!rant. Sometimes, trolling your fam is a lot of fun.
Just today my sister asked me how to type the character ÷ on her keyboard. I told her to press : and the - key and then just move it like so.

: -
: -
: -
:-
÷

See? Ez pz. She actually tried it and just said 'i cant, it erases everything'. And then all of my other siblings kept ranting the same thing. I forgot we were in group chat. And now its full of : and - spams. And im just here laughing my ass out.

C'mon guys, it's really not that hard

Source: Reddit

A client called me today saying their custom website I built for them is down. It just shows a 403 error now. They said they just wanted to update the prices. I asked what changes they made before it crashed. She said, "I couldn't figure out how to change the prices, so I just installed Wordpress, and now it doesn't work!" They completely deleted the entire website using cPanel and replaced it with a partially installed Wordpress.🤦

Before iPads took over the general population of home computing, I used to do house calls to help people with their computers for some extra folding money. One day I get a call from a regular saying that ever since I last worked on his computer it won't stay on.

He says it comes on for a few seconds, then just shuts down. It never did that before I upgraded the RAM.

So I drive over to his house and turn on the computer. He says, "See, it starts fine, but in a few seconds it'll just shut off. Just watch"

The computer boots up without any issues.

He says, "Well, of course it doesn't do it now that you're here!"

I reboot it a few times, boots fine every time. Suddenly I realize what's going on. I say to him, "Hey, why don't you try turning it on for me?"

He says, "What difference will that make?"

I say, "Just trust me, turn it on."

He bends down, presses the power button, looks up at the monitor and watches it boot. But he doesn't release the button! He just keeps holding it down until it shuts off.

"See!" he says, "why does it only do that when I turn it on!"

I then have to explain to him how holding down the power button forces a shutdown.

But, it never did that before I worked on it!

My boss asked me if he could smoke one before starting the interview. So I went down with him and lighted one up as well. Then we started to talk as if we were friends since years after I told him I like to drink alcohol from time to time (he asked :D) . Afterwards he just asked me if I know Java and stuff and I was like "sure ez pz". We still have drinking competitions on every company event. Best boss ever

Why on Earth are printer drivers so huge? Seriously, 1GB to print, Epson? There are entire distros of Linux that take up less than that!

Client: Could you build me a clone of this app? *Link to an app that probably took a full team of developers a year to build*

Me: What's your budget look like for this?

Client: About 500 bucks.

Pretty much a daily conversation.

A friend bought a new PC and asked me to help him set it up. He said he got everything working except the CD drive. He said it took him forever just to figure out how to get the keyboard and mouse to work. "I mean, have you ever owned a computer where the keyboard and mouse had to plug into the monitor instead of the computer?"

He bought a desktop PC, and and all-in-one thinking it was a monitor. He had the HDMI going from the all-in-one to the desktop, and was trying to use the CD drive on the desktop.

Wish you could've seen his face when I unplugged the desktop computer and his "monitor" didn't shut off. He looked at the desktop, and then the all-in-one, and said, "Wait... How is it still on?"

He also had his old USB wifi plugged into the desktop thinking that's what was providing him with an internet connection.

This pretty much sums up what I accomplished today.

I've always liked the idea of a virus that attacks other viruses. An antivirus virus, if you will. It would infect a computer and clean out all the malware and perform a bunch of random system improvements, then delete itself without a trace. To the end user, one day their computer would suddenly start running a little better for no apparent reason.

Whomever invented regular expressions was both a genius and a madman.

Welcome to the C# open-source community. That'll be $900.

I decided to redo the padding on my chair because it was getting uncomfortable. All the screws they used to put it together were at least half an inch too long. I was basically sitting on nails.

I'm absolutely fed up with all documentation being tutorial-based these days! Well written documentation doesn't start with you creating a new project from scratch.

This is basically how all of Microsoft's documentation starts: Step 1 - Open Visual Studio. Step 2 - Create a new project...

