It happened again.

This time my colleague, is abbreviating "cumulative" as "cum" in a variable name, and now I have to control my 6th grade humor...

Worst meeting. Hmm..

Embarrassment wise maybe the one where my boss called me the queen of porn in front of everyone. Yes, classy AF. (Just have to know him to know his sense of humor I guess).

Most cringe worthy meeting was probably when our out of state national director came in and basically told us he has no clue what we do nor does her care to learn. We brought up salaries to him as well as we're in the bottom 8th percentile for the industry in our area with HUMONGOUS work loads, like 20 sites per developer at once. This is a huge multi-million dollar corporation, mind you. We told him some of us have to have 3 jobs to survive and he basically said well you're an at will employee so there's the door. He also took phone calls and sent emails during my one on one meeting which we never finished even though he promised to. But he bought us a shirt, so you know, it's all cool. 🙄

Hope you survived the Monday;)

As I promised, I’d like to post my comic series “Destory” here regularly.

A story about two devs and their funny but serious project, on the hype technology - the blockchain.

Fucking cringe ads with “programmer’s humor”

Some years ago i attended to a summer school abroad. I instantly built a connecection with this one girl, we spend the whole week together, talking, sharing humor, deep conversations etc. We also won the prize for the best project together. I guess it looked like the beginning of a love story for the rest of the course. For me it didn't exactly, actually I didn't had much romantic feelings for her; she was the arrogant, manipulative type I thought I could handle a friend but never as girl friend. We shared some darkness so to say. But I really hoped for a new close friendship. Since she had a boyfriend back home i thought she most likely wanted just the same. Anyway I was a bit worried she might want more because she made me quite a lot of compliments and told me how she liked me.
And yes, she wanted more: Whenever we talked on the phone after the summer school or met (she lived in a city not far away from mine by coincidence) she begged me for help with coding. She had a well paid as extremely interesting PHD position with a topic between political science and computer science. Besides classical humanities methods her topic would require a lot of coding though. But she had zero, absolutely zero clue of programming, and, as it turned out, zero interesst. I told her from the beginning she would have to learn quite a lot or pay someone to code for her. It was far too much to do as a favour by a friends or such. And, since it was part of her fucking PHD it would have been cheating somehow of she didn't do it herself. But instead, she kept texting me if I could 'help to fix some bugs', sending me unrelated code fragments she copied from SO and not even tried to understand. So I told her to fuck off at one point. After all it was not that we have been friends for decades; we only knew each other for a couple of months an spent only one week together. So thats it.
But I still think of it from time to time and it makes me angry because it feels like she was only nice to me because she thought i am this nerd guy who falls instantly in love to a charming good looking girl and does everything for her. I did neither at all but indeed wanted to be friends with her, thats bad enough. It even makes me more more angry that she actually has this awesome PHD project about politics in the fucking digital world and think of programmers like this. And that she will succeed without understanding anything bacause in the end there would have been a dude who did all the work for her I bet.

Some lessons need to be learned the hard way

Redeveet..

I might be getting too sassy for this racket.

I dedicate this to all of those hr gurus from top tech companies that rejected me cause they think I won’t fit their culture despite me crushing all their technical interviews, fuck them and their soft skills stupid questions.
I won’t fit there anyways cause I can express my own thoughts using sarcasm and irony and I’m not scared of doing it cause I don’t care about your amazing company culture that prefer robots not people with a little sense of humor. I don’t care about my failures cause there was so many I don’t give a fuck. And by the way if you ask me why I want to work in your amazing company I would always say cause you asked me to work for you and now you treat me like shit. Then 10 years later you blame everyone for toxic culture lol.

relatable

past time: Making jokes on programmer humor forums about the jokes being told on the humor forum.

fall out: Autists who don't get the joke of the joke and genuinely think they need to explain the original joke even though it is "obvious" it was a play on words.

struggle: Resisting explaining to them the joke on the joke. And if I break down and explain, trying not to be a condescending prick. Most of the time I don't respond.

Firefox,dfox,allfox,Fbfox,bla bla bla...

God is a Civil Engineer, a troll, and has a twisted sense of humor.

Why else would He put a sewage line through a recreational area?

I think if I was doing the design, I might go the same way. Sorry, not sorry.

When you wake up with a tension headache, you take something for it, everything is fine, the moment you sit in front of your desk, it comes right back with this horrible lack of empathy and care topped with the lovely lethargic feeling of burnout.. Yay me. I know what I have to do, I just really wish I could get a bit of slack once in a while.... - Packs shit to take to shit museum- psh maybe my internal error handling for slackoverflow is just too good 🤣

Met a girl in an app. She is hot 10/10. Sense of humor is 10/10. Empathy, integrity is 3/10. I’ve realized she is an addict of Marijuana. We’ve been talking for a month and she’s stood me up once. Then went traveling. Says she misses me. Then goes cold. And back and forth. This shit is a fucking headache. Just today she was stoned and telling me its not gonna work, I want kids and marriage and she can’t give me that. She sends me nudes and promises we will meet at the end of the month. This entire fucking thing is an emotional rollercoaster. I don’t feel the same at work. My productivity is suffering. My gut says to block her. And I fucking hate the thought of it but it’s right for my peace of mind and productivity. I just wonder how long I should fight since we have such fun conversations. I’ve lots all trust for her. She’s basically like a permanent fixture of my digital life it seems. And that’s depressing as hell. I’m giving her two weeks to show in my physical life otherwise I’ve set a date in my calendar where I must block. Addiction doesn’t even cut it, I feel addicted to this person. The jokes the laughter, the beauty. It’s torture.

"You're one hell of an exception I would like to try & catch"

What's your programmer pick up lines?

My co-working space was too loud, so I created an app to shush them automatically
(that's the name)

It actually worked :-)

One of you guys posted about having a score of 666, to which a bunch of people (myself included) started downvoting their posts to keep it that way. I wanted to remove my --'s later, but they deleted the post and I forgot their name, and now I feel bad. Can you please present yourself so I can undo my harm, dear victim of my humor?

The debate between using tabs or spaces for indentation in code is a long-standing argument among software developers. Those who prefer using tabs argue that it takes up less space and is more efficient, while those who prefer spaces argue that it allows for more consistency and easier readability.

Many developers have strong opinions on this issue and believe that their preferred method is the only correct one. Some even go as far as to say that using the wrong method can negatively impact their ability to work with the code.

Regardless of which side of the debate someone falls on, it's a common source of frustration and humor among developers. The argument often devolves into jokes and sarcastic comments, with both sides poking fun at the other's preferred method.

Despite the often lighthearted nature of the debate, it highlights the importance of code readability and maintainability, as well as the differences in personal preferences and workflows that can arise within the tech community.

!dev

A good conversation must be like a mini skirt. Short enough to cover the subject, long enough to retain the interest.

(Metà)

I hate the “life sucks and is meaningless ihihihi” millennial humor and I hate it even more when I find it here on DevRant