Girl: you don't...see sharp
Me: I'm... Not a Java developer
Girl: I never said you were
Me: but why make that joke?
Girl: what joke? You hit your head on a beam tripped over a chair and missed your drink. You clearly need glasses
Me: *gets glasses* oh your not a girl 😳

My first dev job was a paid internship at Oak Ridge National Laboratory. But I wasn't in the computing division with the supercomputer and the 30-foot 18-screen wall display. In a way, I was doing something more exciting. I was in the Hollifield Radioactive Ion Beam Facility.

That meant that I was working next to a radioactive ray gun that they fired at different targets to try and make new kinds of particles. To refine the beam components, there was a tower with the world's highest voltage Van de Graf generator at 25,000 kilovolts. I got training on how to put on a radiation suit, and was told that if I got locked in the wrong room and red lights began to flash, I had about five seconds to run to the far wall and push the E-stop, before I got irradiated and died slowly over the next five weeks.

But, I was reassured, that never happened. Radiation leaks are rare too (that's why we wore dosimeters). More likely, there would be a leak in the generator tower. To explain why that's bad, that tower wasn't filled with normal air. 25,000 kilovolts would punch through that like nothing, arc against the walls, and we'd lose the electric charge. No, instead, the tower was filled to a few atmospheres of pressure with sulfur hexafluoride gas. You know how helium makes your voice go up? This stuff makes your voice go down. It's heavier than air, and it kills you by displacing and starving your lungs of oxygen.

So, while I was happily coding away on PHP, CSS and the Bash shell, making a log book for all the ion gun settings and targets the scientists used in their experiments, I was keeping an ear out for the oxygen alarm. I had a blast!

beam me up

Just saw this during a speech ... 😅

is this only happening for independent developers?

I spent 4 hours trying to rectify a client's website.

Just to find out it was missing a '}' in one of the CSS line. Can you not?

*facepalm*

So these days (since yesterday), I am using an iPhone. Mom’s phone broke and she wanted an android, and I wanted to fiddle with iPhone... So she took my OnePlus 3 and got me an iPhone 6s.
I like iOS as long as it works.

But... I FREAKING HATE that the App Store has country specific rating. You will only see the ratings/reviews of your countrymen.
Whose frigging brilliant idea was that!!! 😡😡😡
Now I have most apps (like beam and narwhal for reddit) showing as unrated.
M so pissed off at this 😩😩

My shower tap has two modes:
- Quark-melting relativistic beam of sizzling hot plasma
- Time-freezing liquid death from the cold heart of Dante’s hell

Entering Week4 post-layoff. Week2 of pretty much nothing but playing with my kids, doing house chores, exercising and job searching.

I spent like 3 hours in the gym last Friday. Instructor there turned to me and said "tough divorce?". To what I answered "very happily married, got laid off from work". He said that it would be his second guess.

Even before this whole crap I had enough cash flow-yielding investments to just about make rent. My wife makes enough to make sure we will want for nothing, our old folks have our kids' tuition fees covered, and we have some savings anyway.
But the anxiety-laden period between "send a dozen messages and resumė's" and having the same "greetings, fellow millenial!" meetings with different sets of tech-illiterate boomers and toddlers is becoming a boring nuisance, one that "having a side project to keep my mind warm" could solve.

Maybe I will fix the Stardew Valley Mods API for Android. I haven't done the C#/.NET thing since uni, and my frontend Java game is weak (at best) but how much could have it changed this last decade or so? /s

Maybe I will write a MongoDB Runner for Apache Beam. But I'm afraid that won't yeld enough street cred to be worth it Does anyone knows what it means?

Maybe I will finally be done consolidating a lifetime of cloud storage into a big-kid glacier-level LTS solution.

Dunno, bored here. Need some 20h/week project I can quit as soon as some job appears to be lining up. Ideas?

Last Thursday, project owner insisted that the module I was working on to be ready for testing this Monday(though the supposed deadline is next week).
Went to work on a day off to deliver it as requested. Monday came. Monday went. No testing started. Project owner was on leave.
Now he's asking if we can start with the testing.
Hope I have laser beam eyes so I can toast him. -_-

Guy told me Java Swing is more stable and has more effective look than JavaFx. Okay mate, I'm sure. 😒

I don't understand why people drive with high beam on, even when it's not needed!
Is it only in India or anywhere else too?

Literally, I'm so frustrated with this shit.

This point should be the very first and most important in the list of the learning driving.

It wasn't really the project itself, but more the execution of it

Last semester we were tasked with writing a new programming language from scratch. We were a team of six people, everything went great to begin with. We discussed language features, the framework runtime it should run on and even what language to write it in.

Fast forward two weeks, nobody is doing anything but me, the two dudes tasked with helping me were both no-shows and the others were busy documenting the syntax and semantics of the language.

I basically ended up having to write the whole language myself with no breaks no help and no guidance.

A few weeks before deadline I completely burned out and couldn't do anything other than just sit and stare at the code; mentally exhausted and not in a mood to do anything other than doing mindless unrelated tasks. But alas work had to get done.

And it did get done... Sorta.
Our beautiful statically typed, statically scoped concurrent programming language that was supposed to compile to BEAM code was neither statically typed, statically scoped, and the output ended up being half-working elixir code that only worked on the most specific of cases.

I don't want to work with those guys again.

Do you ever heared about Microsoft Mixer?
Microsoft is not putting money to promote it.

