It's all about how fancy you fail

Ah, just followed a 35-line tutorial to create a window with a line in it using xlib.

Time to put "Professional Linux Graphical Developer" in the olde resume

> had an exam with a friend

> we both go to comp sci college

> had to write a fucked up algorithm in matlab

> he hates matlab

> he completes the task

> the variable that outputs the result is called holocaust

> he gets sent to dean

> expelled

lol.

Client: This new feature is not working on Internet Explorer.
Me: Do you have enough oxygen in the cave you are living in?

I sold my first app today. I’m 70 cents richer now. ;)

This made me laugh

Contributor badge 👍

Imagine all the variables...

He is going places.

You'll need little knowledge of porn and meme to understand this ...

*at work* (fictional names)

Kevin (linux support engineer): Bob, could you come for a second to take a look at something?
Bob (senior linux engineer): *tiny voice from a corner behind a desk* bob is not available right now. Please try again later.
Kevin: Bob, please, just for a second!
Bob: bob is not available right now, please try again later.
Kevin: Boooooooooooooob, come heeeeereeeee
Bob: as said before, bob is not available right now, try again later.
Kevin: but booooooob, come oooooon.
Bob: it seems that you might have a hearing problem since bob is still not available.
Kevin: but booooohooooob, come heeeeeeeeeeereee
Bob: it seems like the person on the other side of this line might be retarded. Bob is not available right now.
Kevin: But boooohooooohooooooob come oooohooohooon, just for a seeehehecond *starts fake sobbing"
Bob: Bob is getting real tired of your shit. Leave bob alone.

😆

Me: intern in XYZ company
Boss: boss of XYZ

Boss: Why are you taking so much time in developing a simple webpage.
Me: *explains because you asked for so much bullshit to include**
Boss: I can develop it in half an hour.
Me: *-_-*
Boss: I developed a website in PowerPoint when I was intern.
Me: In PowerPoint? How?... Really..?
Boss: Ya, that's the type of skills I have. You're so lazy, you take so much time to make a simple webpage.
Me: -_-

This was during the first day of my first real dev job, straight out of college. I didn’t have have much experience with version control since I did mostly solo projects in college, and I wasn’t exposed to SVN or Git in school at all.

One of the senior devs was going to give me and another new guy a brief overview of the codebase. He sets us up with the GitHub repo for the codebase and tells us to clone the codebase locally. I didn’t really know what this meant but I felt kind of embarrassed to ask, so I just clicked “download as zip” on The GitHub repo.

After a minute he saw what I had done and was like “yeah, that’s not what you want to do” and showed me how to clone it. I was kind of embarrassed but I learned Git pretty quickly after that.

I don’t really have a moral to this story except that “no question is a stupid one” is much easier said than done for many people, and it can be embarrassing to ask certain questions sometimes.

Enough is enough. This has happened for the last time! >:(

Soo apt.

How that can happen?

If you hold a Unix shell up to your ear you can hear the C.

Source:- Reddit

Shit just got real

Me: *Watching a movie*

Main Character: "Oh no, we have to hack the CIA to figure out how this machine works! Hacker girl, do the stuff"

Hacker Girl: "Consider it done!"

Hacker Girl: *Opens Linux bash*

Hacker Girl: *types 'mkdir Hack_CIA'

Hacker Girl: "They have two-factor authentication in place, this is going to be a hard one."

Hacker Girl: *Types 'cd Hack_CIA'*

Hacker Girl: "I'm in!"

Me: "..."

Friend: "Wow, so well done, so realistic!"

Me: *Dies*

I’ve finally gotten a desktop for work. So I don’t have to use my own mbp.

I think I’ve got enough screens, for now.
What annoys me is that none of them are same type, size or brightness

Me: Hey Google, open devrant
Google: Results for dev brand

Me: open devrant
Google: Results for dev hand

Me: No! open "dev" "rant"
Google: Results of some dude named Dev Randhawa

Me: Dammit open devrant
Google: Dewa rent? Electricity bill paying sites of some town called dewa.

Me: Open d.e.v.r.a.n.t
Google: Opens Google play song from Kevin Durant.

Me: gives up and listens to Kevin Durant sing some shit about LeBron James.

Wrote a script that calms the extreme use of exclamation/question marks and capslocked rants, do have to say, it makes it much easier to read many of the rants, it also adds small stats at the bottom of the rant

may sound like it takes the "fun" out of those rants, but it only triggers if the capslock is more than the lowercased letters

wish the devrant webapp was accessible from mobile, to use all them scripts on mobile too

Oh shit

Fucking trueee

My linkedin: "please dont contact me about javascript work"

Every recruiter on linkedin: "hold my beer"

I don't even have friends for god's sake! 😂😂😂

FIRE 🔥🔥🔥🔥🔥

Random guy : Well I'm not tracked on the internet, I use private tabs.
Me : Well, I'm not sleeping with your mom, I use condoms