Preaching about unit testing but never doing it myself

I want the legendary I phone (x-h)^2 + (v - k)^2 = r^2 !!!

So i just read an article by The Verge on some good and bad things about the pixel 2.

Listed as a con: "Pixel 2 and Pixel 2 XL... have the same camera"

HOW THE FUCK IS THAT A BAD THING!?

So it's bad that they don't cut down the camera on the cheaper phone to make the XL more appealing?

I really don't get wtf they're on about...

:^)
For real though, to each their own in the end.
I accept MacOS for development, but Apple hardware is just price gouging.

Choose a name.

What is really hidden behind iPhone 8...

Friend got a stress ball from devrant. I was so stressed. Installed devrant...

node_modules

An entirely typical exchange at work:

PM: How long would it take to build an application that collates Gubblefluffs and exports them as a PDF?

ME: Hard to say. What’s a Gubblefluff?

PM: Nothing complex. Its basically an object with some stuff in.

ME: Erm, okay. So I’ll define a Gubblefluff object plus methods to add edit and delete, then for each Gubblefluff have it write a line to a PDF.

PM: It will need to email that PDF to somebody.

ME: Okay, cool. “Gubblefluffs-by-email” should take about a day.

6 hours later…

ME: I’ve done Gubblefluffs-to-pdf, I’m not clear on what’s in a Gubblefluff but I’ve made it flexible so it can take almost anything.

PM: No, a Gubblefluff can ONLY be one of 4 Snigglefingers plus a timestamp and some JSON.

ME: What? Right. Okay. What’s a Snigglefinger?

PM: (sighs) A Snigglefinger is the collection of relevant Babelsets.

ME: Babelsets?

PM: Yeah, a user can have any number of Babelsets but they must correspond to one of the four types of Snigglefingers.

ME: There are users!?

PM: Of course!

ME: But I’ve not coded anything for users.

PM: Shit. I’ve told the client they can have it today. How long to add in users?

ME: And Babelsets, and Snigglefingers and the new Gubblefluff rules?

PM: Yeah.

6 days later…

ME: This is done now. It’s a beast but it works. Who should it email the PDFs to?

PM: Client X, plus cc to Y and bcc to Z.

ME: What? It doesn't support CC and BCC!

1 hour later…

ME: This is done. I’ve tested it and sent you a copy of the PDF it generates.

PM: Okay thanks. Is the cron running daily?

ME: What cron?

…

ME: Okay, so the cron’s running once a day at 8pm.

PM: Oh, it’ll need to be at 3:15pm. That’s when we’ve told the client they’ll get it.

ME: Right. I’ll change it...

PM: Also, the PDF you sent me looks nothing like the visual.

ME: What visual?
...

Easyyy !!♥

Can totally relate to this

"Programming is like sex: one mistake and you’re providing support for a lifetime." - Michael Sinz

"Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning." - Rich Cook

That "WOW" feeling when your rant crosses 1k mark and is one of the top 10 rants ever... #awesome #lifegoals

Link to shower more ++s: https://devrant.io/rants/163332/...

You are the CSS to my HTML,
You make my life so beautiful.

You are the JavaScript to my code,
You make my life to be so dynamic and full of life.

You are the OS in my life,
Without you, am useless

You are the C: to my brain,
Without you am nothing.

You are the stack overflow to my problems,
I run to you for solutions.

To be continued.....

JetBrains IDEs hands down. These folks know what devs need.

Anything with Jetbrains on the cover, IDEA, Android Studio, Clion. Can't imagine how I'd work if these IDEs weren't doing half the work for me.

Best one...

Interviewer - so what's your email ID?

Candidate- sir, abc@xyz.com

Interviewer - and password?

Candidate- 12345678

Interviewer - you shared such a confidential information so easily for the job. How can we trust that you will not share any confidential information of the company for some better offers?

Candidate - Sir, I might have shared my password with you but I don't think you can still login to my email account. Let's look for the possibilities. My password can be

12345678

Or

Onetwothreefourfivesixseveneight

Or

1twothreefourfivesixseveneight

1twothreefourfivesixseven8….. so on

Or

2444666668888888 (one 2, three 4….)

13355557777778 (1, two 3, four 5……, 8)….. so on

Or

Combination of all of these…

By the way, did I mention use of capitals? 😂

Finally that candidate was offered with the position as
" HR Manager"

As a Dev,
I hate writing Docs.

As a Dev,
I hate it when there's no Docs.

Vicious Cycle.

Algorithms strike again :D

By the way I really much agree on both rants. People asking questions that they not even once typed into Google. Disturbing my workflow every 5 minutes...

Microsoft is stepping up their game

Friday afternoons be like...

Will take this mug to work from today.

(Picture via Twitter)

!n case someone is unfamiliar with this joke ::

A man flying in a hot air balloon suddenly realizes he’s lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts to get directions, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"

The man below says: "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."

"You must work in Information Technology," says the balloonist.

"I do" replies the man. "How did you know?"

"Well," says the balloonist, "everything you have told me is technically correct, but It's of no use to anyone."

The man below replies, "You must work in management."

"I do," replies the balloonist, *"But how'd you know?"**

"Well", says the man, "you don’t know where you are or where you’re going, but you expect me to be able to help. You’re in the same position you were before we met, but now it’s my fault."

I just wanted some water :(

“Knock, knock.”

“Who’s there?”

very long pause….

“Java.”

-courtesy of a software engineering professor

My advice for new devs, or to all of us :)

This is way too true!

Worst part of being a dev: "we need this done by the end of the week"

Me: "ok what are the specifications?"

PMs: "not sure yet, we have a meeting with the client on Thursday."

Me: "cool, I'll look at it Monday."

Don't come to me with deadlines before you know what I'm building.