Excuse me boss!

During increment time
Boss : There are 50 bricks on an Plane. If u drop 1 outside. How many
are left?

Employee : That's easy, 49.

Boss : What are the three steps to put an elephant into a fridge?

Employee : Open the fridge. Put the elephant in. Close the fridge

Boss : What are the four steps to put a deer into the fridge?

Employee : Open the fridge. Take the elephant out. Put the deer in. Close the fridge.

Boss : It's lion's birthday, all animals are there except one, why?

Employee : Because the deer is in the fridge.

Boss : How does an old woman cross a swamp filled with crocodiles?

Employee : She crosses it because the crocodiles are at the lion's birthday

Boss : Last question. In the end the old lady still died. Why?

Employee : Er....I guess she drowned....err...

Boss : No! She was hit by the brick fallen from the Plane that's the problem, you are not focused on your job....You may leave now!!!

Moral: If your boss has decided to screw u, no matter How much u prepare u will be screwed.

Guy: "We just can't finish this in 1 month!"

Boss: "Yeah you can, I'll hire more people."

Guy: "... You know, a woman can deliver a baby in 9 months but 9 women can't deliver a baby in 1 month."

Who Is Who

➡ A Project Manager is the one who thinks 9 women🙍 can deliver a baby in 1 month.👶

➡ An Onsite Coordinator is the one who thinks 1 woman can deliver 9 babies in 1 month.👶

➡ A Developer is the one who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver 1 baby.🙇

➡ A Marketing Manager is the one who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and women are available.👷

➡ A Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.👶

➡ A Tester is the one who always tells his wife that this is not the right baby. 🚶

Don't be shy.. Comment which 'who' are you..😂

A woman can make 4 babies with 4 different fathers in 9 months, right?

Someone decided we need a "rubber band programmer" who bounces around from project to project as needed, and that gets to be me.

So I work on 4 projects, with 3 programming languages, 4 frameworks, and with users in 4 complicated industries, none of which I have experience with.

And my boss wonders why I'm not as productive as everyone who has worked on 1 project for 5 years.

i went to my college bakery and i bought a sandwich (costs 140) and ultra energy drink (costs 90) in my currency

i extend my hand with money and the woman takes a calculator and types with one finger 1 4 0 + 9 0 = and says "230"

I've always heard about the "if one woman can deliver a baby in 9 months, 9 can do it in a month" situation people got in. But my bos just quoted that to me since we are stuck on deadlines.

I came up with what I considered to be a brilliant approach to a festering internal knowledge management problem using a third-party SaaS. I rolled it out and it was very popular. Weeks later, after my profile had become the "linchpin" by which hundreds of other employees had joined the service, I was told that a female employee (yes, gender is important to this story) had produced a proposal for a more in-house solution that used a different company's software and that I would be on the team to roll it out. I thought it was a great idea and I deferred to her on pretty much everything.

Months after that I was accused, by several other female managers, of trying to take over the whole leadership of the project just because of one minor suggestion I had proposed. One day, after a lengthy interrogation about their take on my emails on the matter (lacking only the bright, hot spotlight in my eyes) I was booted off the project and the woman who had proposed the project was promoted. She then proceeded to lord it over on me and treat me like crap.

This type of thing was a general pattern within the company that amounted to a form of a reverse discrimination "policy" (unwritten). The effect was that the ratio of men to women in upper management was not equal but completely flipped. Way more women than men had upper management positions and higher pay.

In their eyes, the ends (women broke through the glass ceiling) justified the means (discrimination and bullying) which I guess is good and "equal", again in their eyes, in terms of the overall perception modern feminism has about men needing a comeuppance.

But in the context of HR's stated policy on equality, meaning 1:1 men and women in position of power and pay and a non-threatening work environment for all, which we all (men and women) were forced to sign every year, it was an utter fail as far as the math and intimidation went.

Today's episode of Bluey is called: "I am not ready to go back to work after a week long mandatory vacation in which I will go back into a space that has made my passion into a shitless grabs for money"

Seriously, If I hear "the president of the institution does not like <X>" I will blow my brains out.

What is worse, every "leAderShiP" meeting I ask if shit is actually a policy towards were my department head says "no, but the boss does not like <X>" <--- then fucking make it a policy.

Seriously, I have a wife, I have but one woman to keep happy, I ain't about to break my back on dumb shit that some lady dislikes when I already have to keep 1 woman happy.

Going to work is a paycheck to me, but fuck man, I am seriously leaving. Good luck trying to find fkers this part of town that can patch my software be it that I wrote it in the most esoteric shit known to mankind on these modern days.

Might start listening to recruiters, I get about 50 offers a day.

