I had enough of these "Recruiters" bugging me and decided to reply

Fucking take a minute read the god-damn description of the profile to see if they have those skills mentioned at-least

I almost completed the transaction on prod instead of dev. Testing is dangerous.

Install a little tool on all machines that randomly discards every ~200th keyboard input.

Watch them suffer.

The best part of our daily standups is hearing my coworker's daughter whispering "Baba~" in the background, trying to get his attention for whatever reason.

Then when we end the meeting and say bye, you hear her in the background yell "Bye Bye~"

Adds a little cuteness to what usually is a very dull meeting.

People: Uhhhhh CSS is such a bad language it's impossible to maintain it, the cascade is stupid
Also people:

We all get replaced by AI and nobody can understand their source code...

And everyone else just goes: hey it works ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Corporate hackathons are bullshit. I've swore them off. There is no way I'm going to be put in additional hours for so little gain ever again.

Companies have boatloads of money, and they think they can get away giving people $100 Amazon gift cards. SERIOUSLY? You pay for execs in millions of dollars for flapping their mouths.

Make it so that you pay out at least 20k+ to winners and give people something for participating - a nice 1k bonus.

You guys have enough money.

How much arguments you need to change your opinion?

Once I was lead developer, new guy came and he was impossible in his quest to be right. We would argue for three hours, while time passed away. Every day arguments over slack...

Fuck you for testing devs with them online algo tests instead of giving them real projects to do as a way to assess their coding skills

That they exist, and that employers use them for "team building".

Fuck this shit.
I got tested positive this morning.
I might have accidentally infected my parents and my colleagues.

Friday deployment yay!
Bye bye weekend 👋.

Does anyone else here hate people who use numpy panda and tensorflow and call themselves data scientists ??
Cuz I hate 'em. There are so many researchers who work day and night to figure out the math and algos which go into these libraries. These researchers are real data scientists.
If computerss sciemce would have been a religion, then just using these stupid libraries and claiming you are a data scientist would be blasphemy.

Screw the current Stack Overflow community so hard. It's still basically the only place to get answers but I'm sick and tired of the "you missed a period on line 7 why are you even on this site??" attitude. Look here, yeah it's my bad for missing that part, but I'm pretty sure that if you can't figure out that I missed an obvious ".ToArray()" when pulling my code together for a sample, then you aren't gonna be able to answer my bit-shifting question in the first place.

vsinder (VScode tinder) is more of like a GitHub tinder. Nobody looks at the code. all are interested in your GitHub profile picture.

C has too much undefined behaviour because the standards comittee was being lazy and slapped that on a lot of issues that ought to have been implementation defined instead.

The most ridiculous example for UB: An unmatched ' or " character is encountered on a logical source line during tokenization.

Like WTF, that should be a compile time error, and it's easy to detect.

We. Have. Learned. Nothing.

FUCKING PROMISE WONT FUCKING RESOLVE SO MY FUCKING CODE KEEPS FUCKING RETURNING A FUCKING NULL VALUE FOR FUCKING FUCKS SAKE IT REALLY SHOULDNT BE THIS FUCKING HARD TO RESOLVE A FUCKING PROMISE WITHOUT FUCKING CRASHING MY GODDAMN SERVER

About to send my entire department on Vacation Leave today for the next week. We have 3 days of work before we go on holiday leave (next week). And I want to give them a 3 day head start because fuck everyone else and I want me boys to enjoy shit beforehand.

Fuck you, managers do care.

Just a normal friday:
Checking out different frameworks to learn over the weekend and learn none like you have done for the past 3 years.

My employer keeps sending booze to our houses.

Officially meant for coronaproof zoom social meetings where they play stupid bingo games and quizzes on Friday afternoons.

Why they're sending 2 liter bottles of Rum, 3 bottles of rosé wine and 12 cans of craft beer for the 6th week in a row... I really don't know... I don't even attend the zoom meetings.

