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Search - "baby"
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Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Baby: 204 No Content
Me: 200 OK
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Baby: 413 Payload Too Large
Me: 102 Processing
Me: 200 OK
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Baby: 444 Connection Closed Without Response
Me: 200 OK
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Baby: 444 Connection Closed Without Response
Me: 429 Too Many Requests
Me: GET /sleep
Baby: 307 Temporary Redirect
Me: 101 Switching Protocols
Me: 408 Request Timeout
GF: 102 Processing
Me: GET /sleep
Sleep: 404 Not Found
Me: 406 Not Acceptable
(Morning)
Me: 501 Not Implemented19 -
My partner has zero interest in coding and wants to have a baby, a week ago she started to yell install baby at me. Told her its not the right command. A few days ago she yelled apt-get install baby. Told her there was a user privilege problem. Today she came back with sudo apt-get install baby.
looks like we are going to have to have a baby!18 -
Guy: "We just can't finish this in 1 month!"
Boss: "Yeah you can, I'll hire more people."
Guy: "... You know, a woman can deliver a baby in 9 months but 9 women can't deliver a baby in 1 month."21 -
Me greeting a female friend with a joke: Hey baby, wanna play with my python?
Her: Only if it's well commented and production ready.
Me: I love you.
Her: I know.4 -
!rant
My wife just had our first child today. I guess I'll have to share my rubber duck from now on.11 -
I noticed that urban dictionary didn't have a definition for devRant.
So I posted one.
And it got rejected ):
*Bawls like a baby*
To the four people who will read this, if you're remotely close to being interested, let me know, I'll post it here.28 -
How about some good news for a change?
We have new baby! 😊 He's our second.
And he was born on 10/24!
He's going to be my little devvy.
😊😊😊45 -
So my girlfriend (non techie) just saw my rant about how I'd give her a baby if she knew how to close vim in a proper way (she saw me on devRant, asked me to show it and read my rants) and so I showed her vim so she'd get the joke.
I than told her, how it worked and such so she'd see how it's not a regular text editor and told her to try and quit it, and to my amazement, she did!
Guess she's a keeper :')11 -
I'm 40 years old today. Feels strange.. and getting older as a developer is not an advantage at all. But I got a wonderful little baby, a wife and a job I (almost always) like! So happy birthday to me 😊15
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Who Is Who
➡ A Project Manager is the one who thinks 9 women🙍 can deliver a baby in 1 month.👶
➡ An Onsite Coordinator is the one who thinks 1 woman can deliver 9 babies in 1 month.👶
➡ A Developer is the one who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver 1 baby.🙇
➡ A Marketing Manager is the one who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and women are available.👷
➡ A Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.👶
➡ A Tester is the one who always tells his wife that this is not the right baby. 🚶
Don't be shy.. Comment which 'who' are you..😂17 -
Project manager logic, explained with babies.
9 women can have 9 babies in 9 month. We only need one baby.
Deadline is one month!12 -
About 11 months I posted that my wife was pregnant. I now have upgraded to son 1.0. All without writing any tests!14
-
If you hire nine women to make a baby, you won't get a baby in one month.
But if you hire one woman a month and impregnate her immediately, it will still take you nine months to get the first baby, but after that you'll get one baby per month for the rest of the year.
That's the difference between latency and throughput (and that's also how pineapple farms work, since it can take up to a year to grow pineapples).11 -
Wish me luck guys I think this is it. I'm going to be financially set for real this time woohoo! Big thanks to my man billy6
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Living in a tiny house and having a remote-only job (and no lappy) means I get the wonderful, lovely privilege of working in my bedroom... with my 18mo (who will not leave me alone), and my girlfriend (who won't fucking leave). It's positively great!
Blasting music is often not enough to drown out the sound, and certainly does nothing for getting hit with toys or screamed at to get picked up, so I get basically nothing done during the day. And that's presupposing I'm not begged to run errands/go to lunch with her, both of which take precious hours. (She won't take the baby out alone, so she's always here unless we find a babysitter)
At least it's quiet after 9pm, so I stay up coding for as long as I can. But 18mo's wake up super early, and the girlfriend prefers to stay in the room until I'm up... so even with earplugs I don't get enough sleep. A monster a day and a bottle of Tito's vodka a month is all that keeps me sane.
