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Our testers want us devs to start paying 50 cents for each bug the testers find. But they won't agree to paying us devs 50 cents for each bug that makes it into production.9
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Hired a new backend Dev. He writes a script and sends it for testing...
Tester: "It's not working..."
Backend Dev: Goes to Mongo and deletes the tester's whole profile...
I cant control my laughter every time I remember this incident...He claimed it was a mistake, I don't think that it was a mistake...the tester had it coming...
"It's not working" that's all he says every time...I mean at least give me something to start with...!4 -
Bruteforce IRL
So I recently bought my first house (yay!).
Whilst doing the initial viewings I saw the below on the backyard and thought "hey that's neat, I can leave a key in there for when I come in late and my fiancée is asleep.
Fast forward to moving in day and the previous owners hand me the keys so I ask "oh yeah, what's the code for the keysafe" and he just looks at me completely blank, so I'm just like "the box on the wall out back" and he's just like "oh! So that's what that is. No we've never had the code for that, bye."
Being a pen tester I'm just stood there dumbfounded thinking "How the hell can you have a locked box attached to your house and not want to know what is inside!"
Anyway, that brings us to now where I'm stood outside in December on a Sunday morning brute forcing my way into my own keysafe.
I wish this didn't run so many parallels with my work life 😂
51 -
So, there's this big company in Poland with its name starting with C and having CEO famous for saying that every software developer can be replaced with a finite number of college students.
They recently lost a HUGE government contract and so stories of people working there came to light. My two personal favourites:
1. A tester who has been fired for finding too many bugs and mistakes in their product. He was also told that bugs are to be found by clients on production, not in-house.
2. A programmer who was yelled at by his team leader for "wasting time" on code reviews instead of typing the code. He was also told he hadn't been hired to criticise other people code.
God, I'm so grateful I don't work there.20 -
Receiving a bug report from the manual tester “numeric input does not work”.
He accidentally disabled Num Lock on his keyboard.16 -
Who Is Who
➡ A Project Manager is the one who thinks 9 women🙍 can deliver a baby in 1 month.👶
➡ An Onsite Coordinator is the one who thinks 1 woman can deliver 9 babies in 1 month.👶
➡ A Developer is the one who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver 1 baby.🙇
➡ A Marketing Manager is the one who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and women are available.👷
➡ A Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.👶
➡ A Tester is the one who always tells his wife that this is not the right baby. 🚶
Don't be shy.. Comment which 'who' are you..😂17 -
So I have implemented all the features required for the current release. Carefully reviewed my code several times, but no testing.
Tester: everything passed green. Not sure whether you're a good dev or I'm a bad tester.
Me: let's call it a draw.10 -
Security tester: Injects XSS into a rich text editor and flags it for a vulnerability.
"Oh that's fine, let's just disable right click on our page so no one can inspect the page and inject anything."
...
My boss ladies and gentlemen.9 -
Story about an obscure bug: https://twitter.com/mmalex/status/...
"We had a ‘fun’ one on LittleBigPlanet 1: 2 weeks to gold, a Japanese QA tester started reliably crashing the game by leaving it on over night. We could not repro. Like you, days of confirmation of identical environment, os, hardware, etc; each attempt took over 24h, plus time differences, and still no repro.
"Eventually we realised they had an eye toy plugged in, and set to record audio (that took 2 days of iterating) still no joy.
"Finally we noticed the crash was always around 4am. Why? What happened only in Japan at 4am? We begged to find out.
"Eventually the answer came: cleaners arrived. They were more thorough than our cleaners! One hour of vacuuming near the eye toy- white noise- caused the in game chat audio compression to leak a few bytes of memory (only with white noise). Long enough? Crash.
"Our final repro: radios tuned to noise, turned up, and we could reliably crash the game. Fix took 5 minutes after that. Oh, gamedev...."5 -
Tester: I'm going to start testing your Android code. How do I set up it?
Me: just bring me an Android test device and I'll show you
Tester: *comes back holding a big golden phone*
Me: *huh? Haven't seen that Android device before... I wonder which manufacturer made it*
Tester: *puts down golden phone on my desk* here you go!
Me: 😱😱😱😱
...
HUH? This is an iPhone!!!!
😩😱😧😖😰😫😵😱😱4 -
Worst bad practice..
Manager: I need code today
Developer (thinking) : let me give it without unit test. Anyways tester will test it.
Manager to tester: complete testing fast.
Tester(thinking): developer must have unit tested it. Let me skip it.
Enjoy testing completed.
God help clients.. 😊5 -
Tester raises bug:
"Error when loading application in Opera 11.1"
Current Opera version - 48
No tester. Just. Fucking. No6 -
Me: So what you are doing in the IT field?
Him: I am hacking bank websites.
Me: OK, that's cool. It is good in free time. What is your actual job?
Him: I am seriously hacking the bank Web site!
Me: Trust me, if you seriously doing that you will never ever mentioned it...
Him: No, I am doing it legally... The bank hiring me to try to hack the website...
Me: OK, you mean that you are cyber security tester?
Him: That is almost the same...
Me: So you are tester?
Him: I am hacking bank's websites...
Me:....7 -
Tester - The app has a bug when I try to buy a ticket
Me - okay, what's the bug ?
Tester - it shows an error
Me (trying to not high-five him with a chair in the face) - What's the error message?
Tester - ah nvm it works now!!
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuu. Explain the issue you dimwit, don't just say it doesn't fucking work!2 -
//
// devRant unofficial UWP update
//
Hi to all Windows 10 users of my app (if you're not, it's never too late to improve yourself).
I really appreciate all your feedbacks on Microsoft Store and via email!
Thanks!
I'm working really hard on v2 to release it as soon as possible.
Since I'm alone and I have a lot of other commitments (university, sleeping, holidays), I would like to release a closed BETA for all users who want to test the new version and send feedbacks, bugs reports.
All you need to do to join the BETA is filling this form (https://jakubsteplowski.com/en/...) by September 15th.
I'm planning to release 3 BETA builds (this could change):
- v2 BETA 1: September
- v2 BETA 2: October
- v2 BETA 3: November
- v2 Stable: November/December
During the BETA phase you will receive the BETA builds as normal updates from the Microsoft Store, after the BETA you will start to receive the stable builds as all users.
Of course you can resign to be a BETA tester at anytime by contacting me.
Anyone who will join the BETA will be added to the "Special thanks" section in about.
Thanks in advance for your help! 😊
53 -
So today, our "senior tester" logged a bug because he "Viewed Page Source" on the web based report he's testing and the Year values are hard coded! So 2017 will have to added manually!
I burst out laughing so hard, all my colleagues think I'm having a mental breakdown.2 -
I love companies that only use titles like 'Analyst'. Then, they can make you work as a developer, business analyst, tester, help desk, or project manager and there's no way you can ask for a raise or promotion6
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I was asked by our tester and scrum master to ignore some failing unit tests yesterday. The tester literally said "no time for tests, we need the build now". The scrum master is also a tester and agreed. I dont think I can respect either of them as testers anymore.3
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I am a tester by profession, But I love coding. Sadly my organisation doesn't allow people of my profile to install IDE/ Programming softwares... So I had to work with what I had... VBA, MS Office...
I started to work on few small Ideas, then I and a friend worked on a macro which automates a 5 year old manual process... It became a Hit ! It changed the whole process... My manager started to highlight it everywhere... Other manager started to come to us for helps....
So I learnt MS Excel Vba, then MS Access vba... started to become an expert...
Now the whole onshore and offshore management knows us by name....
This excitement made me explore other programming language band fell in love with Python and JavaScript...
Now I made a virtual bot for my manager....
That small project paved the whole way of my programming passion...4 -
"IT BROKEN!", the QA tester spoke in unintelligible broken English.
The developer asked for more details.
Then the QA person attempted to explain the problem in a surge of verbal diarrhea and horrible English.
Why do we hire people who don't speak the language of the development team as our QA people? I have nothing against devs and qa guys from India...but it makes my job really difficult when I can't even begin to understand what you are telling me, or even worse...you just tell me "IT BROKEN!" and don't give me a single bit of useful information on how to reproduce the error.
There was this wonderful QA person I used to work with. Her name was Ranjana. She was a beautiful Indian girl with two children, and the best QA person I ever worked with. She took screenshots, grabbed logs, and gave steps to reproduce everything she found. And then one day at stand up we were told she had died. And since then...there has been no one who has ever come close to her level of excellence.7 -
Developer vs Tester
(Spoiler alert: developer wins)
My last developent was quite big and is now in our system testing department. So last week i got every 20 minutes a call from the tester, that something did not work as expected. For about 90% of the time i looked at the testing setup or the logs and told him, that the data is wrong or he used the tool wrong. After a couple of days i got mad because of his frequent interruptions. So I decided to make a list. Every time he came to me with an "error" i checked it and made a line for "User Error" or "Programming Error". He did not liked that much, because the User Error collum startet to grow fast:
User Errors: ||||| |||
Programming Errors: |||
Now he checks his testing data and the logs 3 times before he calls me and he hardly finds any "errors" anymore.3 -
Suddenly it hits me.
