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Search - "modem"
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Me brute forcing into the appartment (where i rent my room) modem:
*tries all most easy/logical combinations*
Nope.
*tries more difficult ones*
Nope.
*hmm.... no please not both just blank....... 😷*
Admin access granted.
😩11 -
Linux sucks.
Now now, chill. I'm using it as my main OS for a few years now. I know what I'm talking and this title is a bit click-baity, but this just has to go out there:
1. It's usable as a Windows replacement just fine - FALSE. XFCE4 is years old and buggy as hell especially on multi-monitor set-up, Gnome3 gets stuck more often than my Windows 98 machine used to, KDE is like a rich kid on meth. Plug in Bluetooth headphones? Well no, sorry, you have to research that online, since you'll probably need to install some packages for it to work. Did I say "work"? Well no, because after more research you realize that Debian on Gnome3 on gdm3 launches pulseaudio on its own, so you have 2 instances of pulseaudio, and one of them is stealing your headphones sometimes and you either have no sound or shitty sound. How do I know that you ask? The same way I know everything else - every time you try to do something new on any Linux, it involves a ton of research. Exciting research, don't get me wrong, but at this point it looks more like a toy than a reliable desktop computer operating system.
2. And why am I using pulseaudio? Why not alsa? years ago people were discussing on forums that pulseaudio is old and dead, yet here we are with new LTS release of Ubuntu still shining with Pulseaudio. How about several different service management systems being deprecated by new ones, each having different configurations and calling methods? Apparently systemd is old and lame now. It's a mix of 10 year old software that works badly, with a 5 year old replacement that works worse, somehow trying to live under the same roof. Does it work? Ask my headphones who sound like a fucking dial-up modem.
3. Let's talk about displays, shall we? xorg is old and deprecated, right? We got Wayland that's mostly stable. Don't know what that is? That's just basic knowledge for Linux. And when you try to install network-manager, it also tries to install Mir toolkits. Because why the fuck not install 3 display managers when you want a network manager, of which one is old and dying, one is young and stupid, and another is an infant that died of cancer?
4. Want to integrate with Google Drive? Yeah, there's a tool that mounts the drive as a local directory. Yeah only for Ubuntu. Want it on Debian? You need to compile it. Oh wait, it's on Ocaml, because fuck mainstream languages, we're hipsters. How do you compile Ocaml? Well you need to have Ocaml on your system, dummy. How do you do that? Well you need to compile Ocaml. Ok, how do I do that? Well, git clone, download and install some dependencies, configure, make... oh sorry, you're using libssl1.0.2g when you need libssl1.0.1f, nope, sorry, won't work. Want to install libssl1.0.1f? Why? You already have the "g", stupid! Want to remove libssl1.0.2g? Bye-bye literally everything that you have on your PC. But at least you got the "f". Does it work now? Well no, because you need libssl1.0.2g for another dependency to work.
And all I ever wanted was to get a fucking document from google drive (not nudes, I promise).
5. Want to watch a movie? Let me tear that screen in half and make the bottom half late by a couple of frames, because who needs vertical sync, right? Oh you do? Well install the native drivers maybe. Oh you have? Welcome to eternal Boot to Recovery mode, motherfucka!
---------------------------------
Yeah, most of the times things work just fine. But the reason I know what those things are and how they work is not curiosity. The reason that I know the inner workings of Linux much better than the inner workings of Windows, is because in those few years that I've been using it full time, it has caused me 10 times more headache than I have ever experienced with other systems. And it's not the usual annoyances like "OMG it rebooted when I didn't ask it to", but more like "Oh, it won't work and I need 2 days to find out why" kind of stuff, because even if you experience the same thing again, it's always caused by some new shit and the old solution won't work any more.
I still love it, and will continue to use it. I don't know why really. Maybe because I'm not afraid of fucking it up any more? Maybe because I can do what I want in it and recovering will be easier than on Windows?
It's a toy for me, after all these years. And I also use it for professional reasons.
But whenever someone presents it as a better alternative to Windows, I just want to puke.51 -
I wrote a Student Information system for my midterm project back in 94 written in Clipper and runs on MS-DOS.
I demoed & explained to the panel of professors how it tracks enrollments, payments, class schedules, grades and attendance of each and every student. Has user authentication, auditing and reporting functionalities.
It has a lite version also written in Clipper that can be installed on a Professor's laptop so that he/she can update records even at home, and would be able to sync with the db at school via a BBS. Telix for DOS (self-taught) was my choice for the BBS as it was shareware, has built-in Zmodem support and comes with it's own programming language called SALT (Script Application Language for Telix) that can be used for automating tasks. The lite version of my project would dump the updates on an ASCII file, compress the file using PKZIP, use the laptop's modem to dial-up the number to the school's BBS and send the file across using Zmodem protocol.
The main version would then download the file(s) from the BBS and proceed to do a sync.
After the doing the demo and answering all their questions the panel asked me to wait outside the room, called me back in after 15mins and told me that I don't have to attend that class for the remainder of the term. The happiness as the my classmates outside of the room gawked at me felt like King Midas himself gave my balls his golden touch.
Then in 97, 2yrs after I graduated, I accompanied my cousins to a different campus of the same school for their enrollment and right there on the bottom of the screen were my initials on a very very familiar UI! They actually used, and were still using, my school project. Needless to say my cousins didn't believe that it was written by me.15 -
A Geologist and an engineer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the Engineer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Engineer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Engineer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Engineer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Engineer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the Engineer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The Engineer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the Engineer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the Engineer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.1 -
Lost the password to the main modem/router of our apartment (live in a normal flat of which the rooms are rented out to three students and me) which is in my room and tried to reset the fucker for a trillion times but couldn't get back in, the password didn't reset.
Took a closer look at the reset button and suddenly noticed some text under it saying "wireless connect". Then I noticed a tiny round "hole" above the reset text.
Fuck my sideways, I've been pressing the "wireless connect" button instead of the actual reset one every goddamn time 😐
I can now port forward again 😊6 -
Some kid in my class just legit asked the teacher what a router and a modem is.
The thing is: the teacher didnt even know.12 -
6 hours into a 124gb upload and then the internet goes out due to a malfunctioning modem.
Just. Fucking. Great.6 -
Tried to switch to Manjaro from Ubuntu.
Everything good except ethernet not working.
3 hours wasted, updated the kernel, three network managers changed, realised that the ethernet wire was loose at the modem end.
FML.11 -
A Geologist and a developer are sitting next to each other on a long flight from LA to NY. The Geologist leans over to the developer and asks if he would like to play a fun game. The Developer just wants to take a nap, so he politely declines and rolls over to the window to catch a few winks. The Geologist persists and explains that the game is real easy and a lotta fun. He explains, "I ask you a question, and if you don't know the answer, you pay me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $5." Again, the Developer politely declines and tries to get to sleep. The Geologist now somewhat agitated, says, "OK, if you don't know the answer you pay me $5, and if I don't know the answer, I'll pay you $50!"
This catches the Developer's attention, and he sees no end to this torment unless he plays, so he agrees to the game. The Geologist asks the first question. "What's the distance from the Earth to the moon?"
The Developer doesn't say a word, but reaches into his wallet, pulls out a five dollar bill and hands it to the Geologist.
