Details
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Aboutlove computers and security stuffs
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Skillspython, django
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Locationiran
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Github
Joined devRant on 6/18/2016
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Just do it!™️
For real.
Thinking about writing an app? just do it!
Thinking about creating a website? Just do it!
Thinking about the game? You just lost!6 -
1. The quality of the coffee and toilet paper you encounter during an interview tells you more than promises about table tennis or fruit baskets.
2. Try to determine who their primary client is: subscribers, app buyers, advertisers, etc. It's a major influence on the company dynamic.
3. Before an interview, you can just say: "I would like to sit down with a PO and run through one backlog feature and one bug, to get a feel for the type of tasks at the company". Such an activity immediately reveals team structure, whether they have product owners & scrum masters, what a sprint looks like, how they prioritize tasks, and how organized/chaotic your work experience will be.16 -
Windows: everything is proprietary and inconsistent
Mac: everything is expensive
Linux: everything is a text file12 -
Me: *Watching a movie*
Main Character: "Oh no, we have to hack the CIA to figure out how this machine works! Hacker girl, do the stuff"
Hacker Girl: "Consider it done!"
Hacker Girl: *Opens Linux bash*
Hacker Girl: *types 'mkdir Hack_CIA'
Hacker Girl: "They have two-factor authentication in place, this is going to be a hard one."
Hacker Girl: *Types 'cd Hack_CIA'*
Hacker Girl: "I'm in!"
Me: "..."
Friend: "Wow, so well done, so realistic!"
Me: *Dies*82 -
Programming in a tree. I usually climb up here and read, but I decided to code, and I didn't drop my laptop :D
I covered the screen with my hand because my code's ugly, and I don't want anyone to see it lol.144 -
Our dev team got a new manager. On our first face 2 face meeting:
Manager: So, what technology are we using for web apps?
Me: TypeScript.
Manager: What is TypeScript?
Me: It's a superset of JavaScript.
Manager: Oh I know JavaScript, it's the latest version of Java, right?
Me thinking: He is joking. He tries to be the fun guy. Everyone knows the Java-JavaScript, ham-hamster joke.
Me later, also thinking: No he is not joking. Oh God, this is the end. We are all f*cked!8 -
"Don't give your 100%. Never. Once you gave, managers will start expecting more than that." - My mentor.16
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I shall not be limited by the boundaries that they have defined for me! I shall break free from these chains and transcend my internal barriers!
I shall earn my freedom!
-cursor10 -
Overheard a phone call of a collegue:
Person on phone (P): okay so how do I upload the code?
Colleague (C): well you could use filezilla for example
P: oh... okay... yeah.... So how does that work?
C: you said earlier that you were going to hire a more technical person, a developer, to develop this wordpress side, maybe he/she could help you out with this?
P: I am that developer.
C: 😶😐10 -
4am
"I need to brush my teeth before going to sleep 😵"
*goes to bathroom*
*washes hands*
*goes to bed*
1minute of heavy processing later
"FUCK"7 -
Interviewer: Welcome, Mr X. Thanks for dropping by. We like to keep our interviews informal. And even though I have all the power here, and you are nothing but a cretin, let’s pretend we are going to have fun here.
Mr X: Sure, man, whatever.
I: Let’s start with the technical stuff, shall we? Do you know what a linked list is?
X: (Tells what it is).
I: Great. Can you tell me where linked lists are used?
X:: Sure. In interview questions.
I: What?
X: The only time linked lists come up is in interview questions.
I:: That’s not true. They have lots of real world applications. Like, like…. (fumbles)
X:: Like to implement memory allocation in operating systems. But you don’t sell operating systems, do you?
I:: Well… moving on. Do you know what the Big O notation is?
X: Sure. It’s another thing used only in interviews.
I: What?! Not true at all. What if you want to sort a billion records a minute, like Google has to?
X: But you are not Google, are you? You are hiring me to work with 5 year old PHP code, and most of the tasks will be hacking HTML/CSS. Why don’t you ask me something I will actually be doing?
I: (Getting a bit frustrated) Fine. How would you do FooBar in version X of PHP?
X: I would, er, Google that.
I: And how do you call library ABC in PHP?
X: Google?
I: (shocked) OMG. You mean you don’t remember all the 97 million PHP functions, and have to actually Google stuff? What if the Internet goes down?
X: Does it? We’re in the 1st world, aren’t we?
I: Tut, tut. Kids these days. Anyway,looking at your resume, we need at least 7 years of ReactJS. You don’t have that.
X: That’s great, because React came out last year.
I: Excuses, excuses. Let’s ask some lateral thinking questions. How would you go about finding how many piano tuners there are in San Francisco?
X: 37.
I: What?!
X: 37. I googled before coming here. Also Googled other puzzle questions. You can fit 7,895,345 balls in a Boeing 747. Manholes covers are round because that is the shape that won’t fall in. You ask the guard what the other guard would say. You then take the fox across the bridge first, and eat the chicken. As for how to move Mount Fuji, you tell it a sad story.
I: Ooooooooookkkkkaaaayyyyyyy. Right, tell me a bit about yourself.
X: Everything is there in the resume.
I: I mean other than that. What sort of a person are you? What are your hobbies?
X: Japanese culture.
I: Interesting. What specifically?
X: Hentai.
I: What’s hentai?
X: It’s an televised art form.
I: Ok. Now, can you give me an example of a time when you were really challenged?
X: Well, just the other day, a few pennies from my pocket fell behind the sofa. Took me an hour to take them out. Boy was it challenging.
I: I meant technical challenge.
X: I once spent 10 hours installing Windows 10 on a Mac.
I: Why did you do that?
X: I had nothing better to do.
I: Why did you decide to apply to us?
X: The voices in my head told me.
I: What?
X: You advertised a job, so I applied.
I: And why do you want to change your job?
X: Money, baby!
I: (shocked)
X: I mean, I am looking for more lateral changes in a fast moving cloud connected social media agile web 2.0 company.
I: Great. That’s the answer we were looking for. What do you feel about constant overtime?
X: I don’t know. What do you feel about overtime pay?
I: What is your biggest weakness?
X: Kryptonite. Also, ice cream.
I: What are your salary expectations?
X: A million dollars a year, three months paid vacation on the beach, stock options, the lot. Failing that, whatever you have.
I: Great. Any questions for me?
X: No.
I: No? You are supposed to ask me a question, to impress me with your knowledge. I’ll ask you one. Where do you see yourself in 5 years?
X: Doing your job, minus the stupid questions.
I: Get out. Don’t call us, we’ll call you.
All Credit to:
http://pythonforengineers.com/the-p...89