Frustrated that my build system wasn't recognizing a file change I added to my code. It kept telling me that a function didn't exist in the linked object (linker error). I checked everything and stared at this shit for about 15 minutes or more. The signature matched, the function existed, the relevant source files existed. I was starting to imagine impossible scenarios. I cleaned the project and recompiled. No errors, everything linked just fine. Fuck you? I guess...

So I decided to needed to walk around so I went into my bosses office.

me: I don't want to program anymore.
boss: What do you want to do?
me: Shovel shit.
boss: They are the same thing.
me: True...

TLDR: Tool and possibly skill issue results in frustration and humor.

*Applies to 60+ jobs*

All I get is more spam in my email inbox.

The job market is FUCKED right now

Aaaargh. What a bitch

Ads are intentionally produced litter.

Deleted over 1'500 lines of code over the last 2 days and replaced it with 80 lines of readable, simple, generic code.

And I'm feeelin' gooood 🎶

We had a production outage directly caused by our team not following a change procedure correctly. Now we're under a microscope and in a "get well" program.

They took over the daily standup for this high priority program and are organizing efforts in confluence instead of jira.

Now we have a confluence doc of what everyone is working on with someone changing the text status in a table by hand every morning along with the comments in a note section...

My manager wants to have a conversation about my attitude. Time to explain that when I worked hard I got no pay rise, I only got a promotion because I lost my rag at him when he was being an arse. I have no motivation to do anything other than the bare minimum.

So true

ahem…

Well, well, well, if it isn't the consequences of my own actions

I did it.

I finally fucked prod.

And had to do open heart surgery on the service to get it unfucked.

Shit happens. Luckily its internal prod only...

Update to my "I broke prod" rant:

- I managed to unfuck it on the same evening.
- Worked fine for one day
- Crashed today morning
- Can't fix it because I had surgery yesterday and am on sick leave currently
=> Probably gonna result in me VPNing into the comp network and RDPing into the prod instance to analyse the failure

Yep, ladies and gents, more open heart surgery on the menu!

LinkedIn: You have one notification!!!!

Me: What is it?

LinkedIn: 10 types of horses that make your more employable if you don't fuck them

Me: What

LinkedIn: 10 types of h-

Me: No, I heard you, why did you send me a notification about this?

LinkedIn: You want a job, don't you?

Me: Yes, but don't send me this type of notification again.

LinkedIn: Updated your preferences!

The nefarious LinkedIn, two days later: You have one new notification!!!!!!

!rant I swear I only started out with the intention to make a Mario.

I give up. It‘s impossible to argue with Apple.

I tried to bring my unofficial iOS devRant app "JoyRant" into the AppStore. It was available via TestFlight for years and it wasn‘t a problem there, apparently. Now for the AppStore, it is a problem.

I talked with the Apple review team for 3 weeks and the discussion went in circles.
They said that my app tries to disguise as or to misrepresent another app on the store (the official devRant app, even though it‘s not available anymore, apparently).

I was asked to remove all of the mentions of devRant from any description or any place in the app. I did. Even though it was stupid because how are people supposed to know that they need a devRant account to use my app? I‘m not allowed to mention devRant.

After that, they said that it can not have the name JoyRant because it sounds too similar to devRant.
I changed it to devJoy everywhere, the app, the meta data for the app store, the github page where the required legal crap is hosted, and in the legal documents themselves.
Did it help? No, it didn‘t.

Apple then proceeded to claim that my app is trying to deceive the users into thinking that this is the official devRant app. Even though I have explicitly stated in the description that it is just an unofficial devRant client.

Now apple says that I should "revise the app content".
Which I assume means that I need to make it something different. Yeah. Great suggestion!

So, I will rename the app back to JoyRant and provide it via TestFlight, as it was before.

Thanks for reading. I needed to vent.

It's easy getting these two mixed up when the trouble starts...

a quote of todays daily standup:

"<other guy>, did you had time to investigate that disastrous SQL query. I had no time, one of my horses was giving birth"

Little bit of background I've been a front end developer for the past eight years not a good one but I get by. Last 4 working with consulting firms for fortune 500 clients. Big projects big plans big structure, following someone else's lead and just knowing the basics of code reviewing, git flow, code deployment and everything else... life happens and i end up as a front end developer for a big company not tech related that wants to depend less from consultants and do more in house dev. Seems a pretty straightforward project front in angular. Back on python doing queries to a database with sql server. I finish the on-boarding and after two weeks finally get access to the repos. Worst spaghetti code I've ever seen. Seems like someone took a vanilla script project from 10 years ago and push it into an angular tutorial project. Commented code, no comments for the code, deprecated functions still there, no use of typescript nested ifs hell. I try to do my job doing new features do comments clean up a bit. Senior developers get annoyed

We have an open space at the office, and you can hear things people say in their teams meetings.
Most common question is: "When do you think you will be done with ... task?"

Crowdstrike event caused a disaster at my company.
No, we didn't had a single crash, but something much worse has happened. My tech lead who lives in early 90's got his confirmation that we shall run with 0 internet, everything on premise, no source control, no external libraries only the absolute must that doesn't need ever any update. Finally we started to show him how powerful an azure pipeline would be, but after this, there's no hope.

Fights in the daily standup. That's a new one!

No raise. Not like I single handedly rewrote one of our weirdest and most complex legacy code bases or anything... Oh and even so they whined about how long that took that's probably reason they'll cite if I ask about this lack of raise thing.

I mean, technically I got a little more just because the tax rates are different for the new financial year but come on

Today it finally happend! I deleted Prod!
Accidentally connected to the wrong db to wipe it.

2010: having so many toolbars intalled in the browser you can barely see the actual webpage.
2024: having so many banners and popups in the webpage you can barely see the actual webpage.

I am living my dream.

I have a nice fam, enough capital, a job I enjoy, I'm enjoying the life in this world every day now. And yesterday I caught myself in a moment that 10 years ago I thought only happens in movies. An engineer participating in a meeting with the client while riding on a motorcycle.

I mean, how cool is that! It may not seem like much now, because it was a necessity - I had to be at 2 places at once. But a 10 years younger me would wet his pants if he knew I would one day be doing that IRL.

How about you? How would a 10 years younger you feel about the _now_ you?

Sufficiently advanced XML is indistinguishable from satire

Hey, @dfox

Is there anything we can do to help?
We miss you, and we want to keep devRant alive too.

I've spent too much time online... I'm in a zoom meeting, I missed what someone said, reached to my keyboard to rewind then realised it was live... 🙈

I wonder how many bitflips did they trigger last night...

Looks pretty. But much too scarry when you understand what it is.

The guy I work with was pissed because I asked him the status of his task during the daily meeting.
He doesn't want me to embarrass him because he hasn't finished this task. He said not to push him further as he will do it soon.

Dude, the point of having a daily meeting is to give updates of all pending tasks. it's been one week, you're procrastinating on this task is delaying the progress of my task.
Mind you, this guy has a PhD but he can't even understand a simple project management like this.

Hehehe this whole team is clown world 🤪🤡