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*Now that's what I call a Hacker*
MOTHER OF ALL AUTOMATIONS
This seems a long post. but you will definitely +1 the post after reading this.
xxx: OK, so, our build engineer has left for another company. The dude was literally living inside the terminal. You know, that type of a guy who loves Vim, creates diagrams in Dot and writes wiki-posts in Markdown... If something - anything - requires more than 90 seconds of his time, he writes a script to automate that.
xxx: So we're sitting here, looking through his, uhm, "legacy"
xxx: You're gonna love this
xxx: smack-my-bitch-up.sh - sends a text message "late at work" to his wife (apparently). Automatically picks reasons from an array of strings, randomly. Runs inside a cron-job. The job fires if there are active SSH-sessions on the server after 9pm with his login.
xxx: kumar-asshole.sh - scans the inbox for emails from "Kumar" (a DBA at our clients). Looks for keywords like "help", "trouble", "sorry" etc. If keywords are found - the script SSHes into the clients server and rolls back the staging database to the latest backup. Then sends a reply "no worries mate, be careful next time".
xxx: hangover.sh - another cron-job that is set to specific dates. Sends automated emails like "not feeling well/gonna work from home" etc. Adds a random "reason" from another predefined array of strings. Fires if there are no interactive sessions on the server at 8:45am.
xxx: (and the oscar goes to) fuckingcoffee.sh - this one waits exactly 17 seconds (!), then opens an SSH session to our coffee-machine (we had no frikin idea the coffee machine is on the network, runs linux and has SSHD up and running) and sends some weird gibberish to it. Looks binary. Turns out this thing starts brewing a mid-sized half-caf latte and waits another 24 (!) seconds before pouring it into a cup. The timing is exactly how long it takes to walk to the machine from the dudes desk.
xxx: holy sh*t I'm keeping those
The bash scripts weren't bogus, you can find his scripts on the this github URL:
0. Plan before you code. Document everything. You won't remember either your idea or those clever implementations next week (or next month, or next year...).
1. Don't hack your way through, unless that's what you intend to do. Name your variables, functions etc. neatly: autocomplete exists!
Protip: Sometimes you want to check a quick language feature or a piece of code from one of your modules. Resist the urge to quickly hack in the test into your actual project. Maintain a separate file where you can quickly type in and check what you're looking for without hacking on your project (For example, in Python, you can open a new terminal or IDLE window for those quick tests).
2. Keep a quiet environment where you can focus. Recommend listening to something while coding (my latest fad is on asoftmurmur.com). Don't let anything distract you and throw your contextual awareness out of whack.
3. Rubber ducks work. Really. Talking out a complex piece of logic, or that regex or SQL query aids your mind greatly in grasping the concept and clearing the idea. Bounce off code and ideas with a friend or colleague to catch errors and oversights faster. Read more here: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
4. Since everyone else is saying this (and because it merits saying), USE VERSION CONTROL. Singular most important thing to software development aside from planning and documenting.
5. Remember to flout all of the above once in a while and just make a mess of a project where you have fun throwing everything around all over the place. You'll make mistakes that you never thought were possible by someone of your caliber :) That's how you learn.
Have fun, keep learning!4
No, I wont help you solve your stupid problem. If you are not able to read the wiki or the man pages - Arch linux is not for you.
You have only proven that you are stupid enough to listen to other people who likes to brag how good the are, but actually do not know shit.20
Co-worker: "Should we keep this server up and running?"
C: "Do we have any other uses for it than the dedicated wiki?"
M: "Not really, and maybe it's time to move to the centralised platform Corporate™ introduced. Have we checked if anyone is using the server?"
C: "Good point, let me see…"
C: "… oh it's been down for last two weeks since the power outage."
M: "I think that answers the question. Let's leave it like this for a month more and if no one complains we can announce it dead"3
"Arch Linux is actually not that difficult".
I ssh'ed into my home server yesterday.
I was greeted by a message from an ext3 disk about needing fsck. Fine, "I haven't been in here for a while, might as well do some maintenance". fsck /dev/sda6, let's go!
This nicely "repaired" the sshd service (i.e. cleared the sectors), I cursed at myself for pressing enter at "repair (y)" right before the connection broke.
So I connected a display and keyboard... ok so let's just pacman -Sy sshd or whatever. We can do this! Just check the wiki, shouldn't be that hard!
Wait... pacman has not run since 2010? WAIT IT'S ACTUAL UPTIME IS 9 YEARS??? I guess we know why I'm a DB admin and not devops...
Hmm all the mirrors give timeouts? Oh. The i686 processor architecture isn't even supported anymore...?
4 hours, 11 glasses of cognac, 73 Arch32 wiki/forum pages, 2 attempts at compiling glibc, and 4 kernel panics later: "I think I'll buy a new server".22
While I'm in pause time with my colleagues and reading on wiki how, the boss comes to me and asks:
Boss: what are you reading?
Me: how to Quit Your Job Graciously 😊
The next day the boss offered me a +€0,50 p/hour.3
Trying to learn X on wiki. Immediatelly learn that you suck at everything and need to research more about Y, Z to understand the basic meaning of X.
And that goes on recursivelly.6
WHAT THE FUCK, AVAST!
You can't just fucking unbind chrome from my taskbar and pin your fucking trash excuse of a browser.
Reading the fucking Wikipedia article:
"It is based on Chromium, but was subsequently found to contain a serious security flaw not present in Chromium itself."
ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!40
I read somewhere that you can go to Adolf Hitler Wikipedia page from any other wiki page within 5 clicks!
Here's what I tried.
List of Programming Languages -> Lisp -> Massachusetts Institute of Technology -> World War II -> Adolf Hitler8
I started coding in 1994 making .BAT menus for my DOS games. Used HELP.EXE to find commands I could use. Then I figured out how to modify and run GORILLA.BAS (using Q-Basic). Man, when I realized that all BASIC commands were in the OS documentation as well, that was the Red Pill! Just started to copy commands and blocks from the Gorillas game into a new program, read the doc, modify, run and learn. Btw, the first BASIC command I played with was "PLAY" (for music).
At that time I was 10 and there was no Stackoverflow, no Youtube, no tutorials, no Google... no easy path to follow down the rabbit hole.
TIL that Wikipedia has IAR (Ignore All Rules), which says "If a rule prevents you from improving or maintaining Wikipedia, ignore it."
I've found sites like Udemy/Khanacademy/Codecademy/Brilliant/Edx to be very useful — possibly more useful than expensive education.
But they still need:
1. Better correction/update mechanisms. Human teachers make mistakes and material gets outdated, and while online teachers are rectified faster than classroom teachers, the procedure is still not optimal. Knowledge should be a bit more like a verified wiki.
2. Some have great interactive coding environments, some have great videos, some have awesome texts, some have helpful communities. None has it all. In the end, I don't want to learn a new language by writing code in my browser. It could all be integrated/synced to the point where IDEs have plugins which are synced to online videos, with tests and exercises built in, up to a social network where you could send snippets for review and add reviews to other people's code.
3. Accreditation. Some platforms offer this against payment, but I think those platforms often feel very old school (pun intended), with fixed schedules, marks and enrollments. Self paced is a must.
4. Depth is important. Current online courses are often a bit introductory. We need more advanced courses about algorithms, theoretical computer science, code design, relational algebra, category theory, etc. I get that it's about supply/demand, but we will eventually need to have those topics covered.
I do believe that for CS, full online education will eventually win from the classroom — it's still in its infancy, but has more potential to grow into correct, modern education.10
Do you know what is world needs?
Good fucking tutorials for all programming languages.
Every time I want to learn a language it's a fucking mess. Tutorial here, tutorial there. Read the docs, it's fucking outdated. This person using this design, that person using that.
I am so tired of this shit.
also, for a simple example most website uses some complex architecture, something they think is the next thing.
Even searching for a simple QT singleton pattern gives me a webpage from QT Wiki which uses templates, typedefs and this shits to just show a FUCKING EXAMPLE OF THREAD SAFE SINGLETON.
I really wish there's was a greater platform for this. A platform that follows some certain standard rules for tutorials.10
After reading the wiki page over and over, I was finally able to implement Dijkstra's algorithm 😃4
Who the fuck came up with the idea of using SharePoint? What it even is?! Is it a website, wiki, document repo...?
Our version seems to be a broken wiki with no info content, old links, illogical navigation. And somehow word documents are integrated into it. Sometimes you see some weird calendar and timelines (from old projects). You can navigate into a folder, but you cannot get back. There's no ".." button?? You can map it like OneDrive to yourself, but Windows doesn't support any document version control. Where's the check in/out option from explorer menu??? I sure as shit have those for SVN, GIT etc. Is there a new version created everytime I press ctrl-s or only when I close the document?
