how anybody could use a light theme is beyond me

it's like staring into the suns butthole

Meanwhile on github...

My "Coding Standards" for my dev team

1.) Every developer thinks or have thought their shit don't stink. If you think you have the best code, submit it to your peers for review. The results may surprise you.

2.) It doesn't matter if you've been working here for a day or ten years. Everyone's input is valuable. I don't care if you're the best damn programmer. If you ever pull rank or seniority on someone who is trying to help, even if it isn't necessarily valid or helpful, please have your resume ready to work elsewhere.

3.) Every language is great and every language sucks in their own ways. We don't have time for a measuring contest. The only time a language debate should arise is for the goal of finding the right one for the project at hand.

4.) Comment your code. We don't have time to investigate what the structure and purpose of your code is when we need to extend upon it.

5.) If you use someone else's work, give them the credit in your comments. Plagiarism will not be tolerated.

6.) If you use flash, you will be taken out back and shot. If you survive, you will be shot again.

7.) If you load jQuery for the sole purpose of writing a simple function, #6 applies.

8.) Unless it is an actual picture, there is little to no reason for not utilizing CSS. That's what it's there for.

9.) We don't support any version of Internet Explorer and Edge other than the latest versions, and only layout/alignment fixes will be bothered with.

10.) If you are struggling with a task, reach out. While you should be able to work independently, it doesn't make sense to waste your time and everyone else's to not seek assistance when needed.

11.) I'm serious about #6 and #7. Don't do it.

Got a phone interview for a backend dev job in an opsec company.

Interviewer:
This is a very serious and prestigious position, we take care of the most important bits of code.

*Proceeds to talk introductory nonsense*

Interviewer:
Do you know what a DNS is?

Me:
Yes, of course! DNS stands for Domain Name System.... Blah blah blah... I explain about the servers, about hosts file, about DNS spoofing and everything else possible on this topic.

Interviewer:
See, I was patient with you - letting you finish. I'm not sure what you're talking about and where you got it from, but a DNS is that line in the browser where you type the site's name.

He didn't ask any more questions, just told me that they'll get back to me. I asked not to do that.

Three weeks later I got an email claiming that I'm not qualified.

Resist the urge to punch some of my co-workers.

New devRant web app for desktop is now live! (https://devrant.com - the .com will now redirect to feed if you are logged in) Let us know what you think, and especially if you spot any bugs (very likely some slipped through). Some cool new features are still in development, will be out shortly.

Even the exit door knows to get your code into source control before you leave.

how good are you at excel....

Vibration settings

I like

Explaining how a mechanical keyboard makes you type faster is like explaining how light-up shoes make you run faster.

They do.

Exactly what I was looking for

Business User [1 PM]: So I know every month you’ve been using your dark magic SQL skills to transform my monthly data into better monthly data.

Well I know it’s the middle of the month, and this is totally random... but... I have some other data formatted totally differently, almost totally different data! You can just run this through your magic SQL Proc right?? Easy! Also, I need this by end of day... thank you for your support.

Me [1:01 PM]: K.

How hard is it for people to understand that rounding individual decimal numbers and adding them is not equal to adding them all and then rounding off.

FFS

When you really hate web development

Looking at open positions, noticed that some of the jobs I've seen a year ago are still looking for an engineer with 2+ years of experience.....
Could of taken anyone and taught him everything you need already..... You had a full year SMH

Once you go 2 displays side by side, you can never go back.

Teaching JavaScript to a master of classical programming (only uses C++, Python, Ruby, etc.). Here are the results:

1. What
2. What the fuck
3. Why
4. Why the fuck
5. Oh shit that's useful
6. Oh shit that's stupid
7. Why would anyone do that
8. Why isn't anyone else doing that
9. This is crazy complex
10. This is stupid easy

Why the fuck isn't there a DevRant coffee mug in the swag store? I am sick and tired of drinking java from a freakkin' plate.

Found this online, it seems MS-Paint is still useful.

I’ve been on devRant for around a year or so but only just signed up. Hello everyone.

Today was my last day at work. It’s time for me to start my own business rather than constantly work for one. I have an idea for an app so we’ll see how that goes.

Wish me luck!

Can't wait to see his face om monday! 😁

When you go to type portal.office.com and pornhub.com appears in the auto fill on a clients computer..

Guess who's not going to work anywhere near frontend.

Both Password and repeat password had the same typo! :(

Deadline is tomorrow. Colleague constantly chatting on Facebook. And he said he'll work from home tomorrow. Am i wrong thinking about ways to smash his head?

When you search one plus 5t..

Lol google

Oh no. CIS Professor pronounces it 'Lie-nux.'

As a student on platforms like these, hearing people talk about languages and concepts you've never heard of

Happiness is :

$ git pull
Auto-merging foo.bar
Merge made by the 'recursive' strategy.
$ _