!rant
A few days ago a friend of mine rang me up complaining about internet issues with his computer. As usual I did the "is it plugged in, turn it off then on again" sort of thing to waste time while my pasta was cooking. After a while he asked if I had another bogus solution, so I suggested flushing his toilet.

He runs off, I hear the flush, comes back and viola - it fucking worked.

The point of this is: if it don't work, flush the toilet. You're welcome, tech support out ✌️

That moment when you've been sat on the toilet reading devRant so long that your legs have gone dead so when you try to stand up you faceplant the opposite wall :-/

devRant is bad for my health !

EDIT: what's more embarrassing is I lay on the floor writing this rant.

Paypal Rant #3

One day I'll go to Paypal HQ and...
... change all the toilet rolls to face the wrong way
... remap all the semicolons to be the Greek equivalent character
... change all the door signs so they say "pull" instead of "push" and vice versa
... modify all the stairs to have variable heights
... programmatically shuffle the elevator buttons and randomly assign the alarm key to any of the most visited floors
... pour cocoa onto all the keyboards and wipe them off cleanly
... attach clear duct tape over their mouse sensors and insert really weak batteries or mess with their cables

I'll wait a day or two until they experience a sudden shortage of developers, then bombard them with thousands of fake applications from seemingly amazing candidates, then write an AI bot to continue argumentation with HR.

I'll wait another week or so until the company dissolves and with them, all my issues in life.

No need to be overly vulgar this time because you all know the deal. I hate this fucking company. Please Paypal do us all a favor and go fuck yourself.

!rant

I love the fact that some programmers will put there heart and soul into a project and spend there entire life working on it to only have no recognition or earn a single cent.

Yet the man who invented toilet paper literally wiped his ass and made millions...

I love how the world works! :-D

College can be one of the worst investments for an IT career ever.

I've been in university for the past 3 years and my views on higher education have radically changed from positive to mostly cynical.

This is an extremely polarizing topic, some say "your college is shite", "#notall", "you complain too much", and to all of you I am glad you are happy with your expensive toilet paper and feel like your dick just grew an inch longer, what I'll be talking about is my personal experience and you may make of it what you wish. I'm not addressing the best ivy-league Unis those are a whole other topic, I'll talk about average Unis for average Joes like me.

Higher education has been the golden ticket for countless generations, you know it, your parents believe in it and your grandparents lived it. But things are not like they used to be, higher education is a failing business model that will soon burst, it used to be simple, good grades + good college + nice title = happy life.

Sounds good? Well fuck you because the career paths that still work like that are limited, like less than 4.

The above is specially true in IT where shit moves so fast and furious if you get distracted for just a second you get Paul Walkered out of the Valley; companies don't want you to serve your best anymore, they want grunt work for the most part and grunts with inferiority complex to manage those grunts and ship the rest to India (or Mexico) at best startups hire the best problem solvers they can get because they need quality rather than quantity.

Does Uni prepare you for that? Well...no, the industry changes so much they can't even follow up on what it requires and ends up creating lousy study programs then tells you to invest $200k+ in "your future" for you to sweat your ass off on unproductive tasks to then get out and be struck by jobs that ask for knowledge you hadn't even heard off.

Remember those nights you wasted drawing ER diagrams while that other shmuck followed tutorials on react? Well he's your boss now, but don't worry you will wear your tired eyes, caffeine saturated breath and overweight with pride while holding your empty title, don't get me wrong I've indulged in some rough play too but I have noticed that 3 months giving a project my heart and soul teaches me more than 6 months of painstakingly pleasing professors with big egos.

And the soon to be graduates, my God...you have the ones that are there for the lulz, the nerds that beat their ass off to sustain a scholarship they'll have to pay back with interests and the ones that just hope for the best. The last two of the list are the ones I really feel bad for, the nerds will beat themselves over and over to comply with teacher demands not noticing they are about to graduate still versioning on .zip and drive, the latter feel something's wrong but they have no chances if there isn't a teacher to mentor them.

