Do all the things like ++ or -- rants, post your own rants, comment on others' rants and build your customized dev avatarSign Up
Get a devDuck
Rubber duck debugging has never been so cute! Get your favorite coding language devDuckBuy Now
Search - "that was lame"
Now now, chill. I'm using it as my main OS for a few years now. I know what I'm talking and this title is a bit click-baity, but this just has to go out there:
1. It's usable as a Windows replacement just fine - FALSE. XFCE4 is years old and buggy as hell especially on multi-monitor set-up, Gnome3 gets stuck more often than my Windows 98 machine used to, KDE is like a rich kid on meth. Plug in Bluetooth headphones? Well no, sorry, you have to research that online, since you'll probably need to install some packages for it to work. Did I say "work"? Well no, because after more research you realize that Debian on Gnome3 on gdm3 launches pulseaudio on its own, so you have 2 instances of pulseaudio, and one of them is stealing your headphones sometimes and you either have no sound or shitty sound. How do I know that you ask? The same way I know everything else - every time you try to do something new on any Linux, it involves a ton of research. Exciting research, don't get me wrong, but at this point it looks more like a toy than a reliable desktop computer operating system.
2. And why am I using pulseaudio? Why not alsa? years ago people were discussing on forums that pulseaudio is old and dead, yet here we are with new LTS release of Ubuntu still shining with Pulseaudio. How about several different service management systems being deprecated by new ones, each having different configurations and calling methods? Apparently systemd is old and lame now. It's a mix of 10 year old software that works badly, with a 5 year old replacement that works worse, somehow trying to live under the same roof. Does it work? Ask my headphones who sound like a fucking dial-up modem.
3. Let's talk about displays, shall we? xorg is old and deprecated, right? We got Wayland that's mostly stable. Don't know what that is? That's just basic knowledge for Linux. And when you try to install network-manager, it also tries to install Mir toolkits. Because why the fuck not install 3 display managers when you want a network manager, of which one is old and dying, one is young and stupid, and another is an infant that died of cancer?
4. Want to integrate with Google Drive? Yeah, there's a tool that mounts the drive as a local directory. Yeah only for Ubuntu. Want it on Debian? You need to compile it. Oh wait, it's on Ocaml, because fuck mainstream languages, we're hipsters. How do you compile Ocaml? Well you need to have Ocaml on your system, dummy. How do you do that? Well you need to compile Ocaml. Ok, how do I do that? Well, git clone, download and install some dependencies, configure, make... oh sorry, you're using libssl1.0.2g when you need libssl1.0.1f, nope, sorry, won't work. Want to install libssl1.0.1f? Why? You already have the "g", stupid! Want to remove libssl1.0.2g? Bye-bye literally everything that you have on your PC. But at least you got the "f". Does it work now? Well no, because you need libssl1.0.2g for another dependency to work.
And all I ever wanted was to get a fucking document from google drive (not nudes, I promise).
5. Want to watch a movie? Let me tear that screen in half and make the bottom half late by a couple of frames, because who needs vertical sync, right? Oh you do? Well install the native drivers maybe. Oh you have? Welcome to eternal Boot to Recovery mode, motherfucka!
Yeah, most of the times things work just fine. But the reason I know what those things are and how they work is not curiosity. The reason that I know the inner workings of Linux much better than the inner workings of Windows, is because in those few years that I've been using it full time, it has caused me 10 times more headache than I have ever experienced with other systems. And it's not the usual annoyances like "OMG it rebooted when I didn't ask it to", but more like "Oh, it won't work and I need 2 days to find out why" kind of stuff, because even if you experience the same thing again, it's always caused by some new shit and the old solution won't work any more.
I still love it, and will continue to use it. I don't know why really. Maybe because I'm not afraid of fucking it up any more? Maybe because I can do what I want in it and recovering will be easier than on Windows?
It's a toy for me, after all these years. And I also use it for professional reasons.
But whenever someone presents it as a better alternative to Windows, I just want to puke.50
Is this the code life
Another scrum meeting
Caught in the the Node life
No escape from reality
Open your eyes
Look up to the screens and see..
I'm just a dev boy
Doing some debugging
Because there's warnings here
Anytime you distract
Takes another hour from me
Mama. Just committed a bug
Merge the branch to production
Did it fast for milestones
Mama. The repo has just begun
But now they going to throw the stack away.
Mama. U u u uu
Didn't mean to code in LAMP
But it's the only stack i know how to setup
In Ubuntu. Without docker
I really don't get vagrant
It's too late
My team is done
Some dev is working in Nepal
A UX dev. Now what is that?
