*code doesn't work*

-Run three times, just to be sure
-Its NOT the code, must be the project. Full rebuild.
-Run a few more times after rebuild didn't fix it.
-Google the issue.
-Stackoverflow must be wrong. The code is JUST like their solution.
-Run a few more times, but with your lucky underpants
-Reboot. Must be an operating system thing.
-Tea break. Give the issue time and it will fix itself.
-Run a few more times. Still unfixed
-Contact customer support.
-Walmart said they can't help.
-Consider writing your own language without this OBVIOUS flaw
-Kickstarter for c++++
-Raise $50,000
-Start a family
-Contact customer support again
-Run a few more times
-Now banned from Walmart
-Oh shit, missing a semicolon

Today I decommissioned an old server, that had an uptime of 4130 days.

"Coding is easy. All you need is an idea, and the rest is just typing!"

All I want for Christmas is... 😍😍😍

Slow Internet connection and people who don't follow the Headphones Rules

My friend just started RUBY.
He read somewhere " Ruby is used commonly in rails ".

He now thinks RUBY is for programming trains and station related stuff.

Interviewer: where do you see yourself in near future.
Me: to get a 175+ on my Rant.

Myself 1 week into programming
"I can build a website!!"

Myself 2 years later and multiple web and mobile apps launched
"I know nothing"

Customer at a first meeting:
- "Didn't realize you're a developer, you're almost good looking!"
Never got a more bittersweet compliment.

Code runs, time to remove all the System.out.println("AAAAAAAAA"); from it.

Today I learned: typing "man ascii" into the terminal on Linux will print out the ascii table.
Guess I don't need to go online to find it anymore

When you are a Dev but you don't want to be single

Girl: what's your profession?
Me: I am a writer
Girl: Cool! What do you write?
Me: I write code😎

Client: "My Internet isn't working!"

Me: "You've got your own one?"

"Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning." - Rich Cook

That would be 🙄

When it's time to go into evil mode

Apple rejected my app, because they throught there was a frickin Windows phone on my loading screen.

How insecure can you be?

Damn Dijkstra!

This guy

EDIT: devRant April Fools joke (2017)
-------------------------
@trogus and I have had an absolute blast working on devRant over the last year. However, we're strong believers in only working on a project if you're passionate about it, and over the last few months, we've sadly lost some of that passion so we've to announce, with heavy hearts, that we will both be moving on. We've decided to focus 100% of our energies on our next product, one which we are confident has billion dollar potential: Semicolon JS (http://semicolonjs.com).

We identified this sizable market opportunity as we were building out the new devRant website. Every JavaScript framework we tried left us wanting more. More efficiency. More elegance. More extensibility. That's what Semicolon JS is: more. More than a framework, it's a guiding philosophy. We believe that Semicolon JS will do for front end development what Material Design has done for user interface design. We're calling it Semicolon JS because even though you can still develop JavaScript without it, like a semicolon, we think it will soon become a standard and synonymous with quality JS development.

So comes the obvious question. What will happen to devRant? We wanted to make the announcement today because we will be officially shutting down the product in 30 days. So that gives everyone a full month to take in the last memories, look at those rants they really loved, and hopefully take some time to chat with @trogus and I about Semicolon JS and what we have planned.

With so many thanks and looking towards the future,
- @dfox and @trogus