Now, it's the developer's turn. He asks the Geologist, "What goes up a hill with three legs, and comes down on four?" The Geologist looks up at him with a puzzled look. He takes out his laptop computer and searches all of his references. He taps into the Airphone with his modem and searches the net and the Library of Congress. Frustrated, he sends e-mail to his co-workers -- all to no avail.
After about an hour, he wakes the Engineer and hands him $50. The developer politely takes the $50 and turns away to try to get back to sleep.
The Geologist is more than a little miffed, shakes the developer and asks, "Well, so what's the answer?"
Without a word, the developer reaches into his wallet, hands the Geologist $5, and turns away to get back to sleep.3 -
Lost half a work day because of an ISP outage. (Testing mailers doesn't work without a connection)
Turns out it was a loose cable on our modem that happened to coincide with the ISP outage elsewhere.
Ugh.1 -
I die, go to hell and my punishment is to write software for hell network that is having power problems due to light source disruptions and is running on Windows 95 on FAT32 without any service pack.
Network speed is trough 300bps dial up modem. Protocol is over IPX/SPX.
My task is to write interactive websites that are replacement of modern websites but in VBScript, ActiveX, IE 4.0.
I have 10 managers that tell me what to do and scream when I miss deadline that is set everyday without my knowledge at random times.
They send me an email and 5 minutes later they arrive at my desk to ask me about it.
I must work 16 hours a day before I can leave the place and if I won’t show up police beats me and escorts me to the office.
If I’m late a second I don’t get payment.
I can’t afford to rent a place so I sleep in the sleeping bag.
It doesn’t matter much cause as soon as I fall asleep phone rings until I wake up and my manager screams about the problems he have for about an hour.6 -
Me: The phone rings but when I pick up there's nothing there.
Indian call center: Okay sir can you tell me if the landline is plugged into the modem
Me: It's ringing. Yes, it's plugged in.
Indian call center: Okay we'll reset the modem.
Me: I already did that. Twice. Just to be able to speak to you because the robot made me.
Indian call center: Okay so we'll reset your modem again.
*resets*
Indian call center: Do you get a dial tone now?
Me: Yes. I have this entire time. No one can call me.
Indian call center: Sir that is not possible.
Me: Call it and see for yourself.
Indian call center: *calls, phone hangs up for them the second I answer*
Why did you hang up on me, sir?
Me: *internal screaming*3 -
Me, explaining to my wife the difference between WiFi and Cellular as I explain why I need put the Pi from that other thread between our modem and router (and take our WiFi down) all so I can finally answer her repeated questions of "Where is all our data going???"8
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oh god. I just heard an abrupt noise emit from a pc I was told to fix that could only be described as R2-D2 fucking a 56k modem5
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So I been telling Cox no to upgrading my modem for the past 2 months, my modem works fine, so now last night the modem just stops working, the internet is out and I call support, I tell them the problem and they without even thinking ask what version of modem I have, I tell then gen 2,they then offered a upgrade for free and the old gen 2 ones were not working lately, I reluctantly agreed to swap them for free, so after I got off the phone I was curious, I decided to packet sniff and find all my data is being sent just fine, but once it reaches the Cox main gateway it just drops the packet, I even pinged the DNS and it responded fine, turns out they just shut my connection off and basically forced me to upgrade to their gen 3 enhanced Wi-Fi bullshit8
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So my ISP just called me again that I'm sending plenty of spam. This time, I have all flows logged, so I know for sure that it wasn't my TV (only vulnerable device with internet access) and as my switch was offline there is nothing in front of my router anymore. And I learned that all the spam was going directly to their smtp server which I never used and didn't even know they have some. All in all everything points to their cable modem. Will tell them that in response to the mail they promised to send me. Really looking forward to new at least a little bit competent ISP (alternative should be available soon).3
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Just got an email accusing me of not implementing a feature that is quite clearly implemented.
It's not my fault if your too stupid to #include my header file. Did you just expect the compiler to magically find the functions for you.
Also thanks for raising this with my team lead and his boss.
May you spend eternity in a cold ditch coding java script on a 386 with a 28k modem you disgusting fuck nugget.5 -
Yeah Apple, fuck up your SECOND Xcode release in a SINGLE WEEK and make me download ANOTHER 7 GIGABYTES (I've grown up with a 2.4 KBITS/S modem!) for what's probably a ONE-LINER FIX in your bloated SHIT!4
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'Twas a fun day today...
Construction workers cut into the fiber line to a medium sized company this morning. We got the splicer guy on site quickly, but it is going to take a while, because the whole cable needs to be extended a bit in order to repair it. We got the company online through a LTE modem for the repair duration. Oh and also had to set up VPN on all PCs to connect to their server in our datacenter. A fun day indeed.9 -
The stranges computer error I have seen.
When modems still was the way you communicated I worked with support.
We where the general distributor for TDC's PCCard modems.
One day we got a computer with modem with intermittent problems (worst kind).
After much trial and error we found that stroking the computer lightly in the top right corner made the modem work perfectly :)
Cause will be reviled later :p4 -
Certified Enganeers: 0, Internet Connectivity Issues: 1
Those idiots couldn't even understand why I'd connected a second router (a DLink DIR 816) for better WiFi than their default garbage modem/router. And one of them told me that he'd login to the router by "putting the address in Google" (and proceeded to type 192.168.1.251 in the search bar, after I explained to him that Firefox was a browser too, just like Chrome -.-)
And they didn't even fix the problem, which is most probably on their end since everything checks out here. Brilliant. More shitty 3G/4G for me.
YOU CERTIFIED PIECES OF CRAP4 -
Since I already posted images of my desktop setups at work(Mac) and home(Linux), I didn't want to repost this week. So, to keep it at least mildly interesting, here's a shot of my garage networking setup.
Pictured:
Ubiquiti Edgerouter-L
Ubiquiti UAP-AC Lite
Drobo 5N
TP-Link cable modem
A big UPS, so we'll still have wifi during a power outage, since that's apparently important
A couple of older machines I'm working on when I have time
A Philips Hue Bridge
An unremarkable 7-port switch
An Ooma phone device
A shitload of my wife's stuff that she's left there on her way in and out of the house.6 -
!dev
And again...
Our ISP doesn’t say it blocks any port on our Business Fixed IP. Currently I’m trying to access port 25 for SMTP. Guess what? Indeed port blocked. Called them “The port is open”, I visit a port checked, the same thing “Port Closed”
Always the fucking same thing. Every fcking time. These are just criminals. Lastly I removed their router, that they mentions was the only working router in our house and our signal from the other router, not provided by them was much better. They blocked the hotspots because we removed the router then. Guess what? On their site is an option Enable Hotspot on your home router (this enables your access to hotspots). Just pressed it. Haaa they can’t acces my router to set that up and it works.
In our second home, we have another ISP, Proximus, first they did difficult to come and install everything. Because in the appartment the previous owners didn’t pay the bills. After a week or so someone came to install it. Because they cut the cables couldn’t do it myself. Ok it worked for some time. After 3-4 months by once I can’t access the camera there, strange. My uncle went there and there was no internet. Neither TV. But we never received any invoice. Because they didn’t send them. We contacted them, no response. My father sends them an email, with politic people in copy and by once they called to say they will turn it back and scrap the invoices that were not send. They said no technician needed to come, as it’s second home. Guess what, next day a message came “We will arrive in less than an hour”
My uncle went. They did nothing, only restart the modem.
