kept going offline.
Due to living constraints, it has to be connected to the network via wifi. The cable connecting the wifi card to the computer appears not to work when bent in a specific direction...
Why can't cables that come with things be of good quality?2 -
Client push back: when the client wants an impractical feature to be implemented and you tell them HELL NO, with a little sugar coating of course
-
Computer does a BSOD right at the end of a tiebreaker competitive overwatch match where the enemy is about to cap the point and win. I'm one of the tanks. Hard reboot and back in the game within 45s. Just barely hold them off in overtime and win the match. Epic!
Thank God for SSDs!4 -
I now leave my work IM status as "Away". It's the only way people leave me alone so I can get work done...*shrug* ☺1
-
It drives me crazy when there are unclosed parens or quotes anywhere.
Is it too much to ask for people to run their Facebook posts through a compiler first? -
When everyone thinks FE is easier, quicker, and less important than BE. Just because our fantastic UX people made you a high fidelity mockup in a day does not mean we can build the whole FE in a week.
This is why I'm returning to full stack. -
Current Mac and Windows user here looking to get back into Linux. Any distro suggestions?
Looking for something not too high maintenance.7 -
Best tip for getting unstuck? If it's after your usual leaving time, GO HOME.
So many times I solved the problem right away the next morning. Only wish I followed my own advice more often... -
me: clicks button run
program starts throwing out fatal errors
me: shhhhhhhh, whats wrong, whos hurting you?:'(
i sed the shhhhh part out loud, not even realizing it🤦♂️2 -
Rejected for the job . Out in technical round, though i gave all the correct answers.
Me: seating outside with a down face.🦁
HR: what happened? you seems to bit low .
Me: sir ,got rejected in technical round.🐷
HR: work on mistakes.
Me: yeah sir🦊
Inner me: tell me the mistakes fucker...
Why ? Why? Why?
Dealing with rejection for no reason 🐀17 -
I'm tired of react.js' overbearing presence in almost all facets of development. It doesn't matter what kind of job postings I see, Front- or Backend Developer, a baffling amount of companies want react, react-native, next.js, etc. I'm exhausted by people singing high-praises to its name, hearing ad-nauseam, that it is the most immaculate 'framework' to ever exist. Everything that react does makes - of course - sense and is the only logical way to do web-dev and the react-way worms it way to other technologies as well.
"React is the fastest, bestest and most popular ever and you should feel ashamed for not having mastered it. By the by, since it's so easy to use and learn, if you can't build a high-complexity enterprise SPA within a week with it, you must suck as a dev".
True, nobody words it like that, but that's how I feel about almost any react related articles that pops up every single time. I couldn't get into react. I didn't find it easy and I never could adopt that thought-model necessary to work with it for any even mildly complicated SPA and boy, did I get some nasty feedback for it. I get it, I do. I'm slow and definitely not proud of it, but react simply makes no sense to me. I'm not even saying that react is bad. It's just not my kind of technology. The fact that I used nest.js for a backend application makes feel bad, because it's "too much like Angular".
Everything has to be "react" nowadays and that's how I feel every single day, while I have that damocles sword looming over my head.
The current dev-world makes me want to abandon anything IT related at this point. It's simply not fun, it's more suffocating than it ever was.8 -
I was always interested in computers. My dad was a big computer geek and a programmer to boot. Usually had a couple old PCs in the basement to play with.
In middle school, I took tech ed and we made simple web sites with html and css. I remember the struggle of nested tables.
In high school, I couldn't fit any CS into my schedule. But someone gave me a learning to code book in ruby. I loved it, and have been hooked ever since. -
Why are you paying me to architect your new stack if you're just going to mandate that I use Guice and Jersey "because that's what you're using already"? I'm sorry. You're wrong. Spring Boot is not a "dying technology". I'm not going to build you a servlet from scratch. Get fukt.1
-
Pycharm why you no allow me to continue to use the professional edition...
