Putting a (programming language) sticker on your laptop automatically makes you an expert in the language, guaranteed. 💯

Just found this piece of code from one of my coworkers:

restMethod() {
try {
// some complicated logic
} catch (WebApplicationException e) {
throw e;
}
}

Why?!

And btw: Hi fellow devRant ppl! 👋

School thought me which "cutting-edge" technologies I should avoid at all costs:

"I want to fucking die" - tier:
- JQuery UI
- JSP
- JSF
- Vanilla PHP
- Java 5 and earlier
- Java and Rest
- Old Eclipse

"Mastering the art of headbanging" - tier:
- JPA
- JQuery

You may argue that some of them are not as bad as I think of them but the I was introduced to them made me despise them. We were never introduced to the documentations. Only to the sheets our teacher prepared and I think he completely pissed the point of some of them.

Rest example:
/resource/{resource_id}/action/{action_id}/username/{username}/password/{password}

When you're alone with your dev problems but still you have the best code partners anyway :D

I don't want to hear about Java, JPA, JSP, Json or John ever again or i will have a mental breakdown

Next generation programming language

What's your best code comments ?

Here is mine ! Wrote few days back..

I HATE SPRING JPA HIBERNATE AND EVERYTHING RELATED TO FUCKING JAVA.

Everything behaves like it was created with a human as an afterthought, so it torments people and target audience are masochists. This whole ecosystem is an abomination of the software world.

Every fucking error has a thousand possible solutions for every single person AND NOT A SINGLE ONE WORKS!!!

The stupid thing will just keep throwing its internal problems in a stack DUMP DIARRHEA that you have to sort through to find anything remotely useful! I DON’T give a fuck about your stupid internal implementation, just tell me what the fuck you want!

And you have to play the guess game and find the right combination of their stupid little configurations to make it barely work. I couldn’t believe reading stackoverflow, people are just poking at it hoping it will work. And I’m literally stuck and can’t fix the damn thing no mater what I do, and I’m abandoning it.

I won’t touch this pice of shit with a twenty meter pole ever again! Last time I was this frustrated was the stupid java ee. Nothing in the software world has frustrated me this much. How does one even come up with this…
I’m done… I’m just done…

The first time I've used JPA and Lombok annotations and suddenly didn't have to bother about getters and setters anymore and pretty much persisted my whole data tables with no effort.

Total game changer for me.

To fetch 100 users at once, i used JPA hibernate findAll() method. Simple fucking enough. I realized this shit is slow. Takes a while to fetch and 100 records aint even a lot!

This shit needs over 265 ms to fetch 100 users

About 75 ms to fetch 20 users

That shits terrible!

Then i wrote a custom JDBC class with custom SQL queries to fetch the exact same shit.

Now it fetched 100 users in 7 ms, 37x times faster for performance

I havent even optimized indexing or did shit. I just avoided using jpa hibernate

Someone explain this to me

O.M.F.G how much longer is that gonna take?!?! It's been 2 days already! 2 fucking days!!!

That's it. Fuck the docs. I'm going hardcore now: hooking up a debugger and diving into the unseen depths of Spring's automatic JPA repo initialization.

Unless any one of you knows how to
1. Manually create jpa repo interface bean
2. Make transactions work [also enable them manually by declaring beans in @Configuration]

and do all this in a single @Bean method. Jpa provider - hibernate.

Nobody? Not a single one? Allright then, I'm going in :(

Damn @&$#%£¥ hibernate. Why is ur API so $£¥%#*^ inconsistent and buggy????
@Index on mappedsupertype any? @index causing duplicate tables on hsqldb?? REALLY????
Why does it work on mysql?
Maxresults and fetch joins cause ALL rows to be fetched, instead of properly generating a „limited subselect“? WHYYYYYY, JUST WHY????

Spring JPA might be annoying sometimes...

public MyResult findFirstByIdentities_CompanyIdAndIdentities_UserIdAndFromDateAndToDateAndFormatAndIdentities_SourceAndStatusInAndCreatedOnAfterOrderByCreatedOnDesc(String companyId, String userId, Date fromDate, Date toDate, String format, String source, Collection<String> status, Date createdOn) {...}

I know I know, efficiency is weeping in a dark corner. Will deal with it later

I'm starting to fucking hate jpa.

TFW when you've been trying to figure out why your apparently flawless JPA database query won't return anything and realize you forgot to populate the database after setting up the docker-image....

Programming. Where listening to music and ignoring collegues means you're hard at work.

Hey guys, who has experience with JPA/hibernate RESTful performance numbers.
Interesting would be:
* persistence operations per second, and the response times
* proportion between read/write for a typical rest service

Rightnow i get ~300ms read, 900ms write at 350 concurrent requests. 75% write operations

I more or less ruled out my custom code, problem seems to be hibernate (of course ...😋)

Stack: jetty, jackson, hibernate, mysql

I don't know... I'm very sceptic about JPA. I worked on a project using this technology and having much trouble and now I'm working on the second one, but sincerely I prefer the standard SQL approach. What do you think guys about this framework?

A guy who thought the only way to access data was through a relational data base and the only way to access a data base from java was JPA

JPA my friend ... JPA why are you like this? JPA why do hate me so much? JPA, let's have a word ...

How come you are so far away from real-world problems, so cumbersome to use, so ugly (criteria API), so wrong and inconsistent?
Oh, what it's all your parents fault? Oh come, on that can't be, right? Did you have a bad childhood?

Your parent's were fucking crack-smoking maniacs which didn't know a single bit about actual databases?
They design you as an API without actually trying you out in the wild? And then they patched up together with some essential DB stuff, like friggin indexes? Not even tried to make this API consistent nor really functional?

Oh poor, you little JPA ...

Fucking Quarkus. Fucking Panache. Fucking ORM.
I wanted to do a fucking simple projection. First this piece of fuck, the Panache, won't let me do a Projection because of a fucking bug, that haven't implemented it properly until 2.12 (fuck and you call this v2?). Ok, upgraded, to the latest 2.16, cuz why the fuck, i'm upgrading already. But now the whole fucking quarkus app won't start! Noice! Ok, fuck it, let's go down exactly to 2.12. Quarkus started, perfect. But now, this pice of fuck Hibernate says 'collection was evicted' whenever i tried to read a collection in the setter (Access.PROPERTY), which worked just fucking fine before. But okay, fuck you. I'll write a @PostLoad method, fine, just fuck off.
But that's not the end! Now it says I cannot write `select parent.someColl is not null and parent.collection is empty as canProcess` because "is empty" only supported in where clauses. What fucking wonderful system! Well, fuck you. I'll write a union query. But guess what! JPA standard does not support union queries, nor HQL (Eclipse Link does, btw). Ok, fuck this shit, let's write a native query. But hey, fucking Panache does not support that. There is no fucking place in their fucking docs stating anything about how to use native queries.
So, fuck you quarkus, fuck you panache, fuck you hibernate, fuck you overcomplicated limiting bullshit called full-fledged ORMs. I'm moving to a fucking mybatis and fuck it. It's simple as fuck, does not fucking restrict me in writing whatever shit query I want to write and let's me map the shit just fine.

What was the idea behind java spring (jpa) and creating/using like a million annotations? There are annotations for literally everything...