4am

"I need to brush my teeth before going to sleep 😵"
*goes to bathroom*
*washes hands*
*goes to bed*

1minute of heavy processing later

"FUCK"

When you realize that you're googling an error message you've implemented yourself

Google owns us.

The hardest part of being a programmer wasn't the education, the self-teaching, the sleepless nights or the hours of agony trying to fix a bug that would break a program I'd spend weeks working on.

It's the realization that my family, friends, coworkers...nobody understands at all what I do. They don't know of my failures or my triumphs. I can't talk about it with them and it's becoming more apparent to them that it's taking up more of my life. And in a way it feels like a part of myself has just become, well, alien.

Best way I can describe it is, it's like the "Tears in the Rain" scene from Blade Runner.

I'm stuck, I think. I know I've been shutting out people from my life more and more as I don't want to "deal" with people's issues, but I don't think it's been good. I'm can verify that I'm depressed beyond my normal levels.

It's time for me to make an appointment with a therapist.

Remember that you are loved here, and appreciated. Don't let anyone tell you different.

Stay strong.

Yep, that is so me!

Nerd problems... I just sneezed so hard my glasses fell off

I code
Therefore
I rant

My wife took the kids to the mall.
I work from home.

me: fuck yeah, I'll be able to work now, since I focus a lot more when there's a lot of silence in the house, looking forward to this coding session
me: *takes the fattest 2 hour nap*

I guess I was tired...

aaaaaand I did it again:

if( !txt.getText().length() != 0 ){

}

I'm done for today

*Client phones me at 11pm*
Client: It's not working!!
Me:What's the error you're getting?
Client: "Database connection error"
*Phones system/dB admin*
DB Admin: Yeah we had to change the SQL logins, I've sent you the new ones
*Phones junior dev in charge of dB programming*
Junior Dev: Yeah you'll just have to go and change the credentials. They're in all the places where we're using the dB, just before the statement, in the connection strings...

We make over 470 calls to the DB 😑

Just coded for ~14h straight. Started doing some super heavy code cleanup and refactoring. Almost cried when I saw my code from the past.

Maybe it's time to call it a day...

1. Buy a connected armwrist that tells you the time, how good your sleep is, your heartbeat and stuff like that
2. Manage to loose the cable that charges the device
3. Get mad
4. Finally decide to buy a new one after digging in your 50 m^2 flat in vain
5. Your stuff is coming in 12 years, I mean days. Have a lot of advertisement of this particular cable wherever you go for the next two weeks
6. The thing finally gets delivered. Let's not be stupid like before and put it in a logical place, like permanently plugged in the usb port above my computer tower.
7. Find the supposed lost cable at said place.

When you're so tired that you forget to put coffee in the coffee maker and get a cup of hot water instead.

Can't fall asleep because of unfinished code...

Wake up at 03:00 AM because of nightmares about bad code...

Too tired to finish code or rewrite bad code :'(

Started to take vitamins. Oversleeping is gone, constant fatigue is gone, and I also feel happy for no reason.

Me: ooh my eyes hearts, I have to sleep now, I fix this tomorrow morning.

(go to sleep)

Inner Me: hey
Me: ...
Inner Me: pisst! wake up
Me: what?? leave me alone I'm tired
Inner Me: remember that issue you had?
Me: yes?
Inner Me: this is how you can solve it
Me: great thanks, I'll fix it later
Inner Me: no no you have to fix it now
Me: I'm tired, I'll fix it first thing in the morning
Inner Me: no no you'll forgot it
Me: no I won't, let me sleep
Inner Me: no no you'll forget and I won't tell you again
Me: look I write it down in my phone now leave me alone
Inner Me: no no you have to fix it now.
Me: *crying* for God sake...

(gets out of bed and try to turn on PC and it's not starting, realizing that the power is out)

Me: you happy now, I fix it tomorrow.
Inner Me: no no stay awake till power is back on.
Me: SHUT THE FICN ON PICK OF CRAPE. Did SHDUHDBD DBDJDB

Well, I made a choice in life.

I'm going to stay and work in America after I graduate. In spite of all the shit talking I've done about its work ethics, benefits, politics, and culture.

This place is still home.

After trying out a trip to Europe for a few weeks I can't handle the idea of being 4,500 miles away from family and what few friends I have. I figured out what was true the whole time: I wanted to run away from my past. Breakups, a failed marriage proposal, a dead end job that I put up with only because I need to graduate. I've been angry and depressed over these things, but running away won't fix it.

I need to face reality and own up to it. I'll get a job as a developer in the states through hell or high-water.

Hi everyone! Progress is slow for the game development.
I'm finally (and hopefully) done character design though I have a fuckton to do for 10+ characters.
Tbh it was my first time but got the help from the art community to give me a lot of feedback!

if you are tired, so fucking tired you are not fast enough to double tap a rant.
tap.... *rant opens* fuck! back..
tap... tap *rant opens* *rant opens* what the... back back
tap..tap oh cmon! Not again! back back
tap..tap *++ turns red*
Whohooo im a fucking genius!

Story of my dev life the past few weeks

When I'm tired, I can't do a damned thing. If it takes effort or concentration, I'm useless. Games are just frustrating. If it's something enjoyable, I simply can't care enough to enjoy it. If I read a book, I can't focus on the words, and won't remember anything I read. If its mindless like watching Netflix, I won't remember the next day, or rather I'll remember just enough to ruin it for myself.

So why not sleep?

Because I've been feeling like this every day, all day long for months. No, that vile liquid called coffee doesn't help. If I rest my eyes and stop thinking for a few minutes, I wake up a little and can function normally for a minute or two before passing out again. I'm not depressed, or at least I don't think I am. I feel like my brain died or got replaced with a lizard's.

And this sucks because I'm still during the probation period at work, and learning the sprawling and intricate codebase is actually challenging. And they're giving me large tickets because I was a dummy and impressed them too much.

Idk what's wrong with me, but I hope it stops soon.
I miss being able to think and plan and do anything besides just struggle to stay awake. 😞

Oh, i have to get up in about 5 hours for work, but hey, now i know what microservices are 😅

Senior Engineer -
Hey. I have a code that hits API to get details and multithreading is implemented. Can you just change the URL formed to hit Api?

Me
Yeah sure why not.

Me
After some time I discover that the initial code itself wasn't working 😐
I realise i need to fix code, fix multithreading and then make the URL changes.

Just finished......Realised had to rant....

This is bullshit.

We've got a project where we need to build a robot that can:
A. Follow a line.
B. Avoid obstacles
C. Go through a maze.

This, in itself, is fine. I can manage.