It’s 01:20 here but i get it.
It’s ALL a budget thing.
No dedicated tester means less expenses.
No personal parkspot?
No expenses!
And no good staging or testing environment? Less expenses!
Meanwhile every developer can setup, work on, and maintain about 20 websites on their shitty local Windows machine, that doesn’t even have a proper SSD installed, and we are setting impossible deadlines to figure out who will sink and who will swim.
Ow, here is a SSD.. Figure out the installation yourself because we have no IT knowledge or budget for people that do.
You want a challenge? How about 40 other people that are distracting you all day long.
Meanwhile everybody has to improve their skills in js, react, html5, ccs3, angular, .net and razor so money can made faster.
It would be nice if you could build apps as well.
You had a question? Sorry, no time. Expect some feedback 14 days later.
You finished the site?
Great!
But here are 101 bugs to solve before next week.
All hail their crazy company!2 -
Today someone was testing a website for me.
Tester: I've found a bug this button doesn't work
Me: It works. I tested it in Firefox and Chrome.
Tester: I'm using Edge
Me: Oh yeah. Forgot that was even still a thing...7 -
Me: Wish I got one guilty free murder pass..
God: GRANTED! Which software tester would you like to kill?4 -
You Either Die As A Developer, Or You Live Long Enough To See Yourself Become The Tester
P.S. No offence to Testers. It just i hate testers6 -
How was your day at work?
Dev: - I managed to break the whole thing, so s**t! 😭
QA: - I managed to break the whole thing, so productive! 😎
3 -
Why is there so much hate against QA in general??
I read tons of rants about how bad testers are... and as a dev who does a lot of QA work, IT SUCKS!
We (devs) have to accept that are work needs to be tested! Otherwise we want be successful with our products.
BUT the testers need to know the development business! They should be trained at the same level as the devs are.
BECAUSE if the mug on my desk is smarter than the tester it is not going to work!
If the tester has full access to all the technologies, environments and tools (and are capable of using it) he has the ability to HELP!
I THINK that testing should be more than just follow predefined steps and let a random tool generate a bugreport.
I am sure that some of you are lucky enough to work with highly skilled testers so please let them help18 -
Had to get an app moved to a new test server “ASAP”. Got it done, emailed the tester, got the response “Great! We will start testing middle of next month.” Why is my side the only one that needs to rush?2
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Finding a bug as a developer: "Fuck..." *start working on an undocumented hotfix that breaks other parts of the application"
Finding a bug as a tester: "Yeah, right.." *start writing a comprehensive report including all possible failure scenarios and how world famine will increase and men develop boobs if this bug is shipped into production"
Finding a bug as a PM: "Well, the other parts work, right ?" *click randomly on nearby buttons and input fields to "check" if everything is all right. Ditch said report from tester*3 -
Software tester here. Developers what do you think about us honestly? Do you enjoy testers who point out bugs directly or are we a pain in the ass? I feel like developers appreciate my work. I can ask them questions and they are happy I can point out flaws in the app directly. It's also fun to do as a temporary job now.17
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Frequently used answers :)
UI developer - I think API is not working
Backend developer - Front end is not sending the request correctly
Tester - Testing! Testing!
UI/UX - As per android/ios standards...
QA - Let me check one more time
PM - Let us have another meeting and get on the same page
Dev-Ops - It's very complicated you know
CTO - We're working on a next-gen solution
Founder - Let us build something that no one has built, something similar to what google...facebook...
Cridits: My EX-CPO5 -
A true story.
"Ok you did a very good job during these 3 months, so we think you can go on with us."
"Thanks, so how about the final contract?"
"What? oh no eheh, you will do other 3 months as test because we want to see if you can do also other stuff not only as developer, we need that you act also like a secretary, a tester, a manager, and working again for home after work, and also during the weekend, but we can't pay extra work of course. So, what you think?"
The magic world of startups5 -
I heard scary thing.
A tester found an issue yesterday. He came to the dev and reported about it. Apparently the only feedback message was "something went wrong". They spend almost an hour hunting down the cause for that. It turned out the error message was from one of the try-catch. I do not know much details apart from that. At the end, the dev lead said this (which he had said before).
"That's why I don't like to catch exception."
10 -
!rant
Four hours of work.
You think you write spaghetti code? I write spaghetti wires.
H-Bridge dual motor tester for stepper motors.
Speed is controled by pot.
H-bride are L293D.
My third board, and the first that won't go to the trash.
Question. With the baterry off the motor continues spinning with the 5v from arduino.
My question is, is the L293D suposed to do that? Or do I have a short circuit somewhere that is giving power to the motor? Meaning it can burn the arduino.
Runs a 12v stepper from a CD-Rom driver perfectly at 5v from the arduino and actually starts to act strange when I turn the 12v on. (maby the circuit it's adding 12v + 5v?)
24 -
Tester commenting in a Jira ticket:
"Not testable"
Me thinking:
"Why? 🤨 Has he been attacked by a tiger or something?"12 -
IT Definitions of Designations
Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month.
Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.
Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.
Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
Resource Optimization Team thinks they don't need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources.
Documentation Team thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered, they'll just document 9 months.
Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with a delivered baby.
Tester is a person who always tells that this is not the Right baby.
HR Manager is a person who thinks that...a Donkey can deliver a Human Baby - if given 9 Months -
I once worked with an obsessive tester who was bent on ‘testing’ the README file of a Software Distribution.
The README text file was in the distribution zip, so she had to unzip the thing before reading the file, however she insisted that her test result was a failure because there was no README that shows her how to unzip the distro to read the README!
I thought she was joking, but she was dead serious and escalated the ‘issue’ to the manager! I was furious, almost resigned from the project
In the end I had to suck it up and tolerated more weeks of her mindless obsession!5 -
Once during a standup, I mentioned that I needed to fix some unit tests before the build would be ready. Our tester then said "no time for tests, we need the build now". That was a dark day.
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I find a poor tester copy/pasting data from the test environment to the live one, as he accidentally broke it. I ask the DBA, " why isn't syncing SQL records part of the deployment pipeline?"
"You're front end. This is my job. Go do your job."
"... but it's an easy query, and you're exposing us to human error."
"You need to go sit down."1 -
There. I fixed the bug. Tested every way possible 10 times and it won’t break. I’m awesome.
Tells a tester I have a phone with the new app-version installed for testing on my desk when he has time.
He just... came to my room. I gave him the phone. He looks at it, does SOMETHING and just ”Ya man, I broke it”.... whaaaat O.o2 -
Today a tester asked me to make a modal smaller. I read the code and saw modal size was explicitly set to "large". So I was about to set its size to default but I asked myself "what if I enter a random string there?" and I set it to "not-so-big". UI framework handled it well and actually set its size to default. I'm keeping the code that way for future laughters.
8 -
My PM is a glorified Q&A tester. Has never coded in his life and refuses to use jira or slack. He basically emails me a word document (because he refuses to use google docs) with all his "so-called bugs' errors. I dare you to tell me of a worse PM.1
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I call this one the tester than knew too much.
Note: The server the tester is running on has a hard drive that is breaking down...
Tester: Remember the error I talked to you about yesterday?
Me: Yeah, what about it?
Tester: Well the server hasn't recovered yet and I haven't restarted anything...
Me: Well the application itself hasn't crashed so our monitoring application doesn't seem to notice that the service is in a bad state. The error seems only to have brought down certain threads within the application.
Tester: No, I think there is a different issue here and has nothing to do with that error, the application is still doing things.
*tails the log*
Tester: See?
Me: As I said some things are still running and are unaffected by the error.
Tester: NO! It has to be caused by the other error I had a week ago where my file got corrupted. As we said I removed the file, restarted it and it worked again, but had the same problem a day later...
Note: The problem is not related, this time the application is running out of file descriptors
Me: Well... If the problem is the same it would have complained about the file descriptors then aswell, not an I/O error.
Tester: Nope, I think you are wrong!
Me: ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
FML
3 -
So I have to fix this motherfucking insane regex with over 1k chars in it ...
This fucking shit is not maintainable and there are no comments or any other sort of documentation.
And this bullshit was not build via code so that bastard wasted weeks of time to develop that shitty expression by hand on a online regex tester website.
So I have 3 options:
1. Reverse engineer everything and waste my precious time
2. Delete that shit, analyze the input and write the regex via code instead of creating it by hand
3. Look for that "super duper clever" dev and break his legs.
I think option 3 suits me best.
