How I've got my previous job?
Imagine you are in a wild techno club. Dark aisles, A dj from berlin behind the turntables blasting out hard beats, couples kissing on extasy pills.

And there was a friend I've didn't meet in ages. "how do you do?" she asks. "ah... you know i'm on a job hunt for a year i feel misrable". "really? my dad is looking for somebody, send him your resNZNZNZ!" "WHAT? can't hear you!" "Send him your resume!" "Ahhh! okay great!"

So on 24. december 5pm, snow outside, i've sat on wooden table in the kitchen of her father discussing the conditions for the job. It was the start of a crazy time. Dining with millionaires on their Castles. Shaking hands with top businesses leaders. Going to China and having dinner with the 500 richest chinese at once. Wild!

so my advice for you nerds, don't stay in your comfort zone behind the screen on weekends. Vistit a techno club sometimes. You may find a pretty girl/boy with a CEO as a father.

Dear font creating/licensing world,

fuck you and your stupid license models from the dark ages.
If I use your font to print a few million newspapers is ok and only about 50 bucks but if I want to include it on my website is going to cost me my first born son for every 50k requests?

No making an image and including is not fucking in the mobile first era...

Now I have to use fonts from Google because they are least fucking understand the needs of our times (in terms of font licensing)

Been sitting here for 10 minutes already. Trying to see if we can still support the customers who are stuck in the dark ages. Oh my gaeddd...

Fuck you thesaurus.com!

Those fools, dorks, weirdos and dweebs pioneered, crafted and shared the very architecture that not only holds up your companies your limp dick of backbone but is also the very reason for your pitiful fucking existence.

The brightest minds and best engineers of the 20th century handed your thick headed underachieving ass their creation on a royalty free platter and single handedly gave you - a fucking moron the power to compete with and dominate oxfords gigantic print empire.

We gave you a means to distribute and centralise up to date information globally in seconds only to find you now, back in your cave, living in the dark ages.

Hope you enjoy playing with your rock, you guys really do have an unbelievable amount in common.👌

Do you all remember the dark ages of DVDs when honest customers made a worse deal than pirates because legitimate media was packed with unskippable advertising and PSAs about piracy?

Well, looks like video game publishers are on their best way to recreate that mistake. Why do games nowadays need to be forcefed with storage-consuming, unappealing and technically nonessential launchers that all look and do the same? And why for God's sake do very old and offline-only games need to go through this sodomizing procedure?

prime example: GTA 3 was released back in 2001 and capable of running on Windows 98SE/2000/XP. There's a Steam-only release out there that requires you to install community-made patches if you want the game to run smoothly on modern hardware. Steam itself as a requirement for this atrocity to even launch the executable dropped support for XP more than two years ago. If you'd wanted to play this game on original hardware, you would rely on a real DVD that was made back then, but there are even better options if you know what I mean.

When a multimillion-dollar industry relies on communities of volunteering enthusiasts to make its products work, it won't receive a trace of my empathy when customers and non-customers alike try to download their games from more reliable and honest sources.

Got fed up of waiting for the carrot on the stick that is 'budget approval' and decided to start using trials of IntelliJ and JRebel rather than eclipse and restarting my server everytime I make a change. Now Ive become so accustomed to it that it feels awful knowing that in 30 days I'm back in the dark ages.

If ever there was something like dark ages, then we are living it: which programmer still knows what his statement does through the whole software stack down to the CPU (and could also account for what a modern CPU does with all its cores, caches, pipelines and -1, -2, -3 rings). Piled higher and deeper. I know nothing. So it's like being a cargo cult sorcerer, conjuring copy&pasted spells from SO to invoke Bjarne's, Linus' or whomevers forlorn spirit, so this shit won't break.

Moved house on Friday, everything sorted but will have to wait up to 10 days for broadband and stuff to go live.

It's like living in the dark ages...

The usb drive I just used had a little mechanical switch so that the computer wouldn't recognize it. Why?? When I want to deny a computer access to sth. I just unplug it. It took me ages to figure out what the problem was (the switch was in the same color as the rest of the drive and it is in a really awkward position, also it is dark) and It doesn't make any sense at all. Why, just why?

Supporting IE8...

What tools do you have access to at work?

I don't work a tech company, far from it. I love it but both the hardware and software at my disposal are so shitty I'm starting to lose it.

Running Windows locally, I'm not allowed any Linux distro because "security." Indeed, I don't even have admin rights on my machine. It was rejected. The excuse being that I am sudoer on a server, which (and can only be) physically located in our headquarters.

Today I found out this server's CPU from the dark ages does not support tensorflow, so here I will be building that shit from source tomorrow (no GPU of course).

And thanks for 4G of RAM on what you refer to as a "power" machine.

The world is confusingly entered a dark ages of retards with cell phones and cars

Just about to go in to start a new contract on a greenfield project, using ES5. What is this, the fucking dark ages? I'm not even sure what isn't ES5 anymore...many fails ahead.