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Me: “I want the AWS instance with 2TB of RAM.”
Friend: “What on earth for!?”
Me: “I need to run the Slack client and Chrome at the same time.”9 -
During some late coding I started wondering why on earth someone beamed a headlight through my window, until I realized it was the sun...
I got a lot of stuff done though
¯\_(ツ)_/¯4 -
Apple has Air
Amazon has Fire
Google has Earth
Microsoft should really create something called Water27 -
I usually don't post such things, but the Flat Earth Society just replied to @iamdevloper on Twitter!
What a legend haha
11 -
The CEO asks God:
"God, how much time do you need to create the earth?"
God: "uh, 10 billion years I think"
CEO: " You have only 7 days. Well 6, the last one is to fix everything gone wrong after deploying"
And here we are6 -
The reason why aliens are avoiding earth:
Me : Guys, the CI/CD pipeline is ready. ci.yaml is our config file, so don't remove it as the deployments will fail.
**10 seconds later**
slack: BUILD FAILED
Me: *Looks at git commits* "Brian removed ci.yaml
Wtf BRIAN!🖕🖕🖕🖕16 -
When we finally get to Mars, all programmers on Earth will scream in pain over having to program another timezone13
-
Today I met a girl who’s super cute, down to earth, smart, uses no social media, and games. I would normally wake up soon after such dreams, but this actually happened today. I asked her out before it was too late 😊20
-
*Wants to learn a programming language*
*visits Udemy*
*It's costly af*
*Visits youtube*
*Plays learn complete java in 30 min*
*Completed*
*Visits hacker earth*
*Started solving a problem*
-- eternity later--
*Still on same problem*
*Cries in corner*
THE END18 -
Bulma framework, thanks for existing!
Lightweight, CSS only, very fucking easy to use and understand and a beautiful!
As a backend/server/security guy, front end is hell on earth for me. I understand the basics but that's it.
This fucker makes it so simple!19 -
Listening to Linkin Park while coding.
Head banging, foot tapping, just singing along in my head.
Then the boss messaged me, "should we produce some tickets?".
Apparently, I'm singing rather loudly.
Earth, swallow me up now.27 -
Dear Clients,
if you really think what I do has so little value that you won’t pay for it, why on earth would you think it was going to help your business in any way? It’s clearly not worth it. How can it have a positive impact?
- Your Unpaid Developer3 -
He's stop writing Java because he thinks Java is inelegant. He write PHP instead.
Am I still on earth? 🤔28 -
So I've been pulling my hair out as for WHY ON FUCKING EARTH MY CHANGES DON'T SHOW WHEN I RUN THE RSS FEED GENERATOR.
Oh right maybe I should upload the file first 😅🔫9 -
Who the fuck on earth named it Chef. You idiots, if I google Chef I get people wearing aprons on my browser. And what the fuck is cookbooks, cookbooks for chef returns 60 ways of making chicken. Who on earth has such naming convention for IT DevOps. Recipe, cookbooks, knife. Dafuq is wrong.10
-
This dude is definitely not from earth!! It was so good to see this!
He has over a million reputation and I'm still struggling in my hundreds and thousands 😂
10 -
What are you doing with 2KB of ram?
1969: NASA - "We just put some guys on the moon and got them back to Earth safely."
2018: Me - "I'm just struggling to run a 10 line Java program that prints the answer to an addition problem to the console."17 -
!rant
Anonymous claiming in their youtube video that NASA is about to announce the discovery of intelligent alien life.
I would be more astonished if they found intelligent life here on earth.10 -
Android Relative layout is similar to Microsoft Word.
Move the button a little bit and earth moves from it's orbit :/8 -
Oh fuck and boy Jesus, how on earth is this still a thing 😦
MD fucking 5 is not a fucking “secure” crypto algorithm.
This site has 14 million breached accounts with fucking MD5 hashes.
I think I’ve had to much internet for today.
17 -
Why on Earth are printer drivers so huge? Seriously, 1GB to print, Epson? There are entire distros of Linux that take up less than that!8
-
Sometimes I wish my girlfriend was able to write code so we could talk and share our code and thoughts.
Sometimes I thank God she finds it the most boring thing on Earth and we get to talk about other things and decompress.13 -
Annual performance peer review
Person who did review me wrote in the section “skills needed to improve”:
“He is introverted...”
Bloody hell!! What a big problem :) and how in earth you can “fix” it? And why everyone expected to be extraverted??10 -
!dev
If you ever feel like having a good laugh, just watch a flat-earthers video/live-stream.
I can't understand how something like this can even happen, it's so insanely ridiculous.
HOW THE FUCK CAN A HUMAN BEING LIVING IN 2018 BELIEVE THAT THE EARTH IS A FLAT DISC WITH A GLOBE ABOVE IT.12 -
When you get a client from real MOTHERFUCKING hell.