And for you dear reader, if you are regexphile, enjoy this gigantc regex with >16k chars:
http://madore.org/~david/weblog/...7 -
"You always know when you have a good tester, because you're always a little annoyed when that person comes around your desk/cube. The reason for this is that you know that if the tester is in your general vicinity, they've found something wrong with what you've written. All the excuses start to pile up in your mind of 'Well, you're not using it right!', etc, but in the end, you know that the tester is right, and you've just made a mistake in your programming."
-https://stackoverflow.com/a/5256734 -
The hat you wear matters a lot, you don't apply for a job as a Penetration tester with a black hat on.
1 -
Rant!
Been working on 'MVP' features of a new product for the past 14 months. Customer has no f**king clue on how to design for performance. An uncomfortable amount of faith was placed on the ORM (ORMs are not bad as long as you know what you are doing) and the magic that the current framework provides. (Again, magic is good so long as you understand what happens behind the smoke and mirrors - but f**k all that... coz hey, productivity, right?). Customer was so focussed on features that no one ever thought of giving any attention to subtler things like 'hey, my transaction is doing a gazillion joins across trizillion tables while making a million calls to the db - maybe I should put more f**king thought into my design.' We foresaw performance and concurrency issues and raised them way ahead of the release. How did the customer respond? By hiring a performance tester. Fair enough - but what did that translate into? Nothing. Nada. Zilch. Hiring a perf tester doesn't automagically fix issues. The perf tester did not have a stable environment, a stable build or anything that is required to do a test with meaningful results. As the release date approached, the customer launched a pilot and things started failing spectacularly with the system not able to support more than 15 concurrent users. WTF! (My 'I told you so' moment) Emails started flying in all directions and the hunt for the scapegoat was on (I'm a sucker for CYA so I was covered). People started pointing in all directions but no one bothered to take a step back and understand what was causing the issues. Numero uno reason for transaction failure was deadlocks. We were using a proprietary DB with kickass tooling. No one bothered to use the tooling to understand what was the resource in contention let alone how to fix the contention. Absolute panic - its like they just froze. Debugging shit and doing the same thing again and again just so that management knew they were upto something. Most of the indexes had a fragmentation of 99.8% - I shit you not. Anywho, we now have a 'war room' where the perf tester needs to script the entire project by tonight and come up with some numbers that will amount to nothing while we stay up and keep profiling the shit out of the application under load.
Lessons learnt - When you foresee a problem make a LOT of noise to get people to act upon it and not wait till it comes back and bites you in the ass. Better yet, try not to get into a team where people can't understand the implications of shitty design choices. War room my ass!3 -
our tester arguing with software house about blocker severity bug
SH: "No, this bug is not possible. It's possible only when you are logged as admin in other tab"
T: "I managed to replicate it in another browser in private mode"
SH: "But you can't replicate the bug now"
T: "True that I don't know steps to replicate it and it occurs just sometimes... Let me check right now"
...
T: "Okay, I managed to replicate it right now in private mode in other browser on normal user account"
SH: "Because you are admin"
They are pretending to be idiots or just are?6 -
I'm currently working in a web application project with multiple environments for testing, and we need to give support to all browsers.
So when a 'defect' is iddentifyed by someone, we make sure we know all the previous constraints to solve it quicker.
One of these days, this "tester" comes to us:
Tester: There is a deffect in this X screen.
IT: Ok. Can you tell me what browser you were using in the test?
Tester: The same as you. "H T T P : / / localhost:8080"
:D4 -
Added some features to an internal app used by finance. Tester found some bugs, but most of them were due to old code. Tried fixing them, found some more serious bugs that could have a large economic impact. Rewrote the service, squashed all the bugs we found and reduced code by roughly 50%. Felt good.1
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Am I the only one, who likes to hate the tester for sending back your code, when I should be greatful for him/her for finding bugs?
Replies from me by the amount I get my ticket back:
1: okay, sure, thanks
2: all right
3: oh, okay
4: what? still not okay?
5: how did you even catch that?
6: what the fu** is wrong with you?
7: you again???
8: die already!
9: <singing the frozen theme> Let it go, let it go!1 -
Work from Home was not the cup of tea for most of us before Covid-19. 😱
Some really love working in the comfort of their home like your oh-so-lovely HR and some are scratching their heads like your beloved Project Managers.😂
The Designer is loving his space. 😍
Tester is enjoying some good naps in between the working hours. 😴
and... What do you think programmers would be doing? 🧐
Well.. well.. well.. Programmers don't really feel any change. Coding then and Coding now. 😎
How's your Work From Home Going?
4 -
This just happened....
Tester: My cluster is not working properly!!!
Me: What's wrong?
Tester: I don't know. I've checked all the logs available on the entire cluster. All i know is that node 1 and 7 is broken.
*ssh into the cluster*
node1
# less /var/log/<affected application log>.log
*no errors here everything is working properly*
node7
# less /var/log/<affected application log>.log
*goes down to the bottom and scrolls up a few lines*
<insert massive error here>
Checked all the logs eh?
3 -
So I'm not sure I understand this question fully, if it is meant only through code, than I guess none or those people I got to know while I was doing my algorithms and data structures project last semester where we were helping each other with our code
If it's meant generally through code related activities then I gained lots of friends in uni in classes and here on devRant of course and actually yesterday I got to talk unexpectedly about coding and programming languages on an event with a guy who actually studied financial maths in Vienna but now works as a tester and works with databases, that was nice6 -
wrote some JS to make sure that eForm fields which are hidden/disabled via checkboxes are nullified before the form submission. Checking the request and the fields are definitely empty. But the tester says the data is still appearing in the DB. So i am moving immediately to Nepal where i intend to live as a goat.
-
Me: Does Microsoft does beta testing before launching updates?
MS: YOU ARE THE NEW BETA TESTER, WELCOME!
4 -
This motherfucker cocksucker E2E tester first pings me on slack that we are good. And then mails my manager that we are not. I don't mind him pinging me at 2am in night. But atleast he should tell that directly to me first not making me look like a fool. Such an asshole. I might just leave my company because of him. Motherfucking son of bitch.2
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Yet another day at work:
My job is to write test libraries for web services and test others code. Yes I know to code, and have a niche in software testing.
Sometimes developers (whose code I find bugs in) get so defensive and scream in emails and meetings if I point out an issue in their code.
Today, when I pointed a bug in his repo, a developer questioned me in an email asking if I even understood his code, and as a tester I shouldn’t look at his code and only blackbox test it.
I wish I can educate the defensive developer that sometimes, it’s okay to make mistakes and be corrected. That’s how we deliver services that doesn’t suck in production.10 -
I can't wait until I hand in my resignation to become a pen tester, I'm interviewing next week! I'm done with development. Don't really have any message here, but felt like sharing it regardless.8
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Fuck. The entire day to do this shit.
The screen was my first experiment, but because of a bad module (i2c) it didn't worked.
Today I finnaly got it to work.
Starting making everything almost like in the picture, everything mounted (and lots of black hot glue, no wires showing...
Didn't work.
One hour breaking everything apart without damaging the screen... Was a loose wire.
Started again... Didn't work...
The pot is also damaged, sometimes it works, others need to turn it hard.
New pot.
New set of wires.
Soldering everything right, testing all wires so no mistakes this time... But it takes so longgggg... Making everything in modules this time (to reuse without having to sordering again. And finally... It works.
By this time I should have 3 or 4 learning projects finish (I really wanted the screen to adapt all output in text, no serial, no blinking less, everything in modules, code prepared so, when I get my 40+ packages from China I already have a prototype tester ready.
10 hours... Fuck I'm really addicted, or else I would just solder everything together :D
28 -
Tester raises major "bug" about fundamental part of the system 1 week before sign-off....
What was it you ask?
"This field is validating my input and is showing an error"...
Me: "But sir, you have pasted text into a number input!"5 -
In game development feature creep tends to kill games because it's just as much about what's NOT there as what IS there.
Take The Last of Us for example. Would a strategic tower defense segment make sense? No? And if it was a *hugely* popular mechanic at the time of development is there a real chance they would have included such a segment in TLOU? Yes.
Don't just believe me. Go take a look at what happened to the original Fortnite versus the hills-have-eyes inbred offspring that it became all because PUBG and its format were cancerously mega popular at the time.
That's why while developing my game Atom Ranger (now with 100% less multiplayer!), a mix between metro and don't starve, I spent six years *pruning* features. You can click my referral link and get 50% off the opportunity to become an unpaid tester of the pre-prealpha right now, "for hardcore players only!" (Tm)
My game:
5 -
teamLeader: We can't release because your change doesn't work, it breaks on the machine ABC123
iHateForALiving: I diagnosed the issue and I still don't know what's related to. BUT I'm 100% sure it's not related to my change, or anything that has changed in the last 24 months. Anyway we can take a look at this, just give me admin credentials for this machine.
teamLeader: no we can't.
iHateForALiving: ... Wait what? How am I supposed to reproduce the issue? Why can't I access the machine?
teamLeader: It's in use by the testers.
iHateForALiving: What for?
teamLeader: ... Educational purposes!