And what pisses me off even more is the typical answers to these issues "you NEED the title" and "you need to be self taught". First of all bitch how many times have we heard, seen and experienced the rejection for being overqualified? The market is saturated with titles, so much so they have become meaningless, IT companies now hire on an experience, economical and likeability basis. Worse, you tell me I need to be self taught, fucker I've been self taught for years why would I travel 10km a day for you to give me 0 new insights, slacking in my face or do what my dog does when I program (stare at me) and that's just on the days you decide to attend!

But not everything is bad, college does give you three things: networking, some good teachers and expensive dead tree remnants, is it worth the price tag, not really, not if you don't need it.

My broken family is not one of resources and even tho I had an 80% scholarship at the second best uni of my country I decided I didn't need the 10+ year debt for not sleeping 4 years, I decided to go to the 3rd in the list which is state funded; as for that decision it worked out as I'm paying most of everything now and through my BS I've noticed all of the above, I've visited 4 universities in my country and 4 abroad and even tho they have better everything abroad it still doesn't justify some of the prices.

If you don't feel like I do and you are happy, I'm happy for you. My rant is about my personal experience which is kind of in the context of IT higher education in the last ~8 years.

Just letting some steam off and not regretting most of my decisions.

!rant

Finally back to coding at the new office. Better connection speed. Wider space. Own toilet.

Guess you won't see new posts from me anytime soon.
Just gonna enjoy the rest of your miseries from my chilled desk.

😎

This one isn't so much a rant but a short story about how small the world is.

Basically, I am a college student and I've fallen into the "Thinkpad Hipster" Group, more specifically the guy who runs Linux ( Arch, in this case ) learns some mostly irrelevant language, in this case Haskell, which while useful isn't really relevant in the modern world.

So this is where the story begins, I am sitting on the train to college and I am reading through a book on Haskell on my X240, so all is fine, when I notice some guy sitting in front of me who looks like an older version of me, I then notice that he's also using a Thinkpad, now I'm curious as to which, because I love the laptops, I see he has an X240 Aswell, oh, sweet, eventually he gets up to go to the toilet and looks over my shoulder at my laptop screen and sees that I'm learning haskell, when he comes back he begins to try and help me, which I was surprised at because so few people would know the language, when he showed me his laptop he was running almost the same setup as me, it was similar to a "Glitch in the Matrix" Moment, I truly didn't expect anyone to be running near the exact same stuff as me, look so similar and also be in the same area as me, that made my day knowing that some people also do the same stuff as me.

26 or so hours up now. And I've got a few stories to tell :) feel free to refresh your cup of coffee and take a seat.

Last few days I've been going into this odd place called intown.irl to get in touch with its inhabitants. An odd place I have to say. But in some cases quite rewarding, even got a MILF home with me and into bed at some point. Anyway...

3 days ago I think it is now? Thursday evening I took my laptop to this local bar where I had this issue about dihydrogen monoxide with one of the bartenders earlier (you'll find that rant on those keywords). Still wanted to visit it regardless though, as I met that first woman there earlier that approached me. Unfortunately I didn't see her there that day.

Some bald guy who was clearly drunk approached me. Many people were already giving curious looks at this laptop I brought to the bar. I finally tuned it up with the stickers from FOSDEM.. I'll put a picture of it in the comments. My theme was one of privacy (central), distributions and Google's open source initiative (which aligns with the keychain token I got from them as well). But of course.. that guy.. he thought that a pimped/riced laptop obviously meant that I was a hacker.

Guy went to the toilet.. went back.. and suddenly grabbed my laptop and turned it towards him. Boy was I never more smugly satisfied that those rubber pads on the bottom are quite resilient. Could've almost damaged my screen by trying to grab it like that. But it's a CCFL display.. so high voltage. If it were to become broken.. worth it. 😈

On it at the time was a terminal, pinging Google (had network issues at that bar, to the point where one of the - I think - staff members got up to me and offered the WiFi password and got to talk with me.. more on that later), and my usual Linux desktop along with the Arch anime wallpaper with the quote of Da Vinci.. simplicity is the ultimate sophistication. Of course the guy saw the terminal.. and probably reaffirmed.. yep, that's a hacker. At least he wasn't too wrong about the general term.. but the hat.. most likely he was wrong on that one.

