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Filling a form :
Normal Person
Name: Jim Jennings
Comment: Nice Post
Developer
Name: asfsafsadsa
Comment: asfsafsadsa dsad sdfs fa41 -
Friend: So, you can program
Me: Yeah
Friend: nice, can you hack a Facebook profile?
Every.
Fucking.
Times.10 -
Useless notification..
Working on a Job Portal Application, i made notification functionality.
At least i caught this one before production
5 -
Since I started reading devRant the productivity of our team dropped a 20%(we are 3 people). Yesterday one of my teammates asked me what was going on and I showed him devRant.
I don’t think we will survive next split.1 -
Today is finally the day of my hackathon, have been working with my team for about a month on a personal assistant already. I think we may stand a chance to get in the finals this year, unlike last year, when we started working only on the day of the hackathon.
3 -
When everything has been abstracted..
While I think it's encouraging to newcomers into the field of programming they should always strive to delve into the abstracted details.. The amount of complexity that we deal with 'infinite'.
4 -
Sorry just had to cuz we used to see so much of this type of meme... http://commitstrip.com/en/2018/...
4 -
Me: *running my first Java program*
Java: Error: illegal character
Me: *scared* Am I going to Java jail or what?3 -
How to become a hacker😎
1.Go to the store get a black hoodie, wear it and go infront of the PC.
2.Turn on the PC with WINDOWS😂
3.Change cmd font colour to green.
4.Type the following code in cmd.
ping 192.168.1.1 -c 9999999
5.OK now do that in again and again in 2-3 terminals.Now your desktop is full with black and green😋.
5.Take some pics of it and upload stories😍.
6.OK now your a HACKER😎9 -
Me : "Jarvis, build me shit...."
Jarvis : "Ok sir, assimilating....your program would be ready in approximately 5 minutes"5 -
I seriously feel like this should be a joke/meme.
What you see in the picture is a database table.
This guy's now running around with a degree in something related to web development.
6 -
English teacher :prepare a recipe of your favorite meal
Me :yeah sure
Title :how to prepare md5 seasoned with salt.
Procedure :
$salt="*+3256_$@";
$userpass="12345aeiou";
$md5hash=md5($userpass.$salt);
echo $md5hash;3 -
[God creating manager]
God: Take a blood sucking Dracula
Angel: okay
God: Wrap in a human costume
Angel: wait, is that legal?
God: Now make it dumb
Angel: -_-
God: Throw it between intelligent people
Angel: Is everything alright at your home?8 -
Doesn’t matter how much experience you have, there’s always a new rake to smack you in the face. 🤣
Found post by programmer.me on Instagram.
1 -
This may or may not be an old meme but this is the first time i ever saw it and all i can say is
THANK YOU to the original creator, whoever he or she might be!
I had this insecurity for a long time as i always portrayed myself as more of a thinker than coder. I have to go over everythibg before i got to write even one single line of code, and for this reason i tought i might not be made out to be a programmer after all :s
It's truly reassuring to hear that your short comings are actually quite normal 😥
Sorry for the long post on a joke tagged post 😁
4 -
tar -zvcf folder just gave me the error message:
"tar: Cowardly refusing to create an empty archive"2 -
-bestfriEND
-boyfriEND
-girlfriEND
-friEND
Only: “
int count = 1;
while (count < 2) {
count—;
cout << count;
}”
Has no END.3 -
"Hey cool this very trustworthy IQ Test Game I found on the PlayStore says I have an IQ of 120"
*2 hours later*
14 -
Damnit...
I'm kind of a perfectionist, which is one of the reasons why I don't post here very often.
I think that my posts have to be the most hilarious or creative ones to even be bothered to be read by anyone.
Now.. I'm kind of not sober, so I'll just write some idéas, jokes and rants in notes on my iPad.. Sleep, and get drunk again tomorrow and maybe post them...
Or maybe just delete this post and be ashamed tomorrow?
I at least posted this under the "Joke/Meme" tag so that people won't be offended, hopefully, by this "none-rant".5 -
Recently bought some programmer T-shirts
made me popular, now I am known as the guy with the cool shirts.one of them has this on it:
2b || !2b ? "2b" : "!2b"
my fav joke now
I use these shirts to make friends and it actually works, you should also try ;)12 -
when you see devs with age <= 16 who look experienced than you and you say to yourself
"Where the fuck have I spent my early life"3 -
Came across this gem. Thought more people ought to see it. 😂 Guess no one in that repo had a sense of humor.
