Passed my AWS Certified Solutions Architect Associate with 919/1000! 🎉

Easy:
Everyone (or basically everyone) else is an NPC and is therefore irrelevant. Their opinions do not matter.

Where you get the Code

Companies can't use free software?

Well, I just forced everyone to use Nextcloud instead of Dropbox and Google Drive. People did not like it as first but the quickly realized how good it was.

We also moved from skype, teams and slack to matrix.
I am glad that matrix-synapse is so easy to install nowadays!

code review

(•_•)
<) )╯i
/ \

\(•_•)
( (> got
/ \

(•_•)
<) )> promoted
/ \

Minimum punishment it is

And on Fridays we all say together...

✨
✨ DON'T ✨
✨
✨ PUSH ✨
✨ ✨
✨ TO ✨
✨
✨ PRODUCTION ✨
✨
✨

Production ready

I'm planning to put this comment somewhere in our code for the future developers to see.
/**
لقد اتخذت القرار الخاطئ بالتقدم إلى هذه الشركة. اترك الآن قبل فوات الأوان. أنا المطور السابق وحياتي أصبحت بائسة. البيروقراطية ، السياسة ، تأخر الرواتب ، عدم الابتكار. أسوأ رمز رأيته حتى الآن.
**/

Edit: Too late, I already did. git commit . git push

Time to update my CV :) any job openings you can recommend?

"A different error message! Finally some progress!"

How to get these swags?
How many do you possess?

~During app demo to our client~

- And when you click here the request will be submitted, the admin will be notified.
*App crashes*
- And of course the app will close itself since it's the end of the process.
- Client: That's good
- Me: ⊙﹏⊙

I didn’t want to wait for the adapter to come in…

No, thank you.😆

How to install vim in Linux:
1. Download gvim80.exe
2. Install Wine
3. wine gvim80.exe
( Follow installation instructions. Keep on
clicking next)
4. Download DosBox.exe
5. wine DosBox.exe
6. MOUNT F /path/to/wine/vim
(Mount vim installation directory)
7. vim.exe
8. Enjoy the latest vim :)

Let's Encrypt and their free (wildcard) certificates. Simply great!

Buzzword dictionary to deal with annoying clients:

AI—regression
Big data—data
Blockchain—database
Algorithm—automated decision-making
Cloud—Internet
Crypto—cryptocurrency
Dark web—Onion service
Data science—statistics done by nonstatisticians
Disruption—competition
Viral—popular
IoT—malware-ready device

I just saw a website that hid the login and sign up buttons while ad block was enabled. No popups or anything asking me to disable the ad block.

Well played developer, well played.

Oh.. So the deadline is tomorrow? How about we schedule a fucking FOUR HOUR meeting to speed things up?

Yeah, fuck you too...

Client : pls put the disclaimer that the site uses cookies.
Me: but we don't use cookies this is a static page
Client: Still, the pop up makes the site look more professional, kindly add the feature asap
Me: :/

My shower renders temperature as a boolean. 😩

Me: "Delete this file."
Windows: "Someone is using it."
Me: "Who?"
Windows: "I can't say."
Me: "I checked using a utility. It says your file explorer is the one using it!"
Windows: "Well, I had to show a preview."
Me: "Why?"
Windows: "Because you selected the file to delete it!"

Credit: https://twitter.com/cmuratori/...

Yesterday, my employer promoted me to lead web developer.

I’m still the only web developer.

Dev: Microsoft is shit

VS Code: (ಥ⌣ಥ)

Dev: Oh not you dear! You're not like the other guys

VS Code: (｡◕‿◕｡)

$ cd /my_life
$ cd /every_day
$ ls
pain suffering programming

Google => googled

Duck duck go => duck duck went?

🤔

Wtf!
This is the github version of "Nothing" android app. 😑

I will suicide bomb to kill WordPress.

Someone on the IP 127.0.0.1 has been creating a lot of bugs in my code, please beware of you notice any connections from that address.