I've got to go
Gotta leave this lame meeting
And face the truth
Oh nooooo. I i interns
(they have questions)
I want to debug
I don't want to stay till 3 in the morning
I see a litlle dev over there
Let's code review, let's code review
Did he do the last commit?
Coding in the white board
Very very frightening me
That's bug(that's a bug)
That's a bug (that's a bug)
What the f*ck did you do that?
I was just coding and nobody liked it
He was coding and nobody liked it, spare his some time to do his debugging
Easy man. Here go. Will you let me code?
A meeting. No,we will not let you code. ( let me code)
A meeting. we will not let you code. ( let me code)
A meeting. we will not let you code. ( let me code)
We will not let you code
Never never let you go
Never let you code, oh
No no no no no no no
Oh mama mia, mama mia ( dude, you've gotta let me code)
Screw you guys, I'm gonna code and commit. Commit. Comiiiiitt!
So you think you can review me and spit in my eye?
So you think you can dump me and erase my branch?
Oh baby, cant do this to me baby
I've just have to log out.
I've just have to log outta here
*epic guitar solo
Nothing really matters
The users will not care
Nothing really matters
Any way this code blows10
Sexist prick alert!
So wearing my summer dress and generally all dolled up for a massive work summer party I hear from one of the devs from a remote location that "wow, I do not look like a developer" and "I look like I should have things explained to me at a high overview ha-ha-ha" but it was "a compliment" so me getting pissed was "overreacting" and I "should calm down"
Sorry but no.
Please do not ever say anything like that to any female developer, even if you mean it "as a compliment" (that sounds like.. you know.. like you're saying women generally prefer make up to thinking)
That's lame af if you ask me60
It's a pretty long rant. Hope you didn't get bored :P
So I have this friend of mine who has learnt Python at good level (that's what he says) and is with me in all classes in college. I have worked with C, C++, C# and Java only and hated Python when it was taught (wk44).
So the following happened in the last 2 weeks:
Once he wrote a Python function in terminal just returning a hard coded string (lame right) and will show me how cool is it and that it is sooo much easier.
Whenever we do a mini project together he will force that we use Python. Even in Image processing when everyone is ready to work on Matlab, he insists that Python would be a better option.
We asked that this XYZ is very easy to implement on Matlab.
We then had to listen about the large and great community of Python and that it has Libraries for everything and that it is the greatest programming language ever.
One day he saw my C# project for DFA and NFA simulation which was the greatest project I have "completed" myself, and went like "Hmph, if I was you, I would use python and make a more "professional" code" (then went on arguing as always)
This happened today in Networking lab-
(Sockets was taught and we are expected to learn its programming aspects)
All students: Open linuxhowtos.org and start reading on socket programming
He : Opens some websites and downloads books on Networking with Python or someting
Now while I am reading the documentation of sockets and bind, he opens spider IDE, copy-paste the code in the book and start bugging ME that he is getting all these errors like literally showing me those errors and whining about all those problems.
Me: We are supposed to learn this in C. Here take a look at this link.
HE: No I'll use Python cuz it is better than your C. It has libraries for everything and is much easier.
Me: Alright whatever I am fed up, do whatever you want12
Venting some anger, this is a long one
So last Friday we had a 'Christmas' party at work... Only it wasn't a Christmas party... Because that would be racist against people who don't celebrate Christmas (of whom they are none at work), also no Christmas songs, because of the same reason and because it looked unprofessional... They also removed karaoke... (an Christmas tradition at the office) Because again, it was unprofessional
But we all got a Christmas card... Strange because we weren't allowed to celebrate it 😑 and the message in that card was one of the most standard messages I've ever seen, something like
Hello $name, we enjoyed working with you in 2017, let's make 2018 even better, merry Christmas
MERRY CHRISTMAS!? BUT THAT'S RACIST WASN'T IT!!!???
W T F !
also our sales guy did a speech, the following is an actual quote
'software is an amazing product'
Yeah mate, software is the product... Totally not the stuff we create with it
Sorry if people get/are offended in anyway, but if you decide that having a Christmases party at work is racist in any way or form, then don't have a party at all... Not some lame half Christmas party...
Warning : (gross && !dev) == true
Fuck my nose, fuck the unbearably hot weather, and fuck toilet paper industry (above all and everything).
