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SkillsVb.net :P PHP Future: C#
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LocationGermany
Joined devRant on 10/10/2016
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Best prank I did to a office must be that one I did when I was 7 years old:
> Sat at a schoolcomputer and explored stuff
> Found alot of network printers
> Found one called "city hall front desk"
> Created a word-document with the biggest font possible
> Wrote "Dick"
> 2000 pages of the word "dick"
> Print 2000 copies
> Did the same to a kindergarten and a "rival school"
> Never got caught because I used my teachers novell account ( the password was his name)
I miss novell15 -
We were doing some temp work, and a girl we were working with had gone out to talk to her boyfriend on the phone.
1. Flip screen orientation 180 degress
2. Take screenshot
3. Set that as wallpaper and flip back
4. Hide icons, hide taskbar, move taskbar to far right edge
5. Invert mouse movement
6. Invert mouse buttons
7. Flip back 180 degrees, everything looks normal.
Sit back, relax and watch the show.
P.S. she gave up, we had to fix it.16 -
Recipe for a Great Programmer:
Ingredients:
-Books for a computer science curriculum from a top university
-Computer
-Headphones
-Internet
-Stress ball
-Pillow
-Lighter fluid
-Food
Directions:
1. Cover computer science books with lighter fluid
2. Light books on fire
3. Use flames to cook an energy-rich meal for the thousands of hours ahead
4. Pick an IDE
5. Choose a project beyond current capabilities. Good ways to push boundaries:
- Unfamiliar domain (e.g. large scale data processing, UI programming, high performance computing, games)
- Exotic programming language
- Larger in scope than any project before
6. Shut up about your IDE
7. Attempt to build
8. Stop procrastinating on Hacker News
9. Re-attempt to build
10. Squeeze stress ball and scream into pillow as necessary to keep sanity
When stuck:
- Paste stack traces into Google
- Find appropriate mailing list to get guidance
- Realize that real learning happens when you are stuck, uncomfortable, and/or frustrated
- Seek out books, classes, or other resources AFTER you have a good understanding of your deficiencies
11. Repeat #4 to #10 for at least 10 years
12. Results guaranteed! (to the same extent static types guarantee bug-free programs)
source: nathanmarz.com4 -
Seriously, why? WHHHYYYY?
US-date-format sucks, every FUCKING TIME!
The only time I really notice is when the "month" is larger than 12:
05/13/2017
"5th of Dec... oh. Fuck. Not this shit again..."
(It makes no sense. Absolutely none.)34 -
Finally the day when boss changes my position to senior developer. One of the biggest promotions I have ever had.7
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Boss: I need to demo our product but it looks smaller on my laptop.
Me: That is because you have a 1920x1080 monitor and your laptop is 1280x800
Boss: Is that something you can fix?
Me: No you will need a new laptop, but the company has a sales laptop with that resolution.
Boss: No just get the company credit card and buy me one today!
*Bosses son hears*
Bosses Son: Here take the sales laptop
Boss: Will that be quick enough
Bosses Son: It has a 8 core i7 Processor, 16GB ram and a dedicated GPU
Boss: *looks at me confused*
Me: Your demoing a web browser, that will be more then ok. But were using chrome so 16GB of ram will be pushing it.
*me and bosses son laughs*
Boss: Can we upgrade it?17 -
!rant
I work from home. Sometimes, my husband remotes into his computer during the day. When I see it, I message him jokingly that someone is "hacking his computer". Then this happens:7 -
@dfox @trogus: feature request: is there anyway to store on my profile a list of recently viewed rants? It can be for private use only.
There have been a bunch of times that I will be viewing a rant, go into safari to grab a link or find a photo, just to go back to devRant and iOS has reset the app and I can't find what that rant I was looking at. It's really frustrating.
I know getting iOS to keep the app state may be difficult but storing a list of recently viewed rants, while not the simplest, I would think is straight forward.7 -
Stupidest client ever:
I once had a client that requested me a new website, all went well and get paid.
After a month our two, he called and requested a change on basically all pages. I sent him a estimate of 2h, he approved, signed a contract and I've made the changes. He never paid me that changes. After 2 months ignoring my calls and emails I've rollback to the pre-changes website. He called me anything you can think off and that I would be sorry for done that... I was like... WTF??
- Pay me and I'll put the changes online.
He replied:
- you will be sorry. See you in court.
We went to court because of FUCKING 200€...
Court decision? The client was obligated to pay me the 200€ and all the court expenses...22