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AboutI am a wizzzard. What more would you like to know?
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SkillsPHP hacker, jQuery wannabe, JavaScript n00b, game dev wizzzard
Joined devRant on 5/17/2017
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Is there a common style name/popular origin for the style of whitespace in code where you put spaces inside parentheses but not after keywords in control statements, or after function names? (See img)
This is my preferred whitespace method (in most languages), but I don't know where I adopted it from, if anywhere... ;P16 -
Dev Diary Entry #56
Dear diary, the part of the website that allows users to post their own articles - based on an robust rights system - through a rich text editor, is done! It has a revision system and everything. Now to work on a secure way for them to upload images and use these in their articles, as I don't allow links to external images on the site.
Dev Diary Entry #57
Dear diary, today I finally finished the image uploading feature for my website, and I have secured it as well as I can.
First, I check filesize and filetype client-side (for user convenience), then I check the same things serverside, and only allow images in certain formats to be uploaded.
Next, I completely disregard the original filename (and extension) of the image and generate UUIDs for them instead, and use fileinfo/mimetype to determine extension. I then recreate the image serverside, either in original dimensions or downsized if too large, and store the new image (and its thumbnail) in a non-shared, private folder outside the webpage root, inaccessible to other users, and add an image entry in my database that contains the file path, user who uploaded it, all that jazz.
I then serve the image to the users through a server-side script instead of allowing them direct access to the image. Great success. What could possibly go horribly wrong?
Dev Diary Entry #58
Dear diary, I am contemplating scrapping the idea of allowing users to upload images, text, comments or any other contents to the website, since I do not have the capacity to implement the copyright-filter that will probably soon become a requirement in the EU... :(
Wat to do, wat to do...1 -
Whelp. I started making a very simple website with a single-page design, which I intended to use for managing my own personal knowledge on a particular subject matter, with some basic categorization features and a simple rich text editor for entering data. Partly as an exercise in web development, and partly due to not being happy with existing options out there. All was going well...
...and then feature creep happened. Now I have implemented support for multiple users with different access levels; user profiles; encrypted login system (and encrypted cookies that contain no sensitive data lol) and session handling according to (perceived) best practices; secure password recovery; user-management interface for admins; public, private and group-based sections with multiple categories and posts in each category that can be sorted by sort order value or drag and drop; custom user-created groups where they can give other users access to their sections; notifications; context menus for everything; post & user flagging system, moderation queue and support system; post revisions with comparison between different revisions; support for mobile devices and touch/swipe gestures to open/close menus or navigate between posts; easily extendible css themes with two different dark themes and one ugly as heck light theme; lazy loading of images in posts that won't load until you actually open them; auto-saving of posts in case of browser crash or accidental navigation away from page; plus various other small stuff like syntax highlighting for code, internal post linking, favouriting of posts, free-text filter, no-javascript mode, invitation system, secure (yeah right) image uploading, post-locking...
On my TODO-list: Comment and/or upvote system, spoiler tag, GDPR compliance (if I ever launch it haha), data-limits, a simple user action log for admins/moderators, overall improved security measures, refactor various controllers, clean up the code...
It STILL uses a single-page design, and the amount of feature requests (and bugs) added to my Trello board increases exponentially with every passing week. No other living person has seen the website yet, and at the pace I'm going, humanity will have gone through at least one major extinction event before I consider it "done" enough to show anyone.
help4 -
A big, fat FUCK YOU to everyone who pushes out app-updates with generic "Improvements for speed and reliability" changelogs. I hope you and all your descendants, relatives, friends and pets get huge, hairy, painful warts between your buttcheeks that grow larger every day and return after every attempt to have them removed. Fuck you, and fuck your bullshit updates.
And if there are any devs on devRant guilty of this behaviour, fuck you too. I hope your sexual organs rot and fall off, and that you lose all your upvotes.7 -
May the people responsible for the decision to let Windows 10 wake up people's PCs from sleep mode in the middle of the night to install patches and then force-restart be tortured for eternity in hell. All of the hells. Of every religion. At the same time. While having to stare at a Windows ME bluescreen of death without the ability to blink or look away. For 65535 eternities. Followed by a buffer overflow.5
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Modt excited about code was three days ago, when I managed to make SpeedTrees (that are painted on Unity terrains and not detectable as different from the terrain while using raycasts) transparent when they appear between the camera and the character :P
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Went for a job interview today, and learned something very important about myself...
