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Joined devRant on 5/28/2017
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eBay's APIs make me want to cry.
Take the sandbox for example:
- Every time you log into a session, it logs you out.
- When you create an order (eventually!) and want to retrieve it, tough shit it doesn't feel like doing that today.
- Functionality both exists and doesn't exist at the same time on both the LIVE and Sandbox APIs. I don't know how they've managed to get quantum computers in their server room, but their GOD DAMN API LIBRARIES ARE NOT THE BEST USE CASE FOR QUANTUM COMPUTING!!
I don't know if I despise eBay or Magento more...undefined shit apis quantum computing i would like to poke my eyes out with a spoon wtf am i doing with my life ebay -
Gave my two weeks, two weeks ago. Today was my last day. The designer finally asked to see how I go about doing my job, and was blown away at how "hard" it is. Smug satisfaction +1.
I leave the office at 5, go home, get packed, and start driving to my new city/state. An hour into the trip, my phone rings. My boss, on vacation out of the country acts surprised that I'm not going to be there Monday. I personally gave her my resignation. Exactly two weeks ago. "Are you going to be at the meeting Monday? We still have some stuff up in the air."
WHAT FUCKING PLANET DID I JUST LEAVE?17 -
CORRECT ME IF I'M WRONG.
Didn't server industry and technology get a little.. stale?
I mean, just look at similar industries
For example - mobile phones, they are everywhere now and each year we get new technology, the new big thing and whatnot.
Other example - gaming, VR came up moderately recently to a usable state, we got a great influx of flexible languages like C#, Java etc.
New engines to build games on top of, new graphical apis like Vulkan and whatnot.
..and Servers? It feels like the last big thing (and makes me feel like the only one) was Cloud Storage.
wdyt?11 -
So I got a couple of C.H.I.P. single-board computers a good while back because Raspberry Pi Zero was always out of stock.
I named them pringles, the smooth and synthetic one with a GUI, and ruffles, the sturdier and rugged one with a headless OS.
...They still lack a definitive purpose in life.4 -
Hardware development needed 3 months more than estimated so PM cuts this time on the software development to keep the schedule.
That's gonna be a big success.9 -
Thanks windows 😉
I can free ~4TB on my ~32GB drive 😂😂 I astonished how much crap of this OS can be on such a small plate 👌😂2 -
Dear team,
Train people well enough so they can leave
Treat them well enough so they don't want to
Regards,
A member of dev team2 -
One of my colleagues at work has cooked up this amazing amazing method.. and guys brace yourself.. This code is on production..17
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25 phrases you wish you could say at work more often
(Warning: Contains naughty words...:-)))
1. Ahhh...I see the fuck-up fairy has visited us again...
2. I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.
3. How about never? Is never good for you?
4. I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
5. I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to worship me.
6. I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.
7. I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message...
8. I don't work here. I'm a consultant.
9. It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.
10. I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.
11. I like you. You remind me of me when I was young and stupid.
12. You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.
13. I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a damn.
14. I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.
15. I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you.
16. Thank you. We're all refreshed and challenged by your unique point of view.
17. The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.
18. Any connection between your reality and mine is purely coincidental.
19. What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?
20. I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.
21. It's a thankless job, but I've got a lot of Karma to burn off.
22. Yes, I am an agent of Satan, but my duties are largely ceremonial.
23. No, my powers can only be used for good.
24. You sound reasonable... Time to up the medication.
25. Who me? I just wander from room to room17 -
HTML: Hate This Meaningless Life
CSS: Can't Style Shit
JS: Just Shit
Java: Just another vicious asshole
PHP: PHP Hates People
Go: (the "fuck yourself" is silent)
.NET: Now Everybody Thinks (they can code)
I really should find a more productive thing to do on my breaks.19 -
So I got the job. Here's a story, never let anyone stop you from accomplishing your dreams!
It all started in 2010. Windows just crashed unrecoverably for the 3rd time in two years. Back then I wasn't good with computers yet so we got our tech guy to look at it and he said: "either pay for a windows license again (we nearly spend 1K on licenses already) or try another operating system which is free: Ubuntu. If you don't like it anyways, we can always switch back to Windows!"
Oh well, fair enough, not much to lose, right! So we went with Ubuntu. Within about 2 hours I could find everything. From the software installer to OpenOffice, browsers, email things and so on. Also I already got the basics of the Linux terminal (bash in this case) like ls, cd, mkdir and a few more.
My parents found it very easy to work with as well so we decided to stick with it.