Well, I could open the document in "online" mode. Ok, the formatting goes weird and everything is super slow. But at least I can fuck up someone elses document by accidentaly copy/pasting stuff, deleting lines, hitting my face into keyboard etc. There's automatically new version added!
Somehow you can enable the forced check in/out for documents. Obviously only the library admin can do that. And since he's just a program manager, he has no clue what the fuck is version control or document management. So he has this thing on his "things to do" list. For him, document management means sending various spec versions as email attachments. And the developers can figure out together who has the most recent one.
How did M$ push shit piece of shit to corporations? They even use this crap for the intranet making it slower than creation of galaxies. Though it's ok, since you cannot find anything from the intranet. It's all just head honchos blogs, seasonal greetings and stock market statuses. Nowhere is seen the downstairs cafeteria menu for the day. Or where to report for broken toilet. You know, stuff that 99% of people would like to see.
I complained to M$ about the SharePoint, but apparently there's no problem. You can code it yourself? Yeiii! So, instead of just updating some line in design spec, I have to take a 3 month class and get a MS sertificate, code some class-based-web-shit for 6 months and maybe, maybe then I can make the page/document look normal?
I am thinking, that I will just start writing my specs on paper. I will put them on the shelf and if you want to read it, you will check it out manually. And if someone else tries to edit it while you are editing it, you just cover the paper with your hands. There might be a requirement to make the document look more like MS Word, but that's easy to do. Just go to WC with the paper and wipe with it a couple of times.10
So what do you guys do when you're bored?
My friends : Browse Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, read some blogs maybe..
Me : Browse through the Arch Linux wiki... I mean,... you know Twitter, Reddit, the usual..6
It's essentially all meta you need to make a pokemon game, in csv files.
Afaik, they ripped the information from the original games, so you can be sure about their validity.
I love how it's easy to use, isn't some weird ass formatted wiki and even has scripts to load it into your database.
Me being a huge pokemon fan, that's the non plus ultra.
Friend: " How many layers of madlad are you on?"
Me: "uhm... I made a Proot of ubuntu for a ubuntu machine once"
Friend: Watch me
[Sees him use Arch Wiki for his Debian problems]2
*gets annoyed by how vi command in Ubuntu WSL points to vim*
To be clear, that's due to update-alternatives in Ubuntu, not WSL specifically.
*le me ducking how to install vi instead, because vim in WSL has scrolling issues*
"install vi ubuntu"
> How do I install and get started with vim/vi? - Ask Ubuntu
> apt - Vim installation in Ubuntu 14.04 - Ask Ubuntu
> Ubuntu Linux: Install vim Text Editor - nixCraft
-.- I'm not looking for vim ffs, I already have that installed.
"install vi ubuntu -vim"
> Same fucking results
"!g install vi ubuntu -vim"
> Installing the VI Perl Toolkit from Source Code—Linux - VMware
> FedoraDirectoryServerClientHowto - Community Help Wiki - Ubuntu …
> Learn How To Use Linux vi Editor And Its Commands - LinOxide
Oh for fuck's sake!!!
So here's my question because apparently search engines clearly can't point me to it, and Ubuntu doesn't seem to have vi as "vi" in their repositories either. Do our Canonical overlords allow people to actually make /usr/bin/vi actually be fucking vi?15
Ever heard of event-based programming? Nope? Well, here we are.
This is a software design pattern that revolves around controlling and defining state and behaviour. It has a temporal component (the code can rewind to a previous point in time), and is perfectly suited for writing state machines.
I think I could use some peer-review on this idea.
Here's the original spec for a full language: https://gist.github.com/voodooattac...
(which I found to be completely unnecessary, since I just implemented this pattern in plain TypeScript with no extra dependencies. See attached image for how TS code looks like).
The fact that it transcends language barriers if implemented as a library instead of a full language means less complexity in the face of adaptation.
Moving on, I was reviewing the idea again today when I discovered an amazing fact: because this is based on gene expression, and since DNA is recombinant, any state machine code built using this pattern is also recombinant. Meaning you can mix and match condition bodies (as you would mix complete genes) in any program and it would exhibit the functionality you picked or added.
You can literally add behaviour from a program (for example, an NPC) to another by copying and pasting new code from a file to another. Assuming there aren't any conflicts in variable names between the two, and that the variables (for example `state.health` and `state.mood`) mean the same thing to both programs.
If you combine two unrelated programs (a server and a desktop application, for example) then assuming there are no variables clashing, your new program will work as a desktop application and as a server at the same time.
I plan to publish the TypeScript reference implementation/library to npm and GitHub once it has all basic functionality, along with an article describing this and how it all works.
I wish I had a good academic background now, because I think this is worthy of a spec/research paper. Unfortunately, I don't have any connections in academia. (If you're interested in writing a paper about this, please let me know)
Edit: here's the current preliminary code: https://gist.github.com/voodooattac...
When I found the power of poke on c64, and how to output sprites rather than use print statements. Finally, my text adventures changed into full blown rogue-likes!
Person: "What is bool?"
Me: "Boolean, true or false."
Person: "But why is it called that?"
Brother: "Because it's based on boolean algebra. Made by George Boole."
I have established "Depressed Lonely Maggot" Club. Our symbol will be an ugly crying maggot.
You are invited :311
Update on my previous kernel rant, I finally compiled it down to just 2.9GB! included all the needed modules and I am also able to boot off of it!
Great news is, that sound both on speakers and also through headphones work, bad news is, that there's some overlayed buzz/distortion, the playback is higher pitched and chrome for some reason plays videos "normally" if you set it to 0.5 speed, else the video get sped up in the "normal" speed setting, well fuck me, but atleast I am closer, also as always thanks to arch wiki, that has tons of resources.
It might be some of the quick hacks that causes this, that I used in the past to make sound work through an external usb card atleast, so might be worth it just reinstalling it all.17
Have you ever heard the story of the first bug in software development?
The first documented bug was actually a bug. There was a moth trapped inside the computer causing the bugs.
I don't know what non-German people do without ubuntuusers.de.
Without this wiki, I probably would know nothing about Linux today. I would have never been introduced to it as a child, would never been able to learn that much, play around with desktop Ubuntu, Raspberry Pis, administrate own servers...
So, thank you, ubuntuusers.de, for helping little Benedikt with Ubuntu in his mother tongue, and making me the Linux enthusiast I am today!6
From acme.sh manpage:
"--yes-I-know-dns-manual-mode-enough-go-ahead-please Force to use dns manual mode: https://github.com/Neilpang/..."1
After a few weeks of being insanely busy, I decided to log onto Steam and maybe relax with a few people and play some games. I enjoy playing a few sandbox games and do freelance development for those games (Anywhere from a simple script to a full on server setup) on the side. It just so happened that I had an 'urgent' request from one of my old staff member from an old community I use to own. This staff member decided to run his own community after I sold mine off since I didn't have the passion anymore to deal with the community on a daily basis.
O: Owner (Former staff member/friend)
D: Other Dev
O: Hey, I need urgent help man! Got a few things developed for my server, and now the server won't stay stable and crashes randomly. I really need help, my developer can't figure it out.
Me: Uhm, sure. Just remember, if it's small I'll do it for free since you're an old friend, but if it's a bigger issue or needs a full recode or whatever, you're gonna have to pay. Another option is, I tell you what's wrong and you can have your developer fix it.
O: Sounds good, I'll give you owner access to everything so you can check it out.
Me: Sounds good
*An hour passes by*
O: Sorry it took so long, had to deal with some crap. *Insert credentials, etc*
Me: Ok, give me a few minutes to do some basic tests. What was that new feature or whatever you added?
O: *Explains long feature, and where it's located*
Me: *Begins to review the files* *Internal rage wondering what fucking developer could code such trash* *Tests a few methods, and watches CPU/RAM and an internal graph for usage*
Me: Who coded this module?
O: My developer.
Me: *Calm tone, with a mix of some anger* So, you know what, I'm just gonna do some simple math for ya. You're running 33 ticks a second for the server, with an average of about 40ish players. 33x60 = 1980 cycles a minute, now lets times that by the 40 players on average, you have 79,200 cycles per minute or nearly 4.8 fucking cycles an hour (If you maxed the server at 64 players, it's going to run an amazing fucking 7.6 million cycles an hour, like holy fuck). You're also running a MySQLite query every cycle while transferring useless data to the server, you're clusterfucking the server and overloading it for no fucking reason and that's why you're crashing it. Another question, who the fuck wrote the security of this? I can literally send commands to the server with this insecure method and delete all of your files... If you actually want your fucking server stable and secure, I'm gonna have to recode this entire module to reduce your developer's clusterfuck of 4.8 million cycles to about 400 every hour... it's gonna be $50.