They report some issue on some particular machine, then refuse to give us access to said machine to reproduce the issue because they have "educational purposes", me and God know fuck kind of education I have in mind for this circus but as soon as I get my hands on them they'll get a hint.1 -
-Management puts unrealistic deadline as usual-
_Tries his best but fails to deliver on time_
*Puts a clearly visible bug in code*
~Tester finds it and creates a issue~
*Solves the issue, wraps up the remaining things and closes the issue*
**Wakes up from dream, cuz he is the tester as well** -
99 little bugs in my code,
99 little bugs in my code,
Take one down, patch it around,
100 little bugs in my code.
1 -
!rant
I am a developer at a tech company. The tester in my team refuse to test my work because he feel I don't respect him. He is a fucking idiot, so obviously I don't respect him. I can still do my job just like always, so I told the cretin it doesn't matter if I respect him or not and he doesn't need my respect to do his job.
At the end of the day I couldn't care less about his feelings. I just hope my boss doesn't fire me when he finds out.3 -
Everytime i tell the tester that the reported issue is fixed. It should all be good now.
He raises an eyebrow and says
"Should be? And Are you sure?" With a smirk.
I can never answer that :/ -_-2 -
!Rant
Hello devRant!!
Just released a small little app to share links to your PC directly from your device (Linker).
It uses a Java server running on your PC so there are no middle-men. Everything is open source and on my GitHub.
It's currently in alpha. Basically:
1. Run server on your PC (no UI ATM so run in a console) - defaults: 0.0.0.0:8090
2. Add the server IP-Port in the Android app
3. Share a link from any app through linker
4. Magic 😎
Below are the links if anyone likes the idea and wants to try it out (UI is crap I know! - I had very little time to work on it)
Become tester:
https://play.google.com/apps/...
App:
https://play.google.com/store/apps/...15 -
Looking for internal testers on my app. It's currently in Alpha.
Android Only
https://goo.gl/forms/...
15 -
A while back we had some time sensitive work I was doing in overtime, the work was purely functional and the front end had not yet been done. It went to QA to test the functionality and the only feedback I got was UX oriented.
I tried to explain on 3 occasions that the looks was not important in the slightest at this stage, and just try to break it. I then got a lecture that it wasn't an optimised layout and was shown the AA route finder as an example of how the tester thought it should look.1 -
"During the middle of a song the game crashes for no apparent reason!!!PLEASE FIX!!!"
Actual bug report on github. Apparently pressing the "Report error" button is to complicated for some people... -
Each time I try firefox after somebody mentions it again or it's in my rss feed, it still seems to never actually advance
It's stuck and either gets worse or goes back to its stable non improving level again, how come do they still not have a proper mobile responsive tester, why are even the upgraded addons still suffering the same container and rendering bugs
how is it more important getting bad image by implementing mr robot malware, than getting on an actual competitive level
why is it default bloated with random pocket addon bullshit, why did it begin to lag, ..
I remember when I was using firefox for a good portion of my life and laughed at how google chrome is laggy, but nowadays theres simply no competition to chrome, its stability and developer tools
I wish there was competition, the grid tools were a great start, but then nothing followed and they just went back to their never improving flatline16 -
Today a tester returned my task because “placeholder should say Bruse Wayne not John Doe”.
Yes, Bruse, not Bruce.
Too bad I’m leaving John Doe there and close it anyways5 -
Since there is Scrum i am programmer , tester , software engineer , networking guy and application manager. Thank you Scrum didnt know that before. And i have no idea what i am doing right now ....2
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And then the PEN-Tester said... "MySQL configured to allow connections from 127.0.0.1. Recommend configuration change to not allow remote connections." hahahaha!
-
A story about a helpless intern : On a fine day an intern was assigned a feature to develope. He worked his ass off, completed it, submitted it for testing, the build was approved by the tester and got released the next day. Fast forward a few days, the feature is failing in few cases at the production.Everbody, starts pointing fingers at the intern.
The intern wonders...How the fuck am I gonna know this fucking use case, do they really expect me to to build a full proof feature without telling me about all the possible senarios...And how the fuck did the tester approved this...? I mean, now that I know this senario, it seems pretty obvious that it should have been tested...!
Note : This also happened to another developer who recently joined...The PM failed to properly communicate all the requirements and the fucking lazy ass tester did not consider all the possible senarios. And the script failed in the production...!
Note : It's 4 fucking AM and the intern still can't sleep...5 -
I didn't posted something in a long time so...
TL;DR: FUCK YOU ANDROID STUDIO YOU FUCKING SHIT PIECE OF SOFTWARE
Thank you for your time.
I am running my own meme social network. For quite some time I wished I knew a Android developer, which could help me.
Because I know java I tried it myself, and Android studio is one of the worst programms I've ever seen.
My app crashed the whole time, just because my studio version was 1 behind. Updated studio, everything worked.
My layout wasn't showing correctly, reopened Studio, all layouts deleted.
For no good reason video views aren't resizing, so I need to use exoplayer.
One video on my platform nearly crashes the app when creating a thumbnail.
And so one....
I fucking hate Android studio...
(PS: if your a German, Swiss, Austrian you could check out my network and may become a beta tester of the app)15 -
I work in a big German company and we are a lot of teams building the company website.
Obviously the website is in German but almost all the devs are not German speakers, included the testers.
To make the work easier in the frontend we use sometimes the translation function of chrome and it's funny because a lot of time I got a bug opened by a tester for a wrong label because HE FUCKING FORGOT TO DISABLE THE TRANSLATION AND HE THINKS THAT THE LABEL IS IN THE WRONG LANGUAGE1 -
Managers at my jobs for the most part leave me be. Though I often have no clue whether I'm doing OK. I guess no news is good news right?
My worst experience isn't that bad. At one place, I was the only tester working on things coming from 20-30 devs. After about a year+, the company finally hired more testers, but it was still only 3 of us.
We were in the final stages of releasing a build to prod. It was going smoothly, or so we thought. At the last minute, I found a buried bug that was a showstopper.
A lot of hatred on me that day, that once it was fixed, and the release was finally deployed, I just shut off my laptop and left. I took all the blame because I was the one who found it rather than blaming the team as a whole for not finding it earlier. Oh well. Stuff happens.
Let's knock on wood that I don't run into worse higher up stories. -
Tests are failing successfully. Tests are working correctly. Maybe tests are failing but for incorrect reasons. Test checkers are failing as well but are they failing correctly? The checker testers are failing too. Checking the test checker tester tests.4
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What do you guys think, is there a couple in the world which consists of a Dev and a Software tester? :D6
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!rant && !!happiness;
I told you some times ago that I was almost fired then put in a new position as tester: my goal is to test if the functionality asked by the client works the way it should.
Today, after 3 months of doing this only, I got to speak with the lead developer, who pretty much saved my ass back then, and told me that not only he was pleased by my work, but he looked at the code I did and liked the organization I set up to handle multiple projects in one folder (trust me, it was INSANE), but he was also genuinely happy about how I'm training the new dude.
And pretty much suddenly, he told me that my logic and knowledge about development was better than some of the colleagues who were there 2 years before I started, I just needed a bit of work to make people forget about what happened in January.
Life is currently fucking good, it's almost sad I have nothing to rant about 😊😊1 -
I HATE javascript syntax like this: `${this.props.app.listingObj.property.id}` What idiot thought this crappy syntax would make things run smoother?
Keep in mind I've been hired as a tester, hence the rants. Were this my own app I'd burn it to the ground and rewrite it.4 -
Bug - if it is reproducible, then it can be fixed with no time.
But it is never gonna be that easy 😂
-
I am so fucking drunk but still I ended up completing a task which is a feature request.... I have no idea how I did it... But it works in staging... That's what I remember.... Will see tomorrow.... I am also the tester in the hierarchy which starts and ends with me... I don't know whether this qualifies as a rant3
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You may know I love to hate tests. Well not the tests actually, what I hate is the TDD culture.
DBMS schema in my app dictates a key can either have a value, or be omitted - it can't be null, and all queries are written with that in mind (also they're checked compile-time against schema). But tester failed to mock schema validation, inserted a bunch of null keys with mock data, actually wrote assertions to check those keys are null (even though they never should be), and wanted me to add "or null" to my "exists" queries.