There still was no internet after two days after they came. We called back, response was: “There wasn’t anyone.” Yeah right, we have proof of a technicial that passed (Local Video). By once the internet worked.
Now 4 months later, still didn’t receive any invoice, neither via post or email.
Fuck those criminals, called ISPs20 -
After moving, I don't have DSL yet so I have to use mobile data to get internet access. Additionally I had to finish a freelancing job. In Germany you have one of the most expensive and least reliable mobile networks in europe.
I had to upload my develpoed software to a remote server
So I suddenly was sent back in time. A single call would have disrupted the download (I can't use internet and phone at the same time, might be a phone issue). While my phone has "high speed" volume left and showed at least HSPA, but I still, the upload rate was prehistoric:7 -
If enough competent developers got jobs at Comcast all at once we could overthrow management and make the internet better one cable modem at a time.1
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I added some boards to this fucking Beowolf of a fucking Raspberry Pi!
Pi with 4GB RAM, 2TB SSD, 8 USB ports, 2 Ethernet ports, and a sense hat.
Gonna put this between my modem and router and see what fun I can get up to.
Would like to build a web portal that tracks my family's data usage with the tcpdump to graph approach, and probably a little weather widget to go with it using the sense hat.9 -
What kinda blockhead moron at my ISP decided that I require a new modem & router that is managed by THEM! I'm not really baffled by the privacy concerns but more about that I am unable to manage my home network. I literally cant open ports, manage ip adresses and do other shit I NEED FOR WORKING AT HOME.
I cant print!
I cant read mail!
I cant access my network drives!
My website is down!
Colleagues are asking why the Minecraft server is offline!
And using the new brick they gave me as a modem only, is not possible as there is no setting to be found to turn the router off!
And if I call their imbecile's of support they tell my that if they change a setting, that my phone will disconnect. (The phone line is also connected to the modem!) And right after the support guy said that and wanted to start explaing me further steps, his settings apply and I get kicked off the line. Bruh! You knew this would happen so why didnt you work around it?!?!?!!
Thing is, this new modem isnt even necessary as it doesnt use a different standard like fiber for example.
If I cant figure out how to get my stuff to work again, I swear to god I will turn on full Karen mode and ramble into their next store looking to get some manager fired!
(Ill post an update soon!)7 -
I remember seeing my dad's computer and modem. He never let me touch it, so I made my own pretend laptop and modem out of scrap paper. 😂
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!rant
I want to present to you:
My new server closet!
It's called "SaaSBox" from a German meme. Pls don't rate my cable management 😂
It isn't finished jet there is missing an AP and a dedicated modem.16 -
Fucking hell my ISP gave me a router and a modem (was expecting a modem that is a router, like is at my parents house with the same ISP).
The router is absolute dog shit. My connection drops every 5 minutes or so, and sometimes every minute (give or take 10 seconds). And the signal struggles in my bedroom, even though the router is about 10 feet away from me.
What the fuck piece of garbage is this? -
Every night around midnight my internet turns to shit, ping jumps to 1000ms ... Lasts for a few hours.
Only tech support available at that time is cheapest call center in Bombay
"Okay please sir I am running the tests now please. Nothing is wrong sir from my end"
"Oh? What's the latency from your end to my modem?"
".... Sir I am runnings the tests..."
Bah! It's whack...5 -
The networking closet I had the pleasure of working in most of last night. That's all very loud, very warm air compressors at the bottom, and the switch, firewall, and modem up near the top. And all they had was a small step stool...
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Frustration Rant!
Because old hardware means learning the hard way sometimes, I've had to purchase more goodies.
On my last update, I installed the rs232 shield which may have inadvertently been wired backwards for Tx/Rx from what im used to. I assume it is backwards to most db9 serial ports because most Arduino or other projects you would do with a pi have serial "in" connections like old routers and devices that would be "controlled" rather than the other way around. Anyway, according to a video on youtube showing a guy turning an old machine into an IRC client via raspberry pi, this shield may be swapped. That means that instead of interfacing with the old machine via a null modem crossover cable, I need a straight cable with male db9 on both ends. I unfortunately tried using the null modem crossover cable which was reversing the reversed pins all over again. I hope these next few days are more fruitful now that I've bought a straight cable and db9/25 adapter.
The good thing is that I managed to get the pi to recognize its new serial port. I also dusted off my DOS skills and my serial card in the 5150 seems to work.
I literally banged my head after nothing worked. Im hoping that the tx/ Rx is solved soon.
Oh and that AT to PS/2 adapter will allow me to use by IBM original Model M Keyboarf rather than the fun model F. -
Samsung Smart TV becomes Samsung Dumb TV.
Welcome back dear readers, to the next installment of my Raspberry Pi / Pi Hole / MitM box adventure!
For those of you who are new to this story, I'm a long experience programmer who knows very little about his home network or networking in general and has constantly been going over his 250GB data plan because 'rona, and thus, wants answers to "where is the data going".
So, I got the Pi, codenamed Mini-Beowolf, positioned between the modem and router... worked some fuckin systemd.networkd magic (which was sort of easy... but was hard cause I'm new to it) and viola, this son of a bitch passes through the ethernet and doesn't even show up on the router. Fu-King Beastly, I love it.
Now to static IP all my devices so I fire up my trusty TP-Link admin portal. I should add here... I've visited this admin about a total of 10 minutes prior to this when I set this wifi router up and just let it do DHCP.
So I'm getting to know my admin portal... I've got most of my devices connected to reserved IPs... and I find this one fuckin device reporting as "localhost".
Now, I've got a MAMP install... but it hasn't been running. But still I thought for sure it was just MAMP run a bit amok.
But no... it was my fucking Samsung "Smart" TV. That piece of shit is, and apparently has been reporting its device name as, sure as shit, fucking "localhost"... PROBABLY FOR YEARS.
Now, IDK how that didn't cause me any major problems over the years, and I read quite a few forums about people who it did mess up their network. So I resolved to rename the Samsung TV device.
I found the spot in the network settings of the TV... I changed the name from the pick list of rooms in a house like "Living Room" and "Bed Room", then I tried entering my own device name. But no matter what I picked, or no matter how many times I restarted/reset that TV the network name is ALWAYS "localhost".
Even though somehow my network survived this long... I'm not standing for that shit.
My Samsung TV is now blocked COMPLETELY at the router level. (After I ran one last factory reset and update)
The kicker? That Pi I built has a Samsung SSD... so I'm blocking Samsung WITH FUCKING SAMSUNG.
Needless to say, these are likely among my last Samsung purchases.
Join me next time when I FINALLY try to turn Pi Hole on and then get a tcpdump (or some other lesser output from the tcp stream) going.16 -
Well that's it folks,
Australia has started to shutdown and become the isolated island it once was again, even more so with states shutting down independently.
Atleast we have the intern -
fuck, got to reboot the modem... ... ... ... ... ... ... ...
where was i, oh yea -
internet right? It's not like the NBN wasn't designed to have every fucking Aussie using it at once or anything 🙄
https://abc.net.au/news/2020-03-22/...rant covid19 wk200 aussies don't do isolation well shutting down the nation nbn won't handle this shit5 -
!dev
So after 5 months of complaining and ISP denying that the modem was at fault for the issues ("because they'd get more complaints if it was") while trying to rip us off as well[1], they finally gave in to sending us one of the modems "intended for their business users"[2].
