My girlfriend is amazing:

After a long uphill battle trying to finish a huge open source project I started months ago. She noticed I was getting a little deflated.
So she donated a small amount to the donation page to lift my spirits.
She wanted to do it secretly but didn't know that it wasnt anonymous.

The little things spur us on.

How cute *_*

When your coffee supplier won't let you order < 5. Client side validation wins again.

Manager: Write a function to get tomorrow's date.

Kids:

int getTomorrowsDate() {
return getCurrentDate() + 1;
}

Legends:

int getTomorrowsDate() {
sleep(1000*60*60*24);
return getCurrentDate();
}

No need of comments!

Remember my password. Forgot my username. FML

If you're reading this you're doing it wrong.

Me and ma kid

Two unit tests, no integration tests.

Teacher: Your program has to be at least 2000 lines long.

-_-

Fooling people at the supermarket

I recently met a young fella (14yo) playing League of Legends. He asked:
- What do you do for a living?
- I'm a programmer, do you know anything about programming?
- I don't, actually.

Apparently he was playing from a LAN Gaming center 'cause he didn't have a computer at home (his computer had broken and these Lan centers are pretty affordable).
I figured I could explain to him what was it and what super powers you could get from it. Turns out I recommended a JS course in codecademy and now he goes to the LAN center every day to study programming (he got really into it!).
Now he always pings me with questions about JS and apparently he's learning a ton! He had almost no English skills too (we're Brazilian), and because most of the material in the internet is in English he found himself some free English courses and he's now taking them!

Knowledge is free on the internet and I guess he's just realized that.

Not exactly a rant guys, just figured it was a nice story to tell :)
#TeachAKidHowToCode

"Join GitHub"
"I'm not gonna join some sketchy, off brand porn site" - friend

It's here 😀 Now I can resume testing my projects peacefully on real device instead of that crashing Android emulator. I still miss my Nexus 6P.

Request URL: /api/v1/user/53b49b5a30
Request Method: GET

Expected Response:
Status Code: 404 Not Found (as the user is actually not present in the DB)

Actual Response:
Status Code: 200 Ok
Response Content:
{
"status": "ERROR",
"errorCode": "404",
"errorMsg": "User Not Found. Please provide a valid user ID",
"type": "Error",
"userMsg": "User Not Found. Please provide a valid user ID"
}

#extremefacepalm

(- _ -)

Put headphones on when I got to work at 7:30am.. it's 3:10pm and I just realised I never started playing music 😑

• Manager : WTF did you push, now it keeps crashing all the servers.

• Me : (silent, I'm trying to speak but nothing is coming out. Felt like someone in coma).

• Someone else shouts at boss : Now we now have 47 major crisis bridges​.

[I went running for the door to get away from everything.]

Only to find myself rolling on the floor tangled in my bedsheets after falling from my bed. Realized it was all but a nightmare.

Went to get some water. While taking the first sip...
Me: Shit, I'm late for work AGAIN.

Running for the door again. Then stopped to think if this is all some fuckin premonition. Hurriedly went for my phone to find out it's nothing but Sunday.

I'm thinking about a career switch now. No more devops once this is over.

How to make sure your users appreciate your work

Yep...

Boss walks by my desk. Stops by the printer when coming back and brings me this.

/*
* First anniversary of devRant unofficial for Windows 10 (UWP)!
*
* Let's celebrate by giving me 500 ++'s 😁
*/

Exactly 1 year ago, on 18 May 2016, I released the first public version (v0.9.2.0 BETA) of my client for Windows 10 users.
I found this wonderful community a few days before, on 12 May 2016, thanks to an article on TNW.
The only flaw was the missing Windows 10 Mobile client for my Lumia 950, so I decided to create a simple one on my own that initially allowed you only to see the list of rants, without the ability interact with them.
A few days later, after spamming the app on twitter, I was reached by @dfox, a very kind person, who gave me all necessary tools and help to bring all official features to Windows 10 users.

A project that I created initially just for fun and necessity became the main project I'm working at in a very short time.

I received a lot of positive reviews from users that motivated me to improve and continue it.
It's true, Windows 10/Windows 10 Mobile users are few, but they appreciate your work as no other and with a lot of feedbacks and suggestions help you to improve it making it very satisfying.

I would like to thank @dfox who made this possible, my friend @thmnmlst who helped me a lot with precious advices and created the presentation below, and of course the whole Windows 10 community! 😉

Good Ranting!

P.S.
If you haven't tried it yet: https://microsoft.com/store/apps/...
For all updates follow me on twitter: https://twitter.com/JakubSOfficial

The v2 is coming... sorry for the delay, below a little preview (alpha) to be forgiven. 😋

Changed my repo name to titanic.

Now it's syncing...
Syncing...
Syncing...
Syncing....

An Android Developer working with Core i3 processor would think twice before building 🤣

I should stop trying to be a developer and become a comedian, or perhaps a meme maker or something...
My rants are better than codes.
I mean, I got 100+ +1s on a rant and my code never runs!
https://devrant.io/rants/654457/...

Linux doesn't need viruses people fuck that shit up themselves

I see where Google is going with women techmakers program

Feeling of world's best engineer...

When deadlines come due but you still try to party with your friends...

My new wallpaper 😂🙌