I don’t disagree 🤷🏻‍♂️

Code review titles by year:

1990 - your code is using to much memory
1995 - your code is not running on window 95
2000 - your code is slow
2003 - your code don't have tests
2005 - your code is not 64 bit
2009 - your code is not using mvc patters
2010 - your code is not horizontal scalable
2011 - your code should be written in js
2015 - your code is not mobile ready
2020 - your code is racist

Think in the Design of iPhone 11 John Ive was absent; this was Tom (Cook)'s idea and inspiration 😆😆😆😆

Toilets and race conditions!

A co-worker asked me what issues multi-threading and shared memory can have. So I explained him that stuff with the lock. He wasn't quite sure whether he got it.

Me: imagine you go to the toilet. You check whether there's enough toilet paper in the stall, and it is. BUT now someone else comes in, does business and uses up all paper. CPUs can do shit very fast, can't they? Yeah and now you're sitting on the bowl, and BAMM out of paper. This wouldn't have happened if you had locked the stall, right?

Him: yeah. And with a single thread?

Me: well if you're alone at home in your appartment, there's no reason to lock the door because there's nobody to interfere.

Him: ah, I see. And if I have two threads, but no shared memory, then it is as if my wife and me are at home with each a toilet of our own, then we don't need to lock either.

Me: exactly!

Recently had an interview with a company. At some point an SELinux question came up and while I didn't provide the best answer ever (I'm hardly familiar with SELinux and mentioned that as well beforehand so they knew), it was technically correct and the reaction of the interviewers was funny.

TI (technical interviewer): say your php script isn't executed and after a while you find out that SELinux is blocking php script execution, how can you fix that?
Me: setenforce 0...? (essentially disabling SELinux at all)
TI: disabling it entirely for getting php execution to work?! That doesn't sound like a good solu...
HRI (HR (non technical) interviewer, also present): *turns to TI* - but, would it solve the problem?
TI: 😐 well, yes, but... That's a bad thing to do so I wouldn't count is corre..
HRI: *still aiming towards TI* but you simply asked him for a way to solve the php execution issue, would his answer work? Regardless of whether it's the best or worst solution, would it be a solution which works?
TI: well... yes...
HRI: then he answered correctly I'd say, next!

(yes, I'm aware that my answer wasn't good as for security at all but it would have solved that problem which is what was asked)

We all do this!! 😅

Today I discovered by myself that...

...in a shell...

...when entering a password (e.g. ssh)...

...and you make a typo... 🤦‍♂️

...you don't need to smack that backspace key like a maniac! You can just use the clear line shortcut: control+U (^U). This clears all input to the left of your cursor and this also works for passwords.

Quite true about those EA basterds.

Every fds ever

My thoughts on programming:

As a child:
It is 100% magic

As a developer:
It is 65% if/else statements, 34% iterating an array, 1% actual amazing and unique code

(•_•)
<) )╯i
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> got
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> promoted
/ \

Coworker wrote a nice package and put it on Github, to share with other departments.

I link his package on our company Slack, mentioning a team, with text "What do you think of this one? Is it usable for you guys?"

Next thing I know I have to explain to an executive why I'm "posting pictures of seductive cartoon girls in company chat with disrespectful commentary"

It linked the Github profile picture of the developer in Slack. A fully clothed anime girl, nothing particularly lewd about it.

But I like stabbing back a bit, and confusing the fuck out of people in suits:

"Hate to say it, but a good majority of all the code the company runs on, is written by people known as weebs, who use their so called waifus as their GitHub profile picture. It is very common for open source Javascript packages, but since we recruited 50 extra devs it now also happens internally. It's not my thing either sir, but I'm afraid we have to embrace it... "

"But what about our female devs? What about Joanna, she's in your team? We have to think of diversity! Our investors are really in to diversity, we can't have a bro culture!"

"Sir, with all due respect, we have super diverse teams without even trying. The problem is... they're all millennials. They grew up on weird memes... and are probably ten steps further in embracing diversity compared to the rest of the company."

"Also, Joanna is the one who drew this particular picture. She's charging a €15 commission for profile pictures... Do you want one of your fursona, sir?"

"What is that?"

"Uh... nevermind. Let's... let's not go there"

We had recently a thread asking about our internet speeds, this seems relevant to most of what I've read in the comments so far.

note: Not the worst dev I've interviewed but worst I've worked with.
A guy who worked in my company before me "HARDCODED" the entire calendar for next 10 years starting 2016 in dictionaries and arrays in Python for a project.