No, we don't need more tests, and you're not smart with your "edge cases" argument. DBMS and compiler ensure those null values can never exists in our DB, and they're already well tested by their developers. We need you to stop relying on TDD so much you forget about the practical purpose of the code, and to occasionally break from the whole theoretical independent tests to make sure your testing actually aligns with third-party services some code uses.
And no, we don't need more tests to test your mocks, and tests to test those test, and yo dawg, I heard ...5 -
Hate it when the beta tester always laughs when he finds a notorious bug, but loves it when I fix it in mere seconds and his laugh slowly fades...1
-
Tester:
Adding 6 parents & 16 siblings breaks the application. Please handle this scenario....
😡😡😡😡😡😡😡
6 -
Company started automated testing recently, and the devs need to review the test scripts.
The tester assigned to my component writes script to trigger button click and nothing else to verify the result.
I couldn't even. I just left work for the day. -
*Filling out unit test plan for tester which is an Excel Document*
*Excel keeps trying to correct capitalization on a word that I want capitalized over and over*
LISTEN YOU PIECE OF SHIT! If I didn't want to capitalize that word I wouldn't have capitalized it! Just do what I tell you to do! YOU ARE A PIECE OF SOFTWARE! YOU DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!4 -
Fuck me I'm pissed. This sprint, my tech lead has been away and a senior dev has been covering for him. We plan a load of work and distribute stories and we churn threw it quite well. However, my senior dev says let's not deploy until all the works done. I was like, how is it going to be tested? He was like well it will be fine because it's all one test. Bs. We now have 2 days left, tester is getting stressed because they don't know what to test or what's been finished. Scrum master is asking why all of it should be tested at the same time and I'm here like this is fucking dumb. Also the tester decided to start testing with the most complex piece of work, rather than prioritising.
Starting to wonder if I'm just the outsider or whether no one understands that granularity is better.2 -
Ayyyyy folks
I'm looking for some beta testers. Preferably if you use a MQTT broker with some IoT connected shit.
Bonus points for IFTTT.
Leave something in the comments if you're interested and I'll get in touch if the time has come4 -
You cant be a recognzied as a good developer, untill you are a good tester or say produce least bug free code. You should do thorough testing of your code before handing over to QA. I lacked the skill of good unit testing, so have suffered alot in past years.1
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I specified a requirement where certain bits in a certain message shall be evaluated for certain items. The tester came up to me and talked some BS about how to guesstimate these bits by totally different bits. I said, look up the interface definition, the bits are there. Got an email, same BS. Tester was just too lazy to look it up. So I answered that message ID X has bits 60-63 for the four relevant items.
However, I carefully avoided telling him which bit was for which item so that he knew what it was, but I still forced him to look up the inter fucking face definition. -
So, I recently added a new feature to our app which allows the user to rotate/crop the image before being uploaded to our server, and we have an option to upload pdfs as well, so when I gave this feature (rotate/crop image) out for testing, the tester in our organization tells me where's the option to rotate the pdf? And I'm like where have you seen someone rotating a pdf? He's like that's the reason why we need to have it. And now the PM wants me to add that in the next release, after explaining them for 30 mins that pdfs don't rotate, they tell me to do a proper research on it and then revert. 🙃3
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From perfectly working scrum team to... Don't know what it is now...
Long story short - our SM left company and our team have ongoing "reorganization", our tester leaving at the end of this month, probably we will be out of tester for next month...
I don't mean reorganization, it's normal thing, but... It looks like it's slowly collapsing under bad head decisions (one of them is the reason why our tester is leaving)... Multiple "side" projects / tasks for ppl in team and problems with delivering sprint tasks on time because of it, context switching etc.
I fucking like this project, it gives me much opportunities to learn new things and design new features - it's up to us how we will implement it. Client is satisfied with our work and we worked for their trust for long time. But if things will be going same way as now, we will probably lose it.
How do you think, is it worth to try stay with this project? Or should I update CV just in case?6 -
A shitty job is any job where there's a role "manual tester", defined as a person with no software development experience clicking about some application. That person/role is bad for health and will shorten your life. Stay away!2
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Good evening programmers, IT's, devranters and memeians.
I would like to use a little bit of your collective conciousness - the hive mind if you will.
I've been working on my automation system for quite a while and I've received some exposure from non-programmers - which resulted in more questions than suggestions.
I would like to ask you guys to give me some suggestions as to what I could add to my system.. that is, if you have time..
The program in short (if you don't want to read the readme file) is an automation system scriptable in pure Lua.
It utilizes Selenium for web automations, NAudio for audio operations and Moonsharp as an interpreter.
While my tester friends say that they use it for the actual testing, I myself found it very useful in writting bots (for browser games for example).
Here's the github link: https://bit.ly/2GDu92g
Thanks a ton!
PS. Here's an unrelated image to draw your attention.
6 -
Why they are keep assigning tasks (new features as minor fix) till release date. And want me to complete it a week before release date.
HOW?2 -
Almost..
I am a web developer and assigned in a project as Infrastructure Engineer AND Penetration Tester because no one is available. I survived that hellish experience, i learned clustering and other advance stuff on my own, studying even late at night, no training..just youtube videos. PM (who is currently has little to no involvement in this stage) has very little appreciation in what im doing(research, server estimates, diagramming, documentation, planning)2 -
When a tester found a bug that you never think of and you cannot reproduce it. What is your response ? 😄3
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I am already tired before even looking at this code.
Looking at your code makes me cry.
I can insult myself whole day but it won’t be enough to survive looking at your coding style.
If cpu could talk it would ask for heater removal because your code depresses it so much.
Looking at your code makes my monitor burn out.
Downloading your code makes my hard drive stop.
And my favorite:
You’re already good developer so now stop writing and appoint as manager / tester. -
The number of roles you are expected to do these at this company, to be paid for just one of them.
Business analyst , developer, tester, first line support, architect, devops engineer, recruiter.
And you have the cheek to ask us what we need to keep this shit alive.
(Obviously it’s more people but the answer to that is no).
Fuck right off.
I do not care if this company doesn’t meet its contractual obligations and goes into administration.
It’s not my company, I can walk into another shit company easily, maybe I’ll even get lucky and find a good one.
Why don’t you people at the top who are being paid six figure salaries and telling everyone things are wonderful pull your fingers out of your collective arses and doing what your paid for.
You fuckers deserve all that is coming. -
You comment that the fix is in the latest version, tester creates new task PLUS reopen referring to OLD fucked up VeRSiOn!!!
Which fuckin part of testing the latest/commented/tagged/worklogged/code reviewed/merged/invited/CIed version dont you understand?!?!
3 -
Stack Overflow people have profound buffallo bullcrap on their skulls, they are some software engineers who have fucked COBOL and BASIC, probably somewhere like NASA, just pondering out where someone post a question. They're probably some etilist cult banging a prostitute while delivering that awful downvote imitating the slap they give the chick during sex. They desire questions such as
"RANDOM_fuck_module_Abdul.method() not working in python" or "how to dock the dock by undocking" (tagged: AWS). Not things like "why does the audio tag not work in a PC but works in w3school tester?" or a genuine programming question. Fuck.
We don't tail recurse or loop abc for k in godfuck loops, huh? We make simple things as: a form, a http request to dell.
I hope there penises get rotten in the hell. Period.
this is just a part of SO.13 -
So I'm a software tester and about a week ago I started developing a simple node application in my spare time. I was also about a week ago that I found devrant.
I didn't know I needed to add my statics in index.js. I spend two days on fixing a mime-error.
..I need a rubber duck.
But learning to code and devrant are really awesome! :D1 -
<iframe src="index5.jsp">
Hello Mr. Tester Guy, At last you finally saw this. I don't know how to say this but I'm sick and tired of your bs!
You wanna know what’s wrong with everything?
I could tell you what’s wrong with this country – or at least I could give you my opinion about it. I could tell you what’s wrong with “the church” (as though all churches are guilty of what some churches do). But I can't fucking tell what your problem is!
Let’s get pragmatic for a second.
I have worked tirelessly for over only God knows how long, trying to get this platform running on all browsers in this world even on obsolete ones (IE7,6,5,4,3... to the shithole).
You are heartless!
After all these pain you still rant about index pages not rendering equally in time across all browsers.
You are a demon from hell!
I could go on, but with your degree in Q.A. (like measuring the margin between two images using a tape-rule or looking for typos in a dummy text) you should understand my point fucking cunt.
I realize I just ranted a little, but I’d like to think that this rant is more of an attempt to end the useless practice of ranting about your moronic findings on this platform.
The devil awaits you in hell, bitch!
</iframe>5 -
Things which make me feel badass tester (and dev too) are: dark themed IDEs, using command prompt/ terminal (still as exciting), and when my code actually works lol4
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The correct amount of applied test time is often subjective. My theory to objectify is this.
Plug a tester into the mains supply.