I was taking a dump, sweat dripping from my forehead under these 32°C (90°F) (we Belgians use to live in the rain, that's our natural habitat). When without any warning, my weak and sensitive nose decided to bleed by itself (again). First reflex: take a deep nasal breath to prevent blood from streaming like a depressed single on Pornhub before I can grab a tissue. Great idea! I fucking love having a deep breath of my own shit, especially when it's so hot that every smell is twice as strong as usual! Then, when grabbing some toilet paper to dig it far up my nose, I just put blood everywhere, anyway. So I'm here, pants down, dirty ass, trying to clean the blood before it dries, having to watch for my tissue to not become too soaked.
Done. I can now start to wipe my ass. I use 3 papers, and I can't go on, because my poor anus cannot tell the difference between toilet paper and sandpaper. Because these dumbasses that study their product don't get that scrubbing chemicals soaked paper against sensitive mucous isn't something that people enjoy. I don't care if your paper has 2 or a gogolplex layers, I don't care if it smells like aloe vera or your Down sister's diapers, I just want my fucking shithole to not look like it just got raped by an army of angry gorillas after it has been cleaned.
Now I'm in a cold bath, because my body wouldn't stop sweating, my nose wouldn't stop bleeding, and I had to wash my ass with water and soap and not with lame stinky paper (it got done in the shower, not in my bath of course). And before I could even begin to fill the bathtub, I had to blow my nose to get rid of the coagulated slugs of blood filling it. Told you it was gross.
And my friends ask why I don't shit more than once a week. Well, because that's the time my anus takes to stop bleeding and hurting after I use it, as simple as that.7
It has been bugging the shit out of me lately... the sheer number of shit-tier "programmers" that have been climbing out of the woodwork the last few years.
I'm not trying to come across as elitist or "holier than thou", but it's getting ridiculous and annoying. Even on here, you have people who "only do frontend development" or some other lame ass shit-stain of an excuse.
When I first started learning programming (PHP was my first language), it wasn't because I wanted to be a programmer. I used to be a member (my account is still there, in fact) of "HackThisSite", back when I was about 12 years old. After hanging out long enough, I got the hint that the best hackers are, in essence, programmers.
Want to learn how to do SQL injection? Learn SQL - write a program that uses an SQL database, and ask yourself how you would exploit your own software.
Want to reverse engineer the network protocol of some proprietary software? Learn TCP/IP - write a TCP/IP packet filter.
Back then, a programmer and a hacker were very much one in the same. Nowadays, some kid can download Python, write a "hello, world" program and they're halfway to freelancing or whatever.
It's rare to find a programmer - a REAL programmer, one who knows how the systems he develops for better than the back of his hand.
These days, I find people want the instant gratification that these simpler languages provide. You don't need to understand how virtual memory works, hell many people don't even really understand C/C++ pointers - and that's BASIC SHIT right there.
Put another way, would you want to take your car to a brake mechanic that doesn't understand how brakes work? I sure as hell wouldn't.
Watching these "programmers" out there who don't have a fucking clue how the code they write does what it does, is like watching a grown man walk around with a kid's toolbox full or plastic toys calling himself a mechanic. (I like cars, ok?!)
Python, AngularJS, Bootstrap, etc. They're all tools and they have their merits. But god fucking dammit, they're not the ONLY damn tools that matter. Stop making excuses *not* to learn something, Mr."IOnlyDoFrontEnd".
Coding ain't Lego's, fuckers.38
My highschool computer eng. teacher works in IT and he was telling us about one of his first days of working for a company and he said "Whenever we had a stupid client or customer, we'd tell each other that we had a 'one D ten T' as a code because it sounds professional. But really, it spells 1D10T"
Lame but it cracked us up and I thought I might share lol3
if you're someone who grades code, fuck you, you probably suck. Turned in a final project for this gis software construction class as a part of my master's degree (this class was fuck all easy, I had two weeks for each project, each of them took me two days). We had to pick the last project, so I submitted final project proposal that performs a two-sample KS test on some point data. Not complex, but it sounds fancy, project accepted. Easy money.
I write the thing and finish it, it works, but it doesn't have a visualization and that makes the results seem pretty lame, even though its fully functional. SO I GO OUT OF MY FUCKING WAY to add a matplotlib chart of the distribution. To do that, at the very bottom of the workflow, I define a function to chart it out because it made the code way more readable. Reminder, I didn't have to do this, it was extra work to make my code more functional.