Meeting with client.

Me: our solution does not require a central server, any computer (windows, Mac or Linux) on which you install our software can act both as a client and a server

Client: no we need to have all our data on our server

Me: sure, you can install our software on any computer

Client: no, we need it on our server

Me: ok then, we can make the needed changes to install our software on your server, it will cost an additional fee though

Client: very good then

IMAGINE USING WINDOWS CE IN 2019

Fuck. Medium.
Fuck all the articles on it too.

Do you seriously think I am so fucking dumb that I cannot keep my attention on a paragraph of text without at least one image for five seconds straight?
Three quarters of your shitty fucking article are images. They don't even relate to a damn thing in the article. It's just a fucking stream of random image subtitles.

It's just as bad as people randomly mashing pictures they found via Google search into their Power Point presentation because they actually have no content, breaking all copyright laws in the process, so they can stretch their mindless bullshit as long as humanly possible.

FUCK. YOU.

Parents asking me to do stuff. (I work remotely at home)

Doing my homework.... I hope my professor appreciates the humor....

YES YES YES

It says here https://lingolex.com/ants.htm that ant brain has 250000 brain cells, so 40000 ants add up to one human.
The biggest unitary colony found so far has something over 300 millions of ants. They also form federations also called megacolonies and those spread across large areas and are estimated over a billion.
They have insect version of agriculture and they can decide what is the purpose of an ant when it's egg is laid (also depends on time of the year). They don't fight other ants with the same smell, which pretty much carries down.
What are they thinking about all day? Are they like "let's lay three more billions and then take over" or is it more like "how does my butt smell to you? let's eat that leaf" Because if they have hive mind as they say then they add up to some serious intelligence :-|
>.>
<.<
¯\(0_o)/¯

Shitty meme time

Do you guys use PUT,DELETE,UPDATE http requests? I use like GET and POST. Keep me updated veterans!

DISCLAIMER: UNPOPULAR OPINION

I'm tired of the Linux community, they effectively discourage me of taking part in any discussion online

I'm currently making Windows-only soft, some game stuff, some legacy DirectX stuff you got it.

Everytime I go online, this shitty pattern happens, when I stumble upon a problem in project I don't know how to fix and I ask for help
These are responses
- HA, HA, WINDOWS BAD, HA, HA, GET REAL SYSTEM
- In Linux, we can do X too. I mean it has 4x less functionality and way shittier UX and is even harder to implement but it can probably work on too Linux, so it's better, yes, just move to Linux
- btw you didn't like Linux before? Try this distro man, it's better <links random distro>

Is there anything valuable in the Linux community? I feel like these people don't like Linux anyway, they just hate Windows. Every opinion, tip is always opinion based. Anyone who works on internals knows how much better and how well thought is Windows kernel compared to Linux kernel. Also, if someone unironically uses Linux distro on desktop PC then he's a masochist because desktop Linux is dieing. So many distros ceased work only this year.

Is it a good tool for servers and docker containers? I don't have my head stuck up my ass to admit that yes, it's much better than Windows here.

This community got me stressed right now, I fear that when I go to bathroom or open my microwave there's gonna be a Linux distro recommendation there

😠😡😠😴

Can't believe this question haven't got -826 votes... "Dude"...

Social media censorship is such a fucked up shithole of bullshit.

Ig thot models post their asses and tits on there about twice a week and it's not a big problem at all. Just turn a blind eye to that.

But God forbid you post something that is vaguely mean or anything political that isn't center to left, and that bitch is getting deleted for bullying or harassment.

I commented on this post and basically just said "your mom sounds like a bitch" but that got deleted for harassment. Is that really what harassment is? Well holy fuck I harass my friends like a few dozen times a day so I should probably get arrested.

Gotta love having speech censored under the umbrella of "pReVeNtiNg BuLlYiNg".

colleague asking for your attention (even when you have headphones on your ears) just to tell you some toxic joke or show you some toxic post on instagram then expect you to laugh! (especially when he is one of the company's shareholders) 😫

Life of a front end dev😬😬

Tfw nobody but your mom remembers your birthday. I just became 20 but holy shit I didn't think I would experience the world of an adult this quick

Name a more iconic duo. I will wait.
Job interview | "We will contact you"