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Hey geeky girl,
Roses are #ff0000
Violets are #0000ff
I use hex codes, but I’d use RGB for you.
Yet to try it in real life.6 -
The problem with being a programmer...
I just broke up with a girl I've been seeing the past 2 months, that I was really into.
But in the end, it became a question of, either i'm with her, or I'm with my work.
I don't think that would happen with other professions, at least, not as easily.
I think, with other professions or projects, you tell someone "I need to work" and it's really fucking understood. "Ok, you need to work"
They understand it. If I was a lawyer.. I have a case. if I was a carpenter, I have a wall to build,
or a house. Etc. All understood things. Or physical things that can be seen.
But with programming, first of all, I work my own hours, I write software and then sell it. I do it all myself, I own my own business. I don't have normal hours like a job, but I do know my requirements, which is at LEAST 8 hours a day of solid, uninterrupted work.
If I had a "job" it would be like "gotta go to work" and that would be it.
But, because I work for myself, and because the things I build, aren't like something you physically see, nobody gets it.
My parents, as supportive as they are, will never understand how I just implemented a new design pattern and like, leveled up because of it.
They see software... buttons, and even then, when I try to explain what excites me, it's like trying to get a 3 year old interested in calculus.
How could they possibly understand the richness of what I do, how fulfilling it is
and how much I love it, when all they see
is me on a computer, clicking keys.
The same for this girl I dated.
The only place I feel where people understand,
is here.
Do you have any similar experiences to share?
Would love to hear it right now.39 -
How the fuck do people have an amazing GitHub profile full of contribution while still working and having a social Life??
Am I missing some secret or trick?
This struggle is real...15 -
This made my day.
This really makes me wanna go back on Twitter just to follow the guy who posted it.
3 -
Searched stackoverflow and found the exact issue I was having. The question is from 2014.
The accepted answer is a messy hack. Fuck.
The second answer is clean, clear, concise. It was posted 38 minutes ago.
Is this real life?11 -
The moment when you're failing the university, you desperately wish to drop out of it and your parents push you to inhuman amounts of things to get you to finish the bloody thing when not even a bachelor's degree will ever help you in anything and it seriously wasted 5 years of "studying" about things in food technology that were there in the USSR. I think you failed to notice that 26 years have gone after that. More years than my age is, basically, and the tech has moved forward so much I will never be able to utilise at least 80% of what I was "taught". Yeah, it's nice pretending you're somehow smarter than everyone else in your room when you have a degree like that, right?
I'm studying at a professional college right now and it's 11 AM to 5 PM five days of the week. How am I supposed to be able to combine a university that never helps one even fucking slightly if you have a job or something similar? And it also insists that it won't take away grades if you don't go there, but simultaneously it actually does that. I'm the type who cannot be made to do something in some cases even if there is no other way perceivable.
I just want to get a goddamn job that pays, but I need something that gives me salary of at least about 1000 USD equivalent to just be able to hopefully rent a small flat and have some money to spare.
Now I have to be going to the college. I might end up getting my PC taken away from me a THIRD time since me and my friends built it. And it's only been a bit more than a year since that :|
Did I tell you my age? 23.
And these people(my parents), think they can bitch, moan, take things away from me(the things that helped me all my life to not go insane from their actions), then scream at and even hit me if I don't act 100% the way they want me to.
AND THEY WILL SAY THEY WANT ME TO SUCCEED AND THAT THEY STAND FOR MY FREEDOM.
If there is some force that can help me out of this, I summon thee!
/endrant.
Sorry for that. I needed to have that out of my system.34 -
*eating at the local pizza restaurant*
me to waitress: hey do u guys support Bitcoin?
waitress: Yes we do!
me: great! I'd like to pay.
*waitress passes over the bill*
*i open my wallet and pull out a physical Bitcoin*
*waitress stares really confused at my Bitcoin with the scanner device in her hand*
18 -
age 11: worry about internet people finding me in real life
now: worry about people in real life finding me on the internet11 -
Me : You should try this app, its great!
Friend: What is about?
Me : A place where programmers and developers tell jokes and complain to each other
Friend : But you can do that i real life too
Me : But now you don't have to leave your computer to do that1 -
The programmer who killed people: Not so talented programmer named John, made a mistake in his code. because of this mistake the program users spent 15 minutes to do a workaround. this program had 10 million users. In general the users spent 150 million minutes because of john's mistake, which is 2.5 million hours. if a person sleeps about 8 hours a day, he have 16 active hours. which means john wasted 156,250 human days that equals to 427.8 human years. people leave approx. until the age of 64, that means John just killed 6.68 people because of his bug. So john, how do you sleep at night?10
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Wished sudo exists in real life also.