Turn the juice on.
When his screams reach a certain pitch, you objectively know QA is done.
Thoughts?5 -
So today I started looking at an old project (site/api tester) I backlogged due to various blockers.
I started remembering things and after setting up the testing app, I realized it depended on an extraction app that I wrote before that. And this reminds me of the whole start of all this testing stuff going back more then a year ago.
It sorta felt like I just took the cover off a hole? And then remembered how deep it goes.
And thankfully I left myself documentation... Though took me a while to find and still looking... (tracing from 1 project to another) -
My biggest insecurity as a developer:
A tester calling me stupid and I cannot make up a convincing argument in my defense.
I avoid dealing with testers 😋5 -
I understand risk aversion and fault tolerance and verification. But you have to realize mister tester and systems lead guy, WE DON'T HAVE INFINITE TIME!!! Gods damn, seriously. You can't keep pushing the schedule. Eventually we have to ship. That's, you know, how we get paid.
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Tester has found an issue: controller input stops working when performing certain steps.
Creates a report and provides an attachment.
The attachment depicts some menu where, at first, the cursor moves around various options, then simply stops moving.
The problem:
Since this is a simple in-game recording, there is neither an overlay of the controller w/ a visual representation of the input actually being provided but not working, nor there is a camera recording available where I can see the tester pressing buttons on a controller.
For all I know, the tester put down the controller / stopped pressing buttons.
...I've also seen reports of animations not working... w/ fucking screenshots attached.
How the fuck can you see something not being animated in a fucking static picture?4 -
When you get brought into a new dev job and the lead tester says "oh good, the junior bug boy is here"... Not sure if he thinks I'll be squashing them or making them...
-
tester reports a bug to developer, developer corrects it and generates another bug and hand it over to the tester, tester reports a bug to a developer...2
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I am still confused why people treat testing as secondary position? Tester are paid less and they hire lower quality engineers. I think testing is as important as any other phase of development, like design or implementation. . . and yeah we do testing of our own code. The only thing I can do in my case is to see that people who change my code may not break basic functionalities. And again about edge cases, try to handle some other left to be seen in production( those which I could not think of due to lack of time) I take care not to leave edge case but sometime cannot do it. I just hope people realise the worth of testing.1
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I need to shoot some QAs out of a cannon. Not being trained in artillery ballistics, this is a challenge. Does any kind soul have suggestions for correct charge quantities, caliber, and trajectory projections? Thanks in advance.6
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A customer asks for a change request or a bug fix and it results in creating a ticket for that.
It's the process and how it works in most places but after you finish with the task and fix the same customer who provided you with the requirements will request that you share the steps on how to test the fix or the feature.
I'm not speaking about the data preparation or required configuration. I mean a step-by-step instruction on how the tester/QA will test it.
It's driving me mad!! So a way to counterplay this stupid requests, I provide the happy path and what to expect. And in case, they stumbled on a bug later in production, I can easily say "It was approved by your testing team and that's a new requirement ;)"2 -
Anyone else get LinkedIn messages like this on the reg?
“Well, I wanna work with US clients but most of them want to work with US only developers.
Also, I think US developers' hourly rate is much higher than others.
So i hope to collaborate with you.
Well, If I explain in detail:
- We will apply for jobs on several job platforms.
(Angel, Dice, Indeed, …)
- If the clients require video/voice interview, you will do that.
- I will do all the tasks.
In this case, you are the manager, and my role will be the coder and tester.”9 -
Thread about Quality Analysts/Testers!
I've seen that Managers and HR get a lot of shit thrown their way but I'm surprised to see no love for our QA friends
What was your worst experience with a QA/Software Tester? When was the last time you felt like punching your monitor over an argument with them?
If you're a QA, what has been your worst experience with developers?6 -
Been working on a backend-service, sending notifications to our app. Shit didn’t work in backend. I made some adjustments, commited and pushed. Didn’t think it would work and just went home.
Our tester had a app-version connected to my dev-server(Continous Delivery from my last commit). Got an email. ”I see you got the notifications working”. I had a high polling-rate in backend for testing. He got spammed lol
At least my code worked 😂1 -
Report comes in that there is "no purchase confirmation screen" in the app.
Well, yes the hell there is, so I use the test credit card to make a purchase. Sure enough, it works fine on my testing account. Just to be sure, I try a couple other test accounts. Flawless.
"No, try it on *this* account"
I try again on their stupid account. Works fine.
"Well I just tried it in Chrome and it worked, it doesn't work in Firefox"
I was already testing in Firefox...
Wasting my time over a corrupted browser profile.. GTFO, why are you even a tester? -
Interesting definitions
1. Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine Women can deliver a baby in One month.
2. Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.
3. Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single Woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
4. Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.
5. Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
6. Resource Optimization Team thinks they don’t Need a man or woman; They’ll produce a child with zero resources.
7. Documentation Team thinks they don’t care whether the child is delivered, they’ll just document 9 months.
8. Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce a baby.
9. Tester is a person who always tells his wife that this is not the Right baby. -
!rant
Hello guys, a spy here. Working as a software tester, currently doing automation with Robot Framework, learning some Python on the way. Came to read about dev things. I really like it so far.2 -
I worked for 16 hours straight without any break because client kept me on call with screen sharing on and asked me to solve all the bugs from last 6 months of coding because he wanted to go live next day.🤕
Ps: I was the only developer and the only tester of that project.1 -
Me: I'm a developer and what're you?
Him: I'm a tester.
Me: We can be friends until the release...
Him: After that?!
Me: It gets difficult...1 -
After brute forced access to her hardware I spotted huge memory leak spreading on my key logger I just installed. She couldn’t resist right after my data reached her database so I inserted it once more to duplicate her primary key, she instantly locked my transaction and screamed so loud that all neighborhood was broadcasted with a message that exception is being raised. Right after she grabbed back of my stick just to push my exploit harder to it’s limits and make sure all stack trace is being logged into her security kernel log.
Fortunately my spyware was obfuscated and my metadata was hidden so despite she wanted to copy my code into her newly established kernel and clone it into new deadly weapon all my data went into temporary file I could flush right after my stick was unloaded.
Right after deeply scanning her localhost I removed my stick from her desktop and left the building, she was left alone again, loudly complaining about her security hole being exploited.
My work was done and I was preparing to break into another corporate security system.
- penetration tester diaries2 -
yo tester, I mentioned that I was off for half a day, WHY in the world are you trying to contact me to say that the test environment does not work??!!?!
There are more capable developers online that can fix that for you!!!
Stupid incompetent person!2 -
So my company has 2 different apps that work using the same API located on 2 different servers.
I mistakenly uploaded both apps to the store with the same server reference.
QA tester alerts me on this issue.
Boss: hey, I the tester said both apps works with server1, ask her more info
Me: (what extra info should I need? I've already been told what's the issue in details, so what's the point?) ok, will do.
Me to QA: hey, do really both apps work on the same server?
QA: yeah
Me to QA: ok, will fix
What the fuck have I accomplished by asking the QA team about it?1 -
Next month I am going to work as a tester(1rst work in IT), have no expiriance at all.
I would like to prepare, but what should I prepare for, what should I learn/repeat/exersice?
Thx12 -
Hi, everybody. I'm a software tester, and I'm dreaming to be a developer. Was dreaming... Week ago I have lost my passion totally. About 1 year or more, everyday I woke up at 4:00 at the morning to start coding, reading books, solving problems in Android development, and now I feel that I've lost my passion. I feel that mobile development is disgusting. I'm trying to start with Machine Learning, JavaSript frontend development, Python, Java and Spring and everywhere I realise that I have to learn a lot to get a job. I see a lot of ways, but I really don't know what way to choose. I'm lost. I want to die.4
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QA Tester: titles in table items look like links and are clickable, they should be plain text.
Senior Dev: style={{ color: '#000' }}5 -
I've been selected as an amazon echo tester for my country.
to agree fill this survey and you will receive a free Echo:
*fine*
do you have WiFi?
yes (you already know that i have a fire tv stick so you know even the password)
what mobile os do you have?
android (you already know also this i have the amazon app installed in it)
where do you live?
*my city* (you know that from ip address & shipping addresses)
imagine what them will now that i will introduces an open in mic in my room....
(i think that i will keep it behind firewall when i am not at home and when i dont want use it)2 -
I displayed "score: 0" on the dashboard and on the review list, tester noted it as a bug stating; it should have been "score: 0.0" and not "score: 0" because the score is precision based.