D: *Angered* You're wrong, this is the best way to do it, I did stress testing! *Insert other defensive comments* You're just a shitty developer (This one got me)
Me: *Calm* You're calling me a shitty developer? You're the person that doesn't understand a timer, I get that you're new to this world, but reading the wiki or even using the game's forums would've ripped this code to shreds and you to shreds. You're not even a developer, cause most of this is so disorganized it looks like you copy and pasted it. *Get's angered here and starts some light screaming* You're wasting CPU usage, the game can't use more than 1 physical core, and after a quick test, you're stupid 'amazing' module is using about 40% of the CPU. You need to fucking realize the 40ish average players, use less than this... THEY SHOULD BE MORE INTENSIVE THAN YOUR CODE, NOT THE OPPOSITE.
O: Hey don't be rude to Venom, he's an amazing coder. You're still new, you don't know as much as him. Ok, I'll pay you the money to get it recoded.
Me: Sounds good. *Angered tone* Also you developer boy, learn to listen to feedback and maybe learn to improve your shitty code. Cause you'll never go anywhere if you don't even understand who bad this garbage is, and that you can't even use the fucking wiki for this game. The only fucking way you're gonna improve is to use some of my suggestions.
D: *Leaves call without saying anything*
TL;DR: Shitty developer ran some shitty XP system code for a game nearly 4.8 million times an hour (average) or just above 7.6 million times an hour (if maxed), plus running MySQLite when it could've been done within about like 400 an hour at max. Tried calling me a shitty developer, and got sorta yelled at while I was trying to keep calm.
Still pissed he tried calling me a shitty developer...
A non-technical colleague said she bought some bitcoin on a site over a year ago.
She doesn't remember the name of the website.4
Just now I was reading on https://pve.proxmox.com/wiki/... about high availability. Now my Proxmox VE is just a tower (which happens to have ECC memory) that's stored in my storage room (and which is mostly used for experimental and home server purposes). But my mail servers.. those have been made with high availability in mind. Most importantly, I've made their services entirely redundant (but within the same datacenter). And when they have updates, I apply updates to one, reboot, see if it didn't break something and then do the same to the other server after the first one came up again. So no downtime whatsoever.
If memory serves me right, I think that I've been able to maintain these servers for the last year without any downtime at all (I reboot them every month to apply new kernels but they haven't both been simultaneously down at any moment). Does that make them High Availability? My interventions regarding their availability have been rather trivial. Is it really that hard..?4
Few months back, I reported a vulnerability in an open source project due to the fake alarm from Github without understanding it's consequences. The author of that project immediately locked, and closed the issue and deleted the detail.
Though he was annoyed with my this act but he taught me a good lesson of responsibility.
For me the best of being a dev was described by Fred Brooks in his "The Mythical Man-Month":
...The programmer, like the poet, works only slightly removed from pure thought-stuff. He builds his castles in the air, from air, creating by exertion of the imagination. Few media of creation are so flexible, so easy to polish and rework, so readily capable of realizing grand conceptual structures....
Yet the program construct, unlike the poet's words, is real in the sense that it moves and works, producing visible outputs separate from the construct itself. […] The magic of myth and legend has come true in our time. One types the correct incantation on a keyboard, and a display screen comes to life, showing things that never were nor could be...
Did you know german was turing complete?
Do you know german?
Just stumbled upon www.en.wikipedia.org/wiki/hexspeak and started following all of the links.
Reached a whole new level of procrastinating. Now I have no idea what my professor is talking about.
Good job me😬💥2
When in internship you have to read 150000 lines of code to make changes and the code does not have any comments, no indentation, no documentation, no wiki. You'll be like fuck this shit. I'm outta here.1
This whole Microsoft & GitHub thing is how it begins:
oh it's really cool, Microsoft is adding some cool features we've been missing for a while, GitHub is still great
Alright, there's this new `msgit` that has some really cool features for rebasing and merge conflicts, I won't need to worry about fucking up my git history
`msgit` is not compatible with `git` and GitHub requires us to use it, but what can we do, all our code and build triggers are set up..
I don't want to paint dark clouds, but I heard this theory at work and it makes sense that Ms would take it in a direction where people are locked in to their ecosystem. It won't happen immediately, but all signs point to this.
My first exposure to computers was this strange bit of equipment: https://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
Oh my God, I'm feeling old! :-)2
Since everyone is swithcing to Linux I decided to switch to it myself. I chose Arch, as I have some experience with linux. After a couple of hours trying to get my PC to boot from USB (I forgot to turn secure boot of) I began installing. After about 2 hours of switching between install and chroot and the installed system to get Wi-Fi to work (fucking Wi-Fi!!) I was ready to install gui. I decided to go with i3, xfce terminal and zsh + oh-my-zsh. It took me about 5 hours to get the UI looking decent.
In the meantine I learned about AUR and yaourt and how to make a user that can use sudo.
After about 7-8 hours I can say that I actually love it!
What I love:
-yaourt: it can install any software you need. Not in official repo? No problem! It will find it in AUR.
-Pulse Audio: I can controll exactly how loud anything is.
-i3: just i3 in general. It was hard to get used to it at first (coming from windows and xfce), but after 10 minutes I didn't even use mouse.
What I didn't like:
-Getting Wi-Fi to work relyably. I had to switch between install media and live system many times just to install a package that is apparently needed for it, but it's not obvious on the wiki.
-Getting polish characters (like ę,ł,ś) to work took 2 hours and I got to the 4th page in google to find a working solution.
-lack of usefull documentation on what is needed to get a GUI working. There is just a paragraph that to run a DE or WM you need x11 server installed. After installing it and running startx nothing happened. After some googleing I learned that I also needed sddm or lightdm-gtk-greetet installed AND enabled by systemctl enable and NOT systemctl start.
-Systemd-boot. It can automatically detect that I have windows installed, but not the arch linux install I just did? What the fuck? Why?
Overall, if someone asked me if it was warth I would probably say yes. If I end up not liking it I still have my Windows install (for gaming) intact (I hope, I didn't check) I can return to.15
I despise any service, framework or any software that has as its documentation a wiki. The wiki is always outdated, always links to deleted content, always has code examples that are wrong and always forgets any notion of best practices.4
It took me like 3 hours to install stupid mariadb on my fucking arch. From the service not beeing able to start over not finding the correct base dir to permission problems in the data dir.
Well, after reading the wiki it was actually pretty easy (only minor problems) ...
Today I learned two things:
- I must be fucking dumb
- Reading the manual instead of guessing helps a lot when installing stuff on linux21
Soo... I made a bytecode editor for Java just for fun. On the left you can see the original decompiled class, on the right a slightly changed class which still runs normally. Below you can see the pure ASM bytecode :)
It's pretty awesome for learning how bytecode works (together with a listing like https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...)! It also has an AutoComplete feature and some syntax highlighting (which I'm still working on).
What's special about it? It's a pure text parser! It assembles a full class from just a String!
If you want to look at it: https://github.com/SuspiciousActivi...
(I'm new to GitHub, don't judge me :D)4
What kind of sick joke is it that the url for camelCase on wikipedia is www.wikipedia.org/wiki/Camel_case1
Anyone here a graphic designer / web developer that got an early look on your life by commanding a turtle to draw pictures for you?
Another guiding principle of Arch Linux development is freedom. Users are not only permitted to make all decisions concerning system configuration, but also choose what their system will be. Some choose to create paper-weights, some choose to make dumb-bells, still others melt down all the silicon and make a sword out of it.
By keeping the system simple, Arch Linux provides the freedom to make any choice about the system, including the choice to not have a system at all.
Source - http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/...1
IT description of remote access tool on IT wiki page:
"Support for latest Mac and Windows release"
Also same page:
"macOS Mojave is not yet supported (...) Please do not upgraded until instructed"
When some random Assembly code I got off the OSDev Wiki actually booted on real hardware. This is where I'm meant to be.1
People use IMDB to find onfo for films
I use it to fasten my database
I found this on a wiki with Haskell Humor... it's interesting...
How to Shoot Your Self in the Foot With Haskell: Putting the unsafe in unsafePerformIO!
You shoot the gun, but the bullet gets trapped in the IO monad.
Couldn't match expected type 'Deer' against inferred type 'Foot'.
While compiling your program the compiler produces a type error long enough to overflow a kernel buffer, overwrite the trigger control register and shoot you in the foot.
After trying to decipher the type errors from the compiler, your head explodes.
After you've finally found a way to circumvent the type system and shoot yourself in the foot, Oleg appears out of nothing and shoots you in the foot for coming up with it before him.
You shoot the gun but nothing happens (Haskell is pure, after all).
Your foot is fine, until you try to walk on it, at which point it becomes mangled.