The problem is, the teacher that is supposed to support the course, is never where he's supposed to be.
Ie: he was supposed to be in the classroom to answer questions and give feedback yesterday from 09:00 to 13:00. The fucker didn't fuckin show up.

OK, so today, he's supposed to be here too, I've been sat in his classroom without him waiting for over an hour...

Also, no way I can do the maze part without knowing what defines a fucking blocked path, is it going to be a physical object or is the line going to be a different cor if you're not allowed to pass there?

I'm getting tired of this bs.

*me at the morning

- 08:30 Ah, let me sleep juuust more 5 minutes, I even don't need alarm *turn alarm off"
*blink
- nah, I should go
- 10:45 what the...

Me: don't limit yourself! Learn more than one thing, experiment and learn more.

Devrant: don't use x. X is a piece of shit and its not worth it. This is better, and you are wrong.

I hate highly opinionated people. Devrant seems to be full of them.

I seriously believe this is why people like AlexDelarge left. Sooo many punchable motherfuckers up in this bitch man.

"Fucking leave then" ----> go fuck yourself. This platform is great. Some of y'all are great. Having frustrated virgins lurking around does not mean that all of us that like fucking around in here needs to leave.

"That's a frontend problem."

Really? And you call yourself the engineering lead? Oh right, "frontend is not engineering", was that it? Ok, thanks a lot for the help, you can continue licking your balls now. I don't know why I still bother trying to ask you for advice.

So tired of people hating on tools, frameworks, languages, libraries without investing the time to fully understand the offering.

Just because you don’t understand it, does not mean it’s shitty.

We used to use Trello for our team boards and was starting to transition to Gitlab's issues for better code integration...

I became aware that my boss was being "demanded" to have a better analytics of our team performance so I started digging more insightful issue/tasks software like YouTrack ( Jetbrains ) and Jira ( Atlasian ).

After 2 months of trial and learning I suggested we go with YouTrack.

"We" are now using it for about 6 months already and it is a fucking mess.

My peers have no clue how to scrum, even after my efforts to teach them and they even spent a fucking 3 days workshop about it on fucking Google (!?!?) without me ( there is a rant about it ).

My boss is a nice person but the dude lacks any trace of competence to manage anyone other than him.

I'm tired of babysitting a man that is 10 years older than me and has a car that costs almost 10x mine.

I'm two days back from vacation and I almost rage quited 5 times.

Constant battle of choosing self care over the code life.

So fuking tired...
60 work hours this week

I'll never cure my burn out this way...

I just wrote "git vomit" instead of "git commit".

IPod didn't sync well on my Linux machines so decided to give windows - in a highly isolated environment disconnected from the Internet behind a firewall and sandbox - a shot with itunes.

- during the installation it wouldn't detect the fucking harddrive multiple times (genuine unlicensed copy) and after the 4-5th time it's random-fuckingly recognized out of fucking nowhere; I didn't change shit.
- crashes (blue screen and freezes) multiple times during the installation, multiple retries and suddenly it works(?!)
- it took about 10 minutes (!!!!!!!) to install 10+ drivers for an iPod and an external hdd:
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done
Installing seagate drivers... Done
Installing Apple iPod drivers... Done

WHY INSTALL THOSE FUCKERS 5 FUCKING TIMES?!

- iTunes installation fails multiple times without error code (unknown error occured, restoring to original state...),just said fuck it and clicked the shortcut after the ***th fail and it works just like this, THANKS FOR NOTIFYING ME (NOT)!
- iTunes has to restore the entire ipod, this was done with iTunes in the store I bought it already, thanks for nothing.
-restore takes 30+ minutes?!
-syncs the iPod 3 times afterwards.

*clicks close button*
*are you sure you want to quit? Sync in progress*
*oh shit, cancels*
*itunes quits*
*?!?!?*

*tries to import media library*
*seagate hdd suddenly not detected*

I'm fucking tired of this bullshit, windows and iTunes can go die in a fucking corner after getting ass raped while their genitals are being scraped off layer by fucking layer and dipped into fucking acid.

AARRGH, 20 mins of blindness and frustration

arr.length vs arr.length()

But i don't want to get up.😴

Cool, I found a bug in Ruby!
And it’s preventing my debugging from working!
Asjfkladfsj

It’s 2:30am and I want to finish this crap.

No, I’m not doing any work tomorrow. I’m taking the day off to sleep.

It's Monday morning and I'm already tired

Final exam !!
No time for coding :/

Fell asleep with my hand on the keyboard and woke up a few hours later. There was many thousands of newlines in my code.

This has been said countless times before me, and way better than me that’s supper tired, but I need to rant out

And what I’m ranting out today, is Apple. Its essence, its core, the reason it still exists: the ECOSYSTEM!

The problem with Apple ecosystem is that it’s the ecosystem of a fucking PRISON!

People like it because it works well together , but it’s sure that in a prison, the path from your cell to the cantine is pretty optimized; you get forced there! And you might try to get your food elsewhere, but the walls of the prison are made to be difficult to cross. Especially on mobile, where they’re making it harder and harder to escape, to make a jailbreak (pun-intended). Keeping you the loyal little sheep, or the forcing you to it.

That prison is also made private, a little club, to attract people to it. They even got their own little system to talk to each other, but oh god protect them from their little messages to pass the walls of the prison.

And all that prison is guarded by the warden, watching from high in the cloud. Forcing you to report yourself to him to be part of that prison.

That prison, also, can only be entered with specific vehicles, provided by the prison, to ensure maximum compatibility and efficiency. Good luck entering with a disguised vehicle if you find the official ones too pricey for their parts.

They also provided pressure tubes to send things from one cell to another. While being only simple pressure tubes like any other, they’re acclaimed because they’re apparently easier to use than the other 3rd party pressure tubes that can send things to the outside. Why? Because, oh yes it’s already in everybody’s cells (of that prison, outside is dangerous) and the other tubes have been conveniently being placed somewhere harder to reach.

Another thing they have are those windows that can view the outside. While being maybe less clear than some other windows, they are ok. But if you ever consider going mobile to enjoy that safari with lions, then man do they love bringing you back to that window.

Ok so I’m done with the prison metaphor, or I won’t sleep.

The ecosystem is probably the major reason Apple is still there. You buy from there because you’re a prisoner (I guess I’m not finished with the metaphor after all).

This is a prime example of RMS’s quote “If the user doesn’t control the software, the software controls the user”

AirDrop isn’t some sort of revolutionary tech, it uses a well established protocol that other implementations use to do the same thing. They could really easily open source the protocol and allow everyone to profit, but they won’t, because that would mean you don’t have to buy Apple.