I just checked out their WPF samples repository, and about 8 of the projects won't even compile. Absolutely ridiculous. There's 205 projects in the repository, and of course the one I need is on the list of those that won't compile.

My app made 18% more in 2019 than it did in 2018. I want to keep that going, and I'm working on another app I hope to publish this year.

It was sometime in 2009. I kept seeing these ads for something called Bitcoin. I had some extra cash, so I decided to buy $100 worth. I had my debit card out, and was trying to figure out how it worked. Got distracted with a work email, and decided to put it off until later. I forgot all about it until around 2013 when I read about some guy that bought a house using $70 worth of Bitcoin he bought in 2009.

lol, I just got an email from HBO Max that said, "this email template is for integration testing only."

I accidentally set the width and height of a rectangle to zero in my code, and my program drew a circle. Interesting outcome.

I guess Motorola decided to join the Slow Down Your Device So You'll Buy The Next Model club. I had a Moto G5s Plus I bought not too long ago. I mainly use it for debugging now.

I mean, can't prove anything, all I can say for certain is their last update, literally, the final one they plan on releasing for that model, made the device so slow it was useless.

So I unlocked it and put LineageOS on it. Not easy, since there's no official build for it. Once I got it working, all the issues with the stock firmware vanished. It runs faster than it ever has.

Now I get greeted with a message when it boots telling me that the device was unlocked and can't be trusted, because, you know, we can all trust cell phone manufacturers to not put a bunch of spyware on our phones.

Oh for crying out loud, people, stop making apps that clear your clipboard when you close them!

So our sales rep got this email from some random dude yesterday (jan 12) saying he wants a simple webpage with a video background and some shit and that it's upmost important that it's done by jan 21.
Ignoring the fact that we are busy af, i thought well yeah it's doable. A simple onepager with some nice elements and some shit, ez pz.
In the email he also sent a link to a website simmilar to what he wants (as an example i presume) and it turned out to be a fully functional blog, a medium sized webshop (by the looks of it) and a whole lot of other stuff.
He didn't state a budget but seeing his demands I'd say his budget isn't much more than a couple of hundred €.

The dev before me stored all the emails and passwords as plain text in the database. This is not good. Not good at all.

Which key would, or did you choose?

Cherry MX red, brown, blue, green, clear, black, silent red, silver, or Zealio 67g?

I'm deciding for my custom keyboard. Big decision to make. It's not going to be cheap. Just looking for some feedback.

I was logged into an account just now. On the "My Account" page, there was a button that said, "Manage Subscription." I clicked it. Instead of just opening the subscription page, it opened the help page in a new tab showing me how to manage my subscription. No mention anywhere about how to actually get to the subscription page. All I wanted to do was make a payment.

Mine and @jacoKotze's final exams for the year (maybe for a while too) are finally starting today. Up first: programming! The most ~complicated~ subject according to our classmates. (Did you notice the sarcasm?)

C# events and delegates, file streams, and LINQ are the "new" content next to the tests where we did exception handling and inheritance.

I can't sign in to my wifi router on my phone because of a stupid JS bug. When you tap on the password box it uses JS to check if the username field is blank. If it is, it auto focuses on that instead. The problem is that it doesn't it think the username field has any content even when it does. So I can't enter my password! I tried blocking JS, then it doesn't render anything. It has no accessibility at all. Thanks a lot TP-Link.

Just got off work, pulled up to the stoplight right outside the office, and some kid texting on his phone rear ended me. That was about an hour ago. So that's how my week ended. How's yours going?

I have to mock an API for my tests. The mocks got so complicated, I basically have cloned the API at this point. Now I'm testing my mocks to make sure they work. I'm essentially writing tests for my tests. There's gotta be a better way to do this.

There are 49 security updates for Windows on my system this morning. Almost all for Office. Forty nine! That's just nuts. I just updated it yesterday. I hope I don't have to reboot 49 times.