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I was done arguing with people about undefined and implementation defined behaviors and what the standard is. I had to make this after someone told "which standard book are you talking about? Which university teaches it?"
3 -
Mind of a programmer in an Interview be like:-
Interviewer:- What's your name?
Programmer:- My name is Alice. (In mind printf("my name is %s ",name);)
Interviewer:- Where are you from?
Programmer:- India. (In mind location = &India;)16 -
Thanks for messing up my home directory!!!
Edit: Tell me when you have to scroll 2x your display height
13 -
Let's split joke and meme into two different categories so that we can have shitty memes under one tag and (hopefully OC) jokes in the other. Then we could filter out low effort memes and still get the occasion joke. We need jokes.3
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I went out partying with couple of friends last night, it was nice ...
So I met this girl, she was nice and beautiful, out going basically we were getting each other's vibes and the mood was right ... We had a drink together and everything was cool until I learned her last name ...🤣
I couldn't help it I cracked up it was so intense ...
her last name was "chrooto"
I know that I have ruined my chances with her, but I don't think I could've been able to hold it6 -
Between programmers:
F: "Hey, where is John?"
S: "He's at home, he has a Terminal disease"
P.S. On Italian sounds probably better, I hope you'll have a laugh ;)3 -
Funny how everything that seems like an almost general truth about the computer users is conditioned only but the phrase "..excepting Linux users" 🤔
No one randomly recommands operating systems ... excepting Linux users!
No one needs to know how to do <complicated hilly-billy technology> in order to use <generic simple software>!
It seems that we (the Linux users) are all rebels without a cause😅2 -
Other people in 2019:
Realtime image classification!
Me in 2019:
22075ms to find all occurrences of a string of the screen2 -
Needing to teach myself M$ InfoPath because of legacy business code. What better way to learn than getting the feet a little wet first!
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Hey Lemonade is looking for 10x engineers! Please apply only if you write code that has at least 7 layers of abstraction. Thanks!
🤣
https://makers.lemonade.com/recipe/...8 -
Sartre once said "Hell is other people" .
Obviously he did not use public transportation very often.1 -
How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb? Not a single one, its a hardware problem!1
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I am an amazing programmer, but without the required skills
My git commit history is pristine, but without the commits4 -
A developer can never stay happy ....😪😪...
there is always a fcking bug to make him listen to bad shits instead of getting appreciation for his hardwork..2 -
brute force has indeed solved more problems on earth than AI ever will....
That's because the number is still counting just look at copy paste code from stackoverflow 😂😂😑
11 -
We have all run the same code although it didn't work the first time. And it never worked the second.😂😂
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Coding the board software for a car while you drive it at 120 kmph can be called agile programming?1
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Earning your place in the CAB meetings with all the senior engineers feels like your balls are always on the table and them with baseball bats.
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Write a function that shows off a cool stuff about your favorite programming language
Me:
function coolstuff(){
echo "I can always google and reffer everything and stack overflow got my back";
}3 -
If you're feeling lonely and want a lot of responses in any dev forum, just talk shit about a widely used programming language.2
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Me: This ...
Friend: Is not working.
Me: How come it not work?
Friend: You are such a ...
Me: Waste of time. I know.
Friend: Forty minutes is all I'll need to debug this program.
Me: Seconds, Can u do that in Forty seconds.
Friend: Of course not. Why would I?
Me: An idiot teacher wants me to upload it right now.
Friend: Idiot, Is that what u call a teacher.
Please read the first letter of every conversation.11 -
In Unix everything does one thing and does it well. Except emacs which does everything really badly1
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Lately in school...
I was on devRant and saw that someone posted he had a table drop during prod. And at that time I didn't know what a table drop was so I assumed he dropped his laptop. Then a friend of mine corrected me. Facepalm of my life. -
Me when I finally find the bug which me my app work in wrong way:
What the F*******, did I really write this? -
I like this old clip. When somthing is not working...this catchy text make me feel bettet.
https://youtu.be/Eq3CuMDXaPs
Not as catchy but very funny
https://youtu.be/RnqAXuLZlaE
Anyone know any good clips? -
Can we just auto down doot all joke posts? All possible programming jokes already have been said and we already reached all combinations of them.1
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!rant
Quote from my teacher: "It can only be divine design that a mans vision and a womans beauty decline at the same rate"1
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