That’s why I militate for open source, decentralized and standardized protocols. Because that way, we control the software, and it doesn’t control us.

All the things I said aren’t so bad because when you buy Apple, you make a choice. But I don’t have a choice, I am typing this on an Apple device, because I need to (I won’t elaborate on that) because of that fucking *ecosystem*

I am really tired, so half the sentences probably don’t make sense, but thanks for coming to my stupid TED talk.

I want to code, but I'm stuck here, tearing wallpapers off walls on my new apartment so I can paint the walls before moving all my stuff here

Writing bad code has its perks.

Whenever you are hungry you only have to write a few lines of code and you get some spaghetti

Ever feel like punching your monitor when things don't work? Yup, I'm right there.

Rant #1:
Why everyone and their toy cars gotta be jumping on the bed when I’m trying to sleep?

Rant #2:
For months now, I get bleary eyed and tired every time I look at work. Focusing and being productive is almost impossible. I’m cheery and alert, then sit down, open my editor, and find I can’t focus. Moments later I feel like I need a nap.

Rant #3:
I get interrupted an average of every 3-5 minutes, basically every day, all day long. The more this happens, the more tired and angry I become. I often have to resort to yelling, throwing toys that appear on my desk/keyboard, and blasting loud music I don’t want to hear through noise canceling headphones.

—————

Is it any wonder I can’t focus or think or do anything but feel like I’m falling asleep? Is it any wonder I’m perpetually angry and frustrated?

I can sort of fix the interruptions by locking myself away in my monster’s room. But I’m still so tired and bleary and can’t focus. I don’t know what to do, or even what I can do. Vacation didn’t help. Another would doubtlessly be just as effective, and certainly wouldn’t improve my boss’s view of my performance.

Ugh.

Me: take care of yourself, people. Physical and mental health is more important than your work.
Also me: I stay up late to get everything done, wanting to prove myself. I try to please people, work longer than I know I should, and am watching out more for others than I do for myself.

May the programming gods let me sleep tonight, instead of bombarding me with more ideas...

On call this week, so I answered the phone when it rang, because it's my d job, but WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU CALLING ME AT 0410 MY TIME WHEN MY COWORKER IS ON THE CLOCK AT 0710 HIS TIME AND HE'S ABLE TO TAKE THE CALL?! You didn't need me. It was the same issue as yesterday, BUT I DIDN'T FIX A DAMN THING. It resolved itself. The "customer" you had on the phone to work with me to resolve the issue didn't need to be called either, just the application dev. Stop calling people who don't need to be awake just because we were the ones on the call when it self-resolved and none of us know what's going on.

Just noticed that I've been swapping the error and success messages for the past hour.... Yeah I should really go to bed now..

Mid-Friday: Boss: Start programming this application.
Me: Cool, how will it be setup? what lang-
Boss: Everything's already setup, just start programming in PHP. Check in and make sure it's done by Wednesday morning before 9.
Mid-Tuesday:
Me: Cool, it's done. Had some trouble with connecting our database to the clients, some permissions were conflicting.
Boss: Now I need you to pull it, publish it to our other azure portal, change it to ASP.NET Core 2.1 MVC and install it to teams. Also change the database to MySQL.
Me: I thought everything was already setup.
Boss: things change.
Me: Cool.
*Pulls an all nighter*
Me: Something isn't right...
Wednesday
Me*hasn't slept yet*: It's done.
Boss: Why do you look so tired?
Me: I was working last night
Boss: Well you shouldn't do that.
Me: The deadline is today. only way it was going to get done before 9 was to do it last night.
Boss: Doesn't matter.
9am Meeting:
Boss: it was easy, no hassle, it's up and running.
Me: no hassle?

I'm getting so fucking tired of frontend development...

I still like part of it, but I really hate CSS, browser compatibility, stupid users, dumb requests from product owners and fucking weird designs. And to top it all, it's the frontend team that handles all the pressure when the deadline comes up and the project's late, even if it was the product/design/whatever phase that took too much time.

Being a frontend developer is very stressful and has so many annoyances and I'm getting sick of it.

My company's been promising giving me some backend work because there are some backend-heavy projects coming up and they know I have the skills, but they just keep giving me frontend work. Also, one of our frontend developers is on leave, which means more work for the rest of us.

Why did I ever decided to do frontend development?

So.... We spend most our lives learning languages and methodologies and best practices and all that crap while depriving ourselves of sleep because the rules said if we did that we'd make something cool and have fun doing it...

But then *any company here* comes along and says make this shitty feature in *arbitrary time here* for our stupid *product here*.
You do it working overtime and sacrificing quality to have the client say afterwards that he wants something different (from his own specs).

And then the circle repeats...

I should consider a different profession...
Hey plants don't speak... Maybe I'll be a gardener!
Clip here clip there - done. I'll be a happy fucking script

Time flies, one minute you're starting a project at 11PM and finally​ ready to sleep...at 5.45AM

You know that feeling when you're "on the zone"

'I work in IT'

Most common way to describe every developers job.

A bruised arm and shoulder and 2 nights of crappy sleep later, I was finally tired enough today to consistently try to type 'console.log()' in PHP code in order to debug stuff. Good night devRant, and may the weekend come soon.

Tired, sick, brain foggy, cold.

I’m trying to finish my last few specs and it totally isn’t going well.

My PM also promised me he would get the change requests for this ticket to me by today so I could work on them — as we’re moving this Friday. He did not. He made the same promise last week. Bloody useless.

Oh well.
I let him know that I wouldn’t be able to finish the feature in time if he didn’t get back to me, so... week off? :D

As if packing and moving and driving is downtime.

I do need to figure out this last spec, though. I rewrote the entire feature, and broke functionality specific to some client, and apparently it’s tricky and extremely fragile. I have no idea how it was working before, and the only person I have to ask is... grumpy and overly busy, and hasn’t looked at any of it in years. Yay!

I might just go to bed.

How does it feel to do a 15-days project in 20 hours, by non-stop working on it?
Ask me!

#tired

The last several weeks I've been coding at 100%, most all day and well into the night. Today, I just can't.

Things I have done today:

*Watched Netflix.

*Walked around outside a bit.

*Let my 18 month old daughter type all over my code

* Closed mysterious dialogs and menus daughter opened up that I couldn't open if I tried

*Watched the Mets score 10 runs on the Phillies in the top of the 5th inning

*Browsed devRant

*Stared at stuff

* Cleaned up a few thousand emails out of my inbox

* Added filters to never see them again

* Noted impending deadlines on the calendar

* Stared at more stuff

In the meantime so many more ideas have come flooding in on how to proceed with these various features I'm working on. Can't even run from work.

