To all ya guys who stuck with terrible boss/manager/project/coworkers.

When your test data ends up in production

https://yorkshireeveningpost.co.uk/...

Easy.

I just worked a shitty manual labor job from 5am - 4pm Mon - Friday while going to night school. I told myself if I didn’t succeed in programming I would be stuck at that dead end job which would eventually lead to my own suicide. I kind of put myself in a position where getting good at coding was my only way out of a shitty/brutal lifestyle. It worked, as I now work from home and make twice as much money. It’s a funny thing to think about sometimes, two years ago I had to have knee surgery due to the physical strain of my former job job, and nowadays I sometimes get a neck cramp from not sitting up straight.

Moral of the story, sometimes growth can only happen when we put ourselves in uncomfortable situations.

I'm not even that old and I've had it with young cocksure, full of them self language/environment evangelists.

- "C# is always better than Java, don't bother learning it"

- "Lol python is all you need"

- "Omg windows/linux/mac sucks use this instead"

The list goes on really, at some point you have got to realize that while specialization is great, you have to learn a little bit of everything. It broadens you horizon a lot.

Yea, C# does some nifty stuff, but Java does too, learn both. Yea I'm sure Linux is better for hosting docker containers, but your clients are on mac or windows, learn to at least navigate and operate all three etc. Embrace knowledge from all the different tech camps it can only do you good and you will be so much more flexible and employable than your close minded peers :)

Hell even PHP has a lot to teach us (Even more than just to be a bad example, har har)

I bet you, this time will fucking come.

Minimum requirements for access this website:
CPU - 1.8 GHz Intel Core 2 Duo
RAM - 1 GB of ram
Hard Drive - 500 MB of free space
Video - 1 GB RAM

Recommended requirements for access this website:
CPU - 2.4 GHz Intel Quad Core
RAM - 2 GB
Hard Drive - 500 MB of free space
Video - 4 GB RAM

<requirements></requirements>

Damn

Can we get youtube subtitles for Indian English?

How not to design a modem...

Cables hide perfectly - inside the wall...

To all the leaders out there: Stop doing all shit on your own! Delegate! Have fate in your colleagues!
And fuck all shitty deadlines if no lives are at stake.
Cz yours is for sure!

...or you'll end like me with a heart attack at the age of 43.

Now i'm here at a health-care-hotel (dunno what it's called in english) for 3 weeks relaxing and doing programming w/o being stressed at all. =)

To all the devRant community:

After a lot of work during the last month, I finally got to release my first game on the App Store!!!.

I would appreciate any feedback! I will keep adding more content and releasing new updates based on your comments!

Thank You!

https://apps.apple.com/us/app/...

When I got positive feedback from senior and lead software engineers in PS4. They were in Namco before, and developed the games I played when I was like 8-9. Real life heroes.
It was a technically complex collaboration, tight deadlines and 0 documentation in places where it was crucial. I was the only one they mentioned specifically for good work, and the only one who got a gift from them when they came to visit :)

Accidentally deleted a file I needed ... found it still open in VSCode editor.

A part of me still love code.
A part of me already bored with it.

Social Distancing is now a good thing.

Suddenly, my greatest skill is in high demand.

Hi,

Oh man, what an unfuckingbelievible situation when you are activating
1) new user account
2) for new cellphone
3) with freshly issued SIM card.
You're waiting for your goddamn verification code to sent to phone. And you wait, and nothing happens and you click "send new code" until you get warning that too many codes has been requested. Then you start good ole debugging. You browse forums, help pages- try this and that, nothing ever works. But you keep trying for two friggin sequential nights. Guess what, you li'l fuckface, you're debugging wrong thing, because suddenly, only the man in the sky knows why, you get an urge to ask someone else to call you and when they do it they hear that your number is temporarily closed. No, the bills are fine, you can call and send messages from that very number, but all the motherfucking incoming traffic is blocked.
That's why you didn't get your verification codes, bitch.

Thanks for nothing, carrier.

The guy after me.