You have a shootFoot function which you've proven correct. QuickCheck validates it for arbitrary you-like values. It will be evaluated only when you end up at the hospital. You hope this doesn't come to pass, as it actually returns a bullet-ridden copy of yourself and you don't want to be garbage-collected.
foreign import ccall "shootparts.h shootfoot" shoot_foot :: Gun -> Programmer -> IO ()
shootSelfInFoot = unsafePerformIO . shoot . foot $ self -- Shoot self in foot 0 or more times depending on evaluation order
No instance for (Target Foot)
arising from use of `shoot' at SelfInflictedInjury.hs:1:0
Possible fix: add an instance declaration for (Target Foot)
In the expression: shoot foot
You go to shoot yourself in the foot but the bullet is in the ST monad and the gun is in the IO monad, so you can't.
You ask Haskell to shoot you in the foot but by the rules of lazy evaluation you don't need the result yet so it doesn't happen.
You decide to shoot yourself in the foot but get distracted devising a ballistics algebra and wondering if you can do the calculations in the type system.
You want to shoot yourself in the foot but realize there is no Gun datatype so use Arrows instead.
You shoot in the direction of your foot, but since you are inside the STM monad you can just retry until you figure out what to do.
You shoot yourself in the foot, but you are perfectly fine as long you just don't evaluate the foot.
You shoot yourself in the foot, but nothing happens unless you start walking.
Don't forget about memory consumption! If you don't look, the bullet causes heap overflow. If you look, the bullet causes stack overflow.
You *appear* to have deliberately shot yourself in the foot, and yet your program actually runs perfectly OK due to lazy evaluation. (So long as you remember to not look at your foot...)
You aim the gun at your foot, pull the trigger and remove the clip. When you look at your undamaged foot, the hammer clicks on an empty barrel.1
Automatically generating docs from DocBlock comments, then converting the output to markdown AND publishing it all to GitHub Wiki using travis took me two fucking days!
I'm SO happy with the result now!
I even had to fork and update the composer package I'm using!!!
Here's the link to the wiki:
Finally finished my 3rd freeCodeCamp project!
It's really hard doing this while on tests and almost on exame period (I'm having good grades thought).
Basically It was supposed to make an wikipedia viewer app (kinda like a search engine for wikipedia).
They asked us to make external links to the respective wiki pages, but instead I had the idea of making an iframe and show the content inpage.
Really fun stuff! Because I've never done anything similar it was very interesting.
What do you think?
(Probably the wikipedia page is not very responsive on mobile)
Sometimes I get distracted because of a very technical joke that I don't get initially, but am determined to understand.
4,000 Wikipedia articles later, I understand the joke and now know the history of the pushpin (or some other off the rails object)
I changed IP address of the domain A record to point to his new site. Told him it could take a day to propagate, but usually fine in a few hours. 2 hours later... "Microsoft is pointing to new site but Google isn't". I have to make some assumptions here, who else calls a browser by its fucking parent company, that is if he is talking about that or search engines. Anyway just sent him my favourite wiki link on how to clear browser cache and hopefully he will fuck off indefinitely.1
I have to share this. These guys are unbelievable! They claim they will build this console that will run a modded Debian Linux. Ok so far...
But then they say that it will run Windows games...
Wine you may think?!
They say they will make a 'revolutionary' motherboard, that will RUN WINDOWS GAMES (?!?!?), WITHOUT WINDOWS!!!! And they will do this by putting a fucking FPGA chip on the board!!! That will INTERPRET .EXE FILES (IN HARDWARE LEVEL!!!)
They must be gods to run an .exe file using nothing but (V)HDL without the shared libraries and at hardware level!
FUCK! I'M MAD!!!
Scammers gonna scam!
P.S.: FPGA - https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/...8
So after my hosting my first project and announcing it on devrant, the users pointed out the many security faults and places where the code can be exploited ( thank you so much ). So I started my research on security ( im 99% self-taught ). The first thing I landed across is the code vulnerabilities which the I can fix then the vulnerabilities of the language itself and then binary code to overrun whatever the language it is. Well, the topic gets broader and broader. If I click on a link named xxx vulnerabilities oh god that is a whole new collection of hundeds of wiki like pages. I feel like I'm lost and here I need some real help2
When you click on the github wiki of the API you wanted to use and it shows you the "Create the first page" banner....
Guess I'll have to find another API with proper fucking documentation.2
Okay, I understand that they want to lock down the Chromebooks they send home with us, we don't own them and they have the right to do that. But I'm still annoyed when I find "harmless" stuff is blocked.
They said it themselves that they want us to be able to do basically anything we want web browsing wise on them.
It's not a fun experience to say to your self "hey let's look at the current humble bundles!" just to find that humblebundle.com is blocked for "games". (Which makes sense, but I can't remember any other examples)
Imagine thinking to yourself "I'm going to go to the Os Dev Wiki" and typing that into the Omnibox (tm) and pressing enter, directing you to your favorite search engine duckduckgo, but instead of finding the amazing duckduckgo results page you find the godforsaken securly "THIS PAGE IS BLOCKED" screen.
I can guess why they do that (probably because, to my knowledge, duckduckgo doesn't have any form of "safe-search" feature they can force it to use because they do that) but it's kind of annoying to not be able to use your favorite search engine anymore.
Should I really be getting so annoyed at this? No, because it's not my device, it's theirs and, they have the final say on what goes, but sometimes it really annoys me. I should be, and am, thankful they even let us bring the Chromebooks home, which is pretty cool.
If you want a fun time, just read the reviews on the Securly extension in the chrome web store!5
I've created an interpreter that I am very proud of :)
It's based off the variation of Scheme(I think, maybe just Lisp) called Lel.
So my language is like a variation of a variation of Lisp... Written in an Interpreter(Python).
I've got a wiki, and source code on GitHub:
Thanks for any feedback. And help appreciated!11
During my job hunt as a Java Developer looking for job while on a job just like what every other developers do, around twenty twelve i got an invite from one of the companies i applied for, i wasn't expecting a test though but i was prepared for it anyway. The test proceeds, i and the other partakers were given separate systems and spread out across the room like teams in a football match, i don't know if they planned on making us nervous, it seemed so very awkward. First question was *Who originally developed Java (like seriously???? i almost cummed!) i skipped... skip skip skip. After so many skipping minutes i then arrived at that question ***Check string for palindrome, hmmm i then noticed my system was connected to an open wifi (don't know if it was a dumb mistake or on purpose). I definitely googled and faithful loving heavens i found the website were they got all 21 questions with their answers from (https://simpleprogrammer.com/progra...). I answered all questions using different approach, applied xml commenting, state possibility and outcome of each code block, added wiki references, i flawed the test. Few days later i received a call for final interview, got there and the interviewer was like "Do you teach/lecture on coding or something? cus you really did pretty good on the test the other day", I felt like a god and was like "no, i don't. just did what i had to do". Seems like he loved my reply and i got the job without a second question. The open network is still a mystery to me till date.6
Y'all ever heard of a heisenbug? I've run into them a few times, but never knew they had their own term! XD
Sooooo.... I just read that CSS 3 is actually Turing complete. So ha to all of you that say CSS isn't a programming language. It's been proven that it is. HA. This is the second greatest day of my life, only after finding out that Powerpoint is Turing complete. Yeah.
A 'senior' dev just questioned us (by question, I mean scold) when I suggest writing some additional information regarding db patching scheme of our project on our Wiki, just thought it might be useful for other possibly new devs later.
Apparently that would be 'spoon- feeding' them and it is totally NOT GOOD.
oh FFS my university pissed me off so bad right now that I had to wait 20 min to cool down to be able to write a rant about it...
so, one of the university department offer an email address which is the official university approved email for student packs like jetbrain's. I wanted to renew my jetbrains subscription, but for that I have to get a verification email on that address..
But since the only time I use it is this annual renewal I dont know the webmail's url..
So I search for it on the department pages, services and its nowhere to be found. Finaly I found it on a student maintained wiki page.
I try to log in.. no luck. try another password, still not it. Try all of the passwords that I remember using in the previous 3 year and no luck.
well fck it the password change is managed by a website where I can log in with a different method, so I change the password and try to log in again.
No fcking luck! And at this point I bashed my head against the wall because I found out that the password change takes them about 1 or 2 hours... hours! wtf...5
You know that moment, when you look for something on wikipedia, and after few hiperlinks you are reading about influence of penguins on Mars' day length or othen nonsense?
Just happened to me like 4th time when reading Django documentation. It is so well written and easy to understand, that I just click and click and want to go deeper, and then realise I have to read what I need, because I never ever got to it in the first place.
