oh btw (can't beleive I forgot to rant about it here!)

i finally got that juicy 6 figure job ;)

i start soon...

thanks ya'll for getting me through the pain and suffering that was this summer's job hunt

but... back to the wagey wagey life... so... ☠️

A discord bot that search jobs using tag [more details]

PM: hi, how are you?
Me: Okay, Not okay
PM: same here --- Okay and not okay.
PM: Also, I see three items are still pending with you. can you give it closure today?
Me: Okay, I will look it now and try to close it.

Found this somewhere and started crying

Assmaster

Thought Spotify had a bug for a moment.. Then i remembered how lame I am. -.-'

Who is is this dude/bot?

oh god, what's the point of this one?

Like one of those jobs that demand 12 years of experience with Kubernetes (which was released 6 years ago)

java --version
FATAL: Unknown parameter

java -v
FATAL: Unknown parameter

*googles get java version*

java -version
openjdk version "1.8.0_252"

FUCK YOU

Code review titles by year:

1990 - your code is using to much memory
1995 - your code is not running on window 95
2000 - your code is slow
2003 - your code don't have tests
2005 - your code is not 64 bit
2009 - your code is not using mvc patters
2010 - your code is not horizontal scalable
2011 - your code should be written in js
2015 - your code is not mobile ready
2020 - your code is racist

My company is a joke so I wrote my resignation in comic sans. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Yeah, I might be late but finally get to watch season 6 of Silicon Valley 😁😁

Peer review is a life saver!!! My colleague just saved me my job as i almost published this fucking block to production.

When you've been getting lots of comments on your pull request and have to keep asking for approval.

Devrant

** mike drop **

P.S. I'm sorry 😂. I love devrant.

😂😂😂😂

How documentation works

What fresh shit is this ?

After using git for all this time... I still can never commit changes correctly .-.

Ohhhh 😂

24 hours with C and I've made this so far. What do you guys think?

Sorry for the quality btw

"Don't deploy on Friday" is a public admittance that your company either has no CI/CD pipeline, or that all your devs are retarded rhesus monkeys who only wipe their ass if the product manager wrote it as a spec.

If the saying was: "Don't port your whole API to GraphQL on a Friday", or "Don't switch from MySQL to Postgres on a Friday", I would agree.

But you should be able to do simple deploys all the time.

I deployed on Christmas & New Year's eve. I've deployed code while high on LSD, drunk-peeing 2 liters of beer against a tree after a party. I've deployed code from the hospital while my foot was being stitched up. On average, we deploy our main codebase about 194 times a week.

If you can't trust your deploys, maybe instead of posting stupid memes about not deploying on Fridays, you should fix your testing & QA procedures.

Hahahaha

> Bang head against issue for days
> Finally get help from lead
> Watch them bang their head against it on video for 40 minutes
> Watch them shake their head in disbelief at how difficult to follow and objectively wrong the existing code is
> Talk through approach to fixing it and patching in the new functionality
> Listen to a short recap
> Ask question, get answer
> Chat about next company meet
> Meeting adjourns
> Jot down implementation notes before I forget
> Remember answer to question, forget everything else

FFFFUUUUUUUUUUU 😭

Java begets JavaScript

If you are sending me data to use, DO NOT FUCKING SEND ME AN IMAGE FROM EXCEL.

Remember guys:

You can fix bugs.
You can’t fix users.

PM has decided to learn linux. Today he asked me if "downloading" linux would make it so he can't use windows anymore.
I ended up sending him a link on how to use the ubuntu shell on windows. Then about half an hour later he asked me why he couldn't type to enter his password. This should be fun...

Trust me, I've been doing this for years.

Best way to deal with numbers in JavaScript:

let x = "1"
x += "1" // add one
x.length // get value of number, 2