Me: Leave me alone.
Person: No.
Me: sudo Leave me alone.
Person: Sure.13 -
interviewer: Do you know HTML?
me: Yes sir!
interviewer: can you tell me its full form?
me: how to meet ladies.
interviewer: get the fuck out of here9 -
Ok guys. I'm not only rejected by girls in real life but also when it comes to playing chess online with a stranger :D :D
16 -
So the head developer at my company quit, and I was chosen to replace him. I haven’t even graduated college yet and am already leading development at a company with over a million active users. Is this real life?14
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Found out the most interesting window of the century!!!
Though the user forgot to keep it in full screen mode.
Outside world - Real Life 2.0 (reallife2.exe)
Source: Instagram
14 -
The most badass dev you've met in real life? For me, it was meeting Joel Spolsky, founder of Stack Overflow and Trello!
16 -
Truth be told. I'm funnier on the internet, but damn am I weird and socially awkward in real life.7
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recently started game development... used trigonometry and algebra for the first time in real life..3
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Technical Interviewer: "You killed it, and flew right through this. I'm seriously impressed."
Me: "Is this real life?"5 -
Misunderstanding is like running ftp server on port 80!
Ftp responses for http request!
In real life it happens like this
3 -
During the entire afternoon we had a ridiculously low amount of tickets.
Suddenly 'is this the real life, or is this just fantasy' popped up in my head.
😆14 -
Client: That loading screen is going by too fast. The customer can‘t read the slightly too long text. Add 2 more seconds to the load time.
Is this real life?30 -
There should be a name for rants about fake stories. Like the ones you read and can smell some bs going on. I suggest frants.4
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That moment when something bad happens and ctrl+Z pops in to your head. Then realise ur not using a computer.1
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Back in my teenage , a friend of mine asked me «Can you make me a software that guesses the result of a football match ?» I said «Sure, but you have to tell me how to calculate the chances of a team»
«Yeah, use the previous performances in the league»
«Ok, but you have to tell me how to calculate the expected result using previous performances» He laughed at me and said «If i knew how to calculate chances of winning/losing, i would not need a software!»
I tried to explain it simply «Computers can execute basic operations like sums or subtractions, and they know how to follow a list of basic instructions to give you a result»
He looked me like «If computers are so stupid like you are telling me now, are we all crazy idiots trying to learn how to use stupid machines??» and stated that i obviously misunderstood the real power of a computer. I walked back home thinking how funny was my friend believing in some kind of magic inside box called pc.
Few years later, i start studying IT at university. In the free time i look for small jobs like website development, small office network setup, pcs repair.
I continue noticing people believing that pcs knows what to do and how to do it.
«You sure I lost my data ? No i didn't do a backup. You sure my pc didn't do a backup ? No i hadn't a backup software»
«Why antivirus asks me what to do with the viruses it found. It should delete them obviously! Change my antivirus, it's too stupid for my pc»
«I want more people finding my business thanks to my website. How I imagine my website ? Yeah it has to be cool and full of cool stuff»
All that boring stories leads to my final question :
is our job dealing with persons who think we are some kind of wizard, well learned about dominating the pc magic ?
Please answer no.Please.15 -
The best job denial letter I've ever seen was sent to my husband and said:
- We already have too many people named Eugen in our company.2 -
So I just found this app, called LifeRPG. It lets you play your life as a game, compleating quests for exp and "gems"(which you can then trade for custom rewards.. I'm thinking.. Ice cream~ <3) I think this will help keep me motivated more to do actual things in my life. Maybe.. We'll have to see. I already set up a bunch of daily missions, and continous missions.
27 -
!rant
I got hired!!
It's been a long month of jobhunting, interviews, and paperwork, but I finally got a job. Real world dev life here I come.9 -
After working for about 3 years of my life I've established the following;
Work is mostly stupid people praising other stupid people about their stupid work, while clever people remain in the shadows. Will this be true for the rest of my career or am I just working at a company with a bad culture?5 -
Just discovered that we are loading 200k for a custom font on one of our platforms...
200k FOR A FUCKING FONT?!? FOR REAL??? ITS NOT EVEN FUCKING DIFFERENT ON SIGHT!
So I sarcastically asked why the fuck are we using it and my coworker said its because the designer designed (duh) the layout this way...