Gotta love the people who make such docs. I never could, and prbly will.1
Just to help out folks who find this week's group rant topic just as confusing as I did:
While we mourn this dark future of the internet, let it not hamper International Developer Day!
Happy Day of the Programmer Devrant!
TIL Wikipedia was funded by revenue from a porn site.
Porn is everywhere!
It's so obvious porn is the one thing that can bring popularity to VR and AR technology.
pic: Wikipedia founder with some porn stars9
I just watched this video about Edge and it gave me a different perspective about the product.
One thing I liked the most and want to share with all (most of you might be aware of it already, but still) is the web browser rendering engine.
The browser's user interface just complies HTML, CSS and JS at run time, rest of the processing is managed by the rendering engine.
Okay so what excites me more about is progressive web apps. This is something really coooool.
Curious readers navigate here -> https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
So something like devRant can be accessed directly as an desktop application without having to install any particular app using the rendering engine.
There is more to it here. devRant app runs as a stand alone app and not in Edge (or any other browser) with its own custom UI interface.
Fucking cool. No need to open the browser at all or install more and more applications worrying for updates. Moreover be updated all the time while accessing the dynamic content with custom user interface.
I am not sure whether Google Chrome or Mozilla have this kind of feature but if Edge has it, I am looking forward to explore more of it.2
I received two emails today inviting me for video call interviews at two companies I applied to.
I am supposed to select a date for this week or next week, but our office resumes work on Monday, the 7th.
I only have tomorrow and the day after (3rd and 4th) left for this week. I need time to prepare, so I am thinking of booking one for 4th and one for next week.
I am trying not to start the year by skipping work. I already skipped work in December because of a brief illness (lol).
I am thinking, if I go to work on that day, I might get summoned into a meeting and miss my interview. So, I have concluded that I will have to skip work on that day, but now I can't think of excuses.
Once i noticed that in Arch Linux every time i need something - i make it work by myself. Thought i tired of it. And decided to install Ubuntu and forget about any tinkering and tweaking. Just install and fucking work.
And this laggy shit welcomes me with "Sorry, Ubuntu 18.04 has experienced an internal error" message. I almost killed myself with facepalm. I started chrome and checked RAM usage: 2GB! I can't describe how slow was it.
I think is better to dive into arch wiki and make your dream distro. Mine uses KDE Plasma, which more customizable, much prettier, smooth, and uses ~400MB of RAM.
Try Arch, friends3
//long rant ahead!
I need to plan a Wiki with SharePoint for not connected Sites.
Im now in dispute with my CoWorker since 3 Months, this is how the conversation goes. My two bosses are involved in this and also unhappy about SharePoint.
[C refers to CoWorker, M for me]
C: Hey, we finished SharePoint with Selfservice Storage Rooms. They even have a Wiki.
M: Okay cool, will check it out
C: Well we need to also plan the Wiki inside, I already asked our Department Head and he agreed, that you will be the one.
M: Okkkkaaayy, normaly it's your job to do such things, but welp, I will look into it, if we can work with it.
(2 Weeks pass)
M: I checked SharePoint out and tested everything. The Wiki is a Nogo, we need a other solution or programm for ourself a Wiki Integration/Engine. Did you maybe check out Confluence? It has also a SharePoint integration plugin.
C: We wont do Confluence, too expensive (already overspent the budget for SharePoint in six digits 🤬). Also we wont add to SharePoint Custom Code, it needs to stay standard.
M: Thats impossible, SharePoint Wiki is shit and also handels sites just like documents, no brain behind! Also you overspent the Budget and now it's my Problem?!
C: You need to do the best out of it.
(3 weeks passes and we get a meeting with the department heads)
M: Alright I made a UseCase and documented where the essential flaws are in SharePoint Wiki and why we cant use it.
Boss: Ok if it's impossible to use, then we will stay on our Fileserver for Documents and wont use SharePoint.
M: Thats not my Point, my statement is, as status today, SharePoint Wiki is not the right solution, code or buy software to it.
Boss: We will do a Prove of Concept, if it doesnt work then we will aboard it.
M: Well it is only some missing essentials, like hierarchy and Groups for the Pages, Example Confluence has this. If we could built in this features in SharePoint, everything would work out.
C: (angry) I told you that we wont use Confluence!
M: (calm) I said we need Features, not Confluence. Please mind the consent.
(3 weeks passes, and one more meating with bosses)
M: alright here again is a analyses, why already in Theory the current SharePoint Wiki wont work. It's already flawed in the core.
Boss: Yea SharePoint is crap, I checked out confluence and thats a real Wiki.
C: Well I dont know anything about Confluence and never looked at it. But if SharePoint is a fail we need the Proof of Concept.
M: Why do we need to do a Proof of Concept, when it already doesnt work in Theory! Thats nonsence and unlogical.
Next meeting will be in 4 weeks and I will give him the FUCKING PROOF OF CONCEPT. I will be a Bastard and build behind CoWorkers back a Confluence Wiki to show the Departmentheads how to built it right.
I hate CoWorker now, he makes a part of my loved Job a hell, I will goddamn cuk Coworker to space, that fucking Cukatron of lazyness and shit 🤬. I provide the Solutions and you just say no, how dafuq will the project advance, if you always say NO! Are you so unflexible and fixed on your Castle of Ignorancy!5
Last weak I tried to use Linux Arch on my VM. The only Linux distribution I'm used to is Ubuntu and the fist time I launched Arch I completely forgot that it was " do it yourself ". And that the ISO isn't actually a fancy installer like the Ubuntu one.
So I started following a guide and found out that the arch wiki is actually the way to go.
I searched for 1 hour how to change the keyboard to swiss-french which was actually pretty simple.
After that exhausting research that made me realise how ignorant I am with UNIX universe, I finally tried to install the thing.
When I was done installing, it didn't want to boot after I restarted. I got stuck at the 'Booting...' screen. After a few tries I lost all my energy and motivation.
Tl;dr: Tried Arch Linux, realised I had no idea, gave up after a few tries5
Merry Sol Invictus to everyone.
Many and many centuries ago, ancient people celebrated this day as the day in which the sun was reborn, because days get longer and longer (we know that actually that day is 21st of December).
I created a Discord bot for devRant using devRant.NET API.
Check it out here:
The German Wikipedia article about brute force defines it as "decryption method" 🤔🤔😂
Was just thinking that there should be a Developer day... I look it up online, and there is.
A loooong time ago...
I've started my first serious job as a developer. I was young yet enthusiastic as well as a kind of a greenhorn. First time working in a business, working with a team full of experienced full-lowered ultra-seniors which were waiting to teach me the everything about software engineering.
Beside one senior which was the team lead as well there were two other devs. One of them was very experienced and a pretty nice guy, I could ask him anytime and he would sit down with me a give me advice. I've learned a lot of him.
Fast forward three months (yes, three months).
I was not that full kind of greenhorn anymore and people started to give me serious tasks. I had some experience in doing deployments and stuff from my other job as a sysadmin before so I was soon known as the "deployment guy", setting up deployments for our projects the right way and monitoring as well as executing them. But as it should be in every good team we had to share our knowledge so one can be on vacation or something and another colleague was able to do the task as well.
So now we come to the other teammate. The one I was not talking about till now. And that for a reason.
He was very nice too and had a couple of years as a dev on his CV, but...yeah...like...
When I switched some production systems to Linux he had to learn something about Linux. Everytime he encountered an error message he turned around and asked me how to fix it. Even. For. The. Simplest. Error. He. Could. Google. Up.
I mean okay, when one's new to a system it's not that easy, but when you have an error message which prints out THE SOLUTION FOR THE ERROR and he asks me how to fix it...excuse me?
This happened over 30 times.
Later on I had to introduce him to the deployment workflow for a project, so he could eventually deploy the staging environment and the production environment by hisself.
I introduced him. Not for 10 minutes. I explained him the whole workflow and the very main techniques and tools used for like two hours. Every then and when I stopped and asked him if he had any questions. He had'nt! Wonderful!
Haha. Oh no.
So he had to do his first production deployment. I sat by his side to monitor everything. He did well. One or two questions but he did well.
The same when he did his second prod deploy. Everythings fine.
And then. It. Frikkin. Begins.
I was working on the project, did some changes to the code. Okay, deploy it to dev, time for testing.
Error checking out git. Okay, awkward. Got to investigate...
On the dev server were some files changed. Strange. The repo was all up to date. But these changes seemed newer because they were fixing at least one bug I was working on.
This doubles the strangeness.
I want over to my colleague's desk.
I asked him about any recent changes to the codebase.
"Yeah, there was a bug you were working on right? But the ticket was open like two days so I thought I'll fix it"
What the Heck dude, this bug was not critical at all and I had other tasks which were more important. Okay, but what about the changed files?
