Details
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						AboutFull stack Web Developer
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						SkillsHTML, CSS, JS NodeJS, Python, Django C, C++
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						LocationDelhi, India
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						Github
Joined devRant on 10/17/2017
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				    🤔 If developers were linguists...
 
 Person 1: How do you say "????" in Italian?
 
 Person 2: Why don't you use Japanese? It's a much better language.6
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				    In networking class today:
 
 Student - "But this is just in theory, how does it work in practice?"
 
 Lecturer - "In theory, theory and practice are the same thing."15
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				    Designers,
 
 ■■■■■■■ please
 ■■■■ stop
 ■■■■■■■■■ using
 ■■ charts
 ■■■■■ to show
 ■■■■■■■ your skills
 ■■■■ in your
 ■■■■■■■ resume17
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				    *squirming in bed*
 If it ain't broke don't fix it.. If it ain't broke don-WHAT THE FUCK IS "payment.needed2"??
 Calm down, it's just some bad code but it works, you didn't write it, it's not your probl-WHY THE FUCK DO THE IF STATEMENTS HAVE SO MANY DUPLICATED LINES??
 
 Sleep. Just sleep.
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				    The first time I realized I wasn't as good as I thought I was when I met the smartest dev I've ever known (to this day).
 
 I was hired to manage his team but was just immediately floored by the sheer knowledge and skills this guy displayed.
 
 I started to wonder why they hired outside of the team instead of promoting him when I found that he just didn't mesh well with others.
 
 He was very blunt about everything he says. Especially when it comes to code reviews. Man, he did /not/ mince words. And, of course, everyone took this as him just being an asshole.
 
 But being an expert asshole myself, I could tell he wasn't really trying to be one and he was just quirky. He was really good and I really liked hanging out with him. I learned A LOT of things.
 
 Can you imagine coming into a lead position, with years of experience in the role backing your confidence and then be told that your code is bad and then, systematically, very precisely, and very clearly be told why? That shit is humbling.
 
 But it was the good kind of humbling, you know? I really liked that I had someone who could actually teach me new things.
 
 So we hung out a lot and later on I got to meet his daughter and wife who told me that he had slight autism which is why he talked the way he did. He simply doesn't know how to talk any other way.
 
 I explained it to the rest of the team (after getting permission) and once they understood that they started to take his criticism more seriously. He also started to learn to be less harsh with his words.
 
 We developed some really nice friendships and our team was becoming a little family.
 
 Year and a half later I had to leave the company for personal reasons. But before I did I convinced our boss to get him to replace me. The team was behind him now and he easily handled it like a pro.
 
 That was 5 years ago. I moved out of the city, moved back, and got a job at another company.
 
 Four months ago, he called me up and said he had three reasons for us to meet up.
 
 1. He was making me god father of his new baby boy
 2. That they created a new position for him at the company; VP of Engineering
 and
 3. He wanted to hang out
 
 So we did and turns out he had a 4th reason; He had a nice job offer for me.
 
 I'm telling this story now because I wanted to remind everyone of the lesson that every mainstream anime tells us:
 
 Never underestimate the power of friendship.21
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				    Interviewer: Can you explain OOP to a six year old?
 
 Applicant: About the 6yo, are you referring to a client or you?
 
 🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️13
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				    If your IDE found
 
 10 errors
 
 and 47 warns
 
 would you correct them
 
 or let them slip.
 
 YO ...
 
 His palms are sweaty
 
 Knees weak, arms are heavy
 
 The tests are failing already
 
 Code spaghetti.
 
 He's nervous,
 
 But at his laptop he looks calm and ready
 To squash bugs
 
 But he keeps on forgetting
 
 What he wrote down, the whole team goes so loud
 
 He opens his file, but the code won't come out
 
 He's chokin', how, everybody's jokin' now
 
 The deadline run out, times up, over, blaow!
 
 Snap back to reality, oh there goes file integrity
 
 Oh, there goes documentation, he choked
 
 He's so mad, but he won't give up that easy? No
 
 He won't have it, he knows his whole header's code
 
 It don't matter, he's dope, he knows that, but he's broke
 
 He's so stacked that he knows, when he goes back to his mobile home, that's when its
 
 Back to the office again yo, this whole rhapsody
 
 He better go capture this moment and hope it don't pass him
 
 Note: All credits to the original owners of these phrases.5
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				    A few of Stux's !dev pet peeves
 
 1) People that walk slow as fuck in the middle of a side walk. Like hurry uppppp. I've gotta get 0.5 miles in like 8 minutes and you blocking the walkway doesn't help.
 
 2) People that don't understand how side walks work. Treat it like the fucking road. ⬇️⬆️ Is the pattern in which you should walk. It's not rocket science.
 
 3) People that start walking up the bus steps as I'm clearly walking forward to get off. Ffs let me off and THEN get on you stupid bitch
 
 4) people that bike or ride their skateboard/longboard around campus but are moving slower than I am while walking. If you're gonna do that hop the fuck off and carry the damn thing.
 
 5) people that don't try to solve an issue with their code on their own BEFORE they call the professor over. (There goes the !dev lol)
 
 6) people that act like their favorite musician or athelete or actor or anyone fucking famous they play kiss ass with can't be criticized. Just bc they're famous and/or good at what they do sure asf doesn't make them perfection and I retain the right to voice my opinion.
 
 My name is Stuxnet and you're watching Disney Channel.11
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				    CEO hired graphics designer without HR help after first meeting and that person first day of his work borrowed money from people and that’s not end of story.
 
 Same guy came back at night and robbed the workplace with his friends, didn’t came back to work. Company bought couple of big iMac for new graphics department back then, all gone.
 
 When company reported incident to Police it turned out he travel and steal from companies all over the country and they’re trying to catch him for a year.11
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				    me: I don't have access to X project
 
 PM: you don't have access to X project?
 
 me: no, I don't have access to X project
 
 PM: don't worry I'll take care of that
 
 2 min. later
 
 PM: so, you were saying ... ?
 
 me: that I don't have access to X project
 
 1 month later
 
 me: I don't have access to X project
 
 PM: you don't have access to X project?10
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				    Stop talking trash about developer tools!
 
 Vim is FAST
 
 Visual Studio is RESPONSIVE
 
 Eclipse is EFFICIENT
 
 IntelliJ IDEA is PERFORMANT
 
 Android Studio
 
 Xcode is POWERFUL25

 
		
		
	
