...that I should be permanently banned from writing code on whiteboards, for any reason. I have never seen such ugly code in my entire life. Ugh...5 -
So far this month I applied for 15+ game development related jobs, and spent ages carefully crafting customized cover letters and resumes for each particular job. Didn't get as much as a "thank you for your application".
Then, for the one random job application I applied to on LinkedIn using my most generic resume, and no cover letter, I get a near instant response and an invitation to coordinate day/time for an interview in person. Wtf.
Anyway, hope I get the job, because I'm running out of food.12 -
Created a tool that game-masters/admins for some online game servers could use to administrate their servers. Using Visual Basic 6.0... Back in 1999...
No successful projects since. *sad panda*1 -
Cute Girl: So you're like a computer guy, right?
Me in 2012: Yeah, I do some programming and...
Cute Girl: Ok *walks away*
Me in 2012: ........wait, come back! Don't go! I'll fix your printer for you! Or hack your friend's fb. Or make this cool app that you maybe have an idea for..? Don't leeeeeav...ah nvm, she's gone.5 -
Best dev experience...a colleague who was my team lead when I joined a company as a "from-scratch" PHP developer, and gave me a ton of tips, assistance, encouragement and praise along the way. And for the bits that were not so good (on my part), he gave me constructive criticism delivered in a friendly and helpful way rather than chew me out.
And when the boss(es) of the company talked shit behind my back in meetings I was not invited to, about things they had no clue about (my performance as a developer)) he defended me and set the record straight.
Later he was demoted from team lead for office politics reasons. But was doing the same job as before, for less pay. Never complained.
His job consisted of, all at once, being the company IT/server/printer guy, first line customer support over phone and remote desktop, .NET and PHP developer, course holder to teach our customers how to use our product, and mentor to me.
Good guy. I'd give him a ++ if I could. -
When you spend 6 hours figuring out how to best encrypt/decrypt your unimportant website cookies just because you don't want people to see how bad you are at naming stuff :x
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I hate infinitely scrolling pages. There is no way of knowing (or at least, nobody is telling) how far you have to scroll to reach the end. Though I guess the answer is kinda given already; "infinitely". Fuck, I'll be scrolling for a while, then.11
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Most pissed off I've ever been at work when was I attending some development meeting about the "slow progress we were making", in which the boss (same one giving us shit for being slow) came up with several new good ideas that he wanted implemented ASAP. Same thing he'd been doing all year; fucking up our plans and adding a metric shitton of feature creep. I tried to give realistic estimates for how long it would take to implement, and casually mentioned that working on this would also push back the other stuff on our plate, but he snapped at me and accused me of being a "negative influence" and "sabotaging the project", and went on in a long rant about how we didn't take the work seriously enough and that we didn't put in enough effort.
I was a hair's breadth away from flying over the table and strangling him with his keyboard cable, and the only thing that kept me in check was the tiny amount of steam I vented by snapping the pen I was holding in two. We'd been working overtime every day for months to try to meet his insane demands and accomodate him by doing all the changes and additions he wanted done, and I found his tirade - mainly targeted at me - highly unfair.
Somehow I managed to exercise restraint, and I'm not sure if he even realized what happened.1 -
I wish I could finish the game I have worked on (solo, on and off alongside regular job) for many years now. It's a callback to online gaming days of old (think BBS games) wrapped in a modern, nice looking package.2
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Declined a job offer with a startup, partly because of imposter syndrome. Applied for position as programmer, showed up for interview and got cold feet when it turned out they actually wanted/needed a senior programmer/chief technology officer and offered me the position after having asked me no technical questions, seen none of my code or previous projects.