"Oh yeah, I could not remember the exact deployment steps (hint from the author: I wrote them down into our internal Wiki, he wrote them done by hisself when introducing him and after all it's two frikkin commands), so I uploaded them via FTP"
"Uhm... that's not how we do it buddy. We have to follow the procedure to avoid..."
"The boss said it was fine so I uploaded the changes directly to the production servers. It's so much easier via FTP and not this deployment crap, sorry to say that"
You. Did. What?
I could not resist and asked the boss about this. But this had not Effect at all, was the long-time best-buddy-schmuddy-friend of the boss colleague's father.
So in the end I sat there reverting, committing and deploying.
It's soooo much harder this deployment crap.
Years later, a long time after I quit the job and moved to another company, I get to know that the colleague now is responsible for technical project management.
Karma's a bitch, right?
This was shit funny.
One morning, one of my colleagues got a direct call from project architect that he has to setup a meeting to explain in depth the project he has been taking care of for months and prepare a presentation and send an invite. Two weeks later we are all invited to this meeting. This colleague acting as host of this meeting prepared for few days on the PowerPoint and also a well crafted demo. Then as the architect joins, this colleague starts speaking about his role and the project. Within a minute, the architect interrupts him and says 'shut the fuck up, I don't think you are ready yet for this meeting maybe we need someone more learned...so hmm....let me explain it'. And this architect then uses his PPT for sometime and then pulls up a whiteboard and draws birds and spiders telling every time to see system in it.
My colleague is screwed to shit and is incapable to speak when closing the call.
Later ahead 4 weeks, his PPT is retouched and recoloured and attached to a Wiki page created by a unknown fucker who happens to have direct mobile calls with this architect.
Who's is faulty or not or what happened it still shocks most when this architect joins the scrum call daily. Fuck him.1
So last night I ran out of space on my root partition, apparently 30GB isn't enough for `/` besides `/home` and `/data` because both `/var` and `/usr` used around 14GB each so I decided to create partitions for them, had 500GB unallocated disk space on my SSD for if I wanted to install windows on my machine besides Arch Linux.
I edited the fstab file and sure enough, the partitions were mounted on boot, everything went fine. Then U realised the data wasn't actually removed from the first partition so I decided to mount the drive again and remove the files, the system still worked fine.
Untill I rebooted. Apparently the bit scripts require files in the`/usr` folder which wasn't mounted at boot, but right after. F*ck, system won't boot and now I'm in a recovery shell in busybox. After googling and reading the arch wiki I noticed a small message saying what you should do if you want to have `/usr` on another partition. I didn't do any of that.
After a couple of hours and a lot of reboots and chroots from a live USB to the broken installation it was fixed without losing any data! I did learn to read the manual or wiki to see any specifics when using more partitions. 😂2
i's reading about Munchausen syndrome.
( https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/... )
So what if someone tries to feign Munchausen syndrome itself?6
Dual-booted Gaming Computer: A Saga of Frustration, Alcoholism*, and Relief
So a while back my gaming computer was booting Antergos Linux and Windows 10. It took me a few months, but I finally became fed up with Windows 10's bullshit of putting ads in the OS (Suggested Apps, OneDrive, etc.) and reinstating all of their defaults after an upgrade (Edge, privacy settings, the People Button in 1709).
So, I backed up my data and installed Windows 7. Windows 7 has a bright, consistent look, and in my opinion still holds up as a good operating system.
However, I couldn't boot into Antergos after that. For whatever reason, no matter how hard I tried, I just wasn't able to. So, I decided to reinstall. Might as well, anyway.
Now, I have an nVidia card, which does not play well with the OSS drivers, so it's basically normal for me to have to unplug my card and use the on-board graphics. So I do that and boot into the LiveUSB, do the install, boot into the desktop, install the nVidia drivers package, shut down.
I reinstall the card, turn the computer on... and nothing. Just a black screen with a flashing underline. I can't even get into a TTY session.
I ended up trying a few other distributions--Gecko Linux, Arch Labs, Manjaro--but all had the same issue. I was about to give up, but decided to try Antergos one more time, but with the newest install media.
And it worked! I was so freaking happy! I can finally play my Linux games again!1
Let me introduce you to sys. admin + network admin + teacher at our school... She gave us "materials" to study for our school-leaving exams (called matura here - wiki that shit) so I looked at it and just had to comment everything that's wrong (and that's only the first paragraph)...
Apart from making utterly useless documents she also likes to think she is the best in the world and what she says is right and everyone is wrong. Networks that she builds crash 8 times a month, she can't install proper drivers and believes that open source and GNU/Linux is evil. (She also lives by herself, is around 48 years old, is a lesbian(not that it is a bad thing - just for context) and got one brilliant teacher who actually knew what she was saying and doing fired because she broke up with her)
Thinking about it - no wonder my classmates are all so confused and stressed... she can't teach and says bullshit like printers work with the RGB color space and when confronted she would shout that there are no printers that use CMYK, she has never seen one so they do not exist. (only to proceed changing CMYK ink cartridges in the printer)... I mean it's good for me because I get to teach pretty girls programming and informatics but I am sorry for the boys... Unfortunately I don't have the patience to teach someone programming and informatics unless they are a girl and I see a chance to evaluate that person's qualities to be a girlfriend.7
We've been using private GitHub repos as a distribution method for our personal npm packages at work for years.
I finally got sick of it and did the work to publish them to artifactory yesterday. Today, I worked out the remaining kinks, fixed the CI builds, and wrote a wiki page explaining the change with step by step migration instructions and sent it around to the rest of the devs. And it's working great!
I feel simultaneously like a hero for finally getting this fixed and an idiot for putting up with it for so long.
Also thankful for my devops friend who helped a bunch.1
It was the worst local Hackathon. It's not even a Hackathon either, where the whole event spanned over 2 months.
It was a group entry with me and 4 teammates. Each of them did contribute:
Guy A: criticizes what is built and designed
Guy B: offered financial tips on how to make this thing feasible
Guy C: did UI but in graphics. No CSS file, just bits of graphical elements.
Guy D: family commitments
And then there's me, writing documentation, built the entire project, wiki, drove the project, prepared the presentation slides, tests the framework, unit tests, stuck with stupid problems like SSL, localhost, Google Maps Key and the likes.
And we didn't even win, let alone launch this thing, whatever it is, to anywhere. Never doing group projects again.
I'm flying solo for now
Am I the only one that keeps mistyping & mispronouncing Magneto when I mean Magento?
Can't count how many times I've scratched my head because I got search results pointing at Sabayon Linux's wiki when enquiring about it...1
You wanna know if you are a real developer?
Google "string" and see if you get as first result underwear or not.
Try "DD" and see if you get again some underwear results or a ubuntu wiki article about "the great data destroyer" ;)3
Got my first job after graduation for my Java skills. I was told to learn Hybris from its wiki. I gave it my best and worked very hard.
Two months later, manager tells me to forget about Hybris and puts me in a team with two idiots in a new . Net project.
Worked non stop and and single-handedly brought the new project to completion with . Net, bootstrap, jQuery etc.
Again the manager tells me that they need people in integration team and i have to learn Apigee and Informatica.
The thing i regret most is leaving my beautiful code in the hands of those two idiots that will definitely shit all over it.
In case you're wondering, I don't work for a start up, my company is worth US$ 99.64 billion.2
Previous Post: https://devrant.com/rants/1557094/...
Holy Lamas! The fucked up SharePoint Saga continues.
Lick my glory Cucumber!
2 Weeks ago, Project Department Boss:
We will put a hold to the SharePoint development. Our Proof of Concept failed, even free opensource Software provides more functions.
Me: Alright, I just told you that from the beginning, but this were two great months wasted. In this time I had more important Stuff to do. But thanks that your four workers are overpayd and do batshit, GREAT.
Meeting last week, Project Dep. Head:
We will continue the SharePoint development. We will migrate all of our Data, even if it has a lot of flaws.
We will use OneNote as Wiki.
Me thinking: That's it, we are doomed!! I will suck my own Cucumber sideways... Please just once care about the People using this Software. Why do you say I am the most crucial guy for this project and then give a fuck about my ideas?!🤬
No they only care for the payslip and the promotions, even if the Software is a Clusterfuck😭.
I wont stand if you start using over 200 OneNote Documents!! This decision will drive us straight Bollocks in to the wall. That would be data Terrorism 2.0 🤬
Honestly I will either start give a fuck and plan out my own tool or give up entirely. But I can't my superior is such a nice person and has the wish for a great tool 😥. She even appointed me to this position, because I'm more tech savy than her.
