Haha.. Wtf? 😂😂😂😂😂😂

newsthump.com/2018/09/13/iphone-xs-to-include-revolutionary-arsehole-recognition-technology/

Immortalised this actual legacy code for our Senior Devs leaving present (we all inherited this) with his last task being to refactor it, may he never have to work with code like this again.

okay, I promise.

Beating https://regexcrossword.com/ felt good.

But I have to admit: I could not beat the last one without breakpoint in the validation JS code. ;)

Being a web dev actually proved useful - free hinting system!

"serverless" is a stupid name. There's always a server, just not yours. It's just as dumb as people thinking "cloud" means there's no computer. There's always a computer, just not yours.

Hahahhahaha, it is...

Machine Learning messed up!

CSS at its best

So apparently Linux has more contributors than Github can count

Another attempt at trying to get support for weakening encryption recently.

An FBI spokesperson said something like 'we can put people on the moon, why can't we just create law enforcement-accessible encryption? i just don't buy it."

Fuck off and die.

When you're a freelance web developer with 3 years of experience and they be teaching you basics of programming in college

In PHP, this:
<?php
if($a < $b) {
$c = 'W';
} elseif($a > $b) {
$c = 'E';
} else {
$c = ' ';
}
?>

Does the same as this:
<?php
$c = ' WE'[$c<=>$a];
?>

How cool is that?!? xD

Try if you can

I find the way to collect the garbage.

Why is starting a C++ project so overly complicated and annoying?!

So many different compilers. So many ways to organize the files. So many inconsistencies between Linux and Windows. So many outdated/lacking tutorials. So many small problems.

Why is there almost no good C++ IDEs? Why is Visual Studio so bizarre? Why are the CMake official tutorials literally wrong? Why can't we have a standard way to share binaries? Why can't we have a standard way to structure project folders? Why is the linker so annoying to use?

Don't get me wrong, I quite like the language and I love how fast it is (one of the main reasons I decided to use it for my project, which is a game almost comparable to Factorio)... But why is simply starting to write code such a hassle?

I've been programming in Java for years and oh god I miss it so much. JARs are amazing. Packages are amazing. The JDK is amazing. Everything is standardized, even variable names.

I'm so tempted to make this game in Java...

But I can't. I would have a garbage collector in the way of its performance...

And THAT is how you stuff a 4x8 bitmap into a single int.

Yesterday: "This fucking logic makes no sense. I can't work this shit out!"

Today (first look at the problem): "Oh... I think if I do this and this... Yeap, that'd work"

I love fresh brain thoughts in the morning.

OC'nt.

Outrageous!!!

Internet is down at work, I love being paid to do nothing 😏

Me: Oh I see were using a non-standard architecture on this app. I like this bit but what is this doing? never seen it before.

Him: Ah we use that to abstract the navigation layer.

Me: oh ok, interesting idea, but that means we need an extra file per screen + 1 per module. We also can't use this inbuilt control, which I really like, and we've to write a tonne of code to avoid that.

Him: Yeah we wanted to take a new approach to fix X, this is what we came up with. Were not 100% happy with it. Do you have any ideas?

**
Queue really long, multi-day architecture discussion. Lots of interesting points, neither side being precious or childish in anyway. Was honestly fantastic.
**

Me: So after researching your last email a bit, I think I found a happy middle ground. If we turn X into a singleton, we can store the state its generating inside itself. We can go back to using the in-built navigation control and have the data being fetched like Y. If you want to keep your dependency injection stuff, we can copy the Angular services approach and inject the singletons instead of all of these things. That means we can delete the entire layer Z.

Even with the app only having 25% of the screens, we could delete like 30+ files, and still have the architecture, at a high level, identical and textbook MVVM.

Him: singleton? no I don't like those, best off keeping it the way it is.

... are you fucking kidding me? You've reinvented probably 3 wheels, doubled the code in the app and forced us to take ownership of something the system handles ... but a singleton is a bad idea? ... based off no concrete evidence or facts, but a personal opinion.

... your face is a bad idea

Please put this on all IT-Office-Doors today! Happy sysadminday! 🎉🎉

clients union

Do you follow test driven development?

testing

Shitty pickup lines #1

Haha 😂, actual code from 3rd party product we use:

Dynamically typed languages are barbaric to me.

It's pretty much universally understood that programmers program with types in mind (if you have a method that takes a name, it's a string. You don't want a name that's an integer).

Even it you don't like the verbosity of type annotations, that's fine. It adds maybe seconds of time to type, which is neglible in my opinion, but it's a discussion to be had.

If that's the case, use Crystal. It's statically typed, and no type annotations are required (it looks nearly identical to Ruby).

So many errors are fixed by static typing and compilers. I know a person who migrated most of the Python std library to Haskell and found typing errors in it. *In their standard library*. If the developers of Python can't be trusted to avoid simple typing errors with all their unit tests, how can anyone?

Plus, even if unit testing universally guarded against typing errors, why would you prefer that? It takes far less time to add a type annotation (and even less time to write nothing in Crystal), and you get the benefit of knowing types at compile time.

I've had some super weird type experiences in Ruby. You can mock out the return of the type check to be what you want. I've been unit testing in Ruby before, tried mocking a method on a type, didn't work as I expected. Checked the type, it lines up.

Turns out, nested away in some obscure place was a factory that was generating types and masking them as different types because we figured "since it responds to all the same methods, it's practically the same type right?", but not in the unit test. Took 45 minutes on my time when it could've taken ~0 seconds in a statically typed language.

Sums up my journey from intern to Jr. Developer

macOS 😂😂😂😂