And then one day you wake up and discover that your first boss,

the one who hired you when you had no experience

who believed in you when nobody else did

and also paid you a full decent payment when the rest of the world tried to pay you less than half the amount

who taught you a lot about the business and even when you disagreed, it was impossible to get angry because he was calm and gentle always

and treated you so many lunches and dinners

…was beaten and killed by a former colleague…

I have no words…

Sayonara 👋 boss
I will miss you so much on this Earth 😢

first day back at work after six months of educational leave. I love and mossed my team but damn, I could already use another six months of sleeping out.

It’s official. I’m dating a girl.

She’s damn smart, tasteful, hot and really into tech.

Honest, talkative, a real keeper.

Studying IT-Security. Fuckkk I’m dropping spit out my mouth. ALL. DAY.

I can lead other people to treasure i cant get😅

Code review titles by year:

1990 - your code is using to much memory
1995 - your code is not running on window 95
2000 - your code is slow
2003 - your code don't have tests
2005 - your code is not 64 bit
2009 - your code is not using mvc patters
2010 - your code is not horizontal scalable
2011 - your code should be written in js
2015 - your code is not mobile ready
2020 - your code is racist

Had to wirte and optimize a C++ program that finds for 1000x1000x1000 grid points the 100 nearest points for each (with an additional factor to make it more complicated).
It had to run in under 18 minutes to pass. No matter what I did I couldn't get it fast enough. I tried kd-trees, caching of certain points, optimizing distamce calculations by ommiting any irrelevant factor, saving points' calculated squares etc etc. When Ibwas down to 20 minutes, I realized, that my makefile had an error and ignored the - O3 flag...
Well, it actually ran 5 minutes with -O3.

Genius troll 😂😂

In peace for a while

big 2+ years project finally canceled due to failure. About to have a meeting about "the future of the team".
Pray for me.

When, after trying and debuggin everything else, I realized in the shower, that I forgot to annotate my method.

No,Thanks I can wait one more day.

When you don't have anything good to post so you make this

Hehe...

damn this is brilliant

Designers,

■■■■■■■ please
■■■■ stop
■■■■■■■■■ using
■■ charts
■■■■■ to show
■■■■■■■ your skills
■■■■ in your
■■■■■■■ resume

Kill him!!

😂😂😂😂😂

main.cpp 😨

YES YES YES

Types of personalities

Will Always Remember

Hahaha

Happens when you are new.

Personal Project:
Code lives in gitrepo, commits to master are automatically unit tested and if all tests work it will be published to production
At Work:
"If you're done put this .bat in the project folder, it will copy everything in it per ftp to production"

i -= --i

😂😂😂😂

It's okay LinkedIn you tried.

"We care about your privacy [...]"

That's why we make it ultra inconvenient to turn off all of our advertising trackers and give you a broken list of on/off sliders that are slow as fuck. Also, why not just press the 'accept all' at the top of the page? See that big green button? Yeah green is good let's just press it and get this over with right?

Oh and that 'deny all' button? Yeah, a shame nobody actually put some programming into that thing, why not just press the green button next to it? You're only making it harder for yourself y'know...

Senior Devs, what are your general expectations from a junior Dev at work?

And the award for the best API documentation goes to...

Microsoft!