You just really FUCKING want to say this:
Scorched earth MOTHERFUCKER. I will massacre you. Now SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LET ME DO MY JOB.
First, take a big step back and literally, FUCK YOUR OWN FACE.
I will rain down an ungodly FUCKING firestorm upon you.
You're gonna have to call the FUCKING United Nations and get a FUCKING BINDING RESOLUTION to keep me from FUCKING destroying you.
I am talking SCORCHED EARTH MOTHERFUCKER.
I will MASSACRE you.
I WILL FUCK YOU UP!
But for your own sake you keep it at this:
Yes sir/ma'am :).7 -
Why on Earth would an API require me to provide input like this?
{"this": "{\"is\": \"not\"}", "how": "{\"json\": \"works\"}"}
😡7 -
*** IN THE FUTURE ***
@elon musk colonize mars and starts sending people to mars and keep EARTH for EU CITIZENS because mars isnt GDPR compliant4 -
!rant
I joined last night, this place its just insane, I don't even know how I managed to go through life without it... This is it, I found my place on earth; devRant...
WHOOO!!!7 -
A: man Stack Overflow is a paradise on earth, anything I need is on there, it never lets me down.
"Stack Overflow is currently offline for maintenance"
A: ......PANIC
3 -
Trying to reverse engineer an API.
Who on fucking earth thought it would be a good idea to let the response be JSON but.... THE VALUE OF THE MAIN INFORMATION THING/KEY PLAIN (UGLY AS HELL) HTML WITH EVEN GOOGLE TAGS BULLSHIT...
WHY?! THIS HURTS.
EHVIENZJVYENWBFFJSJZ 💀12 -
Flat Earthers -
The Earth is FLAT.
Most People -
The Earth is a SPHERE.
People who overthink -
The Earth is a COMPOUND SHAPE.
My Friend :
The Earth was Flat, before it was proven that the Earth was a sphere.8 -
!rant
Wooohooo! Company is sending me to Google Earth Engine Summit 2017 on my first international travel !!!!
Hope to meet some of you there 😱
Anyone gonna be there?7 -
It's pretty good deal, if you ask me !!
Gotta buy one, so that I can be online even after I'm dead, earth gets destroyed, sun gets turned into Black hole and collision of milky way and Andromeda Galaxies.
14 -
Me: ya hi, we integrated with your API and I'm receiving error x
Provider: ok we'll disable validation, plz check
Me: ya it works, what's the problem? I used a GUID for id and I'm sure it's unique, here is URL and request body
Provider: you have something wrong in your implementation. Fix it and it will work
Me: aaand what's the wrong part of my implementation?
Provider: id is not unique, fix it. *Hangs up*
I sometimes sit and wonder, how and why does this kind of people get hired, FOR FUCK SAKE YOU ARE THE PROVIDER AND YOU DONT KNOW WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG!
fucking useless ...7 -
Once again, the earth has accomplished the 30th full round since I was born.
++age;
officiallyOld = true;13 -
"Git is hugely over complicated and dangerous - what on earth is wrong with Subversion?"
"Ah. Allow me to sit you down - this could take a while..."15 -
Voyager 1 passes 17 billion miles today. The farthest man made object from the earth today and it's transmitters are still working after 43 years.
I can't even get the stuff I built last week to work right.11 -
"BlueStacks 4, 6 times faster than every phone on Earth!!!"
*wank wank*
Meanwhile, it can't even do window compositing (y u no use the fucking compositor of the fucking OS?!) or keyboard input (sends Return twice apparently). But yeah, faster than every phone on Earth. MY FUCKING ASS IS FASTER, FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT!!!
So much for a Sunday where my servers can go straight to hell for a day, and I'll just play some fucking games.. so much for that.
FUCK!!!6 -
So I can't VPN into my production servers because our fucking government decided to block them
How on earth can I work you ignorant basterds12 -
There's only a fine line between a critical issue and a dramatic client.
And by fine, I mean (the size of yo momma + the distance between earth and mars) / the teeny weeny fraction of the fucks that I give.3 -
Why I hate my job: 18 out of 21 developers are Chinese daily smokers barely speak English.
Why I love my job: We build software/hardware to predict future earthquakes and save lives and hundred million or even billions dollars in damages. And of course make China super rich by selling it.10 -
Android studio runs sooooo much better on Linux as compared to windows!!!
I just can't believe it!
My build times have been reduced by like 70% on the same laptop!
Why on earth was I even using windows all along!!5 -
I want to fight climate change because i want my snow back.
This is what matters.