Then, this motherfucker takes points off because I didn't define the function at the very beginning of the code... THE FUCK, DUDE? But, noobrants, it's "considered best prac--" nope, fuck you, okay? This class was so shit, not once was code style addressed in a lesson or put on any rubric - they didn't give a shit what it looked like - in fact, the whole class only used arcpy (and the csv mod once), they didn't teach us shit about anything except how to write geoprocessing scripts (in other words, how to read arcGIS docs about arcpy) and encouraged us to write in fucking pythonwin. And now, when the class is fucking over, you decide to just randomly toss this shit in, like it was a specific expectation this whole time? AND you do this when someone has gone out of their way to add functionality? Why punish someone who does extra work because that extra work isn't perfect? Literally, my grade would have been better without the visualization.
I'm not even mad at my grade - it was fine - I just hate inconsistency in grading practices and the random raising and lowering of expectations depending on how some grader's coffee tasted that morning. I also hate punishing people for doing more - it's this kind of shit that makes people A) wanna rip their eyeballs out, and B) never do anything more than the basic minimum expectation to avoid extra unwanted attention. If you want your coders to step up and actually put work in to make things the best they can be, yell at a grader to reward extra work and not punish it.4
Turns out what they offered me was barely what I was making at the moment... Why bother even sending me that lame job proposal? You were supposed to want me to work there, or at least that's what you said.1
Several years ago, I heard from a friend who was doing assignments for students on the side. Quite a hustle. His story began when he wanted to figure out why can't these students be able to draw their own database tables, relationships, UML, etc. That's what school has to be teaching them and then he was told that they were learning through MS Access. He goes and tell me that even though this is a lame way of teaching database design, its definitely easier to explain through hands-on and less typing mistakes, as according to the lecturer he met. Making the explanation more visually appealing and helpful for understanding.
OK I get it, but somehow that taught them the wrong way of database design from the beginning. I'd prefer getting them to start writing SQL commands from day 1 and play em at some DB VM. Keep em as real as it gets.
So my first computer... My dad got a Laptop somewhere around 96-97 for work as he had to travel a lot abroad. He also used to take work home and work there in the evening or on weekends. I kindof asked if I could play with it and he just opened defragmenting and I loved the animation. At least I think it had some animation. I know another computer I got later had it. However like the second or third time he left me alone with it, I decided to find something else and somehow managed to instead of defragment the hd, format it. Or atleast delete like a few folders on it. However that game was "lame", so I went out to play with a friend, as the computer wouldn't respond after some time. I've never seen him as angry as when I got home.
Long story short, me and my brother soon got our own computer, like a really " old" one the company where my aunt worked sold. It didn't had a cd rom drive, just a 3.5 and a bigger drive. My dad later took the big tape out and replaced it with a cd rom drive. It ran win95 I think. And we later upgraded it to 982
When I was in school days I didnt like computers that much. I knew how to use them but thought classes were lame.
It was a couple of years ago, in the last year of my first computers-related career (here there's no computer science like in USA). It was in the initial stages of my graduation project and our teacher took a look at our database design, fixed it all. And explained:
"The better you designed your database, the easier it'll be to code the project" Explained to us the importance of database normalization and all that.
I really understood it all and discovered finally what was the thing I was studying and how to do software.
From that day, in my early 20s, I've been loving software and knew this is my thing.
Same feeling 6 years later.2
Is told to make a cool football themed board for a planning expo.
Thinks football is stupid, but makes an awesome board with a built in football game made with a Raspberry Pi and optical sensors to detect when you throw a ball through the hole.
Boss tells me that my board doesn’t match the theme and doesn’t even mention the fact that what I made was cool as fuck.
Have to trash the board and make something lame with construction paper footballs instead.
My soul is dead. Business people are such fucking children who punish creativity and reward mediocrity. I need to find a company run by developers.1
Gf asked me to help her with getting science articles. She had some page that her university suggested students to use, but had troubles with downloading documents.
At first I was like "Hey, it says use IE, other browsers are not supported. Thats bad but.. whatever". Then it popped that she needs Java enabled - well, I guess we have to... Even updated it cause it was needed.
Restarted IE, clicked download again and... Java security blocked web app... Eh, I don't trust it but whatever, just let's check what if I whitelist it.
Got some basic view, 1 dropdown list for "file name format" (like anybody cares), path selection where to save file, and some checkbox. Lame, but let's just leave it behind.
Downloaded, it turned out to be html file, not pdf, fishy that it was single file, but hoped for some text styled with css, so I opened it and got redirected to page where I clicked download.
Checked that file content - html with empty body and script tag containing js that redirects on load.
One day I decided I wanted to build robots.