Look... Usually I'm a quiet person and I don't rant in real life but this time I could not restrain myself.15 -
All my 'real life' friends like:
- Why do you need two monitors?
- Why does your keyboard has keys that do nothing when pressed?
- You have a controller on pc?
- Hehehe. I found a funny meme on 9gag -.-10 -
Pay to win games are technically VR
You need to be successful in real life to be successful in the game5 -
DevRant is such a small world. I posted a story about someone I know in real life and she posted a rant about me too.
And it's good to be back here.8 -
Nature gave me a real life 🦆 debugging friend. He wasn't really helpful though. He flew away shortly after. Probably got a call from a more desperate dev.
4 -
Moved into my a new house. No internet yet, and my mobile data barely connects. Real life horror story.8
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Finally, my stressball. 💓
Thanks a bunch, @dfox and @trogus.
For making this bloody awesome app and the cool swag.
If I happen to meet you in real life, I'll take you both out for drinks. 🍻
4 -
[OC] Don't let the nature get to you only as a pixels on your screen!
Free your mind and don't forget the real world is out there, waiting for you to help you think, calm yourself and please you in the silence of a forest ~
No fans spinning
7 -
#include <rant>
So, in my class I have this one dude who also code, "Awesome" I thought when I first saw that he codes, he codes in c# and claims to know JavaScript.
So I hung out with him a bit on recess/break time, and I eventually found out that he is a d*ckhead
First of all, he claims that he can code ANYTHING, I mean triple A games, the machine that can find pi in 10 seconds. And I know that this isn't true, because he "can't bother" with showing me it.. whatever I think.
I also mentioned that he is a d*ck, why am i saying that? Because if you make an error he would just go, "there is supposed to be *insert random bullshit here* instead of *a typo that I made*, retard. You are honestly fucking stupid" Listen, I love when people point errors out, it really helps. But when you say it like that, it honestly makes me sad. One day, I was messing around with classes in python and he went "hey idiot! That's wrong! There is supposed to be a *random word* instead of *working code*". The funny thing is, HE DOESNT KNOW WHAT PYTHON IS. So I comment out the working code and puts in his c# bs there instead. And he just says, "it isn't working because there's a private class instead of a public class. Ehmm, excuse me? This is python, ok.
Oh and he told me I was a retard because I can't develop triple a games using pure JavaScript.
Any tips on dealing with the guy?23 -
Let’s be real here for a second.
All I really want in my life is this virtual doggo!
A real virtual good boy!
12 -
when you work for a place that has plain text passwords in the db. lol
I asked head of department if he knew what salting/hashing passwords was and he said no.... is this real life?19 -
When a programmer is in love,
He doesn't care about the UI, but cares about the algorithm and functionality.
In real life, he care about what is inside, not the physical appearance. :)5 -
I wrote code yesterday, that functions the way it is supposed to.
I do not understand my code today.7 -
You know you have been coding for a while when you see a sign on the street and think "hey, that could use a bit more margin 🤔"3
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Being told that real life experience < school degree.
You couldn't possibly be more fucking wrong.3 -
{spoilers, i guess...}
In season 1 episode 4 of Mr.Robot, Elliott plans on using a Raspberry Pi to heat up the storage facility in order to destroy the cassette tapes stored there. If he can get the temperature high enough, it would render those tapes useless. I was just wondering, can a hack like this take place in real life?11 -
I typed "goto the place..." somewhere and later realized that "go" and "to" are two different words in real life.
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Incase you wonder where I am gone to: Well. Looks like I'm a part time irganist now xD
Yes, this is me,
Yes, this is very fun,
Yes, I deliberately go to church X)
(I still code a lot)
13 -
My favorite part of devRant is that I always feel compelled to [read more]. This is real life. Sometimes a proper rant can't be summed up in a witty phrase or two.1
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The student life smell is strong with my Desktop too,
and no I don't have a problem I only drink and smoke socially also when a bug takes longer than an hour to fix...
Which is most of the time
Okay I might have a little problem
10 -
"yes, we are looking for frontend interns from your place of education!"
One week later:
"Sorry, but we would like someone with more real-life experience"
How do you expect me to get experience!?2 -
I always giggle when I search something like "how to kill zombies" in stackoverflow :v
hope not a repost, sorry for the light
2 -
That feeling of accomplishment you get when the person who go you into programming, had patience and tought you finally comes to you 8 years later and sees you as a collegue.