So, no such thing as laziness, because apparent laziness is also productive. The exhaustion becomes doubly frustrating because there's just no way to physically keep up with the breakthroughs.

I'm still just staring out the window. It's raining now. Today is done.

One of my theoretical CS teachers always complains and makes it sound like everything around him is an annoyance to his existence
- being late or in a bad mood? His pregnant wife is very tiring (good ol' haha women are hormonal much?)
- having to create and correct exercises for us (students) is a nuisance because it's so much work and we're not supposed to be spoon-fed (which makes the whole learning experience very demotivating)
- every explanation start is continued by at least 3 changes in the explanation itself, which makes everything super-confusing
- all his helpers are incompetent and not rising up to his expectations

Someone needs some self-reflection

I am so off my game today that I accidentally rewrote the String.IfNullOrWhiteSpace extension method in C# because I forgot it existed.

My extension had a better name tho: String.IfItAintNoThang

So it's 11:32,
I can't wait to go to bed, finished development for the day but then my boss sez can you make a sketch up of how the building plans for the app would look?
Me:🙂

Didn't sleep well.. now i'm constantly phasing out in front of my editor.

I just looked 5 mins straight at the word "readonly" until I came back to life and completely lost track of what I was doing.

Going to sleep a bit now..:D

Look at the image first, please.

Me: "What's that?"
Closed devRantron.
"Hmm, still there."
Closed browser.
"Nope, that wasn't it neither."
Closed everything that is somehow connected to the internet: FTP client, SSH connections, even the VM.
"There's still something! What is it?!"
Bashed my head against the wall.
"I am listening to music right now... music from the NAS..."

I want to be in the terminal, but I don't want to do work. So I type:

brew install cowsay

Now, I have cowsay. This buys me an hour of entertainment.

This is literally me all the time, :P

Today I have spent 2 hours trying o figure out why my code wasn't executing at all.
It was a typo.
"assFields" instead of "addFields".
I need sleep.

Let's work on my my side project after work.
Oh, a cold beer
Oh, Netflix
Oh, it's past dinner time.
Fuck

-Code all day at college
-Get home to rest
-Bored
-Back to coding all night

This is a rant about having nothing to rant about because I'm so busy working on projects. The grind is just... grind-y.

Story time!

Like I mentioned in a previous rant, I’m (or was) a coca-cola addict. Coca-cola has caffeine, right?

This happened a tuesday. I forgot my mug at home (I wanted to draw it a bat🦇) so I bought a jumbo coffee at a store near my office. I drank it, and then, all my partners went to the kitchen for coffee. I went with them and I refilled my cup.

I was working on my code, and suddenly I felt a strange sensation on my chest (I don’t think I could describe it, it feels like when you have intestinal problems and gases, but in the chest). I didn’t give it importance. One hour later I started trembling. I googled my symptoms and I found I had a coffee overdose 😱 But how? I drank a lot of caffeine in soda, but this only happened to me with coffee. This lasted 5 hours 😓

You, specially the most experienced devs and coffee addicts, how can I drink more than 1 cup of coffe per day without trembling? Btw, I have no heart or pressure problems, so I don’t know... this happened because I don’t drink much coffee?

That moment when you struggle and write an amazing backend logic and your manager only looks at the frontend/UI and tells you it is okay. The struggle doubles when you try and explain him the backend logic and he just ignores you...what a day!!(No offense to amazing frontend developers out there)

So many nights....

I think I need another one

Being a programmer for a while now it always irritates me to try to explain what I'm working on to friends and family. I forget what I knew before I developed. I'm always like "I made the strings in the database- oh I mean the words...well they're actually more like strings of letters- well anyway I made a code to sanitize the user input- I mean make it so it is secure before uhhh saving." I spend so much time watering what I'm saying down I forget what I'm talking about

It's not even funny. It'd be funny if one single person in my family or friend group understood what I meant to some degree.

I just did the equivalent of (it's actually a lot longer, this is psuedocode):
Color bg = Color.argb(
mColor.getAlpha(),
mColor.getRed(),
mColor.getGreen(),
mColor.getBlue()
);

god im tired…

Dear brain, could u please work?

"No you motherfugging arsehole, scratch the sand out of your vagina and make yourself your own processor. Fuck u."

Seems like it's the jolly season of "my brain is uncooperative and unwilling".

It's 2.30 a.m. here. Had a very emotionally bad day and I don't feel like sleeping now. Fuck you emotions!! :(
I guess I could enjoy the silence at least... and devRant

I am currently powered by Lo-Fi hip hop and literally nothing else

Warning: long rant

I'm sick and tired of feeling like I'm the only person who cares about their privacy

I try, as much as I can, to avoid surveillance. I use firefox, protonmail, duckduckgo, e2e encrypted chat platforms, avoid social media like the plague, and do everything I can to block facebook and google trackers on websites I visit

And it's exhausting

Each search I make means I waste another 30 seconds because duckduckgo doesn't pull the answer directly from webpages like google does

I get weird looks when I give people a @protonmail email address, and I have to explain what it is to them every fucking time

People ask if I have social media, and I either give them nothing or my Github account

And for what? Nobody else cares, no matter how much I explain how toxic google and facebook are to society.

They just say 'I have nothing to hide' as they scroll Instagram, letting Zuckerberg build an intimately detailed profile on them.

They just say 'so what' as they google memes from their chrome browser, allowing google to share that information with god-knows-who

If everyone else has given up their privacy for convenience, why am I still fighting a losing battle?

It feels like I'm fighting a war against big tech by myself, and I'm tired and about to lay down my arms

Anyone else feels like the Weekend sometimes gets u more tired then the week itself?

Do you guys still work on your personal project after work or just to tired/burned-out when you get home?

I've been asked to work a Sunday next weekend; and like an idiot I agreed. Wasting a beautiful summer day inside designing software for a company to push more fast food product and contribution to obesity and diabetes in the world.

This is my life, and I hate it here. I hate this industry. In my 15 years, I once took off for 11 months and lived out of two bags through Asia and Europe. I spent 5 months with just a car driving across America. It's fun, but non-sustainable and I had to find a job afterwards both times.

I need a way out of this cycle. I need to contact professors and get letters of recommendation and get into a PhD program (I have a masters already), but finding the time after exhausting days at work is .. well .. exhausting.

The most I can do after work is go hang out with friends or do something, but if I come straight home, I just fall asleep. I'm tired all the time.