Why can't I just be fucking left alone to fucking work? I'm our only goddamn source of income.
It's no wonder we're fucking broke.
And to make matters worse, I'm being downsized... and considering the above, I doubt I'll be able to land a new job. 😡15 -
Built my own Amazon Echo with a raspberry pi because they aren't available in my country. Decided to pick up an official Echo Dot while in America but I'm too proud of my little project to tear it down and use the official thing haha9
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My girlfriend knows me so well 😂 She got me a baby coding duck in a bottle (bought at the Boston Tea Party museum, nickel for scale) 😍6
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This morning I WILL code! I WILL finish that multimillion pound idea!! I CAN DO IT!!!!!!!.....then wife and baby wake up 😣6
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Girlfriend: There are so many passwords to remember, man. What's my amazon password, baby?
Me: Just use a password manager?
Girlfriend: That sort of thing exists?12 -
$Me: *whispers* Do you like it rough baby?
$Her: *moans* uhuh
$Me: *continues whispering* I'm gonna implement a dynamic programming algorithm for you.
$Her: ahhhhhhh yaass *looses control of her body*
Fictional scenario of course I'd never implement shit for nobody who isn't paying.4 -
So, more people = more effective?
Let's see how you can deliver a baby with 9 women with only 1 month
P. S:Good luck with that!!6 -
Right hand working on that "billion dollar" website idea of mine; Left hand holding our 4month baby who won't sleep when put down!!!!6
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So, this baby just arrived :)
Now every game I can think of... Nahh, we all know that this helps you in programming by giving you some power9 -
What's up with guys and girls using the 'def' word? It's like they're speaking Python.
guy: "sup babe. Wanna grab coffee later?"
girl: "def baby"8 -
Article title: "Mastering React component composition using children"
<image of a couple holding a baby>
Image caption: "Parents with child."
**Reads the title again**
Wait what?4 -
That moment when you are at the hospital and your wife just gave birth. Boss is calling:
-Hi! congratulations on a baby!
-Thanks.
-I need something quick from you...
*connects me to live presentation with a client*
I said "Hi everyone!" and ended the call...
Didn't pick up since..6 -
I was 5 and he was 6
We rode on horses made of sticks
He wore #000 and I wore #FFF
He would always win the fight
! !, he shot me down
! !, I hit the ground
! !, that awful sound
! !, my baby shot me down6 -
Ive just bought a domain name for my nephew of now 36 hours old. Ive a really common lastname and it took me 8 years to get a domainname with my name in it.
By the time he is ten (or how old they will be when they get their first email address) he will have his own personalized email and when they learn the basics of programming he can use his own domain for his site.8 -
Babies get 100+ points.
💡 I just need to make a baby and I'll have my stress ball!
Baby firstBorn = new Baby("Tommy");
firstBorn.setAppearance = "adorable";
😅12 -
if a recruiter calls me one more time about an "exciting opportunity" 500 miles away, I'm gonna punch a baby in the face.7
-
So we got our first household Alexa yesterday and my brothers have been asking it silly things, like:
Brother: Alexa sing baby shark:
Alexa: <sings baby shark>
B: Alexa sing mummy shark
A: <sings mummy shark>
B: Alexa sing daddy shark
A: <sings daddy shark>
B: Alexa sing grandma shark
A: "I think that's enough, even I have my limits"
Fucking Brilliant!!!4 -
hello everybody..
just want to say that I was busy those days in being a father fir the first time.. totally new feelings 😁3 -
Ah, new feature submission to app store day.
- Tests passing = check!
- App built = check!
- App manually tested = check!
- App store content = check!
- Boilerplate answers to the same 6 questions from PM, every time we go through this = check!
Ready to go baby!! -
So I saw a lot of people showing off their servers. That's the baby we setup for our uni project. :)7
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This is just like me when I play with my baby niece to remove some stress from work. Effectively recharges me and can code again even if I'm tired29
-
My wife left to pick up our oldest kid from school and to later buy her outfits to start ballet.