Economical reasons? Nah
Being nice to earth? Nah
Doomsday reasons? Nah
I want to see snow in my city again? Yes!15 -
I'm far from being a Linux fanboy, but Linus Torvalds is such a great guy to listen to while coding. I like how down to earth and straightforward he is. The tech world needs more people like him.5
-
Sooooo.. Aws's route53 and ELB outage nuked all our environments. 503 here, 503 there, 5xx everywhere.
Just sitting and picking nose for we've got nothing else to do now.. Who on the fucking earth thought it might be a great idea to centralize the whole fucking internet into 3 companies' hands!?!
How's your day?7 -
NO! I DO NOT WANT YOUR SLUTTY USB IN MY LAPTOP'S HOLE, It's probably infected by all those computers of people installing every single program on earth.11
-
Will AI take over the world ?
Will that be cause of a bug or just machine learning ?
And finally, who is the winner and the owner of the earth?
4 -
I have a co-worker that thinks that whole world is a big conspiracy theory and the earth is flat. And this weirdo is a dev... FML2
-
(Joke || Rant)
This guy came with this joke.
Ok, funny.
Then months later you realise he pushed this tweaked prototype to master, and now this code is shipped in production and it actually prints some idiotic sentence about flat earth on console output.
Ok, idiot.
It's not my project, but sometimes I'm wondering what people have in their minds when using version control and ship crap...
-
JUST ONCE DOCUMENT YOUR FUCKING LIBRARY!
FUCKING CLOWN!
FUCKING IDIOTS!
YOU RUIN MY DAY, MAKE ME WORK 12 HOURS A DAY, TO RESOLVE SUCH BASIC FUNCTIONALITY
YOU FUCKING CLOWN!!!!!!!!!
I'D BETTER DELETE THE ENTIRE APP AND START FROM SCRATCH, WOULD BE EASIER THAN USING YOUR SCUM OF THE EARTH PIECE OF SHIT LIBRARY4 -
I just wanted to watch that video! who on EARTH still uses adobe flash player! seriously can anyone tell me?
7 -
I have survived a lot of things but javascript is hell on earth. I guess I died and went to hell.15
-
Some1: Can I call you?
Me: Any issue?
Some1: Yeah, need some clarifications.
Me: On, What?
C'mon, why on earth ppl can't provide some context before jumping into a call2 -
This tree was the loneliest tree on Earth. The next tree was 400 kilometres away.
In 1973, it was knocked down by a truck driver.
4 -
If this masterpiece came from my coworker I would smash his computer, burn his house, wipe his gene from poor mother earth. Luckily it came from my new programming student, so I find it adorable and make a post here.
4 -
this === 'rant'
> True
A million dollars for the head that creates a lethal virus that forcefully uninstalls IE and installs Firefox/Chrome and unleashes it upon planet Earth. Sorry if this sounds too harsh but guess what? FUCK IE.13 -
So by trying to make my avatar look like me as much as I can, I've came to realisation that I'm the most generic looking guy mother earth ever compiled. If that even makes any sense...
-
Blue pill: master LITERALLY every computer language on earth and be able to use them to their full potential to create LITERALLY any idea that comes to you.
Red pill: master LITERALLY every linguistic language that exists and be able to speak fluently with every human on earth
...........................
I picked the blue pill and people thought I'm weird.
14 -
I feel quite stupid asking this but what on earth is eng in English? In dutch it means scary but I don't think that that applies here 😄
(Translation services gave me the exact same word)12 -
I feel the whole universe is a programmed game and someone is playing us. Like when we're playing GTA.
Few of us are the main characters and the rest of us are just random objects to populate the earth, we don't have any rule in the story. :(
Birth is the Constructor()
Death is the Finalizer()4 -
Opened GitHub as usual today, somehow found my old repositories (created when I was a fresher). Opened them and felt why I'm still on this earth, pulled them, restructured all of them, pushed them back and now I can sleep!! 😴
-
"Your documentation doesn't specify what should be returned if there is no item matching the id, so currently I'm just gonna have it throw a 504"
Why on earth would you? What's wrong with you, you sick bastard?6 -
Bill Gates: I will always choose a lazy person to do a difficult job. Because he will find a easy way to do it.
Me: Hello, is this Microsoft. I'm the laziest person you can find on planet earth. Hire me.
2 -
Why the FUCK is he behaving to be the next Steve Jobs. And how on earth he can believe that being aggressive , shouting, fucking everyone every time and shitting around is insanely not even close to Being Steve Jobs. I want to fuck this bastard to death. Fuck you asshole.11
-
It's dead. Devrant is dead.
If anybody wandering this earth were to enjoy random people ranting, without the possibility to filter, subscribe and connect.
No notifications means this platform is walking the plank.12 -
What a developer on earth using AngularJS for form manipulation but using jQuery $.ajax to submit a form?2
-
Did you know chrome on Android has a dark theme????