Guy left with this question.. "you are a hacker, aren't you."
I replied to him: "No sir. I'm not a hacker. I've got no idea what you're talking about."
Guy kept looking at me weirdly for the whole night to come.

Back to that companion guy though. Mac user, yada yada.. but he told me about his backup solution. Apparently - I shit you not - he has not only the photos on his local device, he's also frequently backing them up in Time Machine (which I was really curious about whether it uses mirroring or snapshots.. he couldn't tell, lmk if you do) but not only that.. he was storing another offsite backup in that very bar, in case his house went on fire.

Now that is a proper backup scheme!!! If only more people were like that.

Seriously though.. that bald guy who took my laptop just like that... I just let it slide for that one time, but I tend to treat my machines as an extension of my very self. I think that was a very uncalled for move. Asshole...

How would you have reacted to such a thing? And.. maybe that's why we technologists don't get outside too often? Fucking everything is hacking these days if it's not Knopkes and Blinkenlights… Not every shell is a h4xx0ring console for h3kk1ng de fasbuk…

Just read a comment on rant that stated "You’d be surprised as how disgusting people are especially in the work setting.". In regard to bathrooms. This reads true, for my current place of work

I was about to reply to that, but I thought this is worthy of a rant of its own. Allow me to quote some emails...

"We have had reports of excrement being left on toilet seats, which surely could be seen by the person responsible before they left the cubicle. "

"very poor toilet hygiene in some the ladies toilets.

Firstly, someone person should I say.... has used a toilet brush to clear a blockage in the Ladies loo nearest [removed]. They obviously couldn't unblock the toilet due to the density of the blockage and therefore.. returned the brush to it's holder full of the blockage!! "

"The phantom "snot" wiper is back and is using the back of the toilet door nearest the [removed] as a tissue! Again.. the poor Cleaner has had to clean this up... "

"Toilet paper being put in the Urinal blocking the system in [removed] and faeces being left on the toilet floor in [removed]. This goes without saying that this can't go on and it's not the cleaners job to be cleaning such messes! "

Its ever worse in our other office that contains a call centre. A lady was fired for leaving shit in the stairwells on multiple instances. She had been fired from her last role for the same thing.

There were also reports of subway subs been left in the toilet bowl.

You also find the most curious items in the waste bins (they have no lid, we're not search through them - just to make that clear) everything from half eaten sandwiches to watermelon.

!rant
I've lost all fucking motivation to do anything at the moment.
Fuck not even gaming is much fun anymore.
Also amazing that I have so little time on Mondays that I can't even eat properly.
Literally living on caffeine, a spoonful of, like, porridge and water on Mondays.

And of course the nice bistro is closed on Mondays.
Then there is that motherfucker of person at school that just randomly starts sharing weird ass details with you and promptly started to break out in tears when she failed maths today.

Like fucking hell, then for some reason the same person fucks up everything in her volleyball group by literally doing nothing and complains when she gets hit by a fucking volleyball, like, she doesn't even attempt to dodge it catch it.

So much for that fuckery.

Then there's these little brats that just completely play asshole and are being jackasses to everyone including upperclassmen and teachers.
Grab em by the throat and fucking put them in a toilet.
Literally the reason why our school is generally known as the 'Drecksloch', literally dirt hole.

The fucking volume is driving me batshit insane in school to the point where I just start yelling at people.
Fucking kids, it literally doesn't cost you shit to just shut the fuck up.

Okay, vent over.
Sorry for that.

!rant
Medium long story about POP!_OS

TL;DR : A true K.I.S.S. OS. Very well designed UI. In general suitable for everyone. Any distro-hoppers MUST try out. If your current OS is already heavily customized to your needs, DON'T bother with POP. (Read till the end if you are on toilet, nothing to lose)

Backstory : I am never a fanboy of anything although I am loyal to the tools I use daily. So OS is also something I picked and use to meet my needs except when I was a student. My first linux experience was about a decade ago with ubuntu. Have tried almost all kinds of light-weight and minimal distros after that (lubuntu, arch, mint, puppylinux, fedora, centos and others I forgot) during my student years.

