Everyone that says you can't get viruses in Linux because only .exe compiled programs can contain malicious code or some bullshit like this is a fucking retarded

Sorry I had to say it

Good one😂

Tomorrow is the day I have been waiting for my entire career...
Tomorrow Microsoft stops supporting Internet Explorer! 🥳

It's sad when I see a seemingly cool job and it says something like: "required 69 years of professional Java experience". Why lock the opportunity to a certain technology?
I haven't used Java professionally but I have used it throughout university and I can get by. And I'm always willing to learn. Weird stuff!

if you’re on holiday, please stay on holiday.

Gamma is the next FAANG

And then one day you wake up and discover that your first boss,

the one who hired you when you had no experience

who believed in you when nobody else did

and also paid you a full decent payment when the rest of the world tried to pay you less than half the amount

who taught you a lot about the business and even when you disagreed, it was impossible to get angry because he was calm and gentle always

and treated you so many lunches and dinners

…was beaten and killed by a former colleague…

I have no words…

Sayonara 👋 boss
I will miss you so much on this Earth 😢

So I had got a company called me a week ago and scheduled an interview via Google Meet which was supposed to happen yesterday in the afternoon. I checked multiple times and was convinced that they didn't send me any invitation or any sort of URL to me as they told me they will send me on the day I will be interviewed.

Yesterday I didn't get any URL, I request the URL and asked them whether the interview is cancelled. They saw the messages I sent them but never reply. Until this noon, I receive a long message that they suggesting to put the blame on me for 'being Gen-z bad attitude worker who didn't show up in the interview and not responsible '. I was confused. Why would they make such a statement as yesterday hours before the interview I was sending them messages and emailing them continuously asking for the URL to the interview session in Google meet. I can't join the interview without the URL obviously.

In my defence, I did follow up with them just to get the link to the interview and get ghosted or silent treatments. As strange as this sound, magically their colour was revealed to me after they put the blame on me for their negligence.

Lastly, it is not a heavy chore to admit mistakes. Lucky enough for me that they revealed every plausible red flag to me before joining their team. I definitely do not want to work for a company that put the blame on me whenever they commit a mistake.

GitHub was trending on Twitter and the first thing I thought was fuck another outage.

The company anti virus is taking up 80% of my CPU on the company laptop

Pain

salary

Me always...

Best co-worker quitting story?

"T" I've refereed to in previous rants knew he was close to being fired, so he jumped ship. 'T' sent the usual "I'll miss you guys" email to the department, except me (and a few others that didn't fall for his BS and not scared of him). His mistake was he sent the email out a day early (buddy forwarded me the email) and left the stuff (box of pics, books, etc) he planned on taking with him. One item in particular was a new company provided laptop bag, which technically wasn't his to keep (supposed to leave/turn-in any company provided equipment), so I grabbed the bag and hid it.

The next day I heard him slamming drawers (looking for the bag) and a loud cursing. Other devs peeking over the walls asking what's wrong.

Dev1: "Dude, what's up? Whatcha' looking for?"
T: "Nothing...fuck!...damn it...nothing...assholes...fucking assholes!"
Dev2: "Who's the ass? What's wrong?"
Dev3: "Need help looking for something?"
T: "No..no...nothing...I'm fine...making sure I don't forget anything."

'T' never found out who took the bag and I've had that laptop bag underneath my desk ever since.

What is a waste of time when you are trying to develop your career as a software engineer?

Expat issues of the month is that the HR is taking its sweet time, while I'm trying to find a house and probably need to provide employment certificate or some shit.
So basically, I'll arrive in a month and either be homeless, crash on a friend's at least an hour and half away by PT, or pay for hotel or airbnb.

... Heaven and hell, could you please work together on solving this, particularly the house issue? Because neither am I made of money nor my nerves can currently take this, specially with this upcoming surgery thing. 🙏

Why do my colleagues insist on HOURLY messages like "any update on X?" or "did you fix Y yet?"

REST ASSURED, WHEN IT IS DONE AND READY TO BE DEMOED, I WILL MESSAGE YOU, AS I HAVE FOR ALL PAST FEATURES AND BUG FIXES.

sheesh talk about too much time on your hands...

oh boy... here we go again...

When you ask for documentation and they hand you a Word document with screenshots of the changed code

Dealing with non-techy people is annoying.
Dealing with non-techy people who THINK they are techy is even worse.

Somewhat true...

N
　 O
　　　 O
　　　　 o
　　　　　o
　　　　　 o
　　　　　o
　　　　 。
　　　 。
　　　.
　　　.
　　　 .
　　　　.

My default algorithm

My hatred is growing as strong and vibrant as a rising star.

Carving wood is more interesting than engaging in meaningless conversations with selfish women and drinking wine.

Client: *uses Oracle on AWS RDS*

Ora: *licence about to expire*

Client: we need a cheaper and equally performant solution.

AWS: we have an outstanding Aurora db! Its performance is flawless!

Client: shut_up_and_take_my_money.png

Engineers: *migrating to Aurora mysql*
Engineers: fine-tuning the db for 2 months, adapting app code.
Aurora: *shits its pants during test ramp-up, delivers ~70% of Ora perf*

==========

Client: we need to do better!

AWS: try Aurora Postgresql!

Engineers: *migrating to Aurora postgresql*
Engineers: fine-tuning the db for 1 month.
Aurora: *shits its pants during test ramp-up, delivers ~40% of Ora perf*

AWS: let me see...
AWS DBAs: *fine-tuning the db for another 2 months*
Aurora: *survives ramp-up, delivers ~70% Ora perf*

AWS DBAs: your application is wrong.
We: Ora didn't complain about that...

AWS DBAs: umm.. Err.. Then your load test is wrong
We: ora wasn't complaining about that either...

AWS DBAs: errr.. Ummm.. Oh, I've got it! Your queries aren't optimized!
We: we cannot change queried - they are hardcoded by our framework's vendor

AWS DBAs: well there you go! Your queries aren't optimized! It's your fault, not aurora's

yyeeahhhh... Riight...

From my xp, aws support and aws engineers ALWAYS try to put the blame on a client. Always. Even when they're obviously wrong.

Every day i wonder if i should just quit the dev life and write childrens books. I am imagining the skillsets should transfer pretty well.

Then i remember i have bills to pay

................

Lead dev walks in:

"Remember what I said about doing dumb shit solutions in languages that no one understands?"

Me: "Yes.....why?"

Him: "That reporting script you did for <x department> needs some modifications and you decided for whatever fucking obscure reason to do it in perl"

Me: "I felt......experimental"

Him: "Well yes, that is cool and all but it needs some modifications as per <X director> and only your dumbass knows perl because you are just too fucking cute aren't ya?"

Me: "You think I am cute??? <insert spongebob blushing meme>"

Him: "I fucking hate it when you write shit in perl"

In my defense, it was a really short fucking script

For clarification: This was a friendly convo even though it doesn't sound like it. He is actually my employee, and a rather close friend, so there is that level of trust and comraderie

Someday I will rely on passive income and not on my job. Gotta escape the rat race 😁

LinkedIn 🤮