3:40 in the morning... Finally set up most of the basic of Arch with i3. Been more than 12 hours... My eyes r dying... And so m I... Kinda swollen arteries near side of the head coz of overload...
And I have college tomorrow... Or today... Watever 😭😭😭

That alarm name! I dread my daily life. :(

I swear I almost had a nervous breakdown today.

Advisor at college has told me I won't be graduating until Feb 2019, I'll be 29 with a degree in IT and my minor in software engineering. I feel like I'm just playing catch up to the younger crowd who got there sooner.

On top of that all the entry level programming jobs I applied to have rejected me on the basis of not having my degree yet. They're impressed with my work but they want me out of school. I have to wait it out until I'm closer to graduating.

On good days when I code Java web applets love what I do and I wouldn't have it different, but on days like today I feel like shit and wonder if my degree was worth it, especially when I factor in that my degree only went up to pre-calc on the math end. (I'm thinking of majoring in a masters in CS as a way to makeup, maybe)

I'm frustrated and I feel the same kind of loneliness when I graduated HS. I know there's a light at the end but some days it's just hell.

I'm sure a lot of you have gone through this. Any ideas to destress?

Note to self:

Next time, don't write your assembler in python. And using a file as a buffer for your graphics driver probably wasn't the best idea either.

Question to all you web developers out there: how do you survive long term in this job without going nuts? I have been working in this industry for almost 7 years and feelings of frustration have accumulated, to the point where I honestly feel like laying g bricks as a job would be more rewarding. Here are the main reasons why:

1) The fact that your job is never "finished" and it looks like and endless stream of tasks. Either the project has money being rolled in or is pretty much dead. Ever changing requirements ensure that most of what you do will be rewritten in 6 months or so. This is ok for the most part, but overtime it does give you the feeling that most of your effort was wasted, and you have the same website/app to show for it, slightly different...

2) The never ending churn of tech, particularly in the Javascript/node ecosystem. Sure, there is a good side of learning new approaches of doing things and it brings variety, but there is the dark side that you never feel you are getting better at doing your job, as every new project does not look anything like the previous. Even if all the stack pieces are the same (never happens), everyone sets it up and organises the project differently enough that you have to spend loads of time solving things you have done before. This makes it difficult to get a sense that you are mastering something...

So, if autonomy, purpose, and mastery are the keys to fulfilling work, I find this career lacking in mastery and purpose...does anyone feels/felt the same? How did you counter it?

You know you're really tired when you type Rooms.ass

Wrote a small code to test my "Reset Password" feature, service console kept printing: User not found and returns 404

I was 100% I added that user manually to the database....

Well it turned out I added that user to the wrong database. I need to sleep T_T

I'm so tired.
Got enough sleep but tired nevertheless every day.

Situation in the company isn't helping, would really like to get a review as I'm really close to a 'final' version for productive use, none given.
Didn't think far enough and didn't include various OO-things when starting to program this application, so I had to rewrite lots of it. It certainly got better by the time but as it's a grown structure I'd feel happier if someone other than me had seen and cursed the code.
Coworker that has most experience in C# only once implemented something with multiple threads, couldn't help me there.
Could not test the code yet because the hardware was inaccessible and is now potentially broken.
I really like working independently, nevertheless I feel a little bit lost at sea - I can deal with that, but it's exhausting.
Also, trying to get an answer from the colleague who should act as my supervisor whether or not I can work remotely during a CS related course in the semester break for > 2 weeks now. Course admission is the mid of January so I'd like to have an answer this year so I can repeat the basics I'll need if necessary.
Also, Midterm is coming.

It's a lot of little things piling up right now I wouldn't mind if there were only 1-2 of them.
I'm just so damn tired.
I'll go to sleep now.

(In happy news: my internet connection is working pretty decent now, technician that fucked it up apologized and said that he probably needs glasses, he misread the connection number. :D)

Sometimes I get into high places...

Why do theoretical computer science and maths lectures mostly start at 8 am. I am a nocturnal creature to me is like having to wake up at 3 am for others. There are other kinds of people that like to get up early so here is a suggestion: Why don't we agree that all lectures start at 11:00 earliest? It is a good time in the day for a lot of people and I would have the time to inject myself with some Mate tea.

Why ? Why is there no time left for the cool stuff? Spending too much time at work - beeing tired- bought a new rasp-pi - it's already 1 year old - untouched @ home ... just why?

had holidays ... spent 4 days of 7 to recover - just slept.

Dev: "presenting my privacy-focused XYZ app!"

App: is 100% online despite features I could build in fucking bash, has integration with 3 other sites

Me: [x] Doubt

Rant r = new Rant(Rant.TEAM_PROBLEM);

Three months ago, a senior, one year older than me, decided to join me in doing startups. He said he's good at finance stuff (his parents are fund managers), and he is interested in startups just like I am. He treated me very nicely, so I gladly accepted him.

I'm currently working on many projects, and some of them won me quite a few awards, most notably on the national competition. I also got invited into startup incubator programs, met some awesome people and offered free scholarships at universities in my country.

He frankly said he joined because he wanted to learn about startups and have those "privileges" too, and I'm cool with that.

Anyway, the problem is that I'm the one doing all the work. He's really nice, doesn't claim anything whatsoever, but the thing is he doesn't have any skills whatsoever except soft skills like communicating. So, I'm horribly tired from working alone.

My tasks mostly involves full-stack development, such as planning the specs, designing and developing frontend for mobile apps and progressive webapps, developing microservices for the backend, up to deploying and maintaining the servers. It's a lot of work for a single person to handle in such a short timeframe.

Not only that, but I'm also the one handling the business/marketing part, albeit I'm still learning. From doing paperworks, pitches, business models, up to creating advertising materials for the product.

I'm obviously not the smart ones like the people out there, but I keep focusing on improving my skills.

So, he said he could help me, and I let him try. What did you think he did?

He made pitch decks using default fucking PowerPoint themes, shooted a demo video with his phone cam in 320p potato resolution and expect me to "add some effects", gives me loads of requirements when all we needed was a simple feature, copying and pasting prior documents in my paperworks which doesn't make any fucking sense at all, and quite a lot more.

Also, he said I should stay in the developer zone only while he maintains the business, whilist he obviously can't do much in the business part either. Seriously...?

I'm okay with his lack of experience, considering he's nice and all, unlike the other business guys I've met in the previous rants. However, I keep questioning myself why he is here in the first place when I'm the one doing everything anyway.

What should I do? Maybe just keep him and recruit more experienced people to join us, as he's not that much of a burden? What do you devRanters think?

Thanks for reading, fellow devRanters! 😀

I'm shit tired of dealing with people. Especially on online. I wish I can live a life without internet.

No shit, Sherlock!