Next week I will have some talks, this cant go on. Burning Millions of Dollars for years and just presenting shit. I never had dreamed, that I would be involved in such shit 🤦🏻♂️
If I start to dev myself, I will do it private beside my job, write up all my hours and get them payd out as a dev and not as a Supporter (Yea my position is IT-Supporter). That would be 180 $ per Hour.
Then I will show the fuckfaces how it's done. This was also suggested by my superiour, she's really a great person ❤️1
So I just spent all morning struggling setting up a project and getting it to run. My colleague sent me a screenshot of the documentation wiki, but didn't give the link.
*4 hours later looks at email for the Nth time*
Wait he did... that's not a wiki, that's Readme.md... this is in the repo link right above it!
I didn't need to checkout the repo so didn't open it...
Was wondering what kind of workflow you use.
My team is currently a big unorganized chaos...
Our manager wants us to take the form of:
Feature idea -> Design -> Build -> Test -> Train (explain to users how to use it) -> Deploy
The `Train` step is something rather odd to me, as that would mean teaching every single employee how to use the product we're making.
Wouldn't it just be better to skip the `train` section (and maybe use some kind of wiki?) and try to make everything as clearly labeled and obvious as possible?6
I do not understand why you guys complains about Stackoverflow or even Arch linux forum. (There's a plenty of rant about those topic)
Those are just amazing, and of course, they will send you to the doc or downvote if you don't even do your job properly. I mean docs, google, other answer, wiki, tutorial, idk. There a plenty of resources where you actually can understand where's your problem. If after this you still don't have your answer, then ok ask it to the community because that why they exist.
But they aren't here just for repeating the answer that already exist and create double post, etc. Stackoverflow is one of the best source when you search on google because it's actually moderated nicely and guys won't hesitate to downvote you.
So if you got downvoted (Like I got sometime) then just think why was yours question/answer bad instead of just being angry against the community.
Ps: It's my first rant, but I was reading you guys since 1 year.4
Spends 9 months on the side developing a library for analysis of a specific programming language. No help, entirely my own work. There's various tools built upon this library. Incorporates project management, an effective build system capable of parallel and distributed builds, a packaging system...
Beta release the library. Wait four months. Ask the community for who's been using it so I can get feedback and other comments. Majority of the comments follow a specific pattern.
"You don't support X, how dare you!?"
One, this is free software, pay me if you want specific things.
Two, I'm the only developer of a project usually undertaken by a small team.
Three, yes it does you fucking invalid... Every fucking time someone claims it doesn't support some feature, it's something I've already written and validated. I swear to fucking God users can't find something themselves and instead of checking the Wiki or asking for help, they blindly assume they can't make mistakes and it must be my defect.1
Hi guys! I feel like i am a lot of topic here😅 But i am looking for some advice. Next year i am an graduate, and in Norway that means PARTYING STRAIGHT THROUGH MAY. It is called a "russefeiring": https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...
Anyway, i am in a group of 6 "russ"es, and we are aiming to get a car for this celebration. Actually there are two "devs" other than me in the group, although they swear by Lua, and only Lua. Besides the point... I am looking for tips on where to get sponsors, because we need some money to fund this car. There are none of us in the group that have parents able to provide us money, and it has become harder over the years to get local business to sponsor the "russ", as they are focusing more on other other groups (which is understandable).
Does anyone know of some company or something that could be interested in making a deal with some Norwegian "russ"? I don't really have good ideas for what we could do for them, only like, logos on the car/clothes and stuff. But we are open to the most freakish suggestions!3
TIL DELL Server from 2018 use a 20 Year old GPU cause its reliable. I did honestly not knew this.
So we're using Jira Wiki for all the documentation related work. It's hell rich with features as they describe. But for me easiest way is to write doc on markdown and then copy paste on Wiki. Highlights code, format tables and aligns paras perfectly.2
When you think you invented something, but someone did that already: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...5
Is there any alternatives to Atlassian's Confluence and Jira?
We used to use GitHub projects and wiki, but "the business" wanted a more formalised process and access controls on kanban boards and backlogs.
We started using Jira and Confluence last month, but Jira have been incredibly slow with a horrible interface also Everytime I create a new issue it feels like I'm wasting a lot of time compared to the time needed to setup an issue on GH and add it to a project board, plus the entire team is used to using markdown which doesn't work great on Jira.
I've looked for some alternative but I wonder what you are using out there!5
It is ok to fail and commit mistakes, that's part of the game, specially for beginner devs. Just avoid failing alone, the most you can!
- Ask people to review your code before pushing to the source repository.
- If you are not sure how to do, ask.
- Never work in production environments without supervision. Pair with someone.
- Have a desk mate for rubberducking (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...) and blame it in case you need
Linux, you never fail to amaze me!
Started using Arch based Manjaro with xfce de couple of months ago. Everything was mostly fine even though I've never used anything that was based on Arch but it had a learning curve.
Couple of weeks ago I couldn't update my packages, I thought it would fix it by itself but I was wrong as you already probably know.
So yesterday I tried to manually fix it. Famous last words. After a lot of googling, trying some terminal commands - and failing, I see a warning labek on some text on the arch wiki - sudo pacman -Syi --force. I said fuck it and did it. Let's see if it works, I try to install a package, I mistype the name, press backspace - it puts a space instead of deleting?!?!?
I tried restarting, googling - nothing...
Guess I'll switch back to Debian based OSes.5
I once worked on a project with 3 specification documents; a word document with numbered points describing every feature inadequately, a UI specification with mocked up screenshots in a badly-versioned wiki, and a user manual which had already been produced by an overzealous marketing department.
Of course they all contradicted each other :D
When you use CMD+Space on your Mac to open an application, and it looks it up on Wikipedia instead.
Literally just did this. I went to open Synergy(While typing a different post on dev rant) and instead it opened the wiki link for "Synergy"2
Just got a pack of 50 ULN2003A (for 4€).
I want to do a led matrix with them... But can't find tutorials online, help?2
Writing documentation is one of those tasks that most developers don't like doing. Especially when it comes to writing in say a Word/PDF file, an online wiki, or Confluence. It's time consuming and a pain in the ass.
But even if you don't like it, at least write comments in your source code! I hate having to keep writing "Write the PHPDocs for this class/function" in every pull request that I review. It's wasting my time writing such comments when it's such a basic thing to do when writing source code.1
Long post, TLDR: Given a large team building large enterprise apps with many parts (mini-projects/processes), how do you reduce the bus-factor and the # of Brent's (Phoenix Project)?
# The detailed version #
We have a lot of people making changes, building in new processes to support new flows or changes in the requirements and data.
But we also have to support these except when it gets into Production there is little information to quickly understand:
- how it works
- what it does/supposed to do
- what the inputs and dependencies are
So often times, if there's an issue, I have to reverse engineer whatever logic I can find out of a huge mess.
I guess the saying goes: the only people that know how it works is whoever wrote it and God.
I'm a senior dev but i spend a lot of time digging thru source code and PROD issues to figure out why ... is broken and how to maybe fix it.
I think in Agile there's supposed to be artifacts during development but never seen em.
Personally whenever i work on a new project, I write down notes and create design diagrams so i can confirm things and have easy to use references while working.
I don't think anyone else does that. And afterwards, I don't have anywhere to put it/share it. There is no central repo for this stuff other than our Wiki but for the most part, is like a dumping ground. You have to dig for information and hoping there's something useful.
And when people leave, information is lost forever and well... we hire a lot of monkeys... so again I feel a lot of times i m trying to recover information from a corrupted hard drive...
The only way real information is transferred is thru word of mouth, special knowledge transfer sessions.
Ideally I would like anything that goes into PROD to have design docs as well as usage instructions in order for anyone to be able to quickly pick it up as needed but I'm not sure if that's realistic.
Even unit tests don't seem to help much as they just test specific functions but don't give much detail about how a whole process is supposed to work.9
I wrote my first lines of basic on a Robotron KC 87 as part of a coding course in school. Fuck, I'm old. 😔 https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/...3
Let me tell you about my wonderful weekend. It all started with a game that doesn't run in wine and it ended up in the biggest nightmare of Windows Update and EFI configuration.
1 - let's boot on my Windows partition to play trackmania 2.
2 - Windows Update interrupts me while driving a track.
3 - Update keep failing over and over again.
4 - I keep trying things to fix Windows Update, but with no success.
5 - Let's try system restore, failed
6 - Let's try to do a reset. "You don't have a recovery drive". Oh, right...
7 - Let's try to upgrade Windows 10 to Windows 10, just because. Nope, "we could not determine if your pc can run Windows 10". Wait what....
8 - I guess I'll be reinstalling this trash. "Nope, can't. Don't like that partition I just formatted". Of course you can't...
9 - Had to delete the partition and let it create new ones. It created a new EFI partition. Just why???
10 - Okay that worked. Let's fix grub now.
