Manager: "How long do you think this will take?"

My brain:
Don't do it
Don't do it
Don't do it
Don't do it
Don't do it
Don't do it
Don't do it
Don't do it

Me: "Shouldn't take too long"

I need a life.

When you see it 😂😂

Here’s a poster with a super short description of each one to help you keep track and find some new useful Linux tools.

Never underestimate engineers XD

What Every Programmer Should Know About Memory

https://akkadia.org/drepper/...

"please wait 5 seconds 'till you can continue with the call" *additional charges apply

https://dev.to/rly
Enjoy.

In my current company we're being forced to use Windows for web development... I can't use a VM because of the hardware specs.

This is now my screensaver.

That time when I was wrong, the client was wrong, but my algorithm was right.

I'm proud of you son

Code reviewing a pull request directly for production when suddenly...

Me and my girlfriend are arguing, because I'm programming a lot and I don't have time to give her attention. She said if I don't give her attention, she will break up with me.
Any suggestion where I can find a good tutorial for C#?

😂😂😂😂😂😂

When your coworker appreciates your code saying it's neat and beautiful

Fixing memory leaks 101

Source :
https://reddit.com/r/...

!rant

So I went for a movie last night in one the biggest malls in my city and this is what I found.

This is the pic of one of those touch screen monitors they have for information..

Come on guys.

Hahaha 😂😂

Why is C++ the first language taught in schools when Ruby is a much simpler and fun language?

History says because the courses didn't get updated.

Conspiracy theory says it's to keep out people who can't deal with complexity.

Le me having a chit chat with a student after sharing about programming in my former high school..

Student: "I learnt Java the other day, and I don't really like it"

Me: "Why?"

Student: "Because we can import existing packages on the community to do almost anything"

Me: "And? How is that bad for you?"

Student: "It's not very challenging, isn't it? I want to build everything in my program with my own code!"

Me: [silence]

Me: "Listen here, you little shit..."

Heartless

The best prank played in our office was an AutoHotkey script that changed the space character to actually print the word 'space' in all caps.

The next message in Hipchat from the victim was: "WhatSPACEtheSPACEfuck!SPACEMySPACEkeyboardSPACEisntSPACEworking!"

The next time this prank was pulled, ALL symbols were typed out in all caps.

So a Redditor decided to inspect element an adult's website. Why am I not surprised

Master was successfully deleted

My first calculator

I made a hotkey script for a colleague that made the backspace act like a left arrow. You should've seen his face when he saw the cursor moving back but not removing characters.

And that's why we're all single...

- Sleep 7h+ each night (you think you don't need it - but you do!)
- drink NO coffee (you've slept enough!)
- pair-up (you're not as good as you think)
- get a grasp on the problem (it's time will spent!)
- communicate constantly (you're not alonw especially)
- refactor just as much
- learn from you partner
- celebrate even small accomplishments (you need success!)
- go home and do something else (your pet project does not need more than 5hrs per week!)
- repeat (because repetition makes perfection!)

Most embarrassing and lucky moment on the first week of job.

Me and my best friend were selected in the same company as developers. I was having some trouble with my system. So I mailed the description to our support department. Pop up was displayed from our chat client and person on the other end happened to be a lady. She wanted me to share a team viewer link with click access. So I did it and within 2 minutes of efforts she solved it. I thanked her, closed the chat conversation and started installing few packages. Meanwhile, I was curious to see her as she was really nice throughout the conversation. So I opened LinkedIn, searched for her name and found her profile. I zoomed in her photo and she was a pretty chick. I didn't stop and found her on FB too, and quickly saw all her DPs. I just copied her profile URL and sent it to my friend ( the one that got selected with me ) and told him about my conversation with her. Then I asked my friend
"She's hot. Should I send her a friend request or have to find some more troubles in my pc and talk to her few more times ? :P "
He replied "Dude what are you wanting for ? "
Out of no where, a pop up showed up. It was the girl we were talking about. The exact message was

"You can now close your team viewer session, and we can talk over FB :)"

Embarrassing AF!

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