Low and behold... I haven't had any issues yet in the past few days (as opposed to having issues between 3 and 8 times a day).
Nah lads, surely wasn't the piece of shit old modem that is known to have a severe design flaw right? :^)
Must have been my router and devices behind it right? :^)
References:
1: https://devrant.com/rants/4378988/...
2: https://devrant.com/rants/4399477/...2 -
If you ask me to run your reports, saying that it's urgent, then leave for a week's vacation, I will throttle your bandwidth to that of a 1200 baud modem for the next 3 months.
-
Three days after I purchased iPhone XS, I had to install a new modem at home. The phone wouldn’t connect to the wifi network in the higher frequency band. The guy who came to install the modem dished out the theory that the phone must be too damn old to support it. That burn!
PS: it connected almost a couple of seconds later that. As if it was some kind of extra layer of authentication. Well played Apple.6 -
We code hard in these cubicles
My style’s nerd-chic, I’m a programmin’ freak
We code hard in these cubicles
Only two hours to your deadline?
Don’t sweat my technique.
Sippin’ morning coffee with that JAVA swirl.
Born to code; my first words were “Hello World”
Since 95, been JAVA codin’ stayin’ proud
Started on floppy disks, now we take it to the cloud.
On my desktop, JAVA’s what’s bobbin’ and weavin’
We got another winning app before I get to OddEven.
Blazin’ code like a forest fire, climbin’ a tree
Setting standards like I Triple E….
Boot it on up, I use the force like Luke,
Got so much love for my homeboy Duke.
GNU Public Licensed, it’s open source,
Stop by my desk when you need a crash course
Written once and my script runs anywhere,
Straight thuggin’, mean muggin’ in my Aeron chair.
All the best lines of code, you know I wrote ‘em
I’ll run you out of town on your dial-up modem.
Cause…
We code hard in these cubicles
Me and my crew code hyphy hardcore
We code hard in these cubicles
It’s been more than 10 years since I’ve seen the 404.
Inheriting a project can make me go beeee-serk
Ain’t got four hours to transfer their Framework.
The cleaners killed the lights, Man, that ain’t nice,
Gonna knock this program out, just like Kimbo Slice
I program all night, just like a champ,
Look alive under this IKEA lamp.
I code HARDER in the midnight hour,
E7 on the vending machine fuels my power.
Ps3 to Smartphones, our code use never ends,
JAVA’s there when I beat you in “Words with Friends”.
My developing skills are so fresh please discuss,
You better step your game up on that C++.
We know better than to use Dot N-E-T,
Even Dan Brown can’t code as hard as me.
You know JAVA’s gettin’ bigger, that’s a promise not a threat,
Let me code it on your brain
We code hard in these cubicles,
it’s the core component…of what we implement.
We code hard in these cubicles,
Straight to your JAVA Runtime Environment.
We code hard in these cubicles,
Keep the syntax light and the algorithm tight.
We code hard in these cubicles,
Gotta use JAVA if it’s gonna run right.
We code hard in these cubicles
JAVA keeps adapting, you know it’s built to last.
We code hard in these cubicles,
Robust and secure, so our swag’s on blast
CODE HARD10 -
Things that I "shouldn't" put in the code:
cout << "Starting bitcoin harvester..."
cout << "Contacting IP 95.24.69.42..."
cout << "Passing control to remote IP"
Also, my boss wanted me to merge to master. I want to tell him my difficulties:
"Had issues with fluix inhibitor for the linker. Had to stretch the void pointer vector to fit the elongated float system. This helped with the binary pretranscompiler moderator in the remote modem configurator. Now everything is working fine."6 -
!dev
ISP: "We are going to give you this piece of garbage Puma6 modem that will cause your internet to randomly die because we want to save a few bucks instead of actually having it function properly"
Me: "Can I replace it with my own?"
ISP: "No?"
I love not having fibre.
So either I shoot myself in the foot by going to another ISP (meaning I'll get *at best* 1/5th of the speed, while my current speed already is a severe bottleneck) or I have to keep content with this fucking piece of garbage internet that decides to commit sudoku over nothing...7 -
Restored from my backup. My home town 2004 setup, floppy disk drives, sound blaster audio card, dial up us robotics modem, nokia 3310 on the chair, lg hifi with cassette tape and cd, unitra amplifier, equalizer and sound columns. Panorama made using olympus c-720 uz.
Funny times ^^
Edit:
high res image
https://vane.pl/content/images/...4 -
First modem : can't connect to the internet
Second modem : can't activate the wifi
Third modem : can't connect to the internet
Please kill me2 -
So, I move house with my amazing, already configured and stable router with built in VPN, DDNS, Port forwarding and DHCP addresses.
Received ISP shitty router at new address and want to use as modem only, so I go read the manual.
"Bridge mode requires you to configure your other router with PPPoE and the ISP's credentials"
Landline is not working, so I cannot call the number to retrieve my password. After 2 days of waiting, engineer visits, installs master socket, dial tone yaaay.
Call number to get password, automated voice message has such a bad sound quality that I cannot figure out if it's saying F or S, and there are two of those letters.
Put ISP router in bridge mode, set other router to PPPoE and put credentials, nothing. Try with F and F, S and F, F and S, S and S... Nothing. Put it back to dynamic IP address, it works.
I resign myself and manually configure everything I had on the good router to the ISP one. A few issues with my server and DDNS, but hey, internet works.
Start missing the other functionality, try the password idiocy again. Nothing.
Next day, go to work, talk to a colleague that lives close and has the same provider: "I just put it into bridge mode and it worked".
Go back home, bridge mode on ISP router, Dynamic IP on good router, no credentials. It works.
Why do I always overcomplicate stuff?4 -
Rant on me myself.
After being a professional coder (ie having a bachelor degree) for 11 years now, I finally have a decent and reasonable backup.
I use borg to backup to my raid 1, which is local, in my corridor near the ceiling. I use a Intel NUC with two external USB3 HDDs attatched. As I already had data on them, I went for a btrfs raid 1.
The second level of my backup solution is my brother. It's 50km to his flat. He's got a banana pi with my third HDD attached. I connect to his pi via VPN. The VPN is done via an AVM Fritz! Box. No ads, I just like those boxes (modem and router).
The backup is encrypted, of course.
Now, after ten years, I finally got a decent backup solution. Wow. This feels great! 😎 -
I'll post a rant (will be long) soon-ish on the root of the asinine problem...
TL;DR
Anyone got a better suggestion of killing a WLAN router signal than a Faraday Cage?
-----------------------
As to the point as I can manage atm...
My ISP forces a proprietary router/modem for them to script my static IPv4 block (/28, aka 13 usable). Modifying this equipment in any way or using the vast majority of tactics to modify its behaviour = Federal Felony... with my history, it couldn't be construed as mistake/ignorance of this fact, so I'd likely end up working for some branch of the gov to mitigate the costs of standard prison (on both ends... handicapped af = expensive af to comply with base human rights laws... plus I'd be a dangerous prisoner from what I've been told).
I NEED the ipv6 functionality TOTALLY off... I've written this into every kernel and every container config at kernel level.
The issue is, I don't trust their shit device (which "should" also be set to no ipv6 via gui... non-GUI = fed felony).
This horrid device, they apparently made them for home use initially (to be fair it has decent specs and tolerable RAM), so included WiFi... that comes on by itself.
Disable the WiFi!... except I cant (at least not without 'tampering').