You can say this is a half cup full and half cup empty scenario but I will call this silly cup full and brain cup empty!3 -
Dev: check these out everything is perfect as usual
Tester: your last code behave like windows update dude -
Tester waits for the batch job to take effect by receiving emails, until he realizes that it is impossible to receive any mail since password has already expired
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- load tests via web
- load tests via api
- figure out why the fuck hibernate started proxying Blob.class after migration rather than using jdbc implementation, like before
- fix ^^
- reconfigure tomcat to ditch random for urandom completely [still getting econnreset]
- continue conversation with sysadmin, tester, analyst, 2 PMs, infra architect, junior dev
- provide immediate support for analyst and tester as soon as they need it
- provide support to another dev on another project
and that's my today's todo list. I think I need more personalities [more threads] to keep going -
So I work in a so called agile team of 5 people, where on of the members has the role of tester. Now this person doesn't have much technical experience, if any, in regards to coding, so the purpose of the tester is primarily to fo automated UI tests and system testing. Am I in the wrong for questioning the importance and relevance of this role, or is it just because in my previous work experience, the developers had the responsibility for testing whatever was made, and I just have to get used to this new way of working?9
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Got rejected for an UX designer position turns out they were realy looking for a UX tester with project leadership skills 🤗 does that even mix bro???
Note to self 🤔 never apply for jobs there in the future 🤔1 -
There was this one time when we've managed to upload a Debug build to Google Play Store.
On the same day we had to create a new build w/ fixes, have the testers perform smoke tests, then switch to some fairly quick overall tests.
If nothing were to come up during those tests, the build was supposed to be passed over to the submission manager for release.
Things weren't going that smoothly in the beginning, w/ the first two builds being broken in one way or another.
Finally, however, we managed to create a properly working build.
QA hadn't had that much time to test it, but no major problems were identified && given the deadline we had to submit it.
The next workday it turned out that the tester responsible for passing the approved build over to the submission manager gave him the Debug build.
The submission manager none the wiser uploaded that build for release.
Result?
The users who managed to update their game got their save data wiped... sort of.
It looked that way given the Debug build was communicating w/ a different server.
In the aftermath of that situation, we had to repair the damage && upload the correct build as quickly as possible.
Also, ever since then a huge text 'DEBUG' was added to the loading screens of Debug builds to make people very aware of which build they were looking at.
As for any repercussions for the tester responsible for the mess, or the submission manager - I have no idea.
They were both still working there, so at the very least none of them got fired because of this. -
Finally some real vacation. Heavily needed. Can't stand that type of remote work any more. Our dailies and pull requests have become mere dick-measuring contests. Morally puffed statements about THE RIGHT way to do agile and clean code, and architecture. Endless vacuous, monologues, which they only endure so they can start our own - but shit just does not get done.
And then they don't want to invest only a day or some hours to get some integration tests running on more machines, which could save the one overworked tester we have a lot of work. But whatever. I've lost all motivation and hope. Shall they deal with their own shit. Maybe I just need more sleep or some antidepressants, because I'm really fed up with it.
Makes we wonder why I even fought this battle of the last two weeks, when thanks to Apple's changes in macOS's codesigning our new binary wouldn't run on any "real" machine. But according to them packaging and signing is only a trivial issue, nothing to do with code. Yeah, well, then they should do that shit themselves next time.1 -
PO writes a story. We groom it. Point it. Do the work. Finish the work. Dev test it. Push it to test. Tester find a weird edge case. Talks to me. I agree it’s weird. I talk to PO and the PM in the standup. PO realizes the whole business flow doesn’t make any sense. Changes the AC. Asks us to change/redo shit. 2 days until the end of the sprint.
I guess I’m working this weekend. Not that I have to go anywhere 🤷🏽♂️4 -
You stupid tester first add you freaking requirements and not just put back stories on todo and say it's not finished. You are just testing how an web app works. We can also automate that process you know!!!!
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I'm wondering if anyone worked in Microsoft as Data Labeler?
I'm supposed to have an interview in about a month, but since I stated that I know at least basics of C#, Java, and Python, they said I'd have different kind of interview.
I would appreciate any kind of advice, since I'm getting anxious cause I don't know what will be expected from me now cause u usually don't need any coding skills for that job
Edit: the new position is somewhat of an alpha tester I think5 -
So.... we're going to support the .NET WebBrowser control as a supported browser now. Yeah, the one from System.Windows.Forms. It can't even run a basic browser conformance test, barely if at all supports jQuery 2, and throws an error message if you look at it the wrong way. Time to hire a new tester.
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Who the fuck authorizes a new build to be pushed at 430pm on a friday and then demands full regression testing be done immediately regardless of how long it takes? Fucking analysts shouldn't be allowed to dictate the schedule if they don't understand the effort required behind the scenes.
99% of the time I wouldn't care but I'm the only tester with DB access and I'm supposed to go on the first date I've had in months tonight at 6.
#HelloDarknessMyOldFriend2 -
The awkward moment when someone tells you that they use your software but that's impossible because it's in private beta and your the only tester...
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What does a software tester do between releases?
I mean, it can take weeks before another release comes up. What do they work with between releases?7 -
New strategy to combat managers:
If you claim we can't afford the additional time for the tests that come with the feature, I won't build the feature.
If you claim we can't afford the additional time for the proper API versioning that comes with the feature, I won't build the feature.
And finally, if the internationalized texts, designs, and image assets are not complete when it comes time for development, I won't build the feature.
It's time to rise and stand against the "You're an engineer! do it all!" notions. I'm not a designer. I'm not a translator. I'm not a by-hand manual customer tester. And I'm certainly not going to take any more of your shit.2 -
Hi,is anyone here a Software Tester by profession.It would be awesome to know what kind of work you are getting into as I consider it one of my career choices after I finish my degree.3
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- One of the reasons for test driven development is that human makes errors. Both in developing the software and in testing it. So it's cheaper and safer to let computers do the test.
- So... who's going to develop the tester software itself?
- Human!1 -
Hmm.. I applied as a QA Tester on company x instead of web developer(back-end). So that I will know how to properly test my side projects. And planning to shift on web development on the next year. I hope this is right. Haha2
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Did this interview with a tester for internship. Started to get the feeling that this person maybe should have chosen another education.
On the question: "What do you like with testing?", the answer was "Designing templates for bug reports".
Guess it's gonna be a quite boring career.
And no, we didn't hire. -
Hello, my first time here. I got to know this website/app from my PM because I need to vent it somewhere other than him according to my PM.
So, here goes my first rant. The date is today (Monday). The rant subject is our new tester. Some context on the guy. He started in our office 8 weeks ago and his title is senior tester with some years in testing. Me and my team with the exception of our PM are new hires and for me, this is my first job after graduation.
After a grueling month of pushing for new modules and bug fixes from our monthly UAT from the client (yes, this will be a future rant one day), about 2/3 of the team is on vacation paired with a long weekend. So, a very few ppl in the team including me and my PM came for today.
I usually came quite early, around 8 am as I commute with public transportation. As soon as I have my breakfast and just getting ready to open my dev laptop, he came to me with a bug. This is like under an hour I came to office. I'm ok with anything related to the project as today was deployment day to test server for our monthly UAT. So, I check the bug and it wasn't my module but the PIC is not there and I familiar with the code thus I fixing the module.
Then, not even 15 mins later, while fixing this module, he came to me with another bug. I'm still the only one who in office that can fix it thus have to do it too. Finished the both bugs, pushed and je retested it. Fortunately, my PM and another colleague came. But, for some reason, he only comes to me for the bug fixes.
The annoying thing for me is that he comes to me every time he found an obstacle, bug or glitch. At this rate, by hourly. Thus, this cycle of impromptu going around fixing-on-the-go for the project begins, for me. Then, my PM asks him abt our past issue log given by the client UAT. Another annoying part is he never checks the clients feedback to see if the result can be produced again. The time he checks it is when ppl ask abt it and test it 1 by 1. Then he came to me again with why x person marked it as done. Like hell I know why they marked it done, you the one who need to check with them. Thus, I called/messaged the PIC for x modules abt the issue and then they explain it. I have to explain it again to him abt it and then he makes the summary report for the feedback. This goes until lunch.
I thought the bug fixes is over and I can deploy it after lunch. I thought wrong and I kinda regret coming back early from lunch which I thought I can rest for a while with the debacle over morning. Nope, straight he comes to me after I sit down for 10 mins and until almost work hour is done, he came to me with small bugs and issues like previously, hourly. By then I think I crushed like ~10 bugs/issues and I'm knackered. I complained to the PM many times and the PM also said to him many times but he still does it again and again. Even the PM also ranted to me abt his behavior. The attitude of not compiling an issue log for the day and not testing the system to verify what the client feedbacks are valid or not is grinding my gears more and more. Not hating the guy even though his personality is quite unique but this is totally grinding ppl's gears atm. As of now, it's midnight and I finally deployed the system to the testing server. This totally drains my mental health and it's just Monday. May god have mercy on me.