I found out today that my company is going to make a huge deploy to implement non-binary genders on our platform, well, they see woman as 0 and man as 1 (insurance company), and they make calculations with the NUMBER, like, value = gender x risk.. The funny part is that this way to interpret gender is going to be awesome when the "2" be deployed, the non-binary genders.. well, fuck, all calculations will be refactored (20 years of development)

Interesting definitions

1. Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine Women can deliver a baby in One month.

2. Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.

3. Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single Woman can deliver nine babies in one month.

4. Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.

5. Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.

6. Resource Optimization Team thinks they don’t Need a man or woman; They’ll produce a child with zero resources.

7. Documentation Team thinks they don’t care whether the child is delivered, they’ll just document 9 months.

8. Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce a baby.

9. Tester is a person who always tells his wife that this is not the Right baby.

nice, the way too old and confused woman i have to do work for suddenly remembered she has a meeting to showcase my mid-development app next tuesday.

she tells me on a friday the week before where i got holidays to have people build stuff in my (new) flat and i have a 1 week work travel thing next week...

i hate people ugh.

sure i can do this till tuesday, not like that shit takes weeks to get stable >;(

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RECOVER FROM CRYPTO AND BITCOIN INVESTMENT SCAM >>> GET EXPERT HELP FROM HACKATHON TECH SOLUTIONS

As a lifelong Indiana resident, I never thought I would fall victim to a cryptocurrency scam especially not one that would wipe out $30,000 of my hard-earned savings. It all began when I was contacted by a woman named “Sophia” through Facebook. She claimed to be a professional crypto investment advisor based in Manhattan and came across as incredibly knowledgeable and confident. Her profile was convincing, filled with images of high-end offices, client testimonials, and even fake endorsements from celebrities, all crafted to earn my trust. At first, I had always been cautious with my money, but her pitch was persuasive. She promised a “low-risk” investment opportunity with high returns, backed by what appeared to be credible audits and consistent performance reports. I decided to test the waters by investing $200. To my surprise, I was able to withdraw the money with no issues, which made the platform seem trustworthy. Feeling more confident, I went all in. Over the next few weeks, I invested $25,000 into what I believed were Bitcoin and Ethereum transactions through her platform. The dashboard displayed constant growth. My account balance soared, and I felt thrilled watching my so-called earnings increase. It looked like the investment was paying off until things took a turn. To unlock my “profits,” I was asked to send an additional $4,800 to cover something called “gas fees.” Hesitant but eager to access my growing funds, I sent the money. Then, just like that, the platform disappeared. My account was inaccessible, Sophia stopped responding, and I was left with nothing. My savings were gone, and I felt betrayed and ashamed. Just when I thought I had lost everything, I came across HACKATHON TECH SOLUTIONS, a cyber forensics group specializing in retrieving stolen cryptocurrency. Skeptical but desperate, I contacted them. They used advanced tools like Chainalysis to trace the stolen crypto across blockchain and collaborated with international authorities and exchanges to freeze the assets. Amazingly, just last week, HACKATHON TECH SOLUTIONS recovered 100% of my lost funds. I was stunned and overjoyed. Thanks to their determination, what I thought was gone forever was returned to me. I learned a painful lesson, but I’m grateful for the second chance. Their contact details are listed below.

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Cryptocurrency fraud recovery hacker for hire // PASSCODE CYBER RECOVERY