Why? Well acc to the GUI it's not enabled in the first place. Acc to the 'tech support' it's apparently a paid feature (yes, nonsense) that I have not paid for (nor would I), meaning on their end's GUI and DBs I also don't have WiFi ability from that dev.
So... Not trusting the other settings and the dev, being something im not allowed to directly config outside of their GUI that doesn't realise it's putting out a usable signal despite registering DHCP on behalf of that non-existent signal. I NEED to kill those signals.
I realise it likely sounds extreme to make and use a Faraday Cage for a router/modem (secondary modem, it parses the initial modem's output, via script, to allow the static block to be accessed). I really dont know any other way that's legal to restrict it.
Oh, in case unclear, I have tried so many ways to get them to just allow me to use any device (pref. mine, but even their's) that i can simply script myself... it's a no-go.20 -
Last week I wired up my home network (including custom modem and routers) myself, because the stuff my ISP wanted me to use was garbage.
Luckily Germany has "router-freedom" so ISPs are not allowed to force us to use their device to dial into the network.
I did everything myself, because the 'technicians' they kept sending me were just idiots who didn't know anything, considering the highly paid job they are doing. Usually they told me, to get the device from my ISP, because my "Router" (actually a business grade, standalone Modem by Cisco, to feed my Router) didn't even have WiFi ( lol ). Also all Technicians didn't arrive at the agreed date but at some other time. I wasn't able to wait any longer.
So I did it myself.
Consider me something more like a student of theoretical computer science. Not actually supposed to be experienced with hardware stuff.
The ISP is serving me with a DOCSIS 3.0 Network based on the television cable network in my city. For some reason they are providing the internet-access to only one socket in the apartment, which has a rather uncommon "WICLIC" connector. After having trouble getting an adapter for WICLIC to common coaxial F-Connectors (used by every DOCSIS-Modem), I made one myself.
After setting up everything (not that hard, once the connectors fit) my modem told me, that, while I'm perfectly connected to the ISPs internal Network, I still can't access the internet.
So I called the ISP...
After getting ranted at, about that what I'm doing is illegal and only certified employees are allowed to do this and I will break more, than actually do good and that I can't just connect my own "Router" (again I needed to correct her: Modem) I hang up the phone.
Also she accused me of hacking their devices because I'm not supposed to see my IP address... (My Modem told me on its web interface. I didn't even need telnet for that.)
I went to the ISPs head office, told the first desk as many technical terms as I could remember and got forwarded to something like the main technician.
He was a really nice guy. The only sane and qualified person I dealt with at this company. He asked me for my Address and Device Model, I told him my MAC and last internal IP, I had seen and he activated my internet access within a minute.
We talked a while about the stupid connector that ISP is using in the homes and he gifted me some nicer adapters to connect my modem to the wall.
Why do ISPs hate their customers that much?2 -
My father had a PC with Win3.11 where young me was allowed to play solitaire and an educational programs for kids, later on, followed Win98. I was fascinated with this big grey boxes which could do so many things, especially connect you to the Internet where you could find knowledge about EVERYTHING. (Someone remember the "Blinde Kuh" search engine?)
I remember my father connecting the modem with a long cable all the way through several rooms to the TAE-outlet and the weird sounds the device made.
I often heard "Get away from the PC or your eyes will become rectangular!" when I was sitting there for hours over hours reading and playing.
When I was ten, I got my first own computer, a trusty 486er (386 with logical coprocessor! 8MB RAM if I remember correctly. Weeee! :D) which was my uncle's old PC with Win95.
I started writing on the PC and got into several online communities ... it went downhill from there. :D11 -
Modem issues kept going on.
Started complaining to them again and requesting they send one of their proper modems.
Service: "Unfortunately it is not possible to request a different modem"
Me (tho *slightly* more polite): "I don't care, you guys caused this issue by sending us a shitty modem, so you guys are now to send me a proper modem, period. I'm done with having unstable internet because <ISP> doesn't want to admit their modems are flawed by design and deliver proper ones."
Service: "I have good news! We can swap out your modem for the one you requested"
Sometimes, you just have to bitch hard enough. -
Here's a nightmarish tale that happened to me not long ago:
One of our stores was moving, so they asked me for help with the systems. Thinking it'd be fun, I said yes, and went. All I had to do was unplug everything and reorder it at the new location, sounds really easy right?
They hadn't cleaned the computer area in ten years.
Each time something broke, they replaced it...and left the old cables there. But that was nothing compared to just a little later, when I tackled the network situation.
For two stations, they had:
2 routers. 5 switches. A wi-fi adapter, even though the routers had that capability, an adsl modem backup and a...56k modem. ALL plugged. ALL linked.
Turns out they switched providers, and they didn't bother removing the old equipment. They just linked everything together.
Man, what a night it was -_-1 -
So I have a job at a client to fix their system because the last systemadmin fucked everything up. One of the things I need to do is let the boss work from home.
No problem. I set up a vpn connection to work and everything just works. Except that the home network had the same dhcp range so that had to change.
I login on the router and literally everything is fucking locked. I call them and they send me a new router same fucking problem. So we bought an asus router so I finally can fix it.
QUESS WHAT THE FUCKING GARBAGE DOESNT EVEN HAVE BRIDGE MODE. FUCK KPN AND THEIR MODEMS.1 -
Lua users, have you used moonscript?
It's a little language that has it's own interpreter or can be compiled down to Lua and it's absolutely lovely (currently using it with Love2d).
Of course, as with most things, what I love about it also royally pisses me off sometimes.
For starters local has to be declared for variables, unlike lua.
Otherwise the variable goes to _
Also note, that some tutorials literally tell you the opposite.
all variables are local by default
unless you don't declare them
then they go to _ (throwaway)
Some tutorials get this wrong too.
all variables have to be declared local
except tables. failure to declare a table WITHOUT a local will cause things like
table.insert to fail with "nil" values for no god damn reason.
No tutorial I could find mentioned this.
Did you know we call methods with '\'?
By the way, we call methods with '\'.
Why? Who the fuck knows.
Does make writing web routes more natural though.
Variables in the parameters of new are declared and bound for you. Would have loved to know this before hand instead of trying
to bind to them like a fucking idiot.
Fat arrows are used to pass in self for methods.
Unless you're calling a method. Then you use backwards slash. This fact is unhelpful when you're a beginner and dealing with the differences between the *other* arrow, the backslash, the fat arrow, and the fact that functions can be called with or WITHOUT parenthesis.
And on that note..
While learning all this other shit, don't forget parenthesis are optional!
Except when they're not!
..Like when you have a function call among your arguments and have to disambiguate which args belong to the outer call and to the inner call! Why not just be fucking consistent?
But on the plus size, ":" is now used for what it should have been used for in the fucking beginning: binding values to keys.
And on the downside, it's in a language thats built on top of another language that uses it for fucking *method calls*, a completely
different fucking usage.
And better still, to add to that brainfuckery thats lost in the mental translational noise like static on a fucking dialup modem, you define methods with the fat arrow. Wait, was that the single arrow or fat one? Yeah the fat one. Fuck. But not before you do THIS shit..
someShit: =>
yeah, you STILL include the god damn colon just so when you're coming from lua you can do a mental double take. "Why am I passing self twice? Oh right, because fuck me, I decided to use moonscript." It's consistent on that front but it also pisses me off.