So I decided to have some funzies over the weekend. Started XCOM 2. Built a team for a mission, spent an hour customising. Then I spent 3 hours going through and not failing miserably even once. The last fucking part of the mission, my favourite sniper dies after getting hammered in the face with a fucking laser beam. Then I lose control of the battlefield and everyone dies. Start again because I'm NOT gonna lose my awesome sniper!

This game is like designing software, planning deployment strategies, and disaster recovery at the same time. Recommended for all devs!

I would probably say my cousin.. We cultivate a unique back and forth that generates a powerful bidirectional influence beam. @blackmarket

There are, of course, other honorable mentions.. past/current co workers, ect..

If anyone complains one more time about "windows is built upon a DLL-Hell", i will challenge this specific anyone to implement react into an existing PHP-Project.

Installing matching package versions via npm is the real struggle.
Especially if you decide to be a node psycho who's delivering his react code via webpack.

*projectile vomiting in a straight beam of acid vomit*
Wasted a complete day of my life, dealing with Facebook's naughty shit....

I used vim, Sublime and most recently vscode. I had Webstorm lying around for about 2 months now, and I'd really like to switch to it but it's constant fight, and not one im winning either... :(

Any advice from fellow "devs who rant" ?

I believe that there's some evil dark magic in the BEAM that detects if the user or developer is on a non *nix machine and then purposefully throws all kinds of strange errors or just fucking blows itself up for no reason. Take the shit to a *nix machine and it just works like magic and is easy to work with which is part of the reason why I love it and the ecosystem.

I'm never committing to finishing another PC game ever again... And sticking to arcade, short games only.

Playing Nu no Kuni 2 for the last 3 days... 25hrs and counting... Now at final boss... I think and I can't get infinite HP in Skirmish... So Keep getting entire force wiped out one hit with his laser beam which keeps getting stronger....

It's like a fly vs us. In order to win it's gotta slowly chip away at u, but he can die at an instant any time...

Oh and the 25hrs includes massive cheating and speed hacking to move faster.

I am trying to extract data from the PubSub subscription and finally, once the data is extracted I want to do some transformation. Currently, it's in bytes format. I have tried multiple ways to extract the data in JSON format using custom schema it fails with an error

TypeError: __main__.MySchema() argument after ** must be a mapping, not str [while running 'Map to MySchema']

**readPubSub.py**

import apache_beam as beam
from apache_beam.options.pipeline_options import PipelineOptions
import json
import typing

class MySchema(typing.NamedTuple):
user_id:str
event_ts:str
create_ts:str
event_id:str
ifa:str
ifv:str
country:str
chip_balance:str
game:str
user_group:str
user_condition:str
device_type:str
device_model:str
user_name:str
fb_connect:bool
is_active_event:bool
event_payload:str

TOPIC_PATH = "projects/nectar-259905/topics/events"

def run(pubsub_topic):
options = PipelineOptions(
streaming=True
)
runner = 'DirectRunner'

print("I reached before pipeline")

with beam.Pipeline(runner, options=options) as pipeline:
message=(
pipeline
| "Read from Pub/Sub topic" >> beam.io.ReadFromPubSub(subscription='projects/triple-nectar-259905/subscriptions/bq_subscribe')#.with_output_types(bytes)
| 'UTF-8 bytes to string' >> beam.Map(lambda msg: msg.decode('utf-8'))
| 'Map to MySchema' >> beam.Map(lambda msg: MySchema(**msg)).with_output_types(MySchema)
| "Writing to console" >> beam.Map(print))

print("I reached after pipeline")
result = message.run()
result.wait_until_finish()

run(TOPIC_PATH)

If I use it directly below

message=(
pipeline
| "Read from Pub/Sub topic" >> beam.io.ReadFromPubSub(subscription='projects/triple-nectar-259905/subscriptions/bq_subscribe')#.with_output_types(bytes)
| 'UTF-8 bytes to string' >> beam.Map(lambda msg: msg.decode('utf-8'))
| "Writing to console" >> beam.Map(print))

I get output as

{
'user_id': '102105290400258488',
'event_ts': '2021-05-29 20:42:52.283 UTC',
'event_id': 'Game_Request_Declined',
'ifa': '6090a6c7-4422-49b5-8757-ccfdbad',
'ifv': '3fc6eb8b4d0cf096c47e2252f41',
'country': 'US',
'chip_balance': '9140',
'game': 'gru',
'user_group': '[1, 36, 529702]',
'user_condition': '[1, 36]',
'device_type': 'phone',
'device_model': 'TCL 5007Z',
'user_name': 'Minnie',
'fb_connect': True,
'event_payload': '{"competition_type":"normal","game_started_from":"result_flow_rematch","variant":"target"}',
'is_active_event': True
}

{
'user_id': '102105290400258488',
'event_ts': '2021-05-29 20:54:38.297 UTC',
'event_id': 'Decline_Game_Request',
'ifa': '6090a6c7-4422-49b5-8757-ccfdbad',
'ifv': '3fc6eb8b4d0cf096c47e2252f41',
'country': 'US',
'chip_balance': '9905',
'game': 'gru',
'user_group': '[1, 36, 529702]',
'user_condition': '[1, 36]',
'device_type': 'phone',
'device_model': 'TCL 5007Z',
'user_name': 'Minnie',
'fb_connect': True,
'event_payload': '{"competition_type":"normal","game_started_from":"result_flow_rematch","variant":"target"}',
'is_active_event': True
}

Please let me know if I m doing something wrong while parsing the data to JSON. Also, I am looking for examples to do data masking and run some SQL within Apache Beam

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