Have to finish this code today but only slept four hours last night, coffee isn't working anymore, making the most stupid mistakes and constantly dreaming away while looking at my screen because I can't focus anymore. Also, it's around 25 degrees here and the vents aren't working that great... fml.

I think its time to go to bed 😐
Edit: i forgot to attach the image
Edit 2: Where the fuck is the picture
Edit 3: You cant edit a rant to add a picture in devRantron, check comments for picture.

Damn it gitpush focus when type the damn password!! I locked my self out of my server again 😭

Time to visit the portal and login 😒

// Tired as fuck adventures, yay

I was once coding and researching for a school project, it was around 1AM (yeah, I'm a pussy that needs to sleep at 12AM, otherwise I'm useless all the day long) and a friend was with me, he was doing another stuff.

Suddenly, out of the blue, he asks me "Hey, how much is 12 multiplied by 430?", so I say "Let me check", press Win+R, type "notepad", enter, write operation and wait looking at the screen.

"why this does not work?" I thought for some seconds until I realized I fucking typed in notepad and not in the calculator.

Just laughed my ass off and went straight to sleep. Until today, my friend thinks I'm deranged.

When I'm too tired and just want to get rid of obligations:
I write down 3 to 5 most important things I need to get done. Then I put myself on autopilot.

while(true){
while(beTired()==true){
goRelax();
}
while(beBored()==true){
goProgram();
}
}

That's a fucking infinite loop

Who doesn't already deleted a DB from production server because tought that is deleting it from localhost's Phpmyadmin? Yeah, shit happens...
.
.
.
It seems less shitty when you have a backup of it from last 9mins, but sucks as well...

This week has not been fun. I worked 12-14h everyday, slept 4h, felt like a zombie. It's 3pm and I still have 8 tasks to go.

The piece of software I'm working on at my job just feels fucking stupid and brainless right now. I know it is not, I know it's working, I know it'll be actually useful to its users but I don't feel like that.
I usually go by telling myself "Most of the time I do like what I do, but sometimes it's just work that has to be done" - but for the last month or so it felt like my motivation is completly drained and not coming back fast enough. Just thinking about it feels like desperate, tired crawling on Legos.

On the other hand, at least I've got some motivation for my studies back which feels great.

I feel like I have started to grasp the very essence of software development
For 2 weeks now, I have either slept 3-1.30 hours per night or not at all
And I can't drink coffee without spending 2 hours in toilet after each cup
FUCK😣

Donkey dog = new Monkey();

Goal: Making this a valid logical statement.

Spent 10 minutes trying to work out why my code didn’t work only to find I’m uploading it to the wrong site!

Have somewhat of a headache but I still want to work on some stuff so I started using f.lux and it's so much easier on my eyes than having the full on blue light burning my eyes out. Any one else using f.lux here?

You need at least 5 hours of sleep
Coffee: "No."

OMG! I just entered my address in a Email Address field... I need coffee!

I'm so tired, I tried to push code to GrubHub.

It’s late, and stupid RSpec has decided to only mock calls to a particular method in some specs but not in others.

`allow(object).to receive(:method).with(resource_arg).and_return(“some\ntext”)`

Works in a few specs, but not the rest. Why? Who the fuck knows. Probably some shared state between specs that isn’t supposed to happen.

HAHA JUST KIDDING

After refactoring my specs to use unique ‘resource’ names for each call because I’ve had shared state issues before.

and after refactoring my model code to remove a lot of now-unused dependency injection (because maybe it was mocking a different object than got passed in?)

Guess what?
When creating my mock objects, I forgot to link them together. That’s it. A 14-character change. And suddenly they all pass.

Asdjklfajg.
Time for bed.

Does anyone just feel tired, in general? Like the boss is (usually) alright. I like the work and I am good at it. Maybe I'm not feeling challenged enough? Honestly, I'm not sure. In the last retro, I was an 8.5/10 on the happiness index, now I'm a 4...wtf

Rant

I'm tired of this shit!!!

First I receive a task to create a new functionality for the app that I'm working on and some documentation (this is the only good part of all the rant) but no design.

It's been 2 weeks since I got assigned to this and still no design, no assets, no API calls that ACTUALLY WORK.

Today was testing a plist to get a banner link, and for 1 hour that little fucker didn't returned the image I was asking.

Better, I wasn't getting ANY IMAGE. Turns out that the link sends me to a HTML URL that doesn't have any image... go figure!

So I've been working on this from some images inside the PDF with the documentation given.

Oh! Wait! There's more!

The cherry on top is that I'm implementing a chat/voice call/video call into the app and the framework that I will be using is being created now, and it's not even finished!!!!!!

That feeling when they don't understand something, yet you know that no matter how much you explain about it they still wouldn't understand...

My heart can only take so much torture...

Anyone else get quite burnt out even after, like, 4 hours of programming? I usually feel like a zombie and can't think properly. Will this eventually stop happening?

Was in a meeting with the execs and the boss singles me out and asks me where is this functionality at. I told him the dev working on it will have it ready today. He goes no no no this needs to happen now. I am speechless have no idea how to tell him this employees are working very hard and is doing the very best with the limited time we had. I personally was up at midnight coding to deliver on time. That was the start of my bad day ... crap just pilled on :/

I'm tired 😴

The floor is Not Getting Shit Done Before Deadline

Forget it, I'm too tired to even rant right now.

When you've been slinging divs all day and can't get that image to center, and finally you type "text-align: center" and think, yeah okay, I think I'm done for the day...

... And then the image centers.

💣💥

Colleagues cannot seem to grasp that allowing a user to manually update a field via an Api, that only business process should update is a bad idea.

The entire team of around 10 'software developers' cannot grasp that just because the frontend website won't set it doesn't mean its secure. I have tried many times now...

Just an example honestly... Our project follows a concrete repository pattern using no interfaces or inheritance, returning anaemic domain models (they are just poco) that then get mapped into 'view models' (its an api). The domain models exist to map to 'view models' and have no methods on them. This is in response to my comments over the last 2 years about returning database models as domain transfer objects and blindly trusting all Posts of those models being a bad idea due to virtual fields in Ef.

Every comment on a pull request triggers hours of conversation about why we should make a change vs its already done so just leave it. Even if its a 5 minute change.

After 2 years the entire team still can't grasp restful design, or what the point is.

Just a tiny selection of constant incompetence that over the years has slowly warn me down to not really caring.

I can't really understand anymore if this is normal.

I'm unmotivated and tired today. I'm just running tests in different branches to see what bug I can find... and since the testing take 5 minutes to complete, I just watch videos in between...

