I got the offer!!!!!!

The "backend developer" has to know everything.

8 deadlines, 2 people, 1 day before the holidays

And we managed it all! 🥳🥳🥳

I am fed up working with unskilled software developers. Or to be more specific, working with people who have no idea of sofware architecture.

Most people I've worked with have simply no idea what they are doing in the broad picture, they can only follow patterns they see and implement their feature in the same way. They can't think about the abstract concepts which should be the foundation of the project.

They fail to write unit tests which are maintainable. They write one fucking test per method which is testing 50 things at the same time, making it often impossible to understand what is being tested.

They think putting stuff in private methods makes their class better and is some kind of separation of concerns.

They write classes and afterwards create interfaces for these classes named {Class}Interface, shoving all the methods into that interface. They think it's good design to do so.

They are unable to think about the reasons why things are done the way they are done and that you don't do stuff for the sake of doing stuff, but to achieve certain goals like interchangeability.

They don't undestand how to separate business logic from the application code.

They have no sense for naming things beautifully. They don't see how naming things is a major part of good software architecture.

They get layer concepts wrong and then create godlike {EntityName}Service classes, which do everything related to a particular entity.

They fail to shape the boundaries within a software project, entangling stuff which should live in individual modules.

All I want is to work in a team with professionals.

Things that still feel like they were yesterday:
- Microsoft buying Skype
- WiFi 802.11n
- USB 3.0
- Android 5.0, Material design
- Microsoft buying Nokia
- “Grid layout is an experimental technology”

Nobody even uses Skype anymore. I’m still looking for “is it support that WiFi n-word” when choosing a router. Yes it supports it. Everything that happened since 2009 supports it. Usb 3.0 was released in 2008, 12 years ago, and I’m still happy when it’s a blue connector instead of white. Android 5.0 was released 6 years ago.

I don’t understand HOW can I know that the newest but not exactly bleeding edge web specs like clamp function aren’t the newest and use them but still believe that grid layout is an experimental technology despite using it in production and FUCKING LOOKING AT CANIUSE TABLE and FUCKING THINKING THAT USB 3.0 WAS RELEASED JUST NOW while working on the laptop that FUCKING HAS TYPE C as its only port

It looks like somebody should go have his time perception module checked

Recruiter call me for a position in his company and after speaking for a while he asked me to refer him in my company 🤣

I am a fucking first year student and am doing an internship at a SHIT start-up. I've devoted my FUCKING PRECIOUS TIME into their SHIT iOS app, and the fucking boss is keeping procrastinating to get me that fucking pay cheque. For God's fucking sake that they pay me using the Canadian government's money (CSJP), FUCK YOU FUCK YOU
FUUUUUCK YOU

This should not be called wisdom teeth, should be called stupid teeth
Mother fucker is growing perpendicular.

What fuck is wrong with you bro , grow upwards you dumb fuck!!

Three months into a new job, as a senior developer (12+ years experience) and updated an import application.

With one small update query that didn't account for a possible NULL value for a parameter, so it updated all 65 million records instead of the 15 that belonged to that user.

Took 3 people and 4 days to put all the data back to it's original state.

Went right back to using the old version of the apllication, still running 2 years later. It's spaghetti code from hell with sql jobs and multiple stored procedures creating dynamic SQL, but I'm never touching it again.

Wrote the fucking state machine and the damn concurrent states.

I feel like a fucking hero!

Class constructor defined on line 700+
😑 Really...

If you’re writing in Python and you find yourself in dependency management hell and you don’t know about pipenv, consider this a friendly PSA:

pipenv is your friend.

Dear self,

If you start a statement with “I think”, you do not have to also edit statement to add “in my opinion”. This is redundant and silly.

Sincerely,
Why are you so freaking timid?

My name is Jimkelly Nzioka, a Flutter Developer from Kenya. A few months ago, a person named Daniel Kibet, the CEO of a company 'Aberison Investments Limited' got in touch with me, telling me that he needed a Flutter Developer. He took me through a couple of tests, as he out them, to gauge my proficiency in Dart and Flutter, since that's what we would use to develop updates fora lthis app on the Google Play Store named 'BOBO' (https://play.google.com/store/apps/...) I passed the test, and he proceeded on to tell me that the app was on Play Store already and he invited me to the office in Miraj Towers, Westlands, Nairobi, Kenya to see it. He presented me with a contract to sign which would go on for a period of 3 years, during which I was to develop the aforementioned app, provide updates maintain the database, etcetera. I live somewhat far from the office and as such, I would work remotely from home, making commits to a Github repository we created for the project. I did a bunch of work for them, including working in the UI (which really needed a lot of work), writing loads of Cloud Functions, as well as Cloud Tasks for functionality they needed. They would also consult with me concerning how to achive some functionality in code and I would offer my honest advice and suggestions. Things seemed to be going on well, until the start of this month. As per the contract, I was to bill the company a sum of Ksh 50, 000 every month that's roughly equivalent to $500. That was enough for me, seeing as I am still a student in University, and I would be working on it as a part time job. However, as of today, September 8, 2020, he has refused to pay me for my work and is ignoring, sometimes canceling any phone calls I make to him. In addition, I noticed he has restricted my access to the Firebase project

I know you probably don't know this person, but you are developers and engineers, and know what it would feel like if you realized someone has been using you, when all along you have been doing your level best to just do your work

Employers have to stop taking advantage of their employees for their own selfish gains

Just bought a green foldable bicycle. 😊 Trying to learn how to master biking straight then will learn how to turn.

Wasn’t hired once because “we are startup and we don’t like your favorite meme that much”. Yes, this is what happened.