My Name is Hana Huang a 59 years business woman from Taiwan who migrated to Canada. I want to take a moment to address a topic of growing concern the significant risks and wide ranging consequences of online crypto investments. While cryptocurrency represents financial innovation and the allure of exponential returns, it also carries substantial dangers. Unfortunately, many individuals, myself included, have suffered devastating losses due to scams and fraudulent platforms. The emotional and financial impact can be overwhelming, leaving victims in a state of despair and uncertainty. In my case, I invested in what appeared to be a legitimate crypto project. However, it quickly became apparent that the venture was a scam. My account was inexplicably frozen, my digital assets became inaccessible, and all communication from the platform ceased. This left me disillusioned and helpless, struggling to come to terms with the betrayal and loss. Desperate for a solution, I came across PASSCODE CYBER RECOVERY, a reputable firm specializing in recovering assets lost to crypto fraud. Despite general skepticism around recovery services, I cautiously reached out to their support team via Telegram, clinging to a small hope. From our first interaction, the representative who assisted me was empathetic, clear, and patient, qualities that eased my initial doubts. After a thorough review of my case, I was asked to submit detailed transaction records through their encrypted email system. To my surprise, within just an hour, I received a forensic report that confirmed my suspicions. More importantly, they outlined a realistic and structured recovery plan. With cautious optimism, I authorized them to proceed. Amazingly, my lost funds were restored to my crypto wallet. The sense of relief and closure was indescribable. This was not just a financial recovery, but an emotional one, thanks to a team whose competence and integrity were evident throughout. Recovery with PASSCODE CYBER RECOVERY was transformative. Their swift, transparent, and ethical approach turned a harrowing ordeal into a story of restoration and justice. To anyone who has fallen victim to a crypto scam, I wholeheartedly recommend PASSCODE CYBER RECOVERY. They do more than retrieve stolen assets; they help restore your financial stability. In a world where scams are rampant, having a reliable ally like PASSCODE CYBER RECOVERY can make all the difference.
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SUPPORT GROUP FOR CYPTO FRAUD VICTIMS - FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER
As a military woman, I’ve been trained to stay alert and think tactically, but nothing prepared me for the emotional and financial ambush I experienced online. It started innocently enough. While stationed overseas, I connected with someone on social media who claimed to be a successful crypto trader. He was charismatic, well-spoken, and incredibly supportive. Over the course of several months, he built my trust. He didn’t rush anything. We talked almost every day about life, service, family, and eventually, finances. He made me feel seen and understood, and I truly began to believe there could be a future with him. He slowly introduced me to his world of crypto investing. At first, I was skeptical. But he showed me a platform where he said he made consistent profits, even offering to help me get started. I watched my investment appear to grow rapidly on the site. It looked real. It felt real. Encouraged by what I saw and the bond I thought we had, I invested more and more until I’d put in a total of $250,000. It was everything I had saved. Then one day, he vanished. No calls. No messages. The platform stopped working. My heart sank. I knew I’d been scammed. I felt betrayed, embarrassed, and helpless. I might be tough in uniform, but behind the screen, I was just a woman who’d been deceived. That’s when I found FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER. From the first call, they treated me with respect and urgency. Their team got to work immediately. They were able to trace the funds through 12 different crypto wallets, following a digital trail most would never find. Eventually, they tracked the money to a real exchange account, one that the scammer had linked to his identity. That mistake cost him.Thanks to FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER expertise, $187,000 of my stolen funds were recovered before they could be laundered or hidden. They worked with international authorities and the exchange to freeze the assets in time. I’m still healing, but I’m no longer a silent victim. I’m speaking out because if it happened to me, a woman in the military, it could happen to anyone. Don’t stay silent. There’s help out there. FUNDS RETRIEVER ENGINEER gave me a second chance.
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I suffered in the hands of scammers losing my crypto assets worth $380,000 to a binary option site online with so much debt on me. I seriously needed the help of a legitimate hacking firm to assist in my case. I went searching for a hacker through the Internet seeking for a possible solution to my predicament and I saw comments about THE HACK ANGELS RECOVERY EXPERT. I had to trust the reviews and contacted them to inquire about their recovery services and what it takes to hire them, they laid down their working terms and conditions which I accepted before they commenced with the recovery. I can’t thank THE HACK ANGELS RECOVERY EXPERT enough for retrieving back my funds from these heartless scammers,

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If you're in London, you can even visit them in person at their office located at 45-46 Red Lion Street, London WC1R 4PF, UK. Don’t hesitate to reach out if you need help!

In December 2024, I found myself embroiled in a financial nightmare that I never imagined would happen to me. This experience has left me with profound lessons, and I share it in the hope that others can avoid the same fate. I am truly grateful to Almighty God for helping me recover both my funds and my peace of mind after an ordeal that seemed insurmountable at the time. It all started innocently enough when I met a woman on a platform called Red note. She presented herself as an investment specialist and seemed very knowledgeable. After several days of friendly chats, she convinced me to send her $10,000 to make an investment that she assured me would yield significant returns. Trusting her expertise, I transferred the money. Little did I know, this would be the beginning of a terrifying ordeal. The very next day, something I never could have predicted happened: the woman somehow gained access to my retirement account and drained every last cent from it. The loss was not only financial but deeply emotional. My sense of security, built over years of hard work and saving, was shattered in a matter of hours. I was left feeling helpless, vulnerable, and grieving over the loss of everything I had worked so hard to accumulate. For several days, I was lost in despair, uncertain of what to do next. Then, by sheer chance, I ran into an old classmate at a local bus station. She noticed I seemed down and asked if everything was okay. After I explained my situation, she shared that she had gone through something similar and had managed to recover her lost funds with the help of a professional. She introduced me to a recovery expert who had helped her, and in my desperation, I decided to reach out. Within just four days, I began working with a team from TECH CYBER FORCE RECOVERY. To my amazement, they were able to recover my lost funds in less than 48 hours. I could hardly believe it—my entire savings had been restored. This experience taught me an invaluable lesson about the importance of vigilance and trust, but also the power of seeking help when you find yourself in a crisis. While I will never forget the anxiety and fear I experienced during those harrowing days, I am now able to move forward with more knowledge and a renewed sense of caution. I hope my story serves as a warning to others: always be careful with your financial decisions, and never be afraid to ask for help from TECH CYBER FORCE RECOVERY when needed.