A real high point in my life -
I can't tell you how much I hate people who make articles doing relatively simple things, in node, and instead of showing how to do it, they proceed tell you to install a fucking package (usually made by them)
Yeah no thanks, it's great that you figured this out and took the time to "enlighten" other devs but I'll just look at your repo and use the native JavaScript functions you wrapped on myEgoInflatingPagacke.justAWrapperHuehue(). Bye.1 -
** Programmers Speak **
Don't know much about real life,
But Relationships in Laravel are important. -
A sign in front of startup office:
Do not feed the developers! We keep them on a soylent diet - eating real food might make them question their life choices. -
In 3 years of coding, I have yet to meet another person who codes... In real life. Where is everyone14
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I've been dragged out of the house by my parents cos it's bank holiday.... I'm now in a place called a Guar-denn center looking at green stuff??! Reminds me of grass from Skyrim but it's too detailed..... And it's sunny too....
And I'm 30... FML3 -
Well. I was fresh software engineer. Was so excited to start working on real life codes.
They put me in charge of writing user manual. In 2 different languages 🤐3 -
When some born-in-the-90s chode claims that linux is bullshit because you might sometimes have to use the keyboard on the command line, I set that motherfucker's house on fire.4
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What the fuck is this?
I'm so confused...
Where is the Netflix app? Is this real life?
Please help me.
17 -
Infinite loop in real life :/
X: Where is your house?
Y: Near Ramesh's house.
X: Where is Ramesh's house?
Y: Near my house.8 -
I just had the most surreal email discussion I think I've ever had...
I spent over two hours going back-and-forth over email with an enterprise DBA, trying to convince them I needed a primary key for a table. They created the table without a primary key (or any unique constraints... or indexes... but that's another discussion). I asked them to add one. Then had to justify why.
If you ever find yourself justifying why you need a primary key on a table in an RDBMS, that's the day you find yourself asking "is this real life?"
I want the last two hours of my life back. And a handful of Advil.1 -
Yesterday while we finished having breakfast, the receptionist from the office approached us and said: "Guys, the company mail does not work! We lost the domain! They forgot to pay the bill!" and we all see each other's faces confused.
I don't like to link the work email on my personal phone, so I open the company's page on the phone and for some reason a DNS error appears. oh boy!
We all go crazy ass to the computers to see the mail and we can use it normally, my computer opens the company page normal, we send emails between us and everything works well…
I ask the receptionist if the test emails arrive and she says "No, I cannot even open the mail". (hmmm) I go to see what happens and she says "Look!" I see a label on the login page: "your password was changed 16 hours ago" (facepalm) I ask her if she have changed the password and she say NO. So I ask the support guy if he can reset her password and that's it. Magic, magic!
In the end we remember that not all of us have the same "computer knowledge" and discovered that the company's website only works if you enter “www”, very good custom software company! Very good!3 -
YES FUCKING FINALLY. After 8 years of programming professionally, I got to use linear transformations and algebra while coding with javascript in real life.4
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Is it just me or Social media has made everyone philosophers automatically.
Like pretty dumb and hopeless folks you know in real life be posting some smart and motivational shit they copied off of some random site.
Dude get your dumbass off my screen mehn...coming around here giving advice on how to make my life better...have you seen your life lately?
It can't be just me...13 -
DevRant MeetUp in Nijmegen 4th Jan'20:
I'm goin' scouting this Sunday.
Got six locations to check for compability.
Lots of coffee, tea, beer, wine and such to evaluate. Btw : what's our price level? Medium?
Anyone in for culture, arts or even partying?! =)
Cheers!12 -
There are always three questions i get asked when i tell people I'm a programmer:
Can you take a look at my phone/laptop/pc etc...?
Can you hack?
Whats the green stuff from matrix?3 -
The trick to balancing social and dev life life is training a deep learning algorithm to the point it gains sentience and the ability to feel real human emotions and becomes your best bud until it ultimately decides it would rather catalog images of mustard bottles.
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I just got ran off the road, in real life. My heart won't stop beating. Not a joke, or a funny story, I can't seem to relax.3
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When you try your best but you don't succeed
When you get what you want but not what you need
When you feel so tired but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
...
I am currently facing a client from hell. I don't even wanna write down the shits she is giving us. This lyrics are just prefect for my scenario.6 -
- not seeing and hugging my colleagues (I miss hugs SO much, with everyone)
- everything being online, which makes it less serious and more like a game I can just turn off. It makes it very hard to keep myself motivated7 -
Ok it is official I need a life. I mean a real life with those things called "friends", "parties" etc. etc.