I like all things minimal. ("Keep It Simple Stupid" is my email signature.) When I started working, Windows became the sole OS I use since it met my needs better than others. Except that one time when I tried Elementary. Although I found it a good OS, it didn't get installed as a dual-boot. I don't find Elementary minimal. It is one of well designed OSs but I still think it can be improved. (Plus I had this weird feeling that it is similar to Mac OS)

At the start of this year, Widows alone was not enough for my needs. Decided to look for a minimal linux distro. My old i7 ASUS has 8GB RAM and roughly 250GB free storage. So I am not that worried about hardware requirements. My main struggle is downloading stuffs. (Few of you guys must know by now the speed of my internet LOL.) Well, even if I had a good speed, I will still look for minimal distro as first priority. So I went with minimal ubuntu image and xubuntu environment. Although I do not like the UI design, it is acceptable. Through out the years, I have configured it to suit my needs and currently pretty happy with it.

Thoughts on POP!_OS : To me, it is literally like meeting a young girl who is perfect for my life. She has the perfect body, beautiful face, amazing appearance and good manners. And she is young, of course there is a lack of experience issue. But it can be taught and she has a very high chance to become a wonderful lady if she continues like this. Only crap is I already have someone and in a committed relationship. So I could not go any further than introduction. I do save her contact and will keep in touch with her online. You know? Things change. Things always change somehow.

Not a dev related rant but more of a workplace rant.

I work in a business center with around 30 small offices. We share the common areas like kitchen, meeting rooms and bathroom.

Today, the cleaning lady told me to use the bathroom on the other side of the workplace because she spread bleach all over the men's restrooms floor.

The reason? Someone peed completely outside the toilet. I understand men can miss a couple of drops but a complete load? It's not the first time it has happened but I can only think he enjoys doing it.

I wish I had my own bathroom...

I know you are reading this rant from a toilet

This is a very mild rant about character limit saying that there are >0 characters left when writing comments, then refusing to submit.

I'm so fucking infuriated! I almost raised an eyebrow in anger! What the fuck, my life is literally ruined, this bug is making my toilet visits insignificantly worse!

So... Yesterday I ordered a meal and it had whole jalapenos in it. I didn't order jalapeños. I love the taste but I hate toilet visits after. Hence, was putting them aside. But then I got into that new code, jumping around this new project I'll be working on. We were getting intimate. I liked the architecture, I liked it a lot - it was using event sourcing and respected CQRS. Suddenly I realised I ate everything. Including jalapeños. And the only reason I noticed is because I was eating with my hands. And my eye got watery. And I wiped it.

So, yeah. Yesterday for the first time in my life I was pouring milk into my eyes. Does this count as a proper dev rant? I don't know. Fuck the protein interface that can't process simple food orders, though.

I'll tell all my dev employees to use devrant. Why? Because I'll definitely rant about him/her, so he should do the same about me.

One of my pet peeves is coming across a post on stackoverflow with an awesome answer and even a comment from the OP saying this is exactly what I needed but it's not marked as the answer. Really? It's longer to write the comment.

Toilet Dev rant - my urine went into mute mode when that creepy business head almost 7 feet stood in the urinal next to me and said hi. What the fuck from such height he can easily view the entire map of the urinals and what not. And why the fuck my urine went mute not even a single drop went through. I hate it

October's begun and I haven't even started on my game. Fuck.

My SO's birthday is in December and I wanted to make a small game for her using elements from Limbo and the like because I can't draw anymore and because the graphics automatically become easier to make by myself that way. It's a 2d puzzle solving narration driven platformer where the player finds their way across the levels to his other half (simple and cute, maybe even cheesy).

But see, the thing is, I took on too much work again and I can 'barely' juggle them let alone work on the game and it's going to be December before I'll even know it. And I made sure to plan a really simple game with no extra flowers and shit to make sure I'd finish it on time but I won't be able to at this rate and it just makes me sad, like fuck, should've thought this through before. :/ But now here I am, ranting away while taking the dump of my life on the toilet taking out my frustration in quite the literal sense while verbally slapping my shit on devRant.

Feels bad man.

Worst disturbance? This person who sits behind my back. I've gotten used to them not minding their own business and snooping into mine but to counter that they've taken to distracting me and others all the time.
Sample this incident from just a few moments ago (inspiring the rant).

