javascript developers be like

Wife: commit, and come to bed..
Me:
> git commit -m "wife wants me to go to bed"
> git push origin master -f

........

Everytime

TODO Statement in real life :D

I just finished my thesis defense, one of the committee members obliterated me with incredibly difficult questions but it was so much fun to respond to this 40min smackdown after presenting all my work in 50 minutes. The battle has been won ladies and gentlemen, I am incredibly happy.

Who here uses Firefox as their Android browser?

Random, funny :)

Can we do that??? 😶

Today I learned Slovakia is in fact a version control system, not country.

Things you find on Wikipedia these days.. 🤔

LoL relatable

~During app demo to our client~

- And when you click here the request will be submitted, the admin will be notified.
*App crashes*
- And of course the app will close itself since it's the end of the process.
- Client: That's good
- Me: ⊙﹏⊙

Shared screen with a client over Skype. Showed them in Postman that their API wasn't working as expected. It was expecting a json. Instead it was giving error code 400 instead of 200.
Message :
"Error: No error. All OK"

I'll never forget the words of the client:

"Don't use all this fancy software, you don't know how to call APIs, open Internet Explorer or chrome and paste it in the bar. You'll see All OK, means all is okay."

*insert you dense mf meme here*

Why😂😂😂😂

My type of developer

Somewhat related to programming....

TLDR : I left a company which doesn't understand the concept of email id and passwords.

Me (trying to login to the alumni website) *no register user option*

Customer support - you've to click on forgot password to create an account.
Me - Wonderful

*clicks on reset password*
*enters employee id, name, email, father's name, DOB, date of joining , date of leaving, current city because apparently if I just enter my employee id it is as if they never knew me. Sigh*
*your password will be sent to your email id*

Me - okay. *waits for two weeks because I assumed someone will manually go and create my account and email me, considering the state of system. *

After two weeks,

Me - I still haven't received my password on email after I created my account. Can you please check?

After one week,

Customer support - you need to click on forget password if you forgot your password.

Me - *inventing new curse words* I have not forgot my password, I never received it in the first place!

After one week,
Customer support - yes you'll receive your password on your email id.

Me - *runs out of curse words* seriously dude?
* proceeds to reset password*
System - your password has been reset. Your new password will be sent to your email id. *apparently anyone can reset passwords if you have the employee id, which is an integer*

After a week

Me - Am I going to ever receive the password? I've tried generating passwords, resetting my password. I never get my passwords. What should I do!!

Customer support - yes you need to click on Forgot password.

Me - are you fucking kidding me!!!
You fuckers need to be fired and replaced by a FAQ page which has no question and just a single answer, because a peanut has higher IQ than you. For any questions you may have, just reset password. Goddammit idiots!
Also, which email id are you sending my passwords to?

Customer support - myname@oldcompany.com

Me - you do realize that this is the alumni website for the company. Alumni means ex members.
Being ex members, you can assume we don't have access to our company email ids obviously?

Customer support - yes.

Me - how am I supposed to get the password using my old email id then?

Customer support - you need to click on forgot password option.

I think I should probably move to the Himalayas for my anger management issues. Plus it'll be probably easier to throw idiots off a mountain.

I feel attacked...

Haha... That's so true

TLDR: programming helped with my math weakness

I've always been bad at math. I always failed my math quizzes, and to be honest the only thing that I remember from that time was that I hated it, I didn't want anything to do with it, to hell with functions and formulas and all of that garbage.

Fast forward a couple of years. I just started my masters degree in machine learning and I'm sort of inclined to applications of deep learning in signal processing. Currently I'm writing a fourier transform in raw python and I've never had more fun. I feel like programming has helped me a lot with math, being able to see how each component behaves when you write a function helps a lot! Being able to plot things helps a lot! Not having to imagine mathematical functions as esoteric mystical wonders but being able to split them up into small components and seeing what you're doing wrong HELPS. A. LOT.

Just felt like sharing. I feel like programming has made me a generally smarter person, in regards to how I approach problems and think about stuff.

Release.....

Boss 1: You have such a dedicated team of workers, how do you make them all come in time?
Boss 2: Its simple, 30 employees, 20 parking spaces.

Overheard from the room next to mine:
Person 1: My computer is frozen ..
Person 2 (Not a native English speaker): Did you try to shut down and shut up ?

Receiving a bug report from the manual tester “numeric input does not work”.

He accidentally disabled Num Lock on his keyboard.

New to devRant. Didn't realise it existed before. What got me here - docker!

Customer: IT is completely useless! I’m getting PORN ADS on my work computer!? This is ridiculous!!!

Friend: Oh that’s not good, perhaps your computer has a virus of some sort let me take a look!

Friend takes a look and sees that the porn ads were all provided by google ad service, they weren’t related to a virus.

Friend: so, you don’t have a virus, but so that you know google gathers metrics on the sites you visit so that it can target ads at you better. Looks like that’s what’s happening here.

Customer: .............

Please contact your optician. Hahahahaha

- Heey, he's using Arch !!
- See? nobody cares

No. More. Writing. Code. On. A. Fucking. Piece. Of. Paper.

 (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻

Jetbrains should make an IDE for LaTeX, just sayin.