FUCK WORDPRESS

FUCKING FUCK THIS GODFORSAKEN CMS

FUCK THE GUY WHO USED PLUGINS WHO BREAK WHEN I TRY TO UPGRADE FROM PHP 5 TO PHP 7

FUCK THE THEME BUILDER WHICH WON'T WORK UNLESS I SWITCH TO PHP 7

FUCK THIS ENTIRE WEBSITE WHICH DEPENDS ON A PHP VERSION THAT HAS REACHED END OF LIFE ONE FUCKING YEAR AGO

FUCK THE OLD PEOPLE THAT ADMINISTER IT, AND DON'T WANT TO LEARN HOW TO USE NEW PLUGINS AND KEEP USING THE OLD, BROKEN AND UN-MAINTAINABLE ONES

special mention: fuck this one fucking plugin who claims to implement paypal when it doesn't actually work, and the 2 fucking thousand of JQuery lines I have to go through to fix it

TL;DR you suck, I suck and everybody sucks, deal with it....

------------------------------------

Let me let off some steam, since I've had enough of people hating on languages "just because"

Every language has it's drawbacks and quirks, BUT they have their strengths also. Saying "I hate {language}" is just you being and ignorant prick and probably your head is so far up your ass that you look like an ass hat. With that being said, every language is either good or bad depending on the developer writing in it. Let's give you an example:

If I ware to give you a brick and ask you to put a nail in a plank, can you do it? Yes, it will be easier if you do it with a hammer, but you have a brick, so hammer is out of the question. If you hit your thumb while doing it... well... sorry, but it is not the bricks fault - it is YOU!

JavaScript, yes it has a whole lot of problems, but it works, you can do a ton of stuff and does a good job at that, it is evolving through node and typescript (and others, just a personal pref), BUT if you used js when you ware debugging that jquery (1.0) plugin written in the free time of a 13 yo, who copy pasted a bunch from SO, well, it is not js' problem - deal with it. Same goes for PHP, i've been there where you had a single `index.php` with bazillion lines of code, did a bunch of eval and it was called MVC, but it also is evolving.. thing is all languages allow you to do some dumb stuff so YOU have to be responsible to not fuck it up (which you always DO btw, we all do). Difference is PHP/JS roll with it because the assumption is that you know what you are doing, which again - newsflash - you don't.

More or less I would blame that shit on businesses which decided to go with undergrads to save money instead of investing in their product, hell, I am in a major company that does not invest that doesn't care a whole lot about dev /tech stuff and now everybody's mother is an engineer - they care about money, because investors care about money (ROI) and because clean code does not pay the bills, but money does.

If we get all of the good practices and apply them to each language every one of them has it's place, that is why there is no "The Language", even if there was, we STILL ware going to fuck it up and probably it was going to be even worse than where we are now.

Study, improve, rinse and repeat... There are SENIORS and LEADS out there that are about 25-30 and have no fucking clue about the language, because they have stuck up their heads up the ass of frameworks and refuse to take a breath of clean air and consider something different than their dogmatic framework "way" of doing things.. That is the result you are seeing. Let me give you a fresh example to illustrate where I am at atm:

Le me works with ZendFramework 2.3-2.5 (why not, which is PHP5+ running on PHP7 [fancy, eh]), and little me writes a module for said project, and tries to contain it in its own space, i.e not touching anything outside of the folder of the module so it is SELF-CONTAINED (see, practices), during 2-3-4 iterations of code review, I've had to modify 4 different modules with `if (somthing === self::SOMETHING_TYPE)` as requested by my TL, which resulted in me not covering 3 use-cases after the changes and not adding a new event (the fw is event-driven, cuz.. reasons) so I have to use a bunch of ifs in the code, to check a config value and do shit. That is the way of I am asked to do things I hate what I've done and the fact that because of CR I have lost case-coverage, a week of work and the same TL will be on my ass on monday that things are now "perfect".

The biggest things is "we care about convention and code style"... right.... That is not because of the language, not because of me, not because of the framework - it is some dude's opinion that you hate, not the language.

New stuff are better, reinventing the wheel is also good, if it wasn't you would've had a few stone circular things on your car and things ware going to be like that - we need to try and try, that is the only way we actually learn shit.

Until things change in the trade, we will be on the same boat, complaining about the same shit over and over, you and me won't be alive probably but things will not change a bit.

We live in a place where state is considered good, god objects necessary (can you believe it, I've got kudos for using the term 'God Object'... yep, let that sink in). If you really hate something, please, oh god I beg you, show me how you will do it better and I will shake your hand and buy you a beer, but until then, please keep your ass-hurt fanboy opinion to your self, no one gives a shit about what you think, we will die and the world will not notice...

People who use a jQuery plugin to display and style radio buttons.........

!rant

What are people thinking when they are building datepickers (or any type of angular/jQuery plugin for that matter)?

Lets put all of the code in one file, place everything that should be dynamic and optimizable in constants, provide no localization support, finish it all up, publish it to bower and npm (so poor devs won't have to struggle) and last but not least don't accept pull requests with useful features for months!