**gasps**
Why didn't anybody tell me that? I missed out for so long!... Actually how long has this even been out?
Either way, good discovery!19 -
I see a lot of arguments out there over 2 space, 4 space and tab indents but I think the really problem are the people that double tab. Yes they exist and yes they are the real scum of the earth
-
Earth to Moon - 238,900 mi
Moon to Earth - 238,900 mi
New york to London - 3,459 mi
London to New york - 3,459 mi
Monday to Friday - 5
Friday to Monday - WTF!!!2 -
Earth keeps rotating
Seasons repeats
Life goes and come back
Machines in factories doing repetitive job
You sleep, you wakeup, you eat daily
... and y'all think loops are bad?2 -
!rant
Found out about JetBrains student program and asp.net unix support and now I am the happiest person on earth!😊🙂😋 -
All that hypocrites call that "beauty" competition "Miss Universe" but the media is silent about how they never let ᔮᑯ ᒐᓪᕕᐊᓐᑭ from ᐋᓪᐸ ᑲᓐᑐᕆ and ᚛ᚑᚌᚐᚋ᚜ from ᚛ᚈᚑᚋ ᚄᚉᚑᚈᚈ᚜ to even enter the competition. Speak about equality. Rename it to "Miss Earth" then you racists, smh.12
-
Don't give me Mobile First! Fuck That!
I dev on desktop, most users are on desktop, my client thinks desktop is most important, so why the hell should I put mobile first??
And doublefuck "Offline First".
Get back to earth Google!3 -
Why on gods green earth, would anybody look at a file with 20k lines, which clearly was made by something called WEBPACK and decide it's the right place to implement their changes for the next few years?!?4
-
It's 2017 and every keyboard on Earth still has vertically unaligned keys !
And if you think it's for ergonomic reason, you're wrong ! It's just something we inherited from goddamn typewriters.
It's time to let that go !
Far far away in the past.
Right next to floppy disks, MySpace and Nicolas Cage !6 -
My fucking stupid idiot neighbor is replaying the same song since morning at max volume. It's killing me! Where can i buy a machete and wipe out this moron's genes from the earth?10
-
VBA as it's still considered a programming language, but it really should be banned from the face of the Earth3
-
I have the best of the very best client on Earth.
A kind who would flat out reject with most depression reviews to our best and hardly committed work whenever an payment installment date is near. -
Running them, and having to ask dumb HR related questions that no-one gives a crap about.
I don't want someone that's sold their soul to XCorp and can rave about how it's the best place in the world to everyone they meet. I want a down to earth, decent dev.2 -
did not expect the stickers would actually arrive! you sent it all the way half of the earth. the stickers earn a deservedly special space on my laptop and phone. Kudos to you devRant!
2 -
Why on earth do sign up forms give you the option to opt OUT of email newsletters if they're going to send the bloody emails anyway?2
-
If the whole office has to listen to "gon put on mah iron shirt and chase the devil out dis earth" on max volume in between pandora commercial one more day, I'm going to hack the sound system and play Norwegian death metal. Jah!3
-
So... ranters! Where are you from? Let's try to Make a chart with geographic distribution... what do you think?106
-
There should be a developer licence so we could stop these stupid wannabes from getting into and ruining the industry with their shit work. We're so fed up maintaining these stupid codes the company previously outsourced somewhere on earth.9
-
When you go to an architecture meeting and people's statements are so abstract that they could apply to any product on the face of the earth.1
-
Why on Earth are people letting management tell them how to code? It is not their job to know how to do it. Much less to tell you how to do it.8
-
😮
*doing my work silently*
*SUDDENLY THERE'S A FOSS, PPL RUN OUT THEIR HOUSES*
*still on the laptop*
-"what? Earth quake?"
*back on the work*
PS: anyways, anyone from around Tehran sensed any quakes?6 -
Me: Could you please provide us with api key so we can add this feature?
Client's IT person: You don't need the api key to develop, their site has documentation so it's not a blocker. I will get you the api key when we are ready to go live.
Me: ... -
I'm lucky enough to be able to work with an extremely competent yet down-to-earth and generous senior engineer that it's a pita to write his review abt "area in which he can improve" - the dude already wrote 1/2 the codebase to keep the team running.1
-
Guys!! I Need help asap
My pc has become sentient and is starting to imitate me.
I'm afraid I've created sky net. I don't want to be the destroyer of earth... :'(
...
...
He's watching cat videos...1 -
!rant
Today I realized, I can play the best game on earth on my smartphone using dosbox. So I guess this will be my last post on devRant...
6 -
So how on earth is Strict MVC good for web dev. A variation of MVC works well but strict principles no!!!5
-
That moment when your server is so messed up you can only blame the devil.