I'm so tired I just wrote
background-color: round;
and I still have homework…

still happy though, I just got my first domain!

Working on a Xamarin (.Net) project in the morning, in the evening I work on React Native project. And a little time at night with Java side project, also sometimes I do some support to a native Android App.

God, this is like a brain gym !

My cat represents me so well

During Summer I'm tired because it's too hot.

Now it's getting cold, it's getting harder to get out of bed...

And the heater makes me tired too...

Plus there's the not going out or, moving as much... Which may also be due to being tired.

And well in general, I seem to not feel like doing anything lately... Because I'm tired....

Seems like my routine is consolidating to: sleep, eat, work...

And if I had a choice it would just be sleep...

I need to get out of bed now so can eat and go work..... But I don't wanna.....

Is it just me? Any tips to break the cycle?

Need two needles, two infusion hoses and 5 - 10 l of coffee.

The blood must go, the caffeine get in instead.

And yeah. This sounds fantastical in my brain right now, as I'm literally drooling half asleep in front of the PC.

It's 16 o clock in germany and I have gotten done nothing.

And I think I should put on some baby bips or the keyboard fries from drool.

You know you might need a vacation/take PTO when the sales associate at Target says “damn girl you look tired” (and you do because you stayed up until 4 am coding trying to figure how to get videos to display on full screen on click [and after realizing that iOS doesn’t recognize the fullscreen API]) .

Step 1: It is at least 1am, I am reasonably tired.
Step 2: I figure I need to be productive at some point.
Step 3: Browse random websites until the end of time (probably 20m of nonsense)
Step 4: Suddenly I'm super motivated to actually get something done, slapping some music on and starting to work until I fall straight into bed.

Good days.
Seriously, the thing that motivates me the most is probably music.

My life has been pretty rough this week regarding personal life context, but at least my pull requests are being approved and having good comments, which is nice.

Like who the hell invented that work days start at 8 am? Can people actually concentrate from the moment they arrive at work? For me it is 9 am till I get some work done

For 20 minutes, I was trying to figure out why my wrapper for 'multiSet' was buggy

Recently I have lots of very unproductive days. I m just very tired and even coffee puts me to sleep at work. What's interesting is that as soon as I open something interesting on the web or start working on some new component it all goes away for an hour or so.

So I just wanted to ask you if you have weeks like this.

How can I get myself fixed :(

I hate when I it's night, I have ideas/want to work on my projects or study, but I'm way too tired..
I can't work, because I will only develop new bugs
I can't study, because I can't receive information anymore
And I can't fucking sleep either because I am constantly thinking about how much I WANT to do.

Absolutely hate it...

goto

Found it lying around. Googled it, and it seems people avoid it, so I started using it all over the place(s). goto b

a:
no other places to goto exit

b:
Yes, it does require some thought to avoid confusion, and some pull requests get declined, but... Helps me alot when I have goto a

:exit

Ok. Third coffee doesn't work appearntly. Anyone has any fix?

So after a pretty packed day of family time, DIY, play dates and parenting, I managed to squeeze in a couple of hours of game dev... now to get up in 6 hours to go to work.

Online school has left me completely exhausted and unmotivated

Couldn't save a file because it showed me that this file is opened somewhere else. So I go to the resource monitor to check for its handlers, but only explorer.exe showed in list. I restart explorer and get back to the code. For the first time..... for the first time in my life I hoped that this won't work. I press Ctrl+S, andddd, file was saved.

So, basically, windows's explorer can lock files. Nice job Microsoft. Nice job.

Does anyone else ever get so distracted/tired/pent up with other shit going on that they become a liability?

Last night I had about 5 hours sleep and have been worried over general UK politics lately.

Today, on a phone call to get support over getting locked out of our Apple Developer Program account, the call centre agent asked if we had the password.

I immediately replied "Sure! It's **begins saying actual password allowed over the phone**

Anyone else have a background in something unrelated to their current job? I have an MA in religion and public life, got a job as a test analyst and slowly ended up maintaining assets for our apps. Some days I feel very inspired and lucky I got into this industry, and some days I feel totally out of place. I don't know if I should just throw myself into it, study more on my own and make myself comfortable here or just move on and go back to grad school or something.

8 days till end of contract.
Let’s hope nobody nice want to hire me for at least a month.
I need vacation badly.

The feeling when you didn't spot what the error was here:

int x = 0;
int y = 0;

for ( ; y < rows; y++) {
for ( ; x < cols; x++) {
//Dafuq, only does one line?!
}
}

Ah, the internal struggle.

Half an hour of debugging to find out why my code wasn't being called multiple times inside setInterval().

Only to realised that I was using setTimeout() instead of setInterval().

This is what depression and tiredness does to people.

Random thoughts that I need to put somewhere. that I’ve been holding in and have to get out.

I feel like I’m more welcomed and wanted here than in real life. My friends don’t really think about me when making plans anymore, no one really thinks of me in general.

In school I was the awkward kid that was nice to everyone and I’m not taking the whole graduation well. I miss high-school and my vocational school, I miss my friends and I’ve just felt like things ended too soon and I just kinda feel alone

I wish I could just sit down and program and not procrastinate the only time I seem to be able to get stuff done is when I force myself. I feel like I’m such a shitty developer for not fighting it better. I need to be better.

I’ve not had a good few weeks. Since I’m taken a semester off from college no one in my family besides me is able to stay with a family member that’s in the hospital. I volunteered because I care for them deeply and want to help them. but it takes a huge toll on me since I have to be the one that listens to the doctors tells the rest of my family what’s happening. While Im kinda freaking out because I’m scared and nervous and NOT READY and I’ve had to stay a week there and I’ve been having to stay on and off and I haven’t really told anyone how I really am feeling about it all because I don’t like to be vulnerable in front of people and it’s been really hard and taking a toll and not helping the procrastination.

I'm very tired.

That's it. That's all I wanted to say. -v-

I've been a frontend engineer at 6 companies for the last 10 years. Both big and small companies currently at the largest I've ever worked for. I'm totally over it. Maybe burnt out is the term. I have zero motivation to do any work or coding. I'm not a lazy person. I love working, solving problems, learning new things. I'm just sick of what I do. I used to love following all the newest tech trends, following devs on twitter, checking hacker news and creating side projects. Now I feel like my job has lost all that joy and excitement. I work remote and have been for the past 3 years. I wonder how much of that, not having any social feedback and interaction around the job has attributed to me feeling like this. All the JS frameworks suck. PR reviews, process, requirements; I'm just tired of everything. Has anyone else experienced this? If so, what did you do? Were you able to find the passion for programming again?

