It's Friday and guess what?

We are fucking deploying on prod!

I hate React Hooks. Jesus Christ, what the fuck was wrong with using states and components?? It’s like an entirely new fucking framework in itself.

So how does the the human brain ignore the second the?

- Family (and you) first. We’re all human, despite what our product manager is about to say to you.

Why is there a motification for upvotes but not downvotes. I wanna see which punk downvoted my comments and harass him online!

Life would be so easier if they start providing IDE in exams rather than writing all codes on sheets🥺🥺

boss: Why are you not producing enough output? If you don't bring enough to the table maybe you don't have a place in our company.

Me feeling burnt out already & trying to get through my own shit. It's not like we aren't releasing on time, the fact that they expect us to release 10+ things or something per month is insane.

My boss just LOVES to compare other people to somebody who produces more output.

When i managed my own team at my last job i was fair & understanding. Not like this asshole

YOOO Product owner if you don't specify which freaking page something doesn't work I CANNOT DO ANYTHING FOR YOU!!!!

No no no.
This newbie pings me for every thing !
It's fucking annoying !
And I'm annoyed with myself for still being nice !
I don't know if he's ever heard of searching for a solution online for even the most trivial problems !
He's not even aware of restarting something !
I have to tell him to do that !
He doesn't even read the help information for commands !
Why why why.

No matter how much you learn and practise, you're still going to break something.

So get on with learning, and break something huge!

- hold yourself accountable for your mistakes
- keep track your mistakes and learn from them
- put thought in what you do
- be organised
- become comfortable asking for and offering help
- realise that some problems have no universal solution
- don't just copy what others do, but also think for yourself
- learn to be patient

Lockdown extented to 21 days. I will be spending my time looking at this view.

*Website exists*

Client: “I should be rich by now. Please fix.”

Me: “... Did you do any ... marketing?”

Client: “I don’t have money for marketing. That’s what the website is for.”

You guys ever thought about the concept that our universe might be a simulation written by some alien kid for a school project and got a C- for it?

Yeah...perhaps I should go to sleep

*Working on app for client*
After review - “Can you make that font bigger?”
*Makes font larger*
After review a week later - “Can you make that font smaller?”
*Puts font back to original size*
Another review later on - “Can you make that font bigger?”
*Keeps font at same size and changes nothing*
Next review - “That new font size is perfect!”

My employer tried to install my app in his IPhone X and he scold me why the apk not supported. I explain to him that apk is for Android. He yelled :” don’t give me shit , you don’t have a degree on this so shut up, I do have, apk are universal because it is coded in Java

"Please disable AdBlock to view the content."

No. I'll just leave. Bye.

always proud of those 10 lines 👏

GUYS!!! SHE SAID "YES" !!!!

I'M SOOOO HAPPYYYYY!!!

All my dreams are becoming real! I was so nervous to ask, but it was worth it! I waited for the right moment, looked her in her eyes, she looked at mine.. And there I asked it: "are you willing to give it a try and install libreoffice instead of ms office?"

AND SHE SAID: "yes"!!!

Do I have the best wife or what!

End with 5 bugs, starts with 9.

Dear Recruiters: Java IS NOT JavaScript!!!
>:-(

I don’t even know the word epiphany

So, me and my girlfriend were on a discord call and she said to me: "You know how you can get lost in someone's eyes? Well, I get lost in your code".

I've never been more touched and conflicted in my life. 🥰🤨

Yeah right. Like I'm gonna tell null.

I have this interesting client who likes to end the weekly call with a prayer. Once he asked if I wanted to lead the prayer. I said, “No I’m good thanks. You should do it.”

Happy diwali to all of you developers...

console.log(typeof null);

Nowadays......¯\_(ツ)_/¯

When the doctor says "take this and comeback in 2 weeks" he is literally debugging his solution in your body.

I'm a bit freaked out.

Special place in hell for those who have autoplay video on their website, especially news sites