I work from home, but am still on work hours. I sit on the couch next to our baby that is sleeping.
my wife when she leaves: look, she's asleep, just bring your laptop here and try to work.
me: ok I will
(10 minutes later)
me: ok I'll get the laptop now
me: *get up, pick the laptop, sit down again*
baby: wakes the fuck up
I swear to god this thing has fucking movement sensors.2 -
I’m a baby and for some reason thought that bootstrap would take too long to learn :/ just learned, redesigned and implemented an entire site using bootstrap in like an hour :/
Y am i like this5 -
Behold, my 34 year old little baby (more like big daddy), the Acorn Electron. Still running fine but god is that BASIC awful.7
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The description of my company should be, "where 9 people can make a baby in 1 month, but it is going to be one ugly fuck"2
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1. get a job interview in google
2. design a kitchen
3. ???????
4. the kitchen is for a giraffe
5.?!?!?!!?
6. new kitchen
7. a baby giraffe
8.??!?!?!??!??!??!??!??!??!??!?!?
9. we will call you
10. __time passes__
11. no call
12.X_X14 -
Couple of weeks ago I posted that I failed my first interview by phone. Today I got the news that I'm hired at a different company for my first development job. Python here I come baby5
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Me: *rewrites chunk of code*
"Time to test this baby. This is gonna fail spectacularly"
Code: *works*
Me: "Fuck!"5 -
Baby asleep, headphones pumping, beer poured, ready to code my MERN stack application :-)......20mins later still on dev rant!!! :-(3
-
My productivity hack? Exercise.
It's amazing what a good workout can do after a long day of work. The stress just melts away and i sleep like a baby!! Ready to rock and roll the next day. 😎4 -
Me: I have to switch to linux, this windows sucks. *click restart
Windows: where are you going baby3 -
Boss reasoning: 9 woman can deliver a baby in one month.
My response: 9 man cum in your mother pussy and she delivered you in one month too.
welp, I said that just in my mind of course 🤐5 -
Having a baby while starting an IT company and learning IT at the same time.
Found myself crying and swinging a bat, listening to Limp Bizkit as i remembered what it felt to be 13 and being made fun of coz i hadn't kissed a girl yet.8 -
Pathetic dev moments: Any time my macbook fans rev up, I worry that I'm working my baby too hard, so I start closing applications.3
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IT Definitions of Designations
Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month.
Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.
Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.
Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
Resource Optimization Team thinks they don't need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources.
Documentation Team thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered, they'll just document 9 months.
Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with a delivered baby.
Tester is a person who always tells that this is not the Right baby.
HR Manager is a person who thinks that...a Donkey can deliver a Human Baby - if given 9 Months -
I can repair an electronic item, write code and debug. Has a degree in CS so why do I have to ask the wife "baby, how do you operate the washing machine?"5
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my 8 month old on her stroller at the grocery:
*cries in screaming*
*is scared of unrecognized faces*
every single old person we pass by:
let's grinstare this thing right on its fucking face.
baby: *cries harder*
old fuck: uh oh, time to go4 -
Got an assignment for my OOP class, looked at it, laughed, "haha this is baby stuff I could code this by farting on the keyboard"
Wrote 400 lines of code without debugging
🙃.... Why do I do this to myself?3 -
That moment when...
You’re supposed to be doing work.
You have a deadline.
It’s your sister’s baby shower and you promised to help.
Sis comes over every day to hang with family.
I’ve still not managed to get any work done today, video games and hanging and baking have had my time 🤣
I was up from 12-1 making jelly shots from scratch because my mum wanted blue ones and couldn’t find any blue jelly 😂
They’re bubblegum and for my first attempt I think they look pretty sick.
Will have to find out whether they set in the morning 🙈2 -
Goals For 2019:
- Lose 15~20 Kg on weight
- Learn some NodeJS, react and react native.
- Create a decent Portfolio
- Plan for my own project
- Wait for my new unborn yet baby6 -
Oxford Dicktionary: A Project Manager is simply a person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month.
-
Would you rather program one handed because...
A). Broken arm.
B). Holding screaming baby that slaps keyboard occasionally.6 -
Me: "You could try using Redis, cache that baby and try and squeeze some speed"
Dev: "Hun?! Should I use it on the front end or the back end?"
Well... Webdev is not his thing to be fair!4 -
Slept for two hours tonight because of my baby girl... I've been staring at the same piece of code for an hour or so.. Had 2 double espressos.. Didn't work.. Ppl talking to me and im like...4
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We were having some complications;
Then I said, c'mon baby don't disappoint me.