So you throw away your stupid atheism, begin believing in jesus and you do an exorcism on your server.
You server still sucks, it's obviously because earth is flat and the instruction set of the CPU is meant for a round earth that never existed...3 -
Religion is ruined by people.
God's bugs are our mistakes, the platypi, and turtle penises.
Nature is so much better without us, I enjoy programming but the users are polluting, wasteful, selfish useless beings removing resources from the Earth.
Sometimes I want to become a hacker and ruin rich people's lives.10 -
So Earth just completed another revolution around the Sun and people going craaaazy all over the internet. Like calm down bruh :v3
-
God I hate JavaScript.
Why on earth would some variable * somthing.other (where somthing is undefined) result in 653957364??????17 -
There's only one place I want to spend my summer holidays:
The black hole.
I don't know about you. But earth is already boring!4 -
look at that... was trying to use shortcuts and ended up with rotated screen. laughed my ass of, why on earth windows.? :D :D :D actually couldn't undo it the same way and had to use gui :D :D
5 -
What on earth are some developers thinking. Was just browsing the Casio website, using Chrome and noticed the following message. How hard is it to display a message when actually needed, instead of all the time. Good watches, poor development :/
2 -
That awkward moment when you tell your family that you're participating in a hackintosh.
Their response: Why would you do any such thing? Hacking other people is not a good thing son.
Me: It's time to leave earth2 -
I hate being able to hear my boss in meeting with potential clients. Promising the earth then when the meeting is done tell me we have a week to make it. Not only that but then ask me what half the stuff he's sold actually is and does!?2
-
One day I had a thought. (Dangerous, I know.) What if I could build a machine that took me up into the air and decoupled my inertia from the rotation of the Earth. So I would cease to move in sync with the Earth's rotation. Then I thought this could be a way to travel around the Earth. I wanted to know how long it would take to go around the Earth. So I got the circumference of the Earth and divided it by the surface speed of the Earth. I was really excited at this point.
40075 km ÷ 1670 km/hr = 23.997 hours
Oh ... yeah ... 24 hours. I guess the math checks out.
And this is why we need dev ducks.4 -
Who the hell use any instead of a Boolean? Why on earth did I spend 10 months of my life learning a new language (Typescript) for a framework whose writer doesn't even respect their own good practices.
10 -
What if an enormous asteroid hits the entirety of earth and all our codebase, hardwork, passion, and js frameworks get wiped out?6
-
This climate crisis is slowly getting into my head guys😠. The shit bolsanaro and all other govs are doing is effecting my mojo.
I am working here and trying to do my best to deliver quality code while i must fight the feeling that ppl are betraying me (the govs). Its not my job to remind them of not fucking us over. I try to help by not becoming a criminal and getting forward with my life. Wtf is wrong with those in charge of govs?! On any project if you ignore the signs, u'll end up in refactoring hell or the project just dies. Getting out takes serious commitment.
Is everyone just gone crazy?
Here we all will get fucked, if we fail with project earth. 🤬😖👿16 -
This made my day: (Translation: In reality the earth is a star with 12 spikes and generated by this css script.
4 -
Access is just the most bull**** thing on earth. I spent 3 hours trying to find the mistake in my sql. FYI this sucker uses some special syntax for multiple joins -_-3
-
It was five years ago tomorrow when Greta predicted the end of the world. Enjoy your last day on Earth today. ;-) We are at the point of no return.
She deleted her tweet. Wonder why?
(bracing for impact)30 -
Wondering how on earth the article 50 petition went down today. Someone must have been playing with loadtest!
-
So why on earth would Postgres not spell this correctly?
```select rolname from pg_roles;```
Is it that someone could not spell rolename correctly?4 -
Went to PC Gamer's website. Got blocked by an anti-adblocker. Opened the DevTools to remove the fuck out of it. Found class names that may have been made by the drunkest vodka-fed polish dude the Earth ever carried.
8 -
Hmm.. I've noticed a trend in teams at companies: they always seem to have similar personalities, rather than similar skills.
For example, if the team leader is a pathetic, pretentious, sarcastic, frigid, lifeless loser who pretends he's happy, then he usually has a herd of equally pathetic and frigid losers following him. I notice that every time I apply to a company that has such a group, they instantly disqualify me as a member. Interesting, interesting..
The same goes for a company that has down-to-earth people like myself, then the team is usually a down-to-earth manager and down-to-earth, warm-hearted colleagues.
It all makes sense now.3 -
Turkish coffee hittin strong today damn boi - *cracks neck* “hello people of EARTH, I’m here to solve all your problems 🤌🤌”
Time to fix these websites5 -
This started off as a rant but it soon grew way too large to fit in 5000 characters, so I had to take to my Medium blog instead.