The comments make a lot of sense.

And above all; watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you; because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic; will never find it.
- Roald Dahl

It was sometime in 2009. I kept seeing these ads for something called Bitcoin. I had some extra cash, so I decided to buy $100 worth. I had my debit card out, and was trying to figure out how it worked. Got distracted with a work email, and decided to put it off until later. I forgot all about it until around 2013 when I read about some guy that bought a house using $70 worth of Bitcoin he bought in 2009.

!rant

God bless Gynvael and content creators like him.

See my awesome WhatsApp API using web automation.

I'm selling it though.

So friend is making this key-value app with Thunkable for people with dementia. We're just unlocking our bikes when he wonders "what if they forget they installed the app?".

I suggest push notifications but cos he's using Thunkable FREE he'd have to pay £200 for that.

So he says he'd "F*CKING SPAM THEM WITH EMAILS" instead!

ps his APK is 30MB

During a health and safety course today I was asked to talk about the workspace ergonomics. Part of that course is to make sure everyone knows how to customise their seat, screen, keyboard, etc., so I told everyone to unfold those little feet on the bottom of their keyboards and everyone did... Everyone but a cheeky little customer service girl who was more interested in taking selfies of her skirt coincidentally matching the carpet. I cleared my throat and said again:

- "Please, unfold your keyboard's feet."

Nothing. Coughed. Nothing. Finally, quite annoyed, I repeated myself for the 3rd time:

- "Unfold the feet, please!"

She jumped. Eyes wide. Noticed everyone staring. And very very slowly, with a look of complete puzzlement, she spread her legs.

............

........................my mom has been diagnosed with cancer. she had one years ago and won. now it is back again. there is so much shit happening in my life already that the last fucking thing i need is a worry about cancer on top of all the fucking problems i alresdy have..................

hello depressing day we meet again

Oh my gawd, it's only been years since this should have been a thing.

But today, since no ones beat me to it, let me share Github's official mobile app - currently taking beta signups for both IOS and Android.

https://github.com/mobile

I'm getting really tired of those dumbass programmers that do not understand shit and then come to me when production breaks. (I am also a programmer, not really a DevOps engineer, but I'm the least worst at DevOps stuff, so it's my job...).

We're programming some kind of document management tool. Today we had a release, and one of the new features is to download all of your documents as a zip file, which is asynchronuously generated. When it's done, the user gets a mail with the download link to the zip file.

The feature works basically, but today it broke our production service, as somebody was running a test of it.

Turns out all the documents are loaded into memory to be zipped. So if you have 2 gigs of documents, a container with memory restrictions in that area will crash.

I asked the programmer who reported this «ops problem» to me, why he didn't just shit the files into a temp foler in order to zip them in there.

He told me that he wanted to do so, but did not know how to mock this for a unit test, and therefore went to the in-memory «solution», which was easier for him to mock.

For fuck's sake, unit tests and mocks are fucking tools, not ends in itself! I don't give a fuck about your pointless mocking code when the application crashes!

When I got to deal with such dumbasses, I'd prefer to mock those motherfuckers with a leaky bucket of liquid shit, which basically accomplishes the same task from my perspective: dripping shit all over the place and make everything suck as fuck.

All the uni projects

Y'all ever listen to a webinar and their mɨȼɍøᵽħønɇ ɉᵾsŧ ɍȺnđømłɏ fucks up for a minute and scares the shit out of you?

I've been trying to add a click listener to this image of john cena but I keep getting a NullPointerException, somebody help!!!!

I've been lurking around this place for months now and never found a reason to make an account. Well, now I just did.

I was browsing freelancer.com looking for projects and I found one. Guy wants a website for booking seats, with a shopping cart and whatever. At the end, he mentions the only restrictions are we can't use ajax and json.

I made a bid explaining that the very site he was on(the freelancer website) made more then 25 ajax requests when loading a page, and that most if not all of them were transferring data in json.

I'm wondering what do they need that many requests for, but that's already another issue.

Now I'm curious to see if he answers back