Damnn and they way pycharm has served me well7 -
Fuck companies that want you to build new systems that are a superset of what they already have when they can't even tell you what they have now. Fuck you with your bullshit, nonsensical, self-contradicting, third-assed diagrams--some half-UML, half-clip-art, half-pie-chart drivel. If you're the CTO of a company and you want me to think long and hard about rebuilding your distributed systems, you can think long and hard about expressing what you already have. And NO: a verbal explanation pow-pow WebEx over your DSL connection with your protege that mumbles worse than an Atlantan rapper doesn't count as fucking "knowledge transfer" of your fucking architecture, FOR FUCKS SAKE.
-
Its funny when your code is tested by your peers and they approve it and it works...and when you present your progress to your PO he says it doesnt work...hmmmmm1
-
Something very interesting today
I worked on an API feature and it was approved and merge to the stable copy of the project. But then comes the demo.
Now we used Heroku(this devil)
The database uses sqlite. I can register an account on the web application. But the user table has only the admin account even though i have successfully managed to register.
I dont know what sorcery this was!
I simply went with the saying "it is working on my local machine"
Only to realise minutes to the demo the build pack was not done well at the beginning...
What is life... -
Lead developer likes premature optimization. Always forces me to remove a if here and there because "bad for the performance".
Now her optimization caused a base component to fail, ppl will have to spend the night debugging.
Best of all, it's my last day ;) -
There are days you feel like a God and there days you have no idea what you are doing in the dev space.
All in all perseverance with a whimsical tone -
NO! Use the description instead of the primary key because the key might change ................................................................................................................... vs the description .............................................................................................................. the key more likely .............................................. meh2
-
All married devs here who married devs
Why did you chose a dev and not another profession?
Of course skipping the love4 -
Any recommendations for moving a blog?
My wife and I just cancelled our account with siteground hosting a WordPress blog. Looking for a cheaper alternative. Willing to get my hands dirty as a web dev, but would like a nice CMS experience for my wife. Also want to keep our existing content. If we can keep our custom domain somehow that would be a win.
Thanks!7 -
I started this one project as hobby, later on becomes we and we search for client. He assisted upto 30% only ui design. Now I am working 18,19 hours just to complete 2 project simultaneously. horrible experience taught me make sure you make written agreement before working as pair or partner
-
Trying to add money to a prepaid SIM card today. Their website is a mess. Plus and minus buttons were not functioning, so my only option was to add 15 euro. Checked the console, no errors. Tried triggering the buttons jQuery, no luck. Found a data value attached to the submit button set to 15. Changed to 10, clicked submit, and BOOM, it worked! You just got engineered!
After I paid, I was curious, went back and set it to -15, and tried it again. Unfortunately, they know about backend validation. -
Focus: Get up and walk around, disturb someone(calculated disturbing), break a window,
Procrastinating: DO IT NOW, JUST DO IT, MAKE YOUR DREAMS COME TRUE
....sorry
Yes my 2 cents -
Which of the two jobs is better for a frontend Dev:
1. React project, stressful, bad communication, depending on bad internal libraries
2. WordPress theme building, higher paid, promising startup with stock options8 -
Can i just get a simple consistent react tutorial that goes step by step even when consuming an API...
IS THAT SO HARD TO ASK FOR? -
You build, develop and test systems and software...but because its under the bracket of IT, they think playing music and kinda sorta being a DJ and watchman of a laptop during a promotion is sufficient for you.
-
Shallow() or To Mount()....shit react tests have been killing me. The issues on github have not been resolved. And our team lead has insisted on them even more. Haha they way I have been ditching them.
-
I dont understand why people talk so much crap about python. How it "pseudocode".. yea its a" joke" i get it. But if whoever is making said joke dont even know what pythonic programming is , nor practice it. Then said person dont really know how to code in python.. its more like modified c++ and they cant talk crap.
-
I walk by our devops dashboard several times per day. It keeps track of key metrics for all our live services. I noticed an interesting trend the last few weeks.