Here, y'all, have a lesson in web design from hell.
https://medium.com/@linuswillner/...2 -
World wide health care system, the data will help every human on earth, that will enable us to understand the mystique patterns of human body.
-
Wrote some unit tests to check for 404 errors that called a fake endpoint key...
Months later create that same endpoint key for unrelated reasons and spend a half hour trying to figure out WHY ON EARTH the 404 tests are all failing...
🤦♂️1 -
Regarding the never ending tabs vs spaces debate; who on earth over at GitHub thought 8 spaces was a good default value for tabs in code?4
-
https://metamag.org/2018/09/...
Does anybody know anything about this? I read it for the first time and I couldn't find any confirmation anywhere.
What the fuck is wrong with us? I don't know about Germany and UK but...
Why Italy should block such a proposal? We have no fucking tech insustry in our country, neither phones or pc or households appliances, so why the hell should we block that.
Where the fuck is the profit in this decision?5 -
Why does this happen....
I go , hey I just finished this project (app for example since they the worst culprit)
Why ... Are the next words out of the other persons mouth is, oh I had an idea for an app ....
Why do they then proceed to tell you an app that exists , or an app that's ridiculous like
You know calenders ... Yeah I do... What about a calendar that syncs to your friends one when you want to do an event .... You mean Facebook events... Yeah but for calenders 🤔😥😒
Why does the general population think one.... It's easy to build and costs nothing and two that without research they have the best idea on earth. -
Why on earth I am doing docs and sending them to the whole team, if they keep asking me how to do X and why is Y not working
YOU WILL KNOW IF YOU READ THE DOCS
GAAAAAAA2 -
Juno finally reached Jupiter, it takes 49mins for a signal to be sent to or received from Earth. IE users would know how that feels like😛
2 -
Stayed up all night to make interactive data visualizations from CFTC data and now I want to show it out.
BUT
No one is interested. Why Earth why?
Whatever, where is keyboard, and turn off the lights.
- Dark music plays. -
When you hate every fucking thing on earth and want to kill everyone on this fucked up planet.
That bug didnt fix. Fuck you.
The client needs answer now. Fuck you.
Stackoverflow user marked it as duplicate. Fuck you in particular.
Fuuuuuuuccckkkkkkkkkk every fucking asshole. -
Why on Earth would a Performance Testing application such as JMeter have such a low Java heap space by default.. i mean wouldnt it make sence to set this as high as possible for a Performance Testing tool ? 😞3
-
In 2020, the Earth slightly accelerated its spin.
For the first time in history, we need to add a *negative* leap second in our datetime systems.
...
Which means all the datetime libs need an update. I hope they anticipated this.20 -
Why on Earth would you build API in VBA ? It's such an unusable language, everything is stupid (cuz it's for beginners, right? just fuckoffplz)
Why are we building modern technologies on top of ancient stuff ? Scalable ? Manageable ? Readable ? Anything ?5 -
What is a life form?
How exactly a life started on earth? Was it brought from outer space?
Are there any life forms there out of earth?
Can a life form be based not on protein but on some other chemicals?
How exactly the very first life form of the universe was created?
Can digital things be life forms?
Can ideas and concepts be life forms? Can they exists without a medium? If so, where exactly are they stored?
Can we create living things?
Those questions are keeping me up at night16 -
Google Apps Script is probably the worst scum of the earth I’ve come across in a while.
Shit documentation and JavaScript 1.6, really?
No wonder nobody uses this crap and has proper implementation of a vast variety of applications.4 -
Red Dead Redemption 2 Day - Awesome
No managers in today - fucking win
Work from home day - Can we get anymore wins?
Remote into computer that works for everyone - TODAY IT DONT FUCKING WORK -_-
Guess its a normal ass work day today and it's raining, fuck you Earth. No one is allowed to play RDR2 until I get home2 -
Well, I just had something negative to say about the whole flat earth theory followed by me expressly saying I'm not looking for an argument
Interpretation: I just stirred the hornet's nest... Let's see what happens now7 -
Spent nearly entire weekend nights Bing watching Silicon Valley- great show and great waste of my time on earth.
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This company has more jobs than the number of people on earth. Must be a company held by the illuminati.
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Honestly, why do so many resources offer quizes to learn programming? How on earth are you supposed to learn programming by doing fucking quizes?!
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"What do you mean that I'm late? Time is relative. It just today the earth spin a little bit faster."5
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The Amazon MWS API is so utterly shite! Offers error messages sometimes then others tells you to upload your file to their file checker. Their file checker doesn’t accept XML so why say that?
Who on earth develops and documents their shit APIs?