Thereafter my old Pentium 4 PC booted up with ease.2 -
Life Hack: don't use alcohol or chemicals, rub off glue residue easily with olive oil / baby oil
Works like a charm and also doesn't break cardboard videogame boxes/ book covers9 -
In 9 months time there is going to be an enormous worldwide baby boom, which will cause panic buying, shortages, and mass maturnity /paternity leave.
And the new generation will be called the coronials.2 -
Tfw GitHub app is forcing you to push to master and you do so because you're an idiot, and your agnostic ass starts praying to god(s) nothing goes wrong.2
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Ever have those fucking days where you want to “chair-to-face” every should-have-been condom baby that crosses your path?
Fuck I want to get off this roller coaster ride already... Only a few more months.
Get the fuck out of my way, Martha... Your mother should have swallowed.1 -
What is the weirdest shit you have seen in a daily stand-up?
I've just seen a baby horse being born on the daily stand-up.9 -
have you ever felt that you enjoyed and loved your job and coding, then after a while all of the joy, contentment and vigor just left together with the wind?
Well I have, and let me tell you the story of my peope and the feature whirlpool drain of death, slowly `agile`ing you to the death of creativity.
First everything was seemingly good, Its your product, a baby that every one is contributing to make, a great idea in the making.
Fastforward after the baby was fully materialize, and you are watching his first step, usually you are happy seeing his slow growth. But ITS A BIG FUCKING NO. He wants the baby to go faster, bigger and stronger, more than what he can chew. Then you watch as the baby grew into an abomination. A monster of undistinguishable and parts. It grew inhumanly large. BUT it never grew and it never matured. The baby sits there, and were just here injecting all sorts of stuff just to make his father happy. But the end of the day he will ask more and more and more, until the cycle goes on. The baby grows but does not mature, and were here trying to make his father accept the baby. But NO he like more. Sadly we have no power over this. we are mere slaves of the fathers bidding. his bitches, tools and nothing more...:(4 -
trying to get steam to work on arch with nvidia
pray for me
if you have tips let me hear em :`)
specs (my asus baby)
· Core i7
· 16G ddr3 RAM
· GeForce 745m
+ 256G ssd & 1T hdd
+ 1920x1080 display (unknown refresh rate)13 -
At home, on standing desk made mostly out of cardboard and hope, with 5 month old daughter asleep and attached to me with a sling1
-
Looking for some advice....
So I'm a web dev that works remotely full time from home which I love, I'm expecting my first child in late march which is really exciting but I'm starting to think about how it's all going to work with the missus home for at least 12 months and of course a baby that (without sounding horrible) is going to be a big distraction to me when I'm trying to work.
So just wanted to know if there was anyone else out there in a similar position or that has gone through the same thing and how you did it? Is there any advice you can give me?
Appreciate any thoughts.13 -
anyone ever had a relative download a virus and when confronted about it they say no? even though you specifically told them not to open weird looking emails.
well, pops apparently did NOT open a ransomware email 😂 Baby, bye, bye, bye... to all the files6 -
My girl friend was complaining that I care more about programming than her.
I told her,
"Trust me baby, in the array of my interests you are [1]."
She was satisfied.3 -
Found this MongoDB song on Youtube today.
Database Skills (Sia Cheap Thrills Parody) - MongoDB.
Baby, I know your database needs upgrades tonight.
https://youtube.com/watch/... -
I just found out google web dev tools let you copy a request as curl command!
Time to scrape some websites baby!8 -
My favorite home-written script is `sudo thermonuke` which basically kills all the proliferation of Chrome tabs I've opened, as well as kills every other app I leave open on my desktop carelessly. It's a bit brash, but nuke and pave baby. Nuke and pave.2
-
How awesome is that! NASA's Mars rover software is available on Github: https://github.com/nasa-jpl/.... Also impressive: Github uses WebGL to render 3D previews of STL files! https://github.com/nasa-jpl/....
21st century, baby!4 -
Someone is whining about how hard Git is in an article they wrote. They work for GitHub. The article was posted to HN.