11 - Maybe not, let's try rEFInd, because it looks fancy.
12 - After rebooting on the live USB for about 50 times and reconfiguring rEFInd without any luck, I realised the install script didn't install fs drivers for ext4. Oh, right... That's why you didn't find any Linux kernel...
13 - It can't boot windows, they're using a different EFI partition. Let's move rEFInd to the new EFI partition windows created for me.
14 - Finally everything works again. So much effort to play a freaking game without being bothered by windows update. And rEFInd abience theme looks beautiful.
I've got to say though, I learned a lot and the Arch wiki is awesome!6
I heard a rumour that India's government is planning to make COW as the official programming language.
What a time to me alive! /s2
For those who don't know this fantastic programming chrestomathy: http://rosettacode.org/wiki/...
Simply search your programmatic problemand get solutions (plenty of languages). Enjoy!
Well I really gotta ask now!
I am Really interested in building CyanogenMod from scratch for my currently unsupported device but I'm overwhelmed by the wiki of CM. Does anyone has an idea where to start? There only a hand full of devs for my device and I want to help. 😥
When I made a PoC xss thingy.
So this webapp (which I was locally hosting) had a message functionality that allowed iframes to be sent through, but they could only originate from a specific domain. They used a bad regex tho, as the workaround was on an OWASP wiki page, which was the third search result for 'XSS'. I then used this iframe to load in a different page on this app where I could inject js in the title field. Then I discovered this field has a length limit, but I could just fit in a script that would base64 decode the hash part of the URL and eval it. I then updated the iframe to include a script that would automatically change the message signature of anyone who loaded it to include the iframe again in their message signature. Because these two pages were from the same domain, I had gained full control of the messaging app too, allowing me to do this and circumvent the csrf system.
I felt like I had achieved something.
Any service designer here?
I have some questions, to you the most badass designers of all. 😎
for those who don't know what service design is yet. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...2
I wanted to explore the devRant API. But couldn't find any resource. I know it's unofficial but there has to be a minimal wiki with the endpoints available right? Could someone point me to it?4
Form plugin for WordPress on a seriously out of date install won't update until I update WordPress core. Fine, I update core and update the plugin and test the forms again. Form still isn't sending emails on submission. Look into forms settings. Oh look error messages, awesome!
Message: "There are 2 configuration errors"
OK, what are the errors where are the errors?
"There are two configuration errors."
Gee that's really fucking helpful, why even tell me you can see the errors if you aren't going to fucking tell me where the blasted things are. Spend 4 fucking hours trying to figure this out, checking "docs" wiki, support forums, nothing.
Finally decided to just trash the client's form plugin they were using and installed my reliable Gravity Forms.
P.S. if you are going to write code to find errors, and tell me about them, then you had better fucking tell me what the goddamned error is. There is no need to waste a developer's time trying to debug your shitty plugin because you couldn't be bothered to write a useful error handler.
What do you drink while you're programming?
Don't say "coffee, energy drinks", post the model/type.
I'm from Spain, and usually I drink this: http://coffee.wikia.com/wiki/...29
Ok... Able to pry myself away from fallout 76 and fire up for some programming...
Van't decide whether I want to build my game engines debug and root dev tools how I thought, thinking of building the engine to almost behave like a VM but not quite, it still is compiled just like a normal game but has a built in developer terminal that actually acts like an extra operating system/BIOS that can be left to boot the games assets and everything like you would have for an end user or the startup can be interupted to initialise the terminal prior to everything being loaded...
Following the osdev Wiki tutorials to actually build the dev terminal itself but just unsure whether or not to impliment this system the way I think or not... Opinions?1
When I was a kid I was looking around google for viruses/trojans/lamer stuff (yes, I wanted to be a H4ck3r at 12 yo, lol).
At a certain point I read "Oh, these lamers. Learn how to program instead of looking for ready-made stuff".
That word, "program", sounded in my head until I googled it.
So, my journey began from there.
Never attribute to malice what can be explained by incompetence.
One year ago I made a resolution to do one of two things: get serious about learning neural networks, or finish one of the side projects (markdown based wiki with some nifty features). Didn't do the first one, and got the second one to about 50%.
Not really happy as I did not complete any goal. Still some decent work was done and built an open source parser. So, I guess I am 50% happy.
What were your achievements this year? Did you achieve 100%?3
just read about Zeno's paradox and realized, this is our life!!
The client sets requirements, we code them within n time. by the time we finish it, the client sets new requirements. so we code them again, but by the time we finish it, more requirements are set.
will we ever be able to finish it all? that is the paradox.
36 Tb Of Cloud storage?
was browsing on Cloud storage and found this Pearl...
Virtually unlimited storage.
I know It's a Chinese service (so privacy = null) but to place huge files...
Who knows or uses this service that can provide us with some info?
How have I not known about brace completion for vim this long?! I’m so happy yet feel so dumb #LifeOfaDeveloper
Fellow devs, I'm looking for a CMS which has markdown support and allows authorized entry.
Basically we are working with some clients on some IP. We want to convey what we have worked up via a website. But we want the access to be regulated.
We are currently using wiki to maintain the information.
What are my alternatives?14
Confluence WYSIWYG-editor shall burn in a thousand hells. This thing pretends to be smart, yet all its autoformatting achieves is to enrage me. I don't remember dropping so many f-bombs in such a short time frame.
I hoped to ease to the pain by writing markdown, yet I can only write markdown in a new insert markup window which does not even comprehend nested lists. And don't get me started that it wants to push its Confluence Wiki syntax first. Why does it need to reinvent the wheel?
Why can't I disable the WYSIWYG feel of it and just write plain old markdown?
Confluence, you are part of the problem!
I rather keep the documetnation inside the git repostory inside of md files. But no, confluence shall be our source of soon to be outdated documentation.
I've been trying to work with net SNMP, and I can't seem to send traps to managers.
I've opened the ports, and it seems I need to edit the conf and add the appropriate trap community. I have tried that, but it just gives a warning of unknown definition. Ive tried to follow the stuff on the wiki but it just gives the same error.
Curious about the feedback I'll get from everyone here.
We are looking for a email replacement like slack that may also have a wiki component. So far Quip is at the top I think.
Also the idea of cross platform development is being floated and I've been looking at Xamarin and QT.
Does anybody work with these or similar solutions?3
Anybody got good source of how to install Arch Linux alongside with Windows? Cause arch wiki is killing me.20
I have been tired of everything for a couple of years and thought it is temporary and it will go away. But today I discovered there is a thing called Chronic fatigue syndrome.
Fellow developers, if you are experiencing similar symptoms mentioned in the wiki, make sure you visit a doctor; trust me, this permanent state of fatigue will not go away.
I just made an appointment to doctor and urge you to do the same!1
Copied from Plataformatec/Devise OSS project issue
"Right, I was following the wiki. I don't know how, but it magically started working. Not sure what did it, but it's working now! Thanks."
We know his struggle!
Fuck fucking Xcode that keeps closing the simulator every time I try to debug my app!!! Xcode developers, please refer here:
Client purchases platform from large tech company. Needs to be able to add custom CSS and JS. Spend weeks combing through sites looking for documentation. Compile my own from my own trial and error, a half ass wiki, and forums.
Client's platform is years out of date.
Anybody worked with FlexibleAdapter library? Its one of the best libraries for cool recycler view features but its wiki/demoapp is so complex that its 8 hours & i can't seem to understand a shit :/
I *hate* cmd+z in Atlassian Wikis… it removes text that was written ages ago… and you never get it back… no matter how many times you press cmd+shift+z or cmd+y… 😡
"I'm a liar."
Supposing I tell the truth, I'm not a liar. But that would mean that I am a liar, since I said that I am a liar.
Assuming I did not tell the truth, I would be a liar. But since I said the truth, I would not be a liar.
If one starts from the classical logic, one can make no logical statement. If one starts from the three-valued logic, I would say that "unknown" (u, ½
Is that true, what do you mean?
"Ich bin ein Lügner."
Angenommen, ich würde die Wahrheit sagen, bin ich keine Lügner. Dies würde aber bedeuten dass ich ein Lügner bin, da ich ja gesagt habe dass ich ein Lügner bin.
Angenommen ich würde nicht die Wahrheit sagen, wäre ich ein Lügner. Aber da ich die Wahrheit gesagt habe wäre ich kein Lügner.
Wenn man von der klassischen logik ausgeht, kann man keine logische Aussage machen. Wenn man von der Dreiwertige Logik ausgeht, würde ich sagen, das "unbekannt"(u, ½) rauskommt.
Stimmt das, was meinst du?
If only the people behind git knew about Leonardo da Vinci's "Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication". Even https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/... would have suficed. Sigh. Well, job security is not bad either.2