Still, it was a job that paid money... And I'm still jobless two months later :(7 -
Glassdoor.com is in hot water after federal investigators in the US sent a subpoena to unmask anonymous users who might be "third party witnesses" to certain business practices by a company under investigation for fraud.
Can DevRant (@dfox, @trogus) be forced to unmask its users (IPs, emails) in a any way, by the US government (@fbi, @cia, @nsa) or any other government (@svr_rf, @mss, @mi6, @bnd), should a similar situation arise?15 -
When your old boss is too lazy to write a LinkedIn recommendation for you, and tells you to write it on his behalf and then mail it to him so he can post... Hmm... 🤔2
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At a previous job, boss & owner of company would waste hours of my time to show me, at his own desk, every small detail of some random feature he had fallen in love with on some random webpage he found, while saying "I don't want to disrupt your plans or anything, this is just something to keep in the back of your minds, as this would be a really nice thing to have, even tho none of the clients have asked for this and I have asked no one else for a second opinion, and I will most likely ask you to remove this feature in the future because I will finally have realized it wasn't that good an idea anyway."
Ok dipshit, what the fuck are we supposed to do with this information? Every week from this moment on you will ask whether we have found the time to implement this feature, even though you are fully aware that our schedule has no room for random, unplanned features and that we are already not able to meet the unreasonable deadline you pulled out of your ass two weeks into a development process that would end up taking 8+ months.
We are already overworked, we already work hours upon hours of unpaid overtime, and yet you still think it reasonable to pull us away from our work every other fucking day to talk about random extra features you want added, but don't want added to the roadmap because you want no delays... Fuck you, fuck your toxic attitude, fuck your meetings where you spend half an hour complaining about features we are still in the process of developing the backend functionality for (on test servers) not having the right font colour for the text, and fuck your legacy desktop software originally written in COBOL that you now want moved to "the cloud".
I would rather be unemployed and live as a hobo on the streets with a "will code for food" sign than work for you ever again. -
In a previous job as a system developer I had an office with a door. Unfortunately, the boss of the company had heard of "open door"-policies, and insisted on all physical doors being open all the time so he could pop his head in unannounced every 15 minutes with random chit chat and to see how work was going... :x2
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That feeling when you've been programming, scripting and developing games, software and web pages for nearly a decade and you still feel like a talentless hack that doesn't deserve the wages you are paid, and constantly fear being exposed as a fraud by your peers... :x6
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If your manager asks for a "rough time estimate" for a project, there is a higher than 99% chance that your answer will be written down and be used in presentations of project roadmap to upper management and/or marketing, who will create a hard deadline based on your rough estimate and communicate this to customers/clients, and then blame you for not keeping the deadline when it turns out (as it always does) that the rough estimate was off by several months because feature creep caused by upper management.3
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My dev superpower would be to grok interfaces and be able to easily explain, to anyone who asks, their function and purpose (in 140 characters or less).1
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In the past: "Alright, have the day off, so can do some serious work (work on my game project). Let me just check my mail first... And a cpl of sub-reddits... And see if there are any updates for Unit3D, or any interesting forum posts, or new assets on asset store that look nice... And check some online newspapers just to see if anything is going on... And check if anything new has been posted on slashdot since I last checked 5 minutes ago (nope)... And maybe see if there's any updates to Sublime Text or new useful packages that can help improve workflow... Ooh came across article on how to improve workflow... Hm someone mentioned a new task-management system in comments, gotta check that out... I'll just sign up for a demo-account and... Hm but what if there are any better ones? Better google for comparisons. Wait, isn't there a new episode of Silicon Valley today? Gotta see that first, no time tmr. Hmm also new episode of Archer, and American Gods. Better get watching these out of the way first, or I can't concentrate... Ah, wait, it's dinner time, no point starting anything until after that."
Now: All of the above, plus "I'll just check devRant real quick before I... hmm... interesting rant... *scrolls and reads rants and comments for 3 hours*"
How am I supposed to get any work done? :_(3 -
When AI steal all the dev jobs, I will become upper management and do my best to confuse them by demanding they implement impossible things like 7 straight, red lines that are all perpendicular to eachother, and that are all blue.3