Automating everything is so satisfying.

The Linux kernel team working on the Intel bug considered naming their fix:

Forcefully Unmap Complete Kernel With Interrupt Trampolines, aka FUCKWIT.

😂😂😂

NOW I get it. (Source: nixCraft)

😈 cruel dad...😈

Found this on the internet

In Switzerland/Germany we have an abbreviation TEAM: "Toll Ein Anderer Macht's" which means "Hurray another one/stupid is doing all the work". I think that nails it.

Was originally hired for 3 months.

Just finished the project 2 weeks ago, after 1.5 years.

I fucking hate data science now.

He wanted a project.
I gave him a project.
He wanted to collaborate.
We did collaborate.
He wrote nothing.
He left the project.
I have to finish the project...

Stuck in an elevator..?

Hey everyone - tonight we performed a database upgrade and unfortunately there were a few "surprise" breaking changes to the query language we use that weren't caught during testing. Once they were discovered after the upgrade. The queries were corrected within a few minutes. You might have noticed some issues with commenting, voting, etc.

On this note, please let me know if you notice anything suspicious like errors when trying to perform normal actions, or anything at all. I appreciate any reports since it's a bit tricky for us to cover every last part of the app alone, though I think we went through most of it. Thanks and please let me know if you have any questions!

Assembly! I bow down to the devs who came before me🙏

Wife discovered MS Paint on her laptop.

She asked me how long the ink would last and how to recharge it when it's finished.

I love her anyway.

Trying out vim for the first time.

It changed my life, really. 😁

Python thug life

😂😂😂

import java.util.Exception;
try {
public class A {
public static void main(String args[]) {
new Exception();
}
}
}
catch(Exception e) {
System.out.println("Got you BITCH");
}

It saved me from suicide.

You have to understand first that things in India work differently. Academics are not personal, but a social business. Academic competition in India is very high and not in a good way, or for the good reasons.

As a teenager was sent off from my home to the other side of the country. I didn't like it. My studies suffered, and I failed my exams. Came back home and faced months of emotional abuse (guilt trips, scornful comments, plain insults) from my parents, neighbours and relatives. Indian society is just built that way. They didn't know they were damaging my psyche, or they were too angry to care. Lots of other shit (lost friends, lost love) happened at roughly the same time period and everything started to fall like dominos.

I fell into severe depression. Lost appetite, lost sleep. Nothing mattered anymore. There were mornings when I would wake up and not get up from my bed for hours, and not even move a finger. Self-hate became the motto of the day. I became violent and anti-social. I would either be angry or trying not to break down and give up all the time. Many a night, I considered suicide. I would end up googling for easy ways out to take.

But what gave me a way out of the pains of my reality was programming. It helped my keep my head, figuratively and literally. It kept my mind distracted and gave me a sense of purpose. I would shut myself in, plug in my headphones, shut the world out and just experiment.

I am not saying that I am the best at what I do, but those sleepless and troubled nights, and many other similar nights over the years have given me a definite edge over my colleagues.

Even today, when everything is falling to pieces, I know I have something to fall back on. I still get episodes of depression every now and then, but I know I can always pick up a new project and distract myself. It probably isn't healthy, but eh...

I am alive. I code. I kick ass. My colleagues respect and value my opinion. I love my job.

Computer does what I tell it to do (mostly :p) and I feel good. Because for that small moment, I am in control of everything. For that infinitesimally small moment of my average, boring, and somewhat painful life, I am God.

[sees majority of rants about JQuery]

Me: "I use express"

Me: yo pass me the photoshop
Friend: You better not make weeb idol game design
Me:

Remember the WebDev guy from my last inspirational "rant"?

Well he called me and he somehow found a Support scammer

so I went over to his place and setup our "how to destroy a scammer's computer" kit which we got from a couple of friends in Discord and waited for the scammer to call.

And at long last, the scammer called,He setup a VM while I find his IP and RAT his computer, then went on to find other computers and check if they reside on the same LAN network.

at that point WebDev guy asked me "what are you planning to do?"

"Tell him this is your banking app" while presenting him a virus executable. "Don't click on that though". So he did, and they began the transfer and once the scammer clicked it on his computer (I was observing via RDP), we lost connection to the scammer's computer so I assumed the thing worked.

We were laughing our asses while in the middle of this fuckery.

Best moment in my life.

Patch ASAP....

Today's my birthday.

I want to remind everyone that we're all just kids pretending to be adults.

No one actually has it figured it out.

😊

Boss: I can't open the website.

Me: What connection you using boss? Try to switch to LAN cable. Our office wifi a little bit wonky today.
*plug in LAN cable

Boss: Ahaaaaa! It works now. Please, next time make you develop website wifi compatible.

Me: ****

What does dfox say ?

DEV, DEV, DEV, DEV ,DEV, DEV
RANT, RANT, RANT, RANT, RANT

As a Python user and the fucking unicode mess, this is sooooo mean!

The opposite sex avoids me like assembly language

So good

512 looks like a more rounded number than 500.

I started counting at 0