How do coders deal with dark circles?

What did ms word tell excel?
Dude I don't wanna deal with your sheet right now.

I didn't know devRant was two months old..you all rant like you've been here since 2011

Never had one due to this trick I borrowed from an old friend.
So we all know about those meetings where its all crap flying around right?.
First go in there with your alarm clock set on vibration every 7 minutes(trust me on this-makes you look important and you ought to be somewhere else)
Actually the alarm is a reminder that you need to bring yourself back online.
At this point just listen to the speaker for a couple of seconds(especially if its marketing dept) and being the engineer your are; rephrase parts of their presentation in a question-comment hybrid( at this point you're the wisest looking person in the room)
Now go back to thinking about that pizza slice you left in the fridge as they discuss the "lean production" methods that they can use based on "your opinion"..
To more happy meetings..cheers

Absolutely bad

I just saw the equalizer 2 at the cinema and about half way through there is a phone with "military grade encryption" on it. We see the phone screen showing the encryption and what is it? Freaking JQuery!

The team spirit in our team has improved over the past 1 month with this etiquette..
*walk up to team member
*no greetings
Just say " bring yourself back online"
Watch them light up..share those ten Westworld seconds..ask for what you need
..and the hell back to your desk
..cheers

When Musk lands us on mars and we set up WiFi please don't send us links with those pop-up ads

Building a repo for my resumes and forking a version based on job description

I didn't know "bandwidth" can be so hard to understand even after 2 hrs explaining..client still wants widgets with autoplay videos..God why?

just saw the humour in the last sentence after sending this to my class..

Yesterday you made fun of my code and told me to discard it, today you want to use it for project deployment?
N I C E
#intern_life

So my Bank Account Number ends with 1 and I had given my details to a person for processing some amount. He got the number wrong and put 0 instead of 1 at the end. After exchanging mails regarding the delay in processing , i got to know about the problem.

So i called him and said - "So i can see that you have got the A/c number wrong. Because you have set the rightmost bit to 0 and it should be 1. umm sorry , i mean - it ends with 1 and not 0 !"

He takes a pause and says - "Ohhh! Really Sorry about that. I will fix it ASAP. And your coffee is on me. Just consider it one's compliment! "

That moment you write and test HTML code on your phone in a metro bus and a brother looks at you like you're from the future

Why does everyone on reddit make fun of HTML?

All hail the one professor who taught me the importance of sharing knowledge

Mind awake;body asleep
mind awake;body asleep
mind awake..

Pose a question to the students and check devRant as they come up with an answer ..which happens to fix that bug on a freelance project you're doing..
<schemes>

Does anyone know of a way to have multiple servo motors run simultaneously (Arduino)

I felt like crying at a startup pitch event..great ideas. crappy presenters
..

*hot chic from office walks up to me*
Her: hi,are you the computer guy?

Me: heey,that's me..wassup

Her: nothing,you just seem different from the others ..you're so calm under all these deadlines.

Me: sure, when I'm frustrated I go to devrant

Her: where's that?

Me: exactly

Her: you're so funny.
Me: wanna grab lunch

* nothing ever happens how I imagine them..except code*

while (200 parts of code !=1 part of coffee;rant++)

Does anyone know how to make a custom rom (android)

boss recently abandoned all my specific beliefs for a more general stance of negativity

everytime I want to rant about my boss I check if drumf is still alive and know there are worse

Why do you think there are more jobs than developers?

When does a developer life turn into a nightmare?
I’m still an intern, senior in school.
All the work I had to do so far was easy, I would get a task to work on for a week and finish it in a day.
When does work really get challenging ?

systemd needs to get rekt

Is it just me who finds coding so relaxing? In all the messy crap flying around it's just me and code..my precious!

Microsoft project
Just make it free already..we use xMind anyway

I love how we spend 5 minutes to go about work, and use the remaining 55 minutes to chitchat at daily meetings.