A lot of these are actually quality of life improvements disguised as gotchas, but when you're two beers in to a 30 minute headscratcher it sure doesn't fucking feel like it.
Nevertheless, once I moved beyond the gotchas, it was like night and day. Sure moonscripts takes a giant steaming dump all over the lua output, like a schizophrenic alcoholic athena from the head of zeus, but god damn, when it works it just WORKS.
Locals that act like locals? Check.
Sane OOP? Check.
Classes, constructors, easy access to class methods, iterators? Check, check, check, check, check.
I fucking hate ceremony. Configuration over convention is for cunts. And moonscript goes a long ways toward making lua less cunty.
If you've ever felt this way while using lua, please, give moonscript a try.
You'll regret it, but in a good way!6 -
"You're a tech person, can you fix my internet?"
(proceed to waste 2 hours facetiming as she points her phone camera around at a clusterfuck of cords going to/from her modem and phone setup) -
Fuck! WiFi issues are nerve-wracking!
We're nearly in 2022 and I have to still deal with outages. I want my dial-up modem back. 😐11 -
Another story just brought back a flood of memories of dialing into a BBS over a 9600 baud modem, and using Blue Wave to post messages on Fidonet. Back in the day when NCSA Mosaic was the standard for browsers, the 40MB HDD was king, and 1MB was a lot of memory. Wow. OMG, and before that, I had a Commodore 64 running GEOS. I'm really feeling old now.3
-
Why does D-Link make absolutely useless drivers? I've bought a USB modem in order to use cellular with my laptop, and the controlling software absolutely sucks. Often it doesn't recognize the device even though it's plugged in, other times it randomly decides that there's no service despite my phone right next to it getting 4 bars. This fucking piece of shit cost 30€, and it's shipped with a proprietary piece of software that's so bad it was probably written by an intern for half the price of a single device.4
-
So I just started watching Eli The Computer Guy's videos on networking and I really like them so far(only on the introduction so far though), but I was a bit confused about some of the stuff and I thought to myself that some of this might be obsolote or not so much in use these days/different. So here are some questions(now bear with me, I'm still a noob to the whole topic of networking):
-Are Eli's videos on networking obsolete(besides the speeds that he talks about), what you recommend some other tutorial, if so which one?
-Is a switch necessary for a small network?
-Do we still connect routers to modems or do we just use what we refer to as a router(a mix between a router and a modem -> gateway/gateway router)?
-Can you connect an ethernet cable to your router/gateway?
-So according to Eli if you have multiple routers they make seperate networks that cant just be acessed from each other, then how come it be that I can access my rasperry pi when I'm connected on the network of one router when the raspberry pi is connected to the network of another router and how come it be that once you have the wifi password you can connect to all of them?8 -
I told you guys that I would update you on my PiBM-5150 project. I figured out the hard way that my USB to DB-25 cable wouldn't cut it. Seems it is for printers and no matter how hard I tried it wouldn't work because of the path of the wires. After researching, it is apparent that the GPIO pins on the pi are configured for serial by default but it requires a little voltage change from TTY to RS-232. Rather than do like one of the videos I saw and solder junk to a bread board, I found a serial (rs-232) shield and 9pin output for the pi. Now, both computers are true rs-232 each. Instead of using a modem between them, I bought a null modem cable (crossover of Tx Rx signals) to interface the two machines directly. I'll update this evening to show it hopefully working.
-
Every other Windows 10 update cripples my USB Wi-Fi modem and I have to manually install the Vista drivers to get above 10mbps again. #softwaregore1
-
Backstory: my father used to work in software development and IT support in companies with medium to large sized networks. I decided to catch up with him a few weeks ago and he asked me thus almighty question
"So if I installed another router in our house, does that mean I can double the amount of traffic going from my computer to the fibre modem?"
All respect has been lost, I was ashamed.3 -
Hmm... My first experience with computers was in 1991 or so, when my then best friend had C64. And I was 7. My first PC arrived in 1993. Prince of Persia is the first game I remember from that time. I started programming in 1995 or '96, writing useless things in Pascal. Using PHP since 2000. Still that’s my main programming language. And sadly, my kids have different hobbies than me, so they aren’t even trying to program.
I remember the sound of modem connecting thru phone line to some BBS systems and later to the first public and free internet service in Poland. I remember simple, really „computer-like” voice of my dad’s speech synthesizer (he’s blind person). I remember, when our time to „play on PC” was limited to max 1hr a day... What will our kids remember? -
!dev
Last year, we got a new DOCSIS modem from our ISP (Puma6-chipset, nuff said, not allowed to replace it with a proper one).
With this replacement modem came a splitter (to split internet signals from TV signals), keep this in mind for later.
It worked alright for a while, but fast forward to last Januari, our internet started acting up because the modem kept randomly rebooting.
So we had 3 maintenance workers come by already.
The first one replaced the wallplug.
The second one replaced the wallplug, saying that the previous maintenance worker did a shit job.
The third one replaced the splitter.
Now, later that evening, we got an email... stating that the costs would be 50 euro...
Ehm... what?
So I went to contact their customer servers and they said "but the splitter is part of the indoor installation. So if this splitter causes a malfunction, the maintenance worker will charge you for the visit".
So these fucking assholes give me a defective splitter and charge us to have it replaced?
They can suck my big black.
Still going on with the dispute now because that is some top level bullshit.
"What if it wasn't the fault of the splitter? Am I gonna get my money back?"1 -
Fuck this god damn router. Up to now I was really happy with the router/modem my ISP gave me (UPC Connect Box) but today I set up pi-hole on my raspberry and found out that I can't change my fucking routers DNS settings....11
-
So I have a semi big project ongoing:
Because my modem+router combo sucks dick and gets buttfucked to much I want to make my own Router with PPPoE.
So I ordered an 8 euro used switch, 24ports for management, but our IP TV provider is sucking cock too! He uses multicasting to send the fucking IP TV signal. So the switch is not VLan ready and so the network will be flodded.
But that's not the worst...
I don't know how to route VOIP over QoS correctly... So I just hope that part work's!
I also ordered another network switch Wich is manageable + an God damn networking closet. 80 bucks gone again! Wish me luck this works better...
BUT THATS NOT THE WORST BECAUSE NOW COMES THE HEAVY PART!
I wanted to use my old AMD Athlon X2 64bit and 4 gigs of RAM PC to be my powerhouse of the router. I plugged it into the wall, booted, screen error... Thought it might be the integrated graphics card... Unplugged my old one, inserted it.... AND IT WOR... NOPE NOPE IT DIDN'T NOW MY DAMN MOTHERBOARD IS FUCKING FRIED TO DUST BECAUSE OF THE GOD DAMN ... I DONT EVEN KNOW! AAAAA
So I thought I could temporarily use my raspberry pi one model b, a good fellow with multiple years of usage! I plugged in the sd card into my girls laptop, wasn't at home, and her God damn internet downloaded that shitty raspbian (sorry raspi but your servers sometimes are very slow) and after the download I realized her GOD DAMN SD READER DIDNT FUCKING WORK!!!
SO I GUESS I WILL WAIT!1 -
DB team: We will have someone reach out to you and set up a call for your database support request.
Me: *this will suck...some dude with a super strong accent, audio that sounds like crap on a 56k modem, and horns beeping in the background*
DB team: The support engineer is actually from your same area.