And not kidding the reason I wanted to build them was because I wanted someone interesting to talk to and stil not kidding I even fantasized about a robot girlfriend... Lame I know I think I was a lonely little guy back then, though even after 7 years or so it doesn't feel as though it's that long ago. Maybe because things didn't change that much. Which is worrying but it's not the topic so I will pass on that future-past worries bullcrapper. After learning how robots worked and what made them function so things gradually led up to me being more interested in machine learning applications and software. I learned Arduino at first, I think I still have some messy circuits and old arduinos around. I only finished one robot though and it couldn't even support it's own weight. The servo motors were taking too many amps that heated up the little arduino even with a fan attached. Provably I should have made use of mechanics for robots books and calculated things first. But even though it couldn't walk properly I still felt success and I loved it like my own kid (me taking it apart was questionable but believe me). After that I focused more on writing code than using my hands to make things which was a pain in the ass if I might add.
After learning arduino and making that failed project of mine. I then picked up C++ wrote hello world program usual things a starter would do. It was the language I wrote my first game which I finished and this time it worked. But I never released it which was partly because I didn't want to spend a hundred bucks on a license for the engine and I also knew that it was a shit game. If I were to describe; lines in different colors come from the top you need to hit the lines with the same colored columns to break them. The columns changed their height and location on random. The lines sped up and gap between them decreased. Now that I think about it it wasn't half bad. But the code was written in game maker studio's version of C so I have no way to salvage it.
But I learned a lot of things from that project and that was the goal, so I would call it a win. I don't remember but after sometime I switched to python. And I'm glad I did, it's fun to code in which was the main reason I coded in the first place. Fun.
Life happens and time passes,
Now I'm waiting to enter college exams in a few months after hopefully passing them. My goal is to get into computer engineering which will be extremely challenging because it's the highest point department in the university I'm aiming at. But hey if the challenge is great the reward is greater right ? To be honest I'm still not sure about my career path. Too many choices. So I will just let my own road called <millions of similarly random events that are actually caused by deterministic reactions, to affect you and your surroundings leading up to a future which only the Laplace's demon can forsee> guide me. Wish me luck.1
Before he began dropping the 20K proposed to remodel my flat, I told my father I much preferred a contractor who was recommended by someone I knew, as opposed to using a big corporation like Home Depot. FAMOUS LAST... a neighbour in my building highly recommended the contractor we chose. And, week 7 [or is it 8?] of what was proposed to take no longer than two weeks has begun afresh!
On Friday the fellow who is the owner of the contract remodeling company was here touching the paint. He was here because I forbade the two painters he sent to do the initial painting job.
My internet cut out suddenly around 1300 Friday. He set to leave for the weekend shortly after that. I mentioned the outage to him. The essence of his reply was that there was no way it could have had anything to do with him. The following day, my internet provider sent a tech out to diagnose the problem. What was the problem? The head of the remodeling firm removed a face plate from the wall where there were telephone wires and disconnect them when he tore the wires as he replaced the face plate.
Although the tech told me he wasn't going to charge my account the $85.00 fee for his services because the outage was caused within my flat, I wish to be sure of this. Which brings us to the punchline.
My internet provider is a lame ass business model, dreamed up by a squint-eyed ex-circus monkey, never well endowed in the top story, and now just plain sad.
There were some 911 outages in Washington State last Thursday night. All during the day Friday when you dialled their freephone #. the recorded announcement, before saying anything else, told you they were experiencing heavier than usual call volumes, and my wait would be greater than `10 minutes. Fine. What fried my La Croix silk was that after their customer service dept closed for the weekend, that outgoing message remained.
Today, I wanted to contact my provider to see if they would know if the $ was going to be charged to my account. After pressing the 'send' key, my computer came back with an error message, saying they were having technical difficulties. So, I went on over to the 'chat' page. There's nothing to click on to take me to this enfabled location. So, can't reach them by phone unless I want to hear, every 30 seconds whether or not I wish to, how sorry they are for my delay.
A few years ago I would've used this as an excuse to have a technicolour meltdown. The reason I'm posting this is that I am now able to see beforehand what I'll be doing to myself getting upset over the circumstances. When I do reach somebody, I'm going to tell them as lightly as possible, that if they were an airline, I wouldn't board any of their aircraft. Ever.
I was only doing it for fun and didn't see it as a career path and moved on to lame things. Now, years later, I'm kicking myself for thinking like that and having to learn all of the new shit I didn't keep up with and actually trying to make it a career.