Yes, let's make things so easy a literal baby can do it.16 -
Baby I don't need dollar bills to have fun tonight ~
I love cheap clients ~
Baby I don't need dollar bills to have fun tonight ~
I love shit bugs ~1 -
squashed a spider this evening just to have it erupt with hundreds of tiny baby spiders.
what a terrifying real world visualization of my week.2 -
By the time I’m able to put my baby girl to sleep, I get hungry again.....
I just remembered, I haven’t had pizza in a long time now...11 -
In Russian “and now it’s Vista, baby” (а стала Виста, бэйби) sounds just like the iconic Terminator catchphrase. There’s a great meme about upgrading from XP to Vista based on it5
-
Raining outside, the office all to myself. The entire building is empty and here I am jamming to Volbeat while I finish some stuff for monday.
It sounds as If i am complaining, but I am not, i love this me time that I get at the end of every Friday (we leave at 12 but I stay about 3 hours extra to fuck around)
I love this shit. Boss got us pizza yesterday and there is still some left.
And i got some tobacco with me . This is some good shit my dudes. Good shit2 -
Every tech-related company sell more and more swag : tshirt, hoodies, GitLab even sell socks and Docker baby stuff.
Do any of them sell underwear ?!6 -
My new home office.
I haven't posted on DevRant in a while so thought I would share my new home office set up.
My old set up was great. Dual screen standing desk, fast desktop and great monitors.
Since having a new baby a few months back, the home office is now a nursery. My only option is to sit at the kitchen table or stand in the kitchen (I prefer standing).
So here it is, my new office. Laptop on a kids toy box, fit snugly between chopping boards and tomatoes.
And hey, I don't actually mind at all, I love my family.
Just remember that when life gives you tomatoes 🍅 ...5 -
Starting to hate Codeblocks with a passion, as it crashes randomly for utterly no reason at all. Vim baby, you were always the one for me.3
-
An ad of items on sale in a store:
Bath toys for babies, buy 1, get a second one for 1 $...
One of the toys is a rubber duck..
I don't have a baby...still considering 😂4 -
ZAYN : Baby, let me be your man.
BABY : No let, only const.
...
Disclaimer : it's a JavaScript joke.
😂😂😂😂3 -
I think I just discovered what happens when two buzzwords have a baby...
https://cnet.com/news/...
Seriously what the fuck did I just watch. Consume this media at your own risk.5 -
I've always heard about the "if one woman can deliver a baby in 9 months, 9 can do it in a month" situation people got in. But my bos just quoted that to me since we are stuck on deadlines.2
-
I can't tell if I'm being a baby - but I asked for a specific sub-domain for a reason / and they gave me a domain that looks too similar to local and live - just like I was trying to avoid... : /3
-
Baby all I want for Christmas is Uuuuuuuuu-I design that made sense while being cute.
Late I know. But I just thought of it.1 -
These days now, my boss trusts me so much and takes my opinions and suggestions and goes ahead with those. Not to mention so lenient with me regarding work times since I had the baby. I’m melting thinking about her.2
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I still do exist, long time no see, fellow Devs! How is it going?
Didn't posted here in long time. Anything new relevant? I just started studying at an university. Hoping to post again here.14 -
What a distraction from SO.
it makes me remember youtube. *Open some IT stuff video, 15 minutes lates, watch how a giraffe giving her baby..2 -
Yeah this baby got completed at last💗
(I hope the gif isn't too much pixelated)
Maybe i should write an article for it.😅5 -
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says: “Ugh, that’s the ugliest baby I’ve ever seen!” The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming. She says to a man next to her: “The driver just insulted me!” The man says: “You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I’ll hold your monkey for you.”2
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Started playing around with Kotlin and holy shit! It feels like java and js had a baby, but it's actually not a brain-dead pile of crap and works well. I'm sold!
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Holy shit I had no idea we can use content: attr() in pseudo elements in css! It's a whole new world baby!2
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When your PM is whining like a baby about resource issues surrounding developing new features when he/she already agreed one of the teams top priorities was getting "run the business" work done.
-
felt like it is 1998 ..
vSphere app only available as a Windows exe while my baby is a MacBook,,
Ended up with multilayers
OS X
->
Virtual box
->
Windows10
->
vSphere
Damn these 6 hr n/w installations
Who the hell just does a win only app .. #fail4 -
$test = TRUE;
$baby = TRUE;
$egg = 1
$sperm = 1;
if ($test != 'TRUE') {
print "No Baby.";
} else {
foreach($eggs as $egg)
{
$baby = count($egg + $sperm);
return $baby;
printf("Congratulations");
}
}10 -
I have to wake up in the morning ....for a meeting.........