Me: Nice! *maybe an American*
DB engineer: "uh yes ello dish is ramajadeshava and I will be supporting each and every request"
Me: *fuck...but at least there's no horns in the background*1 -
Just moved flats with a last minute confirmation, sadly the flat in question is not eligible for fibre broadband (high-rise) so had to settle for good old ASDL.
Find a good deal (as all providers are offering the same speeds/technology, all ASDL broadband is provided in the UK through BT landlines) to discover there is a mandatory 2 week waiting period to switch over ownership...
Fine, will wait 10 days for internet (torture except from dev rant on mobile internet, thanks for being text only), box arrives 3 days ago stating not to plug it in until activation date...
Fine I shall wait, today I get impatient and setup the router without connecting it to the landline so I can use the WiFi to connect to my Nas etc, login to WiFi navigate to Nas IP .... Automatic reroute to "login" page "We have detected your router is not connected to the landline, ensure your router is properly connected". Try logging into management site, works, change admin password etc. No setting to disable "self heal" functionality. No setting to setup static routes for my lab router, No setting to switch to modem only mode for when I inevitably buy a new wireless router for when this piece of crap can't handle the internal network traffic...
All this for a pitiful 10/? Mbps average, I want my fibre connection back :'(1 -
Well, wasn't my mom, but once, i was in the house of the nanny of a girl i used to date..
I've told her that Im a developer and The nanny already got it like : "ok you know about cumputer and stuff related"..
So..the internet connection was shitty as fuck
She asked me to repair the internet,
I told her I didn´t know anything about network, but.. she insisted.
I said that she better call their internet company and they would explain what is the situation there..
She told me that It was unnecesary, and insisted again..
(We wera talking in the bedroom)
So i left the bedroom, then I went to fucking internet modem, unplug the power cable, then plugin it again..
The internet was still shitty, BUT, she had a placebo effect about the speed.. she was so happy with me and she started saying that I was smart.. (I wanted to kill myself)
we stop dating ..1 -
At first, I didn't understand computers or internet or why is that dial up modem making noise. And then one day, I was playing with my dad's PC with games he bought and interactive CD quizzes for my studies. Something about teaching me about a Bill named Bill who sat on the steps to some court house singing how a bill becomes legal or something.
Then a few months after that I discovered internet and then a friend of mine introduced torrents, neopets and anime. Heck yeah!2 -
!rant
...
.UseKestrel(options =>
{
options.Listen(new IPAddress(new byte[]{ 192, 168, 178, 20 }), 5000);
})
...
Look at this easy piece of code(that I added) from an Asp.NET Core 2 template project(MVC). I needed only to add this piece of code to WebHost.CreateDefaultBuilder() (in the Program.cs) to be able to setup a working WebServer which will listen and answer on that IP(local network machine IP) and port, then I opened that port from my modem on this local IP, then used DynDNS with noip.com, tested out on my smartphone with 4G connection and it does work!
This is the EASIEST web project setup and test that I've ever tried and that let me showcase something from my machine to the entire world! :')
Great job Microsoft; can't wait to try the cross-platform of this open standard. -
I know very little about networking.
So I've got this modem and I am trying to configure it, I am supposed to access to it through a web browser using its IP address. I pinged the broadcast to find the IP, but when I am trying to connect I have a nice "connection refused". So any ideas ?6 -
I am so frustrated
The week was tough
My modem just broke
I push my last changes on an other computer, in an other city
Windshit takes forever to update, so I can't play
Can't focus to read a book -
TL;DR: Computers and I go way back, but I don't know how I ended up as a dev - and am still not certain that's what I want to do for the rest of my life.
Rewind to the early 80's. My friends at the time got the Comodore 64 one after the other. I never got one. Heck, we didn't even have a color TV back then. Only a 12/14" small B&W TV. It's easy to conclude that I spent a lot of time at my friends'.
Back then it mostly was about the games. And, living in the rural countryside, the only way to aquire games was to pirate them. Pirating was big. Cassette tape swapping and floppy disk swapping was a big deal, and gamers contacted eachother via classifieds sections in newspapers and magazines. It was crazy.
Anyways. The thing about pirated games back then is that they often got a cracktro, trainer, intro or whatever you want to call them - made by the people who pirated the game. And I found them awesome. Sinus scrollers, 3D text, cool SID-tunes and whatnot. I was hooked.
My best friend and I eventually got tired of just gaming. We found Shoot'Em-Up Construction Kit, which was an easy point-and-click way to create our first little game. We looked into BASIC a bit. And we found a book at the library about C64 programming. It contained source code to create your own assembler, so we started on that. I never completed it, but my friend did.
Fast forward through some epic failure using an Amstrad CPC, an old 486 and hello mid 90's. My first Pentium, my first modem and hello Internet! I instantly fell in love with the Internet and the web. I was still in school, and had planned to enter the creative advertising business. Little did I know about the impact the web would have on the world.
I coded web pages for fun for some years. My first job was as a multimedia designer, and I eventually had to learn Lingo (Macromedia Director, anyone?) And Actionscript.
Now I haven't touched Flash for about 7 years. My experience has evolved back to pure web development. I'm not sure if that's where I will be in the future. I've learned that I certainly don't know how to do everything I want to do - but I have aquired the mindset to identify the tasks and find solutions to the problem.
I never had any affiliation with the pirate scene or the demo scene. But I still get a little tingling whenever I see one of those sinus scrollers. -
Java Life Rap Video
https://m.youtube.com/watch/...
SPOKEN:
In the cubicles representin’ for my JAVA homies…
In by nine, out when the deadlines are met, check it.
CHORUS:
We code hard in these cubicles
My style’s nerd-chic, I’m a programmin’ freak
We code hard in these cubicles
Only two hours to your deadline? Don’t sweat my technique.
Sippin’ morning coffee with that JAVA swirl.
Born to code; my first words were “Hello World”
Since 95, been JAVA codin’ stayin’ proud
Started on floppy disks, now we take it to the cloud.
On my desktop, JAVA’s what’s bobbin’ and weavin’
We got another winning app before I get to OddEven.
Blazin’ code like a forest fire, climbin’ a tree
Setting standards like I Triple E….
Boot it on up, I use the force like Luke,
Got so much love for my homeboy Duke.
GNU Public Licensed, it’s open source,
Stop by my desk when you need a crash course
Written once and my script runs anywhere,
Straight thuggin’, mean muggin’ in my Aeron chair.
All the best lines of code, you know I wrote ‘em
I’ll run you out of town on your dial-up modem.
CHORUS:
‘Cause…
We code hard in these cubicles
Me and my crew code hyphy hardcore
We code hard in these cubicles
It’s been more than 10 years since I’ve seen the 404.
Inheriting a project can make me go beeee-serk
Ain’t got four hours to transfer their Framework.
The cleaners killed the lights, Man, that ain’t nice,
Gonna knock this program out, just like Kimbo Slice
I program all night, just like a champ,
Look alive under this IKEA lamp.
I code HARDER in the midnight hour,
E7 on the vending machine fuels my power.
Ps3 to Smartphones, our code use never ends,
JAVA’s there when I beat you in “Words with Friends”.
My developing skills are so fresh please discuss,
You better step your game up on that C++.
We know better than to use Dot N-E-T,
Even Dan Brown can’t code as hard as me.
You know JAVA’s gettin’ bigger, that’s a promise not a threat,
Let me code it on your brain
WHISPERED:
so you’ll never forget.
