Me: I develop Applications.

Stranger: Oh so you are a programmer.

Me: Yup 😎

Stranger: Please hack my ex's insta.

Me: I am not a hacker nor am I intrested in learning to hack. I develop stuff from scratch. Innovate and contribute something to society.

Stranger: Oh, what a disappointment. Why did you say you are a programmer then.

Me: I...~am 😶

For some, hacking is the only programming thing for them. I get message at least once a month from someone requesting to hack someones fb,insta or some account.

Thinking of creating a bot which finds such keywords in my messages and automatically replies to them explaining what I really do. Or just f***ing block them.

Today we interviewed a _very_ good Angular1 Dev, by chance we showed him the forked ngRouter module we use, after some debate he explained that we were using it incorrectly.. I asked if he'd used it before to which he responded:

"Yeah, I'm the guy who built it"

😅

When frontend is ready before backend

As a programmer, I'm outraged.

My 9 year old son checks out the source code of every website he visits. If he finds something he doesn't understand, he bounces it off me. I love the snot outta that kid ❤️❤️❤️.

When you take User Experience to the next level. Just what I was thinking

Credits : Riot App

"WiFi is better than Ethernet because the air is bigger so it can hold more internet."

Yes, and horse-drawn carriages are better than cars because they have bigger wheels.

Give that man some HUGE FUCKING COOKIES!

"Why are people using Git? It's too complicated. Dropbox can do the same kind of things."

- A fellow CS student at university

HTTP response code cheat sheet
(From /r/Programmer humor)

when your code is a mess but everything work out in the end

When back-end engineers get excited about something.

Manager: Write a function to get tomorrow's date.

Kids:

int getTomorrowsDate() {
return getCurrentDate() + 1;
}

Legends:

int getTomorrowsDate() {
sleep(1000*60*60*24);
return getCurrentDate();
}

Just learned new skills...

1. Customer wants X.
2. Developer delivers X.
3. Customer wants developer to change X to Y for free.
4. Developer demands money.
5. Customer gets mad.
6. Developer compares situation to ordering a hamburger, consuming it, and demanding a pizza for free because customer didn't like the hamburger.
7. Customer pays

How does a front-end developer get away with murder?

$('body').hide();

//I'll see myself out

Google => googled

Duck duck go => duck duck went?

🤔

Let's clarify:
* Github is not Git
* Android is not Java
* Unit test is not TDD
* Java is not OOP
* Docker is not Devops
* Jenkins is not CI
* Agile is not institutionalised total chaos
* Developer is not Printer Support

In Europe, we use € instead of $ in jQuery.