When was the last time I woke up in the morning? Oh that was before having the baby. -
Doctor: "I have some news about your baby."
Parents: "Don't tell us the gender, we want to keep it a surprise."
Doctor: "Oh I get it, you're those type of people. Okay, well IT is not breathing."4 -
Inspired by a programming is a constant/continuous thing. Every small and big achievements, from squishing a bug, finding a workaround, pressing the "Build" button and the programme runs. Each time the brain feels expanded like when a baby discovers new things, a tiny creature in a gigantic Universe of endless possibilities.
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Some managers think if one woman can deliver a baby in 9 months, then two can deliver a baby in 4 and a half...1
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begging another team to fix the thing they own , that i am not familiar with, that i am being paged about
getting ghosted, baby!3 -
I know by heart that "premature optimization is the root of all evil" but not when I'm coding, no! I premature optimize the shit out of my code until I get crippled down and then I undo everything and make a working version no matter how terrible it is.6
-
Found two different variables used in two different ways "profileCard" and "porfileCard" Sweet baby jesus1
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Has anyone said WhatsApp and fb are parting their ways or its just the founders leaving the baby with fb?1
-
I just road about 400km in a 150cc motorbike between yesterday and today to pick my notebook from the assistance shop. Oh my god, feels good to be home. Now with my baby boy recovered :)2
-
Sam:- What are you doing??
Richard:- recording a baby's voice!
Sam:- why??
Richard:- when he grows up, I shall ask him what he meant by this
Sam:-😶😶😶2 -
!rant
For the first time ever I actually did well on a Computer Science test. I didn't even hand it in with any errors. It's the baby steps of progress that make me feel pretty happy. -
Waiting on a baby girl in a few weeks from today! Excited! Scared!
Any other future/current dads with babies with tips on how to handle a work from home with a baby?6 -
whenever I ask for PR/MR reviews.
I know I shouldn't. I can't help myself. I present my work, my baby, for their trial.9 -
Walked up to my girl and dropped this:
"Hey baby, are you a TCP Connection? Cause you look like a SYNACK"
Oh yeah, WOOOOOOOOoooo!9 -
Code is a highly detailed description of what a computer should do. If that description becomes inaccurate we will remove inaccurate parts. Take pride in writing good code, recognize that it was useful for a while, but don’t get attached to it. It will stay in the git history.
If you see code as your baby, know that the team might need to kill your baby.1 -
Ernest Hemingway and @bittersweet once competed in whose shortest story is the saddest. Ernest wasn't original, boasting his old "baby shoes" charade. But @bittersweet, proving the culture is changed, and new talent beats the old, won, with this story of his:
"CTO is wanted by YC unicorn. Requirements: PHP 5.4".1 -
Google and TikTok sitting is a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G
First comes love, then comes marriage
Then comes a baby in a baby carriage
---
I see this every time I need to manually update some apps...19 -
I don't need to improve. I am the best Dev.
..Just kidding. But I don't, really. My life is too busy at the moment with the baby and my side hobby that I'm slowly becoming a bad Dev.5 -
So this cat (stray) used to come with her baby kitten, for food. Mama always fed the baby first, licked her, protected her....
Fast forward, now the baby kitten is all grown up. Now if she comes near mamas food, she gets growls and a nasty smack from mama cat. :D :D -
Had an skype job interview, at some point the interviewer asked me to tell a joke. I told a dead baby joke. I dont know normal jokes. I am not normal either. Dont think he enjoyed it.3
-
VS Code. It caresses my code as a mother caresses its baby, it keeps it safe while I'm not there and tantalizes my senses like few other editors do.
Also, it's fast and aesthetically pleasing. -
Dev boy to Dev girl: "What's the time complexity on you loving me, baby?"
Dev girl: while(iExist){
Int n = Random.Next(1, 100);
for(int i =1; i < n^4; i++){
Console.Write("..."); } }
Dev boy: Assert.Fail(); -
Is there any other programmer that started as an architect (building architect, not IT)?
