I know it's been said in a comic before but..

The power to punch people over standard TCP/IP

I think I just invented a thing.

Mouse drop.

It should be a thing.

The next time I switch jobs I'll definitely do a mouse drop before I leave the building.

When I was younger I would start ironing a shirt poorly knowing full-well my mother would see me doing it badly and take over to do it properly.

Karma is a bitch. Now my colleagues ask me over for help and I normally end up taking over control of their pc to rewrite shit. I swear they do it on purpose.

There comes a moment in every developer's life when he thinks about reading Design Patterns (GOF).

Friend: "What is devRant?"
Me: "A place where programmers tell jokes and complain."
Friend: "Why dont you just do that irl?"
Me: "Because we never test in production"

Just got this slack from our server admin.

Privacy is a legend

Loneliness

!rant
If you would have to stick with one language for your entire life which language would it be?

YYYY-DD-MM H:i:S

My younger brother let my HDD fall down to test how hard it is.
-But you said HDD stands for Hard Drive... right ?

Stupid annoying client want me to add 2 new fields on a form. Ok I said, my estimation is that I need 2 days to make the changes on form, database and all the scripts that posting and getting data, plus testing. His reply was, come one do you really want 48 hours to just add 2 fields, its sooo easy!!!! WTF dude... if it is sooo easy why are you fucking bother me??? Do it your self!!!!

I'm really hating society today. If this offends you; good.

coworker: what's your address?
me: 173.168.15.10
coworker: no, your local address
me: 127.0.0.1
coworker: no, your physical address
me: 29:01:38:62:31:58
coworker: ...........

Brain, it's 5 a.m. ! Stop ✋ ! Please I need to sleep

!rant

Developers aren't just resources that you "utilize".

We are human beings with thoughts, aspirations, creativity, hopes and fears.

Your position doesn't make you entitled to treat others less.

Story of everyday when you are bored with your job and in life

I feel so overwhelmed. I feel like I'm never going to actually learn everything about programming. I feel like I'm just going to learn some new API every time I want to do some thing. I feel like I'll lose the ability to do basic programming. I feel like I need a cup of coffee.

I find it way easier to read code than ordinary text.

Am I the only one? Do I have a problem?
After the first sentence my I eyes can't focus to keep reading text. This also happens to my native language except from English.

One picture to rule them all

Watching normal people use a computer is incredibly painful.
* slow typing
* slow mouse movements
* mouse is used for everything
* instead of hitting the back button, they'll load up a website and go through 6 pages again.
* no shortcuts!

Someone lost their tabs today (Windows crashed), so I said "press ctrl + shift + T". They were so amazed that keys could do something so advanced.
Dhcosncowhtoehwurt hrnxkxxhry he.

Honestly, if people learned how to use keyboards to their full potential, they could shave off 1-2 hours of their normal work PER DAY!

A few years ago when I was still an apple fan boy, friend of mine bragging me about how android is awesome, we were drinking some shots at our local pub and I was starting to get light headed. At one point he showed me so called "terminal emulator" app. I checked it out, and assumed it's an emulation, just like dosbox, so I decided to verify that "rm -rf *"... (the phone was rooted)

The phone shutdown within seconds, I couldn't stop laughing, while my friend was shock that his new phone was longer booting.

Luckily he managed to reflash the ROM. What can I learn from that experience?
1. Don't drink and sudo
2. Don't call your app an emulator if it's the real deal.

I would love a small devRant sticker. So small that I can place him over the cam of my laptop.

Am I the only one that seems to lose the capacity to type when a person comes next to me and starts looking at my screen? It's so frustrating.

When you build a website with full CMS and you end up taking care of the content because your client "just can't be bothered"...

Inside Linux

Who killed MySQL?

!rant

This situation, when you are working as external employee in a company that needs you to test safety-critical systems.

You wait months for "THE" (internal) test tool you have to use to implement your specified tests.

Finally , you meet with the responsible dev guy to let him setup everything.

Me: Hi, I'm here for setting up the test tool for project XY
Dev: Eh? No one (manger) ordered the tool for project XY!
Me:

My GF said I look so silent and innocent while working. She has no idea how much I curse the monitor in my head while working.

Straight to the brain