Owh, the other colleague that come today? He was doing pretty much the same thing but he was resolving a major issue which is why the tester came to me.2 -
I want to relocate to U.S from South Africa.
I'm qualified as a systems developer and currently doing an internship as a QA tester (automation)... sigh.. where to start.. SA has no future for devs here.3 -
The programmer day is the 256th day of the year (nerdish mind-blow). Why the QA/tester day was yesterday (9/9) I have no idea.3
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I think one shouldn't be friend with their colleagues specially they are tester or manager .. Its hard to manage then.4
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Anyone ever heard of robot framework? Its the biggest pile of shit i have ever seen! WHY THE FUCK CREATE A TEST FRAMEWORK FOR TESTERS WITHOUT REAL CODE AND JUST KEYWORDS WHEN ITS SO FUCKING COMPLICATED TO USE THAT NO FUCKING TESTER CAN DO ANYTHING WITHOUT HELP OF A DEVELOPER. this shit tests cost me hours each week to fix because every minor change breaks like a a dozend of tests... i dont rant often but everytime i have to fucking take a lool at that shit a start to boil...3
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I just had a long argument with the scrum master about my roles as a developer, and apparently it looks like, that I am a tester and a project owner too. For just one payment. FML!
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Ohh......man. These manual tester wants everything from developer. They will simply clicking here and there in the application.1
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Programmers & Testers share a very special bond ❤️
They always argue & disagree on countless things but no matter what they are always there for each other. 🥰
2 -
When your project manager/tester keeps changing different fields required, which is being handled 100% with JQuery....requiring you to rewrite the entire functions logic
This has now happened 4 times... -
Oh yeah! I am a struggling coder. I have a dream. I want to be a coder what if I am a software tester now. I will create my own softwares. The day I get my concepts right, you will see me scripting your story!
2 -
Workin on Group Projects (consists of 3-5 people) while studying in College :
- there's always that one guy / woman who fulfills as a "solo player"
- the others :
act as the entertainer of the group,
the accomodators of food and/or place,
the report printer,
the "tester",
the "boss",
etc. you name it 😂...
comments below for some additions -
Hey guys, I want to do a cyber security career. For me it's the most interesting field in CS. How can I get started? Is it worth to do some online courses where you get certifications (asking this because they are kind of pricey). I'm a QA Tester with 1 year of work experience, don't know if I should just apply to jobs or acquire skills/certificates first. Thanks for all the incoming answers. :D5
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It has been sometime since my last rant, but a Tester return a work item saying it did not work. I called him shared my screen went through the item he sent back multiple times without issue and followed what he said he could not do!! Within debug and a test release. I said "I'll send it back to be signed off" He said "Well it did not work for me so I'll be sending it back tomorrow!"1
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!rant, question
Hi, as a developer turned tester I was wondering if anyone here would hear a talk about what on earth testers actually do in a project and how they contribute to the product? I mean besides writing automation scripts or checking if all the requirements are met (the latter is really the most boring part of testing).
I am thinking of doing a talk on this but don't know if Devs might be interested and which conferences I should target.2 -
When devs have to test tickets end to end in stabilisation week that have passed in previous sprints because the company doesn't want to cough up more than 2 QAs...
I am not a tester. This is bullshit.
(Obviously I e2e test my tickets during the sprint before deploying and passing them on to QA to test and hopefully move on to 'Done') -
Let me share my sprint with you.
So, we lost a developer this at the start of the sprint because the organisation we work for is total cancer.
Project manager frequently says to us that it's better to under commit than over commit.
Come sprint planning, we commit to exactly what we know we can achieve.
Of course, the PM whinges and says we need to put more in the sprint. So, we say sure, but we can't guarantee we will deliver everything on time.
Fast forward 2 weeks, we complete 90% of what we committed to.
PM is whinging at stand ups, asking us why some user stories are still in 'ready for test'.
We try to explain to the PM that 2 weeks ago we made ourselves very clear that this point 2 weeks later would most likely happen.
PM stops whining.
Tester starts whinging about only having a couple of days to test. Blames developers for not adhering to acceptance criteria.
>User stories aren't actually user stories, they're user essays.
How do you deal with this?3 -
In google play store we enabled internal testing track of my app for my testing account. when I visit the page with testing account it says "Internal beta", and few lines below it says I am a "beta tester". Is beta tester the same as internal tester? can't google even consolidate the terms?2
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Me: it's a regression bug, I'll update you once I've patched and deployed.
Tester: What's a regression bug?
🤔3 -
What is the best way to install iOS app for employees in a company?
Disclaimer, I'm no iOS developer.
In 2019 my boss asked if I could make a small iOS app. 3 forms which will have CRUD operations. I did it because I wanted to learn iOS development. The company got an Apple Developer Account and it finished the project within the week. The app can be used only from work's wifi, so if you try to use it outside that network will not work.
The issue is license. When I install the app from my XCode to one of the employees' iPhone, the app will work for 1 year (if I have paid for Developer Account). Also every time I make an update, the employee have to come to me with the iPhone and I have to install it directly.
Yesterday I submitted the app for Testing using TestFlight. The app updates automatically, but today I got notification that the "Submission for testing is rejected", because the tester could not connect with the server.
My question is, How do you install iOS apps for your work employees? I do not want to get Enterprise account because that will cost.5 -
What the fuck, does an EAT even do?!! Other than gaining a salary comparable to a Dev and just sitting in meeting day in day out.
How the fuck can someone work in tech without knowing even the basics of programming12 -
Ya tu qu'elle qu'un qui sais si vuejs et PWA marche bien ensemble ? Je veux bien me tiré une bûche puis tester tout sa !8
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!rant
Ok, so I want to become penetration tester/ethical hacker. I'm learning programming in python and I'm wondering if that is good programming language for that job?5 -
Typical monday... the new funcionality I have to implement on frontend requires additional changes on backend (out of my reach). So I wait. And in the meantime I switch to bugfixing and suddenly some tester changes the data in the scenario (a very specific one) I was working on.
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does anybody of the alexa skill tester actual read the additional test instructions given by the developer?
please be aware that this and that can be used likewise. pleade provide information why the utterance abort invokes default even if i keyed it to stopintent
'given this, expected that. cancel doesn't an abort'
you don't fucking say!
(sorry for being repetitive but this is my current project. four weeks full of shitty 'feedback') -
Having this stress at work especially when they monitor your performance during the WFH . Not doing rocket science or stuffs. but angular front end dev.
api dependency was delayed.
Stuck at some bugs which I think user can never reproduce but a tester did.
All of them is busy with their own ML stuffs and impediments.
Having issues with staying home and work. I dont know this is just me or someone else having the same issue. I am just trying to share. Anything you wanna add? -
Okay, so debian is just fucked by default then.
Created a Debian 10 persistence stick, and I'm having the fucking xorg issues ("No screens detected", xrandr says the same) i've had every fucking time i've installed debian, except a simple round of dpkg-reconfigure isn't fixing it this time.
Suggestions?
Things tried:
- dpkg-reconfigure <every package even remotely related>
- X -configure
- installing all firmware from linux-firmware repo
- reinstalling everything remotely related (with both reinstall and purge/install)
- Wayland ("failed to create compositor backend")
- creating my own xorg configs and driver-radeon configs and all that shit with my screen explicitly defined
- remaking the stick with a redownloaded ISO
- actually installing it to a HDD first
- crying in frustration
- different monitors
- someone else's machine (both AMD GPUs, mine's an R9 380, his an RX 3-digit something-or-other)
- an NVIDIA card (other tester threw his old 1080TI in his PC, set up all the drivers and shit, and nothing fucking changed)
what is this, Fedora?3 -
Can you see that title of my resolved task properly? you damned click tester!!!! Just don't reopen my task
easily!!
Phew... thanks devRant. You always here. -
1. Finish personal pen-tester tool project and open-source it
2. Get eCPPT and OSCP certificateed
3. Finish bachelor degree in IT management
4. Get a proper full time dev job
5. Learn to utilize docker properly -
Calling QA/ Test managers for help !
Im a junior dev at a company where im slowly transitioning into also being our test lead. I just got my ISTQB foundation and im starting to write out the test strategy for our company.
Currently we’r doing alot of reactice testing, and to implement more proactive testing i wanted to implement a risk strategy as well.
Problem is that i feel this strategy takes too much time for our organization (doing risk analysis for each story we’r implementing just isnt possivle) , and we don’t have time for me actinh as a full time Test manager while also doing software dev tasks.
Question is: what good proactive strategies can we implement that doesnt require too much time investment - or could we use risk strategy only for specific stories implemented / custom orders / etc and stick with a reactive strategy solely ?
Later this yesr ill be sent on ISTQB test manager course to better qualify my position but until then id really want to get a test strategy somewhat implemented
Any help is MUCH appriciated!10
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