There is an nerdy socially retarded IT head. He asked me to look into a project after the programmers left the company. Basically he gave me a list of modification with one particular screenshot of Calendar( seems like a JQuery plugin) and asked me to develop it.. I asked him to give me the link from where he got the Calendar... No fucking response in Skype.
So after a month he asked me to show the project, I showed him with the Calendar similar to picture and no functionality. He said it was CRAP. I asked him to give me proper documentation as what he expects and what he wants.
BUT FUCK NO. HE SAYS, "ARE YOU A JUNIOR CODER? DO IT WITHIN A WEEK OR WE ARE DONE. "
And I am here keeping myself in control not to punch him. he lives nearby my house wondering if he lives alone 😂

You know that feeling when the junior programmers do their job quickly, properly, and elegantly just like how you would have done it? :)

Yeeeeah, me neither. What the fuck is this dog shit?? God dammit! Why we have 2MB of CSS?? Do you even you this jQuery plugin?? What do you mean frontend.php and frontend2.php?? Why is this block of code indented all the way to the right?? "Just 1 bug left" OH REAAAAALLLYYYYY?

I just saw this on a website. Good to know that they use some kind of jQuery draggable plugin for encryption.

Overhears colleague say 'Ohh there's a plugin for that'. Few weeks later i find the dumb fuck added it to the codebase and not use the dependency manager. I'd happily shoot the senior Dev who peer reviewed it but looks like this pleb merged straight in!

With a codebase overflowing with duplicate frameworks and unused jquery plugins I'll be burning the god damn place down come next week!

I have been given the displeasure of updating a company's WordPress website which was built and (sort of) maintained by another company which ended up closing down. NOTHING WAS DOCUMENTED. Almost no comments added anywhere. Not even a description of the what a particular file does. File names are basically completely random. There are 3 versions of the same theme this company made and no indication of which one is actually being used. On top of this; they used plugins and modified them, so they cant even be updated without them breaking. As well; after looking around it seems they used jQuery mixed with Angular (or maybe the plugin creators did this?). The website isnt mobile friendly either; one of my tasks was to see what I could do with fixing this. Seems basically impossible based on the complete mess of a project this is.
All this being said, I just graduated from Post Secondary and have almost no experience working with WordPress, There arent even other developers to help assist me on this project.....
Gonna be quite the experience.

So i'm visiting the JavaScript bubble every now and then when i'm writing on the userscript i develop to fix bugs in our ticketing system or fix some clients website they negelected. Every time i'm searching for answers to the weird problems that inevitably turn up i have to filter out all the threads that derail with the classic 'google jQuery basic arithmetic plugin' craziness to find an actual vanilla solution to my problem.

All the time i wonder why on earth people put up with this framework hell. This is part serious question and part rant but seriously, how did we come to this? With all that jQuery, React, Node, whatever stuff i'm kinda losing the overview over what's even todays standard. I always try to keep my code as vanilla as possible without using external libraries. But it seems the entire web development industry is heading the completly other way. I tried to look into a few frameworks but i never really see the appeal. Just now i looked up react native because the last 20 rants talked about it and immediately noped out because they fucking create a DOM in js, why the fuck would you do this?!

Worst thing about this framework shithole is that some frameworks are beeing pulled into the mix for very weird and unnecessary reasons. Best example is a charts library i recently used to visualize a database of temperatures that was completely written in native js but pulled jQuery in for the equivalent of window.addEventListener('load',function(stuff)) and i was furious. I rewrote the code and could throw out the jQuery dependency with no problem. What the fuck is wrong with people?

Alright since you made it here: I'm not trying to throw any of you under the bus for using frameworks. I just fail to understand why you would use these. To each their own and unless your site has the performance of the ticketing system i use at work that takes like 15 seconds to load one fucking page i won't complain at all. But pull in a framework just to do a task you can easily do in native js in remotely the same timeframe you are on my list.

!rant

Finally (kinda) done with the nicknames addon. I wanted to hook into the sites actual modal menus for the UI, but I don't know JQuery and I somehow doubt modifying the existing javascript of a site from a plugin is possible, so we're stuck with knockoffs for now. But it works, it saves and loads nicknames correctly and displays them everywhere except on the notifications because I didn't add an onload listener to them.

First day of new job. No more rants about Blue Prism, that's in the past now. New year new me!

Time to go back to rant against backend developers and their fucking Laravel.

First lesson of the day: if I see another select2 I'm gonna commit war crimes. You see this nice plugin for jQuery, you use it everything's so cool and modern and you think you're the smart one of the team 'cause you don't know you've just polluted an otherwise perfectly fine web page with the dirtiest js shit you could possibly find, just because you didn't feel like searching one more minute for whatever replacement for a drop down you can easily find.

You're not the smart one. You're a criminal.

So, finally decided to write my first rant.
I finished today a function that takes the generated week calendar of a WordPress plugin and gives the user a nice print layout.
Problem: The plugin doesn't use the database for it's calendar, only for the events in the calendar. I had to write really unefficent code in jQuery(ajax) and PHP and additionally create a new table. Finally completed the code for printing out a selected day, the current week and a timespan that can be defined, every exception and input is now handled correctly .
Such a great feeling to be finally done with this 4000 rows code.
I hope that I will never again have to create a workaround for such a not-developer-friendly plugin.
Why do clients always want to use such plugins?!

Isotope.js is an awesome jquery plugin for anyone looking to sort, filter, or search for items (html elements with specific class or attr)

Any recommendations on a jquery/js plugin that saves form fields in the scenario where the user left the form or page they can come back and still have the values from when they left. I wrote up some thing for a small form on an old site using sessionStorage api but I need something that can work with any form or perhaps multiple forms at once. any good plugins out there?

Got jQuery machine test 3 hours later.test includes plugin development and menu generation from json. I am an angular dev. Should I go through anything else other than official docs and ancient youtube videos?