I'm divided between two different careers and working around 15hours a day because I can't focus on one. Is this a normal thing?
I work as an architect for the past 6 years and were always interested in the technology part of it.
Soon I got to be a BIM coordinator and started using Dynamo for Revit.
After that, I got involved in learning Python and now start studying web dev (front-end)
Programming is very addictive! I get it now why IT people stay in their dorm like it's a cave
In architecture there's always a client you need to make happy, while in programming I create things the away I want them to be, without all the boring formalities that I am used to.
I can learn it for free and there's a huge community to help on it. All careers should be like this.
I'm happy, but really tired 😪 my social life is resumed to hanging out with my dogs5 -
Pink Floyd:
Did they get you to trade
Your heroes for ghosts?
Hot ashes for trees?
Hot air for a cool breeze?
Cold comfort for change?
Did you exchange
A walk-on part in the war
For a lead role in a cage?
Led Zeppelin:
Mommy mommy MOMMY MOMMY BABE BABE BABE BABY BABY BABY MAMA MAMA MAMA MAMA BABY YEEEEEEEAAA MY LOVE MY LOVE MAMA MAMA BABY BABY -
I just started to learn metaprogramming with C++, and it's awesome. But sometimes I make errors which make me feel like if I'm a baby :o (use 0 instead of 0_c...)
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Wound up talking about baby names with a friend
Apparently wanting to name my hypothetical future daughter Buffy is ridiculous13 -
algolia.com is a piece of fucking shit, trying to use the search on the reasonml forms just pisses me off and makes me want to punch a baby in the face!!!4
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Guy in the cubicle infront off, walks off early, later we hear his wife had a baby
i didn't even know she was pregnant3 -
Moving my baby into prod this morning. I find that the louder my headphones are, the less I can hear myself freaking out.
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After a deep day my wife and I came up with our project for steady income to allow me quit work for the first 2 years after the baby is born.3
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I’m thinking of replacing my dev duck with baby yoda.
Btw he’s 50 years old, and I bet his psychic abilities could help me run my code better.5 -
Old but gold.
"Project manager is a Person who thinks nine women can deliver a baby in One month."
"Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby." -
So, a month ago I ranted about windows update, because I had to backup my virtual machine and windows killed it.
Well, Asus needed "only" 4 weeks to replace my fkn Mainboard and now I have my baby back 😄
OK. Now I deactivated the Windows update completely. 70gb, incoming! -
A medium knockoff - but I can only invite people I know to write as having the ever-so prestigious blog master title. I built it from the ground up with next js and it is my lil baby 🥰2
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!rant
We got a new Macbook pro, 2017 model, i was all excited for it, my 2 coworkers and the manager not so much. But being that I am the only one that knows how to use it and will be working on new web related tech as well as advising our contractors and helping them with the ios and android part it was decided that I shall use this baby. So fucking excited. I get to use this baby at work as well as the overpowered work station that they already gave me :] dis gon b good manerant gon buy another one eat it fk it i already have one at home aewe yii it came with everything not mine tho love me a macbook didnt pay for it1 -
its kinda comforting knowing that even professional developers google shit because if i don't practice for even a day i forget everything ive ever learned2
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Does anyone know how i can get rid of the rounded window corners?
using elementaryOS with no theme, though i plan to either add Flatabulous or Arc as a theme.
I want sharp corners, not this baby-proofed round mess i currently have going on 😂1 -
That feeling when the feature your team developed needs to be transferred to the other site team. Someone's taking our baby 😭.
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Me: Baby, I'll do anything you want.
She: I want to exit Vim. Please hel......*me interrupting in between*
Me: Except that, bitch.1 -
So I have to install chromium because line isn't available for linux...
Line is far east messaging/social app, and new customers use it.6 -
In the mean time if she starts a company, we can say she made a baby and company, both in an year.1
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Me to my code:
"""
Baby can I run you tonight?;
And maybe if told you the right words;
Wooo at the right place;
We'll debug... X2;
""" -
Just clearing through some of my old stuff and found my first word processor computer, might have to crank this old baby up...
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"Designing something is like having a baby. Asking me to try another design once I’ve birthed something amazing is like asking me to put the baby back in the womb and try again. That never works out for anyone." - Chad McMillan
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Interesting definitions
1. Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine Women can deliver a baby in One month.
2. Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.
3. Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single Woman can deliver nine babies in one month.
4. Client is the one who doesn’t know why he wants a baby.
5. Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.
6. Resource Optimization Team thinks they don’t Need a man or woman; They’ll produce a child with zero resources.
7. Documentation Team thinks they don’t care whether the child is delivered, they’ll just document 9 months.
8. Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce a baby.
9. Tester is a person who always tells his wife that this is not the Right baby. -
When coding in bed late at night, sometimes the cat mewls outside the door.
Unfortunately she sounds like the baby from Eraserhead and damnit if that isn't off-putting :/
It's creepy as hell. -
So many changes over the past few months. Transitioning from a freelance logo / print / packaging designer. Going full stack web developer. Even switched from adobe CC to Sketch for my design needs. What a ride. Everything I come across is new territory. I’m like a newborn baby. The struggle.
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Romeo and Juliet
Are together in eternity
40,000 men and women everyday
Another 40,000 coming everyday
We can be like they are, come on, baby
Don't fear the Reaper, baby, take my hand
Don't fear the Reaper, we'll be able to fly
Don't fear the Reaper, baby, I'm your man2 -
I somehow highly doubt the effectiveness of this treatment... if it did work I'm pretty sure we would all have baby faces with the amount of RF signals we're exposed to in a day. Do you think there is any legitimacy to this claim?4
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Jesus Fucking Christ can you just guess what the code is doing instead of me feeding it to you like a fucking baby. TRY TO HAVE SOME SORT OF INTUITION DAMNIT I’M TRYING TO HELP YOU SO YOU DON’T LOOK LIKE A DUMBASS.2
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Helloooo everyone! I've been afk from devRant for some time because of exams. How have you guys been?
Here's a picture of my favorite program, Letterbomb. Thought I'd include it because I kept thinking about it for a while.3 -
I did it, I found the fountain of youth. It is the cat fountain in my living room. Tragically, it was discovered by my daughter.
When she grabbed onto it, I tried to pry her off. But I was too late, she was nothing but a baby when I succeeded.
My wife likes to claim she was a baby before grabbing onto it, but what the fuck does she know.2 -
I'm in a GoToMeeting with a client right now and her baby is screaming into the microphone. Boy, I sure do love working with clients.1
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So Yeah, Feel like i am gonna be alone and depressed . I am reaching nowhere. zero baby. big zeeero still7
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Be instrumental in the creation of the first Human-AI baby, and it'll bring our two worlds together!
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A couple weeks back I rewrote some of CopilotChat so that it'd think it was an AI kindergarten teacher for baby AIs and asked it why humans went extinct.
Got a Microsoft warning ⚠️ saying a dangerous response had been detected1 -
Emacs is the reason why I screw my own agenda for Saturday, but sweet baby Jesus the mode-line now looks H O T for sure1
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Find a simple project that I think would fit the technology and Google how to so every single baby step I think my application will need to do.
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Even though we have this document we called "Blueprint" to close the deal with the client, they still changing a lot of logic in the end.
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So can't get my games editor to resize the editor room size when you change the window size but can rescale the GUI layer perfectly fine... Fuck this shit, spent too long trying to render and resize using 2 layer so fuck it, all on the GUI baby!2
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Last course complete! It's summer leave baby! Oh, and then that full time job as well... But hey, still!
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Two things I don't understand:
1) The fact that adult aren't allowed to buy kid's meal, even when they're paying it.
2) Baby/kids clothes being similar or more expensive to adult clothes when they require less materials.9 -
Development environments , OS and even languages may change but as long as I got my Sennheisers I can say "Bring it on baby"
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hugest shit came out of my asshole. i felt like giving birth to a monster baby shit cause i had to push so hard so my asshole can stretch wide enough for the monster to come out23
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goddamnshitmotherfuckingshit wtf brain? why do all the examples just work, but my code looking similar just doesn´t. why the fuck is this basic thumbsucking baby topic of a scrollable canvas screwing me over since this morning?2
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Not dev related but reasons for taking a week old baby on a flight: go!
You have 3 hours till I land3 -
I wish there is an open source alternative to forge or serverpilot. Not to use on production servers but for local development environment.
Yes, I'm not a command line person.4