CHORUS:
We code hard in these cubicles,
it’s the core component…of what we implement.
We code hard in these cubicles,
Straight to your JAVA Runtime Environment.
We code hard in these cubicles,
Keep the syntax light and the algorithm tight.
We code hard in these cubicles,
Gotta use JAVA if it’s gonna run right.
We code hard in these cubicles
JAVA keeps adapting, you know it’s built to last.
We code hard in these cubicles,
Robust and secure, so our swag’s on blast
CODE HARD1 -
So I follow Linus Tech Tips and set my computer's DNS server to 1.1.1.1 but the dumbass in me didn't set any backup servers.
Come Friday night, internet is not working on my computer. After a modem/router restart and it still not working, I thought it was just the internet in the house was down for a little bit (it was connecting to the router perfectly fine). The next morning I wake up and my phone's connected to WiFi and it's working, so I'm like, "great, internet's back"
Not for my laptop lol. Nothing's loading there. Since it's just this device that's having trouble, I decide to forget the network and log back in. Still not working.
I finally remembered my DNS server setting and add Google's external DNS servers to the list and now it's working.9 -
Modem dail out. Multiple failure attempts. The sound of it beep---beep---beep still rings in my ears.
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So Comcast is down at my place 6 days now. No tv no reliable internet and no phone. A couple days ago the "technician" came in and could not figure it out. For two days before his arrival Comcast was calling me day and night requesting I reset the modem - they are completely opposed to sending someone out. Anyhow, technician decides that we need an external technician. He calls in and gets us the earliest appointment of next Tuesday. So all in all we will be out of service for 12 days if the technician manages to fix it. And here we are in massive city in the USA in the 21st century without internet service. Google Fiber has announced their prices in my area - adios Comcast!6
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When I was 11, my uncle called me genius and I should study computers after I went online to HP's official website (using a 56k modem connection) to download the drivers for the printer we had at hone, since somebody lost the cd with the installation that came with the printer. Today, I am 25 yo software developer earning 25k+ a year :) #thanksuncle
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fucking mother fucker modem is nt working. fml. and fuck the service provider. its 2330 and I need to configure jenkins for my side project. hiw the fuck will I do this2
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Bought the HELIO Amped router and low n behold.. ipv4 and ipv6 not connected to the internet. I have a project due. I tried everything from uninstalling/installing drivers to using command flushdns. I’m starting to have my suspicions on the modem?
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Had a windows error pop up on my works storeroom computer (it's running XP) and it said it sent the error to Microsoft it would take approximately 1 minute using a 56K modem...
Very informative....2 -
wow Xfinity just wow.... how retarded can you be... I ordered the "self install kit" which the person on the phone said included a modem, a router, and the cables to hook everything up... the package came, and it's just the cables. no modem. no router. just wow.
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I was probably 5 or so.
This was during the time when i heard that dial up modem sound from my dad's "computer room" every night when i went to bed.
The computer had a huge CRT monitor which made that annoying high pitch noise but i loved playing with it so much i didn't mind.
My dad installed a Croatian knock off version of Super Mario from a floppy disk he got from a magazine (i still have it lol).
Every time you died you'd have to start the game again by typing "mario" in CMD. Me and my sister played it so much we became pros.
He also tried explaining how he codes in Turbo C but i guess i was too young to understand it. -
Calls phone company to ask what's wrong with the internet connection.
Customer Service: Please turn off your modem, wait 10 seconds then turn it on again.
Me: Do you honestly think I didn't do that a hundred times already? -
Hire are a few tips to up productivity on development which has worked for me:
1) Use a system of at least 16gb ram when writing codes that requires compilation to run.
2) Test your code at most 3 times within an hour. This will combat the bad habit of practically checking changes on every new block you write.
3) Use internet modem in place of mobile hotspot and keep mobile data switched off. This will combat interruptions from your IM contacts and temptations to check your WA status update when working.
4) Implementation before optimisation... This is really important. It's tempting to rewrite a whole block even when other task are pending. If it works just leave it as is and move on to the next bull to kill, you can come back later to optimise.
5) Understand that no language is the best. Sometimes folks claim that PHP is faster than python. Okay I say but let's place a bet and I'll write a python code 10 times faster than your PHP on holiday. Focus more on your skill-set than the language else you'd find yourself switching frameworks more than necessary.
6) Check for existing code before writing an implementation from scratch... I bet you 50 bucks to your 10 someone already wrote that.
7) If it fails the first and then the second time... Don't try the third, check on StackOverflow for similar challenge.
8) When working with testers always ask for reproducible steps... Don't just start fixing bugs because sometimes their explanation looks like a bug when other times it's not and you can end up fixing what's never there.
9) If you're a tester always ask for explanations from the dev before calling a bug... It will save both your time and everybody's.
10) Don't be adamant to switching IDE... VSCode is much productive than Notepad++. Just give it a try an see for yourself.
My 10 cents.1 -
Hey all, I'm curious for your opinion on this one. I've got some smart home devices (e.g. Hue lights, Nest Protect) and lately I started to think of the best way to protect them. Now I did see this project on Kickstarter (https://kickstarter.com/projects/...) and it seems to be a nice and easy way. But still, you don't know what they'll do with your data.
Would MAC address filtering in my router / modem not suffice for protection?
Let me know what you think :)5 -
Is it just me or has a company run out of ideas when their keynote is more about their partners and vendors than them self? ** Caugh Apple **
(I'm an Apple user myself) -
My first close encounter with a computer was with a came called "Skunny: Save our pizzas" in I think 1996 or 1997" and it used to run in dos.
And then next one that I remember was in 98/99 with my uncle ordering groceries on a PC. With a dial up modem.
I got my first machine in 2005 and the first game that I installed was Skunny: Save our pizzas. -
How in heart is possible to work with a router that randomly shutdowns itself around 3/4 times a day without any reason. Leaving me without internet for 10-15 minutes. I called my ISP and they said that they don't see any problem and they will not send any replacement. I can instead fix an appointment with their technician to have a look at the issue, but of couse, I'm paying for him.
How about no? I'm going to buy a proper modem/router next month, this shit router they give you have 1/100 of the proper configurations options you need.2 -
Just had a random nostalgia moment:
Childhood days playing wolfenstein 3d in the telephone cable modem internet times.
I clearly remember the first cheat code i used in my entire life for that game : ILM
What was your first cheat code and the first game that comes to your mind when talking about your childhood games :)2 -
Stupid Comcast.
My office network was down cause cause Comcast had a "non-existent" outage that affected my modem. Right when they picked up the phone, is when the thing finally got online.
Wasted an hour of my time cause I had to commute a half hour to go there.2 -
Why can't some people just go to a quiet environment or use the damn mute button when they are not speaking over Skype?
Honestly, i wonder what some people do while a Skype meeting. According to the sounds they make either chewing on their mic or siting next to a highway. One guy today was taking out his goddamn dishes out of the diswasher udring the meeting, without muting himself. Other people appearently have a mic from the mid 1990's and using 56k modem. MY EARS HURT1 -
>Be me
>Have the COMPAL modem with the DOCSIS OS
>Change my bedroom router's IP to static after doing factory reset on the modem
>As expected, I get booted from the modem settings page
>Cannot log in now, because "another user is already signed into the modem settings page"
Stupid piece of silicon waste, whyyyy. I hate that thing, ugh!