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I graduated from college and started working in a law firm. I met different people, and as I was still working, I got very close to one of my colleagues, and one thing led to another. Then love came in, and as we embraced it, we decided to tie the knot.

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Considering we were working together, it wasn't adding up to me if we got divorced. We were always free and open with each other, I knew his passcodes and vice versa. At some point, I noticed some sketchy moves from him and it was affecting me mentally cause I couldn't predict his next move.

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I had access to his contacts, deleted photos with his mistresses, his recent photos, whereabouts and location of his mistresses. These messages were getting to me before getting to him first. After I gathered enough evidence,I was ready to attack. I filed for divorce, and it was successful.

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At Well Taken Care Of™, we understand that navigating the journey of perimenopause and menopause can be challenging. These natural life stages can bring about significant physical and emotional changes, and it’s crucial to have the right support system in place. Our team is committed to helping women in Needham, MA, and beyond manage and thrive during this transition with personalized care, expert guidance, and a holistic approach to health and wellness.

Located at 140 Gould St, Needham, MA 02494, Well Taken Care Of™ offers comprehensive services to support women through perimenopause and menopause. Whether you are just beginning to experience symptoms or have already entered menopause, we are here to provide the tools and resources you need to navigate this phase of life with confidence and ease.

Understanding Perimenopause and Menopause
Perimenopause and menopause are natural biological phases in every woman’s life, but they can bring about a range of physical, emotional, and mental changes. Here’s a closer look at each stage:

Perimenopause: This is the transitional phase leading up to menopause, typically beginning in a woman’s 40s, although it can start earlier. During perimenopause, the ovaries gradually produce less estrogen, leading to fluctuations in hormone levels. This phase can last anywhere from 4 to 10 years, and women may experience symptoms such as irregular periods, hot flashes, night sweats, mood swings, sleep disturbances, and changes in skin or hair.

Menopause: Menopause is officially diagnosed when a woman has gone 12 consecutive months without a menstrual period. This phase marks the end of a woman’s reproductive years and is associated with a significant decrease in estrogen production. Symptoms can include hot flashes, weight gain, vaginal dryness, low libido, fatigue, and changes in mood.

While these changes are natural, they can affect a woman’s quality of life. Fortunately, at Well Taken Care Of™, we are dedicated to helping women manage these transitions and improve their overall well-being.

How Well Taken Care Of™ Can Support You Through Perimenopause and Menopause
At Well Taken Care Of™, we take a holistic approach to women’s health, providing support through nutrition, lifestyle adjustments, and functional medicine. Our goal is to help you find balance during perimenopause and menopause and empower you to live a vibrant, healthy life.

1. Personalized Nutrition Plans
Hormonal fluctuations during perimenopause and menopause can lead to weight gain, fatigue, and other physical changes. Our nutritionists can help you create a balanced, sustainable diet that supports your body’s needs during this time. This may include:

Hormone-balancing foods: Certain foods can support hormonal balance and reduce symptoms like hot flashes. We’ll guide you on including nutrient-dense foods that promote estrogen production, such as flaxseeds, tofu, and leafy greens.
Anti-inflammatory diet: Inflammation can worsen symptoms of menopause, such as joint pain and mood swings. We’ll help you incorporate anti-inflammatory foods like berries, nuts, and fatty fish to reduce discomfort.
Blood sugar regulation: Many women experience blood sugar imbalances during menopause, leading to weight gain and fatigue. Our nutritionists will provide meal plans that keep your blood sugar levels stable throughout the day.
2. Functional Medicine Approach
Functional medicine focuses on identifying and addressing the root causes of health issues. At Well Taken Care Of™, we use functional medicine to assess and address hormonal imbalances, digestive health, and inflammation—all of which can be exacerbated during perimenopause and menopause.

We offer personalized treatment plans that may include:

Hormone testing: We can test your hormone levels to understand your unique needs and help identify any imbalances that may be contributing to symptoms.
Herbal and supplement support: Based on your individual needs, we may recommend supplements such as magnesium, vitamin D, and phytoestrogens to help support hormone balance and reduce symptoms like hot flashes and mood swings.
Gut health support: Hormonal changes can impact gut health, leading to bloating and digestive discomfort. We provide dietary and supplement recommendations to improve digestion and support a healthy gut microbiome.
3. Lifestyle Coaching and Stress Management
Stress can exacerbate many symptoms of perimenopause and menopause, including anxiety, sleep disturbances, and hot flashes. Our health coaches can help you incorporate relaxation techniques, such as:

Mindfulness and meditation: These practices can reduce stress, improve sleep, and support emotional well-being during this transition.
Breathing exercises: Deep breathing exercises can help alleviate symptoms like hot flashes and anxiety.