All I know is that during breakfast, rum is better mixed into coffee than through cornflakes.

Anyway... Why was this a rant again? Oh right. Can I sue my employer for baiting me into an addiction? 🤔

hey devrant here's an idea for a child company DevDate,
a dating site just for developers

Unpopular opinion: having a good shit tops bad sex.

Y'all need to chill!

**DO NOT** downvote a newbie's post without telling them why. It may sound like a spam to you, but it's someone's best effort at an icebreaker joke. 😠

I don't know who I hate more, regular thieves or crackers.
I think the second ones more, because they don't even have the balls to risk in person…

To whoever decided to throw away one week of my life, which I spent in a dark office in July importing a fucking WordPress website, FUCK OFF!

I fucking hate WordPress, I fucking hate migrate websites with it and also dealing with incompatibilities in 30+ plugins and templates that doesn't work properly (Avada, best seller? For being shitty maybe), and now every time I will have to do it I will think about how much I hate you, the bastard who decided to drop those shitty database tables.

And I'm sorry but we won't send you bitcoins just because you watched a tutorial on YouTube and used a vulnerability in phpMyAdmin, so the only think you earned is my hate for you!

Do you catch yourself unintentionally flirting with a co-worker or interviewer?

No sleazy shit this time. No intention of dating, fucking, touching, or whatever. Subtle things like sweet jokes, playfulness, and laughing in a flirty manner (I cannot explain this one further, I'm sorry) then you catch the other person blushing and reciprocating.

We had a senior engineer join us several months ago. He's very smart and one of the best developers I've ever worked with. He has good presence in the tech world. The first time he joined us, I looked at his projects, contributions, and interactions. I thought "Wow, I can't believe I'm working with this guy." He's the opposite of the typical clumsy fucked up developers I work with. He's very sharp and his attention to detail is.. wow.

I have never seen this guy smile and he always looks stressed out or annoyed with our project members. I just mind my own business and learn the new tools he's given us. He's proficient with those while we're all just learning it. I turned the pain into my own little game. This guy has amazing technical skills and attention to details, let's see if I can get him to approve consecutive pull requests from me without a single review point.

After several tries, two straight months of around 2-3 pull requests a week and he gave me a more difficult task that he hasn't done yet himself. I completed it. We talked today and he told me that I'm the only developer he can rely on and that most of them are disappointing. Yes, he's blunt, I like that.

I always felt that he's a lot nicer to me but him telling me so and going on and on with some compliments, dude, I just started joking around and giggling like a school girl. Senpai noticed me and he noticed me hard. I've never seen him smile and laugh like that. He was blushing. After that, our interactions became friendlier.

I'm not saying that he's flirting back or interested. I'm also not pursuing this because I'm with somebody. It's just a thing that I noticed myself doing after the whole interaction. Reminds me a bit of that scene from Black Swan and the confusion of why I find Thomas so damn attractive. "I want to get him." Fills me with inspiration.

Sometimes I write awesome code that executes well as intended with proper file structure and clean codebase and sometimes I bring shame to my family.

A young guy I work with burst into tears today, I had no idea what happened so I tried to comfort him and ask what was up.

It appears his main client had gone nuts with him because they wanted him to make an internet toolbar (think Ask.com) and he politely informed them toolbars doesn't really exist anymore and it wouldn't work on things like modern browsers or mobile devices.

Being given a polite but honest opinion was obviously something the client wasn't used to and knowing the guy was a young and fairly inexperienced, they started throwing very personal insults and asking him exactly what he knows about things (a lot more than them).

So being the big, bold, handsome senior developer I am, I immediately phoned the client back and told them to either come speak to me face-to-face and apologise to him in person or we'd terminate there contract with immediate effect. They're coming down tomorrow...

So part my rant, part a rant on behalf of a young developer who did nothing wrong and was treated like shit, I think we've all been there.

We'll see how this goes! Who the hell wants a toolbar anyway?!