One of my friend's was watching me code. When I got an error, this is what he said.

"You got a big error, so you must be a bad programmer"

Me: I finished the website.
Client: Thanks, It looks really good!
Client: But could you make me a Facebook page instead?

😐

Microsoft Engineer Installs Google Chrome Mid-Presentation After Edge Kept Crashing

And it only time him one minute!
That deserves a round of appulse.

Source:
http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/...

I seem to be everyone's free tech support. I'm always helping my friends and family but I don't get anything in return. 😣

My mum told me to, "get the sheets of the line."

I did as she asked, but later that night she came back and said, "where are the pillow cases?"

Israeli government hackers hacked into Kaspersky’s network in 2015 and caught Russian government hackers red-handed hacking US government hackers with the help of Kaspersky.

In other words — Russia spying on America, Israel spying on Russia and America spying on everyone.

I had quite the rage at the Unreal Engine just now.

Why would you make the Z-axis up and down? 😐

I was told that my granny was having trouble signing into Facebook, so I go to help her and this is what happens.

Me: try and open Facebook.
Granny: *looks confused*
Granny: oh I know!
Granny: *opens up Gmail*
Me: *wtf is she doing?*
Granny: *opens an email from Facebook*
Granny: ok, I'm in Facebook.

Not sure whether to cringe or laugh 😅

*I was recruiting programmer's for a Unity game and this guy came along*

Me: So what can you program in?

Pearson: HTML and a bit of CSS.

Me: *oh dear* any else?

Person: I learnt Python recently. I know how to make variables!

What about the server that just responded?

When I try to impress someone by saying smart things but it backfires horribly.

I was in class and this one guy was having difficulty with Word's auto correct. The teacher goes over to help him and this is what I overhear.

"Damn artificial intelligence... We need to make sure that we're always the ones on top and that we never give them to much control!"

*teacher then proceeds to discuss the dangers of AI with the entire class*

The funniest part is, this was in my Japanese class 😂

Me: *does a few keyboard shortcuts rapidly*

Teacher: I see your quite competent on a computer.

I can code better then most CS students, but if I want to go to university I have to take things like calculus... why

Leaked image of an NSA implant 👍😁

I get depressed during times like this.

Me: *does a keyboard shortcut*
Friend: Woaw, are you good on computers?
Me: yea.
Friend: CAN YOU HACK?
Me: yea...
Friend: WHATS MY PASSWORD?
Me: I don't know your password.
Friend: You can't hack then.

Noisy co-workers are driving me insane 😁

I get depressed when I see templates that look better than anything I could ever come up with 😯

How does one find a gf that can code? 😉

The world will end when time_t overflows...

!rant

Just wondering, how many programmer's are religious?

When you spend ages trying to get your JS to work but it just won't.

Then you realise Chrome cached an old broken version...

Sometimes I wish that I could ctrl+z in real life

Me: do you even know what computer programming is?

Person: agh yea... its when you program a computer...

Person: Yea, I used to program
Me: Oh nice, what language?
Person: CCS
Me: 😂 *holding it in*

*me teaching someone to code*

Me: So what do you think will happen when we run this?
Student: ummm... I don...🤔
Random: I KNOW! It does xyz 😄
Student: agh yea, it does xyz 😅
Me: (ffs) 😐

Nothing gets learned in the end 😮

Girl: Can you make me an app?
Me: What kind of app do you have in mind?
Girl: I want it to be... like an app!
Me: Sounds a bit to difficult sorry.

Started sniffing the packets on a public wifi hotspot. Found someone was reading TheHackerNews and got excited.😲 Later realised it was myself. 😯

When I was trying to learn about parameters 😂

Updated the site Joomla from 3.6 to 3.7. Then got a call saying some pages weren't working. "No problem," I said, "we have backups." Restored a backup, but then found out it was corrupt... The entire site went down 😭