Fuck you Amazon -
Top 5 worst illnesses, from “really really bad” to “hell on earth”:
5. Bubonic plague
4. Leukaemia
3. Multiple sclerosis
2. Dementia
1. Schizophrenia -
I cold brewed a fuckton of Yerba mate for 24 hours and had a cup this morning and now I feel like I’m going to lift off planet earth11
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Had a dream about computers on earth mostly stopping working for no apparent reason, yes, again. But this time, they still work on Mars, so we go there, at least some of us. UAC-esque, Doom 3-ish aesthetics, but in a good way, no death and no darkness. No hell plot though, we’re all fine. Both earth and mars are equally semi-livable, but in different ways. For some reason, we can’t ship new CPUs to mars, and 775 pentium considered a good CPU. We use SQL and HDDs. Elon is also there, but he’s nothing, a peasant compared to other scientists and engineers who are a part of the exodus. I had some problems with food and shelter initially, but @netikras helped me2
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For fuck's sake Microsoft, why on Earth do you announce a half-done feature? Was this an idea from marketing? Upper management? I am fairly certain that nobody who actually writes code for a living would have ever approved releasing a rushed feature to a TYPE SYSTEM.
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I'm absolutely fuming why on earth would someone try to apply exactly all rules of a theoretical concept. I hate those so called "scrum masters". We can't apply all rules of agile we're not machines. There's real life and theory.1
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If you ever stop to think:
"Why does the world experience turmoil from time to time?"
You have to stop and realize that the Earth itself is bipolar.2 -
Dan Abramov
He more or less invented React? Or at least he's made a lot of improvements to its state management functionality. He offers to have lunch with random people on Twitter. He probably knows a lot and reads a lot. He seems like a cool down-to-earth dude.4 -
What does world in Hello World refer to? If it refers to the earth then we got a big problem coming up when people start going to Mars. Programming books have to be changed etc.7
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I started questioning the intelligence of humans and my existance on earth and after all that questioning I would actually say coding made me somewhat calmer and more curious.
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Developers celebrate technology, but has technology stopped war, poverty, hunger, injustice, climate change, and the destruction of planet earth by the human beings living on this very planet?21
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Super solar power plants around the earth to powering robots and factories producing equipment to search and research more efficient energy sources across the universe and mapping the whole ma'fucka resource wide would be a nice project to spend some days at.
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Jason Bourne logic: type "run predictive algorithm" without any parameters into a terminal and it returns the locations of whatever you want. Either that function is the _best_ at predicting user input, or its variables are so hardcoded that we've just discovered the hardest material on earth2
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New game on steam, Middle-earth.
Showing absolutely no in game footage and asks you to pre-order for some bullwhip award.
Don't pre-order, please kill this type of behavior.
What is it even, rpg, rts?2 -
The man just asked how to make folders with the command line, what on earth is this 100-line nightmare json?
https://superuser.com/a/14187013 -
i want to make a website like https://neal.fun
what should i put on it?
so far i want optical illusions, css tricks & parallax scrolling, maybe a constellation drawer, tensorflow image stylizer, a surgical simulation, scroll the length of mount everest, something showing the inside of the earth, and maybe a game
any suggestions/additions?15 -
https://allo.google.com/web
classic google style, after google earth, also this works only with chrome...but but the problem is still MS and IE right? "dontbeevil"1 -
Did an assignment where we had to emulate deadlock using C and openMPI, I wanted to make a generalised resource manager process and create deadlock by locking some resources using the other processes, but my teammate said that would be too hard and instead the resource manager was hardcode with for loops for the number of transactions we were gonna make cause it was just a proof of concept.
Then my marker literally leads with, let me tell you the story of a good programmer, and a better programmer. The good programmer writes a function called destroy_earth(), but the better programmer writes a function called destroy_planet(earth) and passes in earth. I sighed so fuckin hard, I should have spoken up. -
There's no bug free program on earth, they say. Well show me a bug in my program
<?php echo"hello world!";?>
😂 😂6 -
if you're a dev, WHY on earth would you send me a blind LinkedIn invite with no message? who the !@#$ are you??
1 -
Why on Earth is React.Component.state public? This doesn't make any sense. It has no significance, but it just feels so, so stupid.2
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I can't believe it.
I was going over acceptance tests with a colleague, comparing approaches.
Had a question about how he was calling a step definition.
"Can I see your cucumber"
Lord, fucking smite me from this earth.2 -
I've just tried those streams of Java 8. And I can't understand, how on Earth I didn't try them before. They're magnificent.
Hovewer I have some doubts about using them in production. I think no one else will be able to understand what code with streams do.2 -
Larry Wall
I really like the fact that he approached perl with similar ideas like in the early days of programming.
He also seems like a down to earth guy.