I already started to experiment with some html/css code because the thought of being able to write my own websites was awesome! Within about a week or so I figured out a simple html site.
Then I started to experiment more and more.
After about a year of trial and error (repeat about 1000+ times) I finally got my first Apache server setup on a VirtualBox running Ubuntu server. Damn, it felt awesome to see my own shit working!
From that moment on I continued to try everything I could with Linux because I found the principle that I basically could do everything I wanted (possible with software solutions) without any limitations (like with Windows/Mac) very fucking awesome. I owned the fucking system.
Then, after some years, I got my first shared hosting plan! It was awesome to see my own (with subdomain) website online, functioning very well!
I started to learn stuff like FTP, SSH and so on.
Went on with trial and error for a while and then the thought occured to me: what if I'd have a little server ONLINE which I could use myself to experiment around?
First rented VPS was there! Couldn't get enough of it and kept experimenting with server thingies, linux in general aaand so on.
Started learning about rsa key based login, firewalls (iptables), brute force prevention (fail2ban), vhosts (apache2 still), SSL (damn this was an interesting one, how the fuck do you do this yourself?!), PHP and many other things.
Then, after a while, the thought came to mind: what if I'd have a dedicated server!?!?!?!
I ordered my first fucking dedicated server. Damn, this was awesome! Already knew some stuff about defending myself from brute force bots and so on so it went pretty well.
Finally made the jump to NginX and CentOS!
Made multiple VPS's for shitloads of purposes and just to learn. Started working with reverse proxies (nginx), proxy servers, SSL for everything (because fuck basic http WITHOUT SSL), vhosts and so on.
Started with simple, one screen linux setup with ubuntu 10.04.
Running a five monitor setup now with many distro's, running about 20 servers with proxies/nginx/apache2/multiple db engines, as much security as I can integrate and this fucking passion just got me my first Linux job!
It's not just an operating system for me, it's a way of life. And with that I don't just mean the operating system, but also the idea behind it :).20 -
!rant
So last weekend I started collecting hardware for a small scale cluster at home to test scalability of my software. Making some decent progress.
Tomorrow I will replace the switch and this weekend I will set up storage so I can start my first application20 -
Just saved a life. I was just walking with the dog (it's 3am here) and there was a bleeding drunk on the street - completely unconscious. Must have fallen on his head. Got the police. The paramedics told me a few minutes ago that the guy had a skull fracture. A few hours later it would probably have been too late for him.5
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Just met my two friend dev and jay after a long time. After some initial random conversation.
Dev: What is your job profile?
Jay (excitedly): I design electronic circuits and write some low-level programs for them.
D: So you are a low-level programmer?
J: Yeah.
D: My cousin is also a programmer. But, I think he is smarter than you.
J (confused and thinking that he must be a good programmer): Oh great! It would be nice to meet him. But, why do you think he is smarter?
D: Although still in school, he is a high-level programmer.
J: -_-"4 -
[when starting out with web dev] Just use bootstrap!
Please don't. I teach web dev now, and when people learn a framework initially, they often get a warped and incomplete understanding of how things work. They spend their time learning the framework instead of learning the systems they're actually working with, and then when the want to do something the framework can't do, they're just at a loss.
Don't get me wrong, bootstrap and jquery and so on have their places, but those places aren't when you're just starting out.12 -
I started studying computer science 3 years ago as a challenge for myself, try something new, do something I knew absoluty nothing about.
I was always the girl who didn't know as much as the rest. I took longer than everyone else, made worse solutions. I always felt like a burden.
Yet today, for the first time, I really felt like a real developer at my last week of my summer job. Explaining a five year older collegue (with a lot more (web)dev experience) about design patterns, git, c++, and helping him to understand and use it properly.
Apparently I was smiling like an idiot because he asked me if I was making fun of him, while deep inside I was just so happy to be helpful.. 😊18 -
Do you ever wonder why the UK public sector has such a bad computer system? This! This is why!!! What a frigging waste of money!!!! Every computer in the school has this stupid set up!!!19
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I really love it when people just downvote your question on stackoverflow without any explanation, it helps a lot to fix my problem thx 👌8
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I’ve been working on a fun little project using Crystal and d-bus to control the lighting for Razer RGB devices. Making progress!24
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doing it finally
any tips?
(i have windows 7 and xUbuntu installed on the designated machine already)12 -
When learning a new language replace "Hello world" with "Hello darkness my old friend". Sounds more appropriate.4