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I can't name one specific time that was the best memory per say. My team is super close - we get lunch almost every day, have (inappropriate) inside jokes and just act dumb together. Not one person on my team who doesn't fit in. Even our boss is cool. :) #LoveMyTeam4
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"LeT's uSe gRaPhQL!" They said.
"It EliMinAtEs cOmpLeX aNd vErBoSe REST coDe!" they said.
Me sitting here for hours waiting for the backend team to fix major regressions every time they push the smallest "updates" to staging... 🤡
Call me a boomer but I can't help but feeling graphQL makes things MORE complex than REST... either that or the backend devs have no idea what they are doing17 -
As a fellow devRant user, what is it you primarily look for in this app ?
0. Some place to rant
1. Dev jokes/memes
2. Observer. devNews.
3. devProjects
4. Here because you don't like being in the presence of people but want to socialise anyway.
5. Finding your partner in life.32 -
A programmer was smoking.
A lady standing near by asked him can't you see the warning? smoking is injurious for health!!
He replied, "We are bothered only about errors NOT warnings"....2 -
Had a conference call and one of the guys said something along the lines of "I can handle the load (ticket load)" didn't even thought about it my mouth instinctively reacted with "that's what she said".
A couple of guys laughed but the other few just "wooooow"ed like if I had thrown a 9/11 joke.
This is not a rant perse, just a reminder that if I ever launch my own startup I shall look to hire "joke sensitive" people to make my scrum meetings as awkward as possible.4 -
Once C++ walks into a bar and sees C.
C is drunk, falling on the floor, spitting, and swearing.
How classless! -says C++4 -
A colleague at work always says L.O.L. to jokes instead of actually laughing. So fucking annoying I feel like punching him in the face! 😤11
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[Half question / half rant]
Would you rather work with a laid-back, humorous colleague who produces shit code and won’t understand advice for improvement?
Or would you rather work with someone who’s more serious, even slightly boring, but who takes quality seriously and is open to advice?
Yes I’ve worked with both types. Hands down I prefer working with the latter. With the first dude I’ll have good conversations and a good laugh at his puns and jokes. But at the end of the day I’m pulling my hair trying to make sense of his code and spending a shitload of time reviewing his PRs just to make sure he’s not fucking things up even more.4 -
I think I may have shared this a while back. Just played with this a little for fun. I was playing with an ESP8266. Apparently it takes very little code to turn it into an access point and have it redirect to a landing page just like a hotel wifi does. Every platform I had connect to the AP seemed to work properly. I setup the AP without a password and let people log in. I named the AP "Virus Distribution Point". Here is what they would see:
https://htmlpreview.github.io//...
Don't mind the name of the repo. It is a junk repo I made for making mom jokes.7 -
My manager’s manager (my superboss)..
Every time we go for a design discussion, this guy goes into his own world of inspiration, motivation, religion and damn things.. the more you think of pulling him back, the more lame jokes he starts to crack, the more you’ll bring in work related talks, the more stupid his output will be.. it is now resulting in a late delivery date, a frustrated manager, and a frustrated team. Moreover he says, he’s inspired from Elon Musk, dafuq, I mean seriously? What part of his approach on productivity you actually got inspired by? Sleep?4 -
Bossman told me to give my project more hierarchy and to add all those weird __init__.py files.
I don,t quite like all those boring empty files, so anyone got some bri'ish language "innit?" jokes or other awful puns to add as comments?8 -
Java and C were telling jokes. It was C's turn, so he writes something on the wall, points to it and says "Do you get the reference?" But Java didn't.7
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past time: Making jokes on programmer humor forums about the jokes being told on the humor forum.
fall out: Autists who don't get the joke of the joke and genuinely think they need to explain the original joke even though it is "obvious" it was a play on words.
struggle: Resisting explaining to them the joke on the joke. And if I break down and explain, trying not to be a condescending prick. Most of the time I don't respond.
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If you're subscribed to me only because of my jokes, feel free to ignore this rant. You won't miss anything.
If not, bear with me.
I was wrong about almost everything I can remember. Preaching so-called “conceptual thinking”, I invented a fantasy world of random anecdotes, which turned into a completely false worldview that shaped my reality. I bashed magical thinking, yet succumbed to it. What I believed to be true was just as magical, wrapped into what sounded like science. In the Dunning-Krueger scheme, I was right there on Peak Stupid.
Random hear-say, stupid concepts I invented, random “knowledge” I picked from YouTube videos, all that was rotting inside my head, one anecdote contradicting another. Ultimately, I think this was the reason of my constant anxiety and pointless, never-ending thought process in background.
