Javascript is trash.
PHP is trash.
Java is trash.
Go is trash.
Scala is trash.
Your mum is trash.
Everything is trash.

DevRant summarised in one post.

is it bad to put your jsx in useState for react?

const = handleClick = (sort) => {
if(sort.props.id == 'default'){
setSort(<ArrowUpward id='up'/>)
}
else if(sort.props.id == 'up'){
setSort(<ArrowDownward id='down'/>)
}
else if(sort.props.id == 'down'){
setSort(<LineAxis id='default'/>)
}
}

the other alternative is using template logic which i think looks uglier, someone told me i did server side rendering in the browser

(backstory -> I have 10 years of experience as a software engineer)

Me: So I would like to develop myself to become "officially" a senior engineer

Manager: sure, you basically need to show consistent behaviour

Me: ok, but what specifically? on what criteria do you determine when it is time for promotion?

Manager: there isn't anything like that defined yet, we would like to work on a definition of roles and responsibilities, but we're not there yet

Me: ok but how did you do it so far?

Manager; well as I said, you have to show consistent behaviour that characterises you as a senior.

Me: ....

New form of self-inflicated torture:

Formatting changelogs . .

https://github.com/ElectronicsArchi...

CODING CODING CODING HAHAHA I LOVE PROGRAMMING BEING A LITTLE CODE SLUT. I LOVE SILICON VALLEY IM SUCH A QUIRKED UP LITTLE CODE SHAWTY LOOKING FOR SOME ALGOASS 🍆💦😩.

“Slams fists on keyboard”

I LOVE BEING A CUTE SCREEN TWINK, IMPRESSING PAPI CEO WITH MY FINGER COMBINATIONS. I LOVE PLEASING EXECUDADDY. 🍑😏🫦

“Takes keyboard in hand and slams it against desk until keyboard keys explode everywhere”

I LOVE WATCHING THE AMERICAN GOVERNMENT AND CORPORATE AMERICA FUCK MY ASS IN RETURN FOR PERSONAL PROFITS. 🤑☔️

*digs fingernails into the wall and claws off paint and then snorts it”
*pees and shits pants*
*cries in corner with extra agony*

So there was that paranoid schizophrenic person, a blonde girl with a buzz cut, and somehow she was a friend of mine. She used a Linux distro called “!!!!!!!!____!!!!!”, and convinced me it was the best distro out there. But the way she used it was… very specific.

She called me. She told me the new distro was out, this time it was called “!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”, and _this_ was the best one. It finally allowed her to observe the area around her neighbourhood right from her PC, through some app, and make pits in the ground. It was done with a touchscreen of a Nintendo DSi connected to her PC with something that looked like an IDE cable. You touch the area of the screen, and the pit will appear outside IRL. This was needed to trap swine-looking creatures in those pits, as they infested the land and were attacking people in packs, turning them into dirty, greyish, half-transparent lumps of gel.

I went to see her, and somehow I knew exactly how it's going to end, as if I decided to replay a game level. She lived in a rotten, mouldy, dark, half-abandoned condo building. She was also a terrible hoarder. I approach the old wooden door of her flat. It was painted over 1000 times and was barely closing. She knew I would come. She rushed outside, looked at me with her moon-sized eyes, grabbed my arm and told me:
“We have to run.”

I felt a sudden crippling rush of anxiety. I woke up. My heart was absolutely racing. My sight became darker and darker. The chest pain was consuming me, and I could barely move. I almost vomited.

That was quite a night.

Fun fact: master’s degree is now called main degree

Any OS discussion on devRant be like

Whoever said that "The IT Crowd" is a good TV Series...

WTF?
It's so... lame.... Are all the British comedies like that?

windows is fucking bullshit

Someone on a Facebook group asking how they can make a video auto-play with sound at maximum when a visitor hits the home page.

Me: Here’s how: Log into your site via SSH and cd to the docroot. Type “rm -rf” and hit Enter. Then throw your laptop in the river and go work at McDonald’s. Because if you are stupid enough to ask this question, you are too stupid to be allowed to own a website.

Fuck you off mainland china microdick script kiddies

windows is less like an operating system & more like a trash.

😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏😏

Boy do I hate office politics...

A client asked our company to fix perf issues on their product. Our coleagues had been picked for the job [being led by another 3rd-party, as per client's request]. Aaand they dropped the ball. The deadline is in 2 weeks, nothing is working.

Mgmt engaged us to put out the fire, but strictly at the scope the other guys were working in.

On the first day of testing we've revealed an elephant-sized perf issue that's as easy to fix as brainlessly changing 4 values in config. And that elephant is masking all the other perf issues.

We got a firm NO for config changes as that is out of the defined scope. And we're asked to continue testing.

I mean, the elephant is THAT huge that any further testing is moot - all other bottlenecks are hidden behind it. And just changing those 4 values would reduce the resources required by a magnitude of ~10.

But that's out of scope...

Client is desperate, lost and honestly asking us, pros in the field, for help.. We know how to help.. It takes 10 seconds to apply the fix..

But our mgmt forbids us to step out of the scope :/

as a result we have to pretend to be dummies hardly knowing what to do and hide the truth from the customer they so desperately want.

This is frustrating. And wrong. And imo unprofessional

ahaha. The white Slack emoji skintone is frowned upon at $work, and we're encouraged to use the yellow one instead to be "inclusive" -- but fear not, the brown ones are totally fine.

Gotta love woke companies.

Early in my database developer career, I started a new job at a mortgage company. I was poking around the code, just getting familiar with things.

One script identified properties in certain states/territories for special handling:

AND STATECD IN (‘PR’, ‘HI’, ‘AL’)

I thought “Puerto Rico, Hawaii, and ALABAMA?? One of these things is not like the other…”

Yeah, that was supposed to be Alaska (AK)… But they’ve been special-handling properties in Alabama for years.

Today I ran the Windows network troubleshooter because my laptop didn't have wifi.

The troubleshooter ACTUALLY FIXED THE ISSUE!!! This is the first time I see a Windows troubleshooter actually FIX THE ISSUE.

Big ass company paying me fat stacks to remake their 3 important legacy projects (hospitals, gov, big companies) into another stack.
Will require me to no-life.

Or chill local medium sized company which creates apps to help museums, education and other wholesome shit.

Feels like i need to choose the big one because "carreer" but i am haunted by all the burn-out horror stories online.

Currently on my way to the latter for my last interview with them.

when i get notifs that people liked certain rants, i see these rants and get angry again

Why use google calendar?

Get you a micromanager!

Always the same with these f**** 🤡🤡🤡s

Congratulations, you've earned yourself a spot in the STOP category on next week's retrospective! 🖕

Be me

Have a company wide incident happen during on call

Say you're rolling back a change in a service that might have been the cause

Have someone laugh and say that change was just a new endpoint and completely unrelated

Be embarrassed

Have a senior director point out the code change that was the issue

Embarrass yourself in front of the entire company (it impacted everyone)

But hey atleast it wasn't my change

anyone else watch Stranger Things and notice they were showing HTML on the screen when it’s the 1970’s?

"Only the strongest gains the right to get the oil". Saw it at the shop yesterday.

This slogan is indeed correct — China soon will be "getting the oil" on russian land. Say bye-bye to all the land south of Ural Mountains.

Love you too Lua

Stop using anal as a variable or function name wherever I look I see anal_this and anal_that please stop. Use analyze, analyzer or whatever and not anal_insert ( ) or anal_check ()

oh boy... here we go again...

I had 19 views on my GitHub repo yesterday. Today...wtf!?!

And almost tripled my star count.

JavaScript to beginners

Microsoft teams is garbage. That is all.