I want to code but i'm soooooo much tired 😭
Happens all the time

It's only Monday. Why do i feel so tired. T_T

Today's work:
- 3hrs check point meeting on Project A
- quick API fix, testing and dev assistance on Project A
- prelive deployment of Module B
- code review and enhancements for Script C
- prelive deployment and testing for Script C

When your so tired your giving what you don't have... And boss won't care...

When you get this great idea at 2 am, code it out and the next day you wonder why you even bother to be a developer

When it’s Friday afternoon and you don’t want to work anymore after a loooong week in your web agency...

Caption : your communication is dickhead ? We have a team of cocks !

I trying to stop worrying about my project at work and get some sleep.
Letting these thoughts go and relaxing the mind isn't that easy when your roommates are seemingly still wide awake and unaware of your struggles with the new CAD-tool.

Im off of 3 hours sleep right now after getting lost down the rabbit hole of debugging.

I was just putting stock on the shelves at my job and a customer came up to me and asked me where something was. I thought of two places it could be so i said:

"if item == aisle4
{print("You've found it"); }
else if item == aisle6
{print("You've found it"); }
else
{print ("Im unsure where it is sorry"); }"

She just looked at me and my coworker told her where the item was, once she left my coworker started laughing at me and called me the biggest nerd he knew.

You know what was the problem?
I missed a semicolon on the previous line.;

That sensation......
After ~12 consecutive hours of coding to complete a task.
you feel it for about 10seconds immediately before crashing on bed.
It's short but it's awesome.

So many Ideas... So many projects... And no energy to apply...
Gonna take a few days off my inventions, If i can...

I hate nodejs but it seems like the best way to control GPIO on a raspberry pi from a webserver

!rant

Wrote an literal assload of stored procedures for my DB.
Got introduced to Enitity Framework.
My brain just exploded with rainbows and possibilities :D

Not to mention it feels so much cleaner :v

I just worked on server stuff for so long I feel like I can speak bash and nginx config better than english

Had to fix all bugs of my colleague this night because our client was not happy.
Before he joined us he worked as a database admin and now he wants to learn web dev and coding. But he did so bad mistakes like endless loops or requesting api 5 times.
In so tired now, happy when its christmas

Very tired lately, also not very hungry ... And when I am hungry the food just doesn't taste like it used to 🤔 anyone had something lik this and maybe some tips on how to battle this?!

Netflix but no chill!

At what moment do you realize you need to stop coding? Mine is when the code starts bleeding together. Like when I start putting config file information into my methods, which I ended up doing tonight. 😖 God it's time for pizza. 🍕

So tired from school, don't if I can finish my project.. 😴😪😵😧😱

Do you guys know the feeling when your opening PR on side project late at night..

The CI takes forever to make all the analyses and checks and you almost fall asleep because your so fucking tired?

Sometimes I feel like squidward, when nothing wants to work.

Hopefully, tomorrow's a better day

Was installing Arch linux in dual boot with Windows and I fucked up.
Now I can't boot back into Windows. I tried to restore the boot 'thing' and I wasn't able to.
So tomorrow I will have to reinstall every single program I had since Microsoft doesn't make installed softawared recoverable.
P.S. This is the 4th time I try to install Arch without success (had problems with the bootloader, kde and gpu drivers and ended up bricking the os) but I'm still going to try until I get it to work. Why? Because I hate my life.

I'm so PISSED OFF because of all the problem fixing I do. Most of the time, I take tutorials which have 6 steps a and 10 lines of code plus some config, and ALWAYS there is a problem somewhere, where it hasn't been covered in the guide. WHAT THE FLAMING FUCK? I literally spend days after days to figure out, that it's a problem with mostly one file/value, and no goddamn guide ever mentions the dependencies, if you don't have the defaults set for somewhat reason. And it's like this with every motherfucking tutorial I do to implement something, and most of the time I do understand what I'm doing, but THAT ONE VALUE/TRICK/FILE/SETTING/XML TAG/CODE TO A NUCLEAR SILO IS NEVER MENTIONED, WHY?!?!

linux mint got wasted and rekt today. in a few hours, we have managed to install git, ssh, terminator and teamviewer. everything failed except for teamviewer. wowie,, i need more time to learn how git works tbh. we tried and tried and fucking tried over and over again until the terminaL WONT TYPE IN WHAT IM TYPING LIKE WHY ARE U REFUSING TO OBEY ME NOW KEYBOArd. the worst part is that i cant even SHUT DOWN because i cant even click on shut down. i had to force it using virtualbox. oh wellll, get ready linux.....

tomorrow is another day!

I am a web app developer by profession and software engineer by qualifications but when there is a problem with router, firewall or a server needs to be setup, whether internal or for client, all my employer can see is me. Sometimes i get too tired of this shit. Also I am expected to work at home during night as if I don't have any life outside this field. I need to enjoy my life with I am young. I am twenty and stuck. Fuck it.

This week was one of those weeks were it feels like it's never ending
Monday, delayed trains and the legacy project's new update went live

Tuesday, not a lot of work so I did some self study (best day of the week)

Wednesday, again train delay, and some funny little sh*t ripped the valve from my bike... I mean sure if you let the air out, haha little fun but completely removing the valve? That's just f'n low...

Thursday, the legacy project had a weird bug that I can't reproduce but has to be fixed before the end of this week...

Friday... To be continued... I hope it will be a quiet quick and easy day... 😟

I'm so tired I can't even do my personal stuff that I wanted to do instead of actually working. But I'm getting paid anyways. Working is kinda cool

Happy New Year! 🎉🎊🎉🎊

I am 2 hours early, but I'm going to bed now.

Everytime I sleep 12 hours (on a weekend) a wake-up like meh.. who am I, what is this world?

After 4 years off apprenticeship and 10 days of totally focused work I just turned in my final exam! (45 Minutes ago)

The final exam for IT professionals (here in Switzerland) is a project that you work on for ten days at your workplace.

I thought I would feel relieved in any way.

But honestly, there are only two things in my head right now:

Tiredness
And
The constant thought off what could be wrong

I AM TOO TIRED FOR EVERYTHING!

The only thing that keeps me alive for now is the music shaking my ears

So worried people will fuck things up in work when I'm not there. It's causing such tiredness and such long days. 🙇I think it's caught up with with today. No holiday leave taken for 9 months and not a day off sick. 🏳

#dingdongyouarewrongdontbeadevelopercuzudontgettosleep4-until3oclockanditshard2makemoneyholyshitiamtired

I had to get up early this morning, to write a math exam and now I'm too tired to learn for my computer-organisation exam tomorrow.
How fucking much I love that shit.