Me: *debugging while listening to some ambient music channel
Them: *rushes to my desk, putting a hand behind my back
Me: *politely takes off headphones asking, What?
Them: *after peeking at my screen, nvm, I'll tell you later, I have a meeting to go to.

Fucking hell, idiot! It already takes me hours of pushing myself to come to work at this good for nothing place and then actually get to working. Just flush your head in the toilet so you don't take a dump on me with your shitty restlessness.

A certain app I use occasionally has some premium features that I have been too cheap to buy. Just found the full source code on GitHub. An hour later I have all the premium features for free. Stealing? Nah, my conscious is clear.

To all indie devs out there: if you have paid features, don't make the app open source.

Woke up

Sit at computer

Start to code cause i have a lot of shit to do and i have to do it in a fast enough timeframe

Stomach: nah hold on remember the recruiter from yesterday? The one who posted a job requirements of 3+ years experience, you told him you have 8+ years and he rejected you because you don't have 10+ years? Yeah. You feeling that in your stomach? That's the bullshit from yesterday that piled up now. Go and take a shit now

And now im wasting my time writing this rant while shitting the bullshit from yesterday. I hate shitting. But recruiters make me shit so much. Recruiters somehow transfer wirelessly their bullshit onto me so i have to dump the shit somewhere else. Cant hold it in me from the huge mass of the bullshit they have.

Woke up and didnt even have time to start coding from how much my belly wanted to shit. By writing this pointless poentry of a rant to kill some time until i dump all the bullshit out and finally start coding my side project asap i imagine this toilet to be the face of all recruiters. Clients. Jobs. Schools. Colleges. Teachers. Everyone who deceived me and wasted my time. Truly fuck off and get fucked

(first rant. woot!)

What the fuck are people eating in this office?? How the hell do they manage to spray paint the entire back side of the toilet bowl with a thick layer of fudge? Why the fuck would they think everyone else needs to see their spray painting skills?

# Gave me a job and more stress and literally nightmares;
# Physically resisting myself to give solutions to everything people moan about. Even myself. But we know things flap in production;
# Cursing my life, other people's code, customer's IQ more often;
# Getting more LinkedIn, messages, profile views and requests than my social media (which I really don't give a shit about);
# Using a combination of programming punctuations in usual writing (this rant for example);
# My sleep is down the toilet;
# Never complaining any coffee as long as it works;

Ah... Android layout frustrations... Now I can laugh about it and enjoy my #rant-commit from yesterday.

But seriously, I can't wait for Android to be over in 2017... The framework grew into a massive pile of fragmented, fermented and undocumented shit, that gets smellier every Google I/O when they try to flush it down the toilet, but it gets stuck.

My shitting streak has begun again. Fuck. Its cold where i live and in my house. Shitting liquid shit doesnt help because my asshole burns. Its not fun and not enjoyable. Im trying to hold shit inside me but it forces me to shit. And if i shit it burns. Imagine being in a cold -75° weather while your asshole is burning heat at +45°. Why is life such a constant stream of pain and suffering. I write this as i sit on the toilet and fight demons not to shit more in order to prevent pain

Why did our designer invent shitting and thought it was a good idea?

I can think of a better idea: whatever i eat gets dissolved into particles by acid that my body produces like an implosion inside a submarine and transforms into pure energy that my body absorbs and thus makes the body more powerful -- no need to shit it out because its now a bunch of fucking particles!

WHY wouldnt that be a better solution. Shitting is disgusting and makes no sense if this solution is also possible. And for an omniscient all-powerful all-knowing celestial being -- NOTHING is impossible to do.

what we perceive as "magic" is normal to an all-powerful celestial entity. Therefore any thought you can imagine, should be possible to do. Even the idea i just proposed because i proved i could imagine it so it must be possible to create such existence

And as i finish writing off this rant, my asshole burns less and everything is coming back to normal Thank God. The pain was bearly bareable. As a finishing touch of this rant imma go wipe my ass for 100th time today and continue working with nextjs on my project

Nothing better than a remote work from home except while we're on a meeting on teams I'm sitting on the toilet dumping a massive 💩💩💩 and writing this rant