It is kind of sad that perl isn't used as much nowadays. -
I want to finish my game which is a mixture of Scorched Earth and a JRPG with mecha and spells you have to program with a drag and drop interface.
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Why on earth wouldn't they give up on TFS. GET LATEST VERSION doesn't get latest version nor does it tell you that there are conflicts.
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Not my BD, just tell me why on earth someone would buy this... to show it off in the stream to his not friends?
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More stars in the universe or LEDs on earth? Screen pixels do not count.
Edit: what if we added pixels?4 -
Assuming that most of devRant members are from the US. Or they are visiting web sites hosted in that place of the Earth5
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If someday god lands on earth, How are we even gonna explain him binary? Won't he need extra tuitions for learning all these concepts?
Or maybe he's just gonna yell fuck this shit, I'm going back home!3 -
I’ve watched the Vsauce episode about rotation again the other day.
The one where Michael explains how gyroscopes were used to measure the rate of rotation of the earth.
And I realized that this is another nice proof against the flat earth crap.
And it should be easy to test, too.
Somewhat related, the cloud formations due to the coriolis effect can be seen as a proof (for the globe) as well.2 -
WordPress and it's fucking buggy themes and dashboard, fml ,only God knows why on earth I decided to use this pile of shite wordpress.if I could I would have migrated to another CMs I would have done so long time ago.Wordpress,you are wasting my life away having to manage a website with your buggy shit.6
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A question about image processing and machine learning.
I post random images of the Earth to Twitter. I would like the bot to detect if the image is bad one. How can I do this? Here is an example of bad image.
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I don't know if anyone else has had this issue, but how on earth do you clear the notifications for this app? Driving me nuts right now!
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There is only one life what you want do now only because we don't know after mixing in the mud again we will come to this earth or not. So Trust in your self work for your dreams and catch them.
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Who on earth decided, that float64 is a suitable default datatype for one-hot vectors in numpy?
That's what I deserve for relying on reasonable implicit behaviour1 -
what on earth do games like starcraft II do that even on more modern hardware their 'game modes' take awhile to initialize ?
why is the data not already organized for fast load ?11 -
Why tf are you telling me that I get to choose the format of the text that I'll need to parse later if you keep using any other freakin possible format on earth except for the one I chose 😠
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Fuck this fucking shit! How on Earth should I read and modify this fuckin only 1MB excel with this shitty phpexcel why I can not improve the speed with these formulas?!2
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Who here believe the earth is a globe?
Any idiot can see it's flat. You can manipulate data the way you want, and dedicate your life to building models around it, but it's all part of the global leftist agenda. Like vaccine, climate change, 9/11 and the moon landing9 -
At times I actually feel like making a group to conquer earth. I think it would probably be better ran than it is now anyway.5
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When is the next space shuttle leaving for mars or moon? Have got to relocate out of this world. Pls who got SpaceX booking phone number. Or elon musk addy?.😔😔 you ask why? I need a geek gf and i can't find one on planet earth..😳😳😳1
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the localhost guys must be pretty pumped going live. Like going to the galaxies from the earth. All the space adventure fighting the viruses, getting beaten by them. woooohoooo!
nostalgic. almost. -
lost in an alien world ... he calls for help:
"eden project can you hear me"
pahaahahahah calling project-management for help has never helped anyone bro
[scene from: Earth 2]
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Why on earth can one perform calculations on pointers in c++? I can think of a dozen ways this could go wrong, but none where this is useful.
Following example:
int t = 1234;
int tt = 5555;
int* p = &t;
int* pp = *(p + 1):
Here pp will give me 5555...5 -
Let's play find Waldo: devRant © 2021
Enjoy and please update it once earth v2024 rolls out to stable.1 -
Probably only one on earth but when I see or write "asbestos" I'm used to think of it like AsbestOS. :I
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as my first rant here I thought i'd start with one of my favorite relevant quotes:
"If only it weren't for the people, the goddamned people, always getting tangled up in the machinery. If it weren't for them, earth would be an engineer's paradise."
-Kurt Vonnegut, "Player Piano"1 -
Why on earth does the Bit Bucket user search when assigning an issue bring up every bloddy user until you typed their name fully.
Surely, team mates should show first.
Maybe JiRA is better?2 -
I hate it when implementation takes less time than business analysis. If you cannot refine requirements after years of discussions, make Earth a favour and shoot yourselves. Do not force me to implement something that you will probably never use.
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After about two days of trying to crack LaTeX, I'm starting to think it was made for masochists, not programmers...why on earth would any sane mind come up with such a gooseshit???2
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What is gonna happen in 8/16, 2048?
(August 16th, 2048)
People are always making dumb conspiracy predictions. Let's make one, like that's the date when AI relinquishes control over the economy to leave earth or something.7
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