If you learned anything factual from me and didn't fact-check it, please forget that immediately. The list includes but is not limited to everything on brain structure, everything on philosophy, almost everything on engineering and architecture, almost everything on systems theory and programming meta stuff (declarative, imperative, etc.)
I admit bashing unit tests. The only reason was me disliking writing them in uni. I wrote like three test cases, disliked it, and the rest was history. Everything else was a rationalization on top. If I was right about something, I was just lucky.
I'm not a CSS prodigy. I know stuff that earns me money and impresses my colleagues, but my knowledge is just one step above basics, in one thousand steps ladder.8 -
The amount of highly sexual, disgusting jokes and shit that me and my employees say at the office behind close doors is the primary reason why I keep the door to my department offices closed.
I usually tell everyone that it is due to covid concerns, but it ain't, we really do be making the most disgusting jokes known to man.
Example:
Me: cum bucket!!!!
From outside the office, the CMS admin: "mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm yess daddy??"
My office is not normal, my guys are polite, articulate and proper in any other meeting that we attend, but dear me I sometimes worry.11 -
In August 2021 I asked my bosses for a raise for my extra work that I done for the last 6 months to create the first 4 microservices in the company and deploy them in production on a new infrastructure that is cloud based.
Today 27/01/2022 they reported how happy they are of me and that they will take my proposal *in consideration*.
Now i am searching for a new job.
Funny part: I am simple guy if they would have given me a NAS from Synology with lot of space as a reward I would actually have been happy.
P.S. jokes on them, i left 4 easter eggs hidden in the app, pipeline, db and user manual.3 -
We need a code shortcode here for more dev jokes.
[code]
if (int devrantpoints <= 10 && bathroombreak) {
cout << newrant ();
}
[/code] -
I don't know how much of this can be considered data loss but one one of my uni classmates frustrated by some hellish tasks (cleaning some old code files probably) decided that everything in that particular directory won't be of any further need, so she procede to rm -rf it.. only to discover that the terminal opened in that dir was another one and her current one (the one she bashed that unforgiving rm) was in fact a standard freshly opened term where any term would open.. in the user's (only user) home dir... such a face she had when all her codes, homeworks, projects and everything went to oblivion 😂😂 jokes aside it was a good thing that the semester was almost finished, all hws submited and no important data was there as she dual booted with ubuntu and some windows, but funny thing how such a honest mistake can ruin not only your day, but maybe your entire semester1
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Question - How are computers and air conditioners similar?
They are both useless when you open windows. -
I HATE, HATE, HATE, HATE TEEN TITANS GO, IT RUINED TEEN TITANS FOR ME AND I HATE THOSE LITTLE STUPID DUMB VERSIONS OF THE ORIGINAL BETTER TEEN TITANS.
IT SHOULD'VE NEVER HAPPENED AND NEVER EXISTED AND I FUCKING HATE IT AND IT SUCKS!
WE SHOULD CANCEL TEEN TITANS GO AND RUIN THE PEOPLE WHO MADE IT AND DIRECTED ITS LIVES. I AM FILLED WITH HATRED AND RAGE, AND WHEN THEY MAKE THOSE STUPID UNFUNNY "JOKES" IT PISSES ME OFF AND MAKES ME WANT TO COMMIT MURDER! I AM SO PISSED OFF AFTER WATCHING AN EPISODE OF IT, THE CREATORS SHOULD BE SUED.
THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME AND ENJOY WHAT I HAVE TO SAY.4 -
Hey guys I need an interview tip here.
I applied to this payment processing company as an android dev. I completed almost all of the stages, they gave very positive feedback and tomorrow is the last stage (30min talk with their CTO from USA, who's been in his company for 18 years).
They told me that he wont ask many questions and he will just try to scan me and figure out the vibe. Mind that the main company is in USA and company where I'm applying is in Europe. So I guess this is a final test to see how good I'm in english in terms of speaking? Jokes on them I worked in 3 startups in Europe and I can speak better than most of my peers who never left my country lol.
What kind of questions should I ask HIM? I am able to leave a good impression, but I would also appreciate any tips on how to deal with this better. Apparently I will need to communicate with this guy from time to time in the future, as he is the head of our project.9 -
Was talking about jokes in general at work today. Asked someone if they knew about jokes where you read something out loud. Ended up having them read this aloud:
We Todd did
Eye yam we Todd did
Eye yam sofa king we Todd did
Some people don't get it even when read aloud. Afterwards I thought: eye yam sew hymn mat tour
Edit: Oh, we could get people to read this to their dev duck. lol2 -
There are 10 types of people in this world: those who understand binary, and those who don't.
copied from https://entechts.com/blog/2019/...3
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