3 weeks ago: all metrics green
2 weeks ago: 1 metric red
1 week ago: 1 metric still red
this week: 1 metric still red but covered with a post it note -
Is it normal that my lead developer insists that if(x){return A} else {return B} must be changed to if (x){return A} return B, and a variable must be renamed from requestFn to requestFunc because the former is confusing?13
-
I'm pretty sure remote teams don't work with the remote team doing all the coding and we have the same exact JD and in the same department...*sigh* when management are foreign, they really are afraid of letting the local tech team help out. No wonder we are 3, sorry 2 since a fellow dev left to a better job in Amsterdam
-
Ran a test today. It was comparing whether a the reducer returned the correct state when a type and list is passed to it. The test failed. But something very curious happened. I am using webstorm and so the IDE told me 'click to see differences'. I did and the message at the top read as follows "The 2 lists are identical" (The expected and actual result). So my test worked but it didn't work. What is life!? I finally got it working though😕1
-
Damnnn my Team lead is hinting that i write a test for the feature I paired with a team member.
But the large django code base is ridden with abstract classes and classes and inheritance etc...its going to be a long night -
My lead developer requires object sorting, so {url, extraParams = { id = '1', hobby = 'code' }} HAVE TO be {extraParams = {hobby = 'code', id = '1'}, url}. Is that normal?4
-
Use Linear gradient ...
No use rgba
Arghhhh...okay rgba looks OK...wait linear gradient is better...no wait
Hallelujah!!!!!2 -
So in Seahorse (the Gnome secret manager) deleting the OpenSSH key doesn't just remove an identity from agent, it actually deletes the keyfile.
I should've treated that scary confirmation message more seriously.
Also, my obsessive full disk backups every Monday are totally worth the time.2 -
Well here i thought i would have done work...and pooof its time to go home
All i did was refactor with and make PR...
*SIGH*
I guess today was one of those days where little work was done -
When you are tearing you hair out trying to figure out why the PR you're reviewing isn't working. Then you realize you forgot to pull the latest changes!
-
Repel people who think just because I did IT (and they skip the part to ask, what specifically in IT), I can fix their computers only and I'm of no use beyond that. Immediately they think "he is an IT guy maybe he can fix..." Vrooommm and they are no longer in my view
Magnetic repulsion like how Magneto pushed away Logan in "Days of Future Past" -
I was out of work for 6 months...I applied at a company that takes in devs and trains them. There was a test, then a personal interview, then a bootcamp process...it was hard. But I pulled through.
-
My lead developer insists that an analytics value of "requestURL" should be window.document.location(which is an object) because in the analytics API doc it says this field "should be location of the current page, most probably window.document.location". Is she right?
-
Which should I choose:
Company A: much better pay and benefits, team seems nice, Glassdoor citing quite bad reviews about CEO and upper management.
Company B: current company. uninteresting field, team in distance, tech lead likes micro management and quite annoying in general. In middle of a project.5 -
Jest/enzym unit testing: My lead developer says using shallowWithStore instead of shallow on one incidence would introduce CPU overhead thus I MUST stop whatever I'm doing and fix the pull request. Is that normal?
-
Why does the biggest mobile money payment system in our country have such crappy documentation! Arghh
And they tell us to read the DOCUMENTATION it has all the answers -
Does it say something about a company if many of the devs in the team are employee-turned-consultants kept working in the same role?7
-
Glad to know I'm not the only one making such mistakes.
Edit: says: "Say "null" or tap on the microphone "
-
QA to Android Dev : "the app just force closed"
Android Dev : giving a Darth Vader look pretending to use the force.
QA : "won't work on me, i have the FORCE CLOSE" -
Anyone noticed that SitePoint is permanently "on sale", with discounts and stuff since they launched their premium programme 1 or 2 years prior?
When one sale ends, another one comes.
Plus now they hid away the subcategories, one must access them by knowing the subcategorie's URL haha
I have no understanding of this reasoning they have...1 -
You know it's Friday afternoon when your interface is broken because you tried to set the type to the string 'string' instead of the keyword string.
Interface IEnvironment {
name: 'string',
...
} -
String good =
"I'll never give up type systems!!"
+ " Do you hear me?!"
+ " Never!";
bad =
"Can't believe it made it all the way into prod."
% NaN + 3 / '11'
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