Their company was gone in two months.

They said my favorite meme wasn’t so nice
Their bodies are now food for the mice

Things happened this year so far in chronological order:

Applied to PhD and got all rejected

Graduated without a job because I thought the last event wouldn’t happen

Decided to take more shots at universities in Europe and Canada

Paper got published and got best paper honorable mention

Interviewed by couple professors and the one in Canada seems to be interested in me

School in Canada, which rejected me before, reopened my case for review

Bank account got closed because my parents transferred me some money to support my unemployment ass and bank thought it was a fraud

The review process took so long I got hopeless and thought, if I end up writing webpages for other people, why not doing it now? And did two webpages which are in my previous rant, pretty good and highly recommended imo

Canada school promised a date but didn’t follow that date, depression attack

Finally sent them an email and got an answer saying the admission approved my application and they are working on paper work. But I still don’t believe it because I’m paranoid

Got an email from a professor today confirming they are doing paper work and I should receive official paper soon.

You can see the dramatic ups and downs, but in the end, guess I’m going to Toronto for phd

Such a stressful night.

Laptop's battery seems to have died.

Why? Whyyyyyyyyy? Why? 😭😭😭😭

Why me? Why now? Why these stuff always happen at the worst times?

*le me wants to get an icon online*
*le me finds a good icon on a free icon site*
*the icon site does require a free account for downloads but this guy doesn't want to register just for getting an icon*

Inspect element -> copy base64 icon data -> paste into a base64 to file converter online:

Le me has the icon now!

I quit my job today.
It was odd and uncomfortable and emotional and I'm gonna miss many of the nice people here but ultimately my boss was like "I always knew a bright mind like yours would only be here temporarily" 🥺😍 I'm starting somewhere cooler soon and I'm so excited!

Hereby I congratulate all of you with the end of work week.

Cheers 🍻

I'm a DevOps engineer. It's my job to understand why this type of shit is broken, and when I finally figure it out, I get so mad at bullish players like AWS.

It's simple. Install Python3 from apt.

`apt-get update && apt-get install -y python3-dev`

I've done this thousands of times, and it just works.

Docker? Yup.
AWS AMI? Yup.
Automation? Nope.

WTF? Let's waste 2.5 hours and figure out why this morning.

In docker: `apt-cache policy python3-dev` shows us:
python3-dev:
http://archive.ubuntu.com/ubuntu focal/main amd64 Packages

But in AWS instance, we see we're reading from "http://us-east-1.ec2.archive.ubuntu.com/... focal/main" instead!

Ah, but why does it fail? AWS is just using a mirror, right? Not quite.

When the automation script is running, it's beating AWS to the apt mirror update! My instance, running on AWS is trying to access the same archive.ubuntu.com that the Docker container tried to use. "python3-dev" was not a candidate for installation! WTF Amazon? Shouldn't that just work, even if I'm not using your mirror?

So I try again, and again, and again. It works, on average, 1 out of every 5 times. I'm assuming this means we're seeing some strange shit configuration between EC2 racks where some are configured to redirect archive.ubuntu.com to the ec2 mirror, and others are configured to block. I haven't dug this far into the issue yet, because by the time I can SSH into the machine after automation, the apt list has already received it's blessed update from EC2.

Now I have to build a graceful delay into my automation while I wait for AWS to mangle, I mean "fix up" my apt sources list to their whim.

After completely blowing my allotted time on this task, I just shipped a "sleep" statement in my code. I feel so dirty. I'm going to go brew some more coffee to be okay with my life. Then figure out a proper wait statement.

We got a prequalification letter from the bank finally, so: Surprise vacation!

Leaving tomorrow morning to look at houses! 😊 Yaaay! Maybe we can move out of this misery at last!

Working on the road tomorrow, Monday is a holiday, and I’m taking Tuesday off.

Ta-ra ~

My daughter made me two things:
1) She found a rock in the shape of an “alien” head. Knowing I love to research UFOs, she used nail polish to decorate the rock like an alien. And I just love it!

2) I have a reputation for being just like Charlie Brown with my luck in life. I also suck at math. Like, really, really bad. I was diagnosed with dyscalculia 22 years ago. It’s a running joke at our house such that I even have the t-shirt she depicts me wearing in this painting of “me” she did for my birthday.

Our project won in a competition organised by my uni

Searched stackoverflow and found the exact issue I was having. The question is from 2014.

The accepted answer is a messy hack. Fuck.

The second answer is clean, clear, concise. It was posted 38 minutes ago.

Is this real life?

Guys, I have recently made a python package which is published on PyPI.
I am a very junior python lover 😍

Fuckity fuck.

It's weekend.

To all you abusive, micromanaging arseholes… Light a magnesium torch up in your arse and make us smile.

To all you motherfucking dumb cunts who can play 8 hours instead of working, but are unable to cope with the simple task of documentation:

Resign and stay away from civilization as far as you can. Alternative: Self castration and removal from the gene pool

To all the narcisstic workaholics who think everyone must be available everytime... Hop into a meat grinder, it's nice and cozy - I've been told.

It's weekend and I've finished everything. First time in half a year that I can return to a normal weekend schedule.

Dobby is free. And Dobby will stuff a sock so far up your arse that you can lick it clean if you disturb dobby.

:) *happy smile*

super fast "hello world".

Mgmt: We need performance metrics' comparison for those 2 tests ASAP, we'll ping you every 5 minutes

AWS Cloudwatch: *unusually slow - takes ~2 minutes to add/remove a metric or change the timeframe*

Me: *fuck*

AWS Autologout: "Let me just intervene here right before you take that screenshot that took you 1.5 hours to filter out..."