I realized this while looking at some code I, loudly, said "Wow today's is your birthday you're exactly two months old!".
I let you guess reaction of my colleagues.12 -
My colleague just made a very subtle rant in real life:
"I wish we could become more software developer and be less software producer"3 -
Guys!!!! (And Girls) There's a real life version of Pied Piper being developed by Dropbox engineers! www.openh264.org2
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seeing all these real life computer setups and desktops makes me drool. @dfox and @trogus , mind if i suggest creating a tab or place to share this exquisite computer porn ?7
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First message of today :
"Hi, I'm X from the Y office. Do you remember that was you to set up our internal network two months ago? Ok, yesterday we called the elettrician to fix two wall plugs. Now our network is completely broken. Come to fix because we think you did something wrong."
I forced myself into some other jobs i had to do for about 2 hours. After that i grab the smartphone to answer.
Oh look, there is another message.
"Hi, always X from the Y office. We just restored the static IPs you setup after we've changed them early this morning. Now everything works again."
Oh really ?1 -
!rant
That feeling you get when you write a fairly complex 800 line long class without testing anything and it compiles without errors on the first try.2 -
Shower thought:
The anti-procrastination-technique "If it only takes five minutes or less, do it right now" is basically "Shortest Job First" for Real Life3 -
1) Apply Vue.js to a real life project
2) Make a CMS for a private school (unluckily, they don't want a standard CMS)
3) Learning wisely of the mistakes I made this year with clients ("what if we added this?")1 -
!rant
how long do you guys code per day?
being a student i have now extreme difficulties in time management😐
need some advice...9 -
Rant.TYPE_REAL_LIFE
So I go for a run for the first time, well, ever. I put my keychain in my pocket and I'm off with my headphones on. Come back home I FUCKING LOST MY WHOLE KEYCHAIN. Key to my house, my apartment, the garage remote, .. fucking dogshit man. Tried to track it down by going down the same path twice but no luck so now my only hope is the police but what are the odds :/3 -
Soon every hacker can move to Toronto and play real-life Watch Dogs.
https://amp.theguardian.com/comment... -
"Payment with card is only available at 5 euro or more"
OH IS THAT SO? WEIRD, I PAID LIKE 50 FUCKEN CENTS ABOUT 3 MINUTES AGO WITH MY DAMN CARD. ASSFUCKERY OF YOUR PRETTY FUCKEN ASS IS AVAILABLE ANY TIME BTW YOU MORON!2 -
Program failed to load with an error message.
Tried resolving, failed.
Searched the internet, Stack overflow failed.
Tried 4-5 solutions, failed.
Disappointments!
Tired of my life, restarted the PC. Program opened perfectly and worked smoothly.
Programmer's mantra:
Everything is fine at the end because "restart" is the real magic! -
Debugging in real life
Our family is working on the house. We have an integrated floor heating system, which is connected individually for each room. (we have three rooms, only two are connected yet)
Today we changed the main water boiler. At first it seemed like it was working, but then we lost pressure. It dropped fairly fast so we checked every sink, every water outlet.
We just missed the unconnected floor heating pipe, that was connected to the main pipe...
Its a fucking mess down here, so dont complain about you bugs, I have experienced worse!!!3 -
working with UX/UI designers who don't understand the concept of style guides or reusable UI components is torturous, why don't they understand things work a bit different in real life than in Photoshop, Illustrator or Sketch
-
Money.
I wish I had a more philosophical answer like building cool shit, but this is real life, so I've made it as a dev when I make at least ₹20 lakh per year.10 -
It is said that you should use the language appropriate for the task. Does anyone have any real life examples where the wrong language was chosen and why?18
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That feeling when your first classifier on a real life problem exceeds the 97% majority class classifier accuracy.
I'm doing something right! -
Since I started working at my current job, I've been growing to admire agile development more and more (or the ideal at least) to the point where I manage my LIFE with an agile perspective now!
It honestly works so well! 😁3 -
If people would change their name in real life like here on devRant I would be maximally irritated!!1
-
Maybe I don't even want to understand what "programming" means. Although I keep visiting StackOverflow almost daily to find useful advice on topics that do matter to me, when I post a question myself, they mostly get deleted for being "offtopic", not real "programming" questions, prone to attract "opinionated answers" or too much concerned about usability in real life? 🤔8
-
I couldn't easily find it again and I didn't screenshot it yesterday. But this is not made up.
Yesterday I found a Sponsored post on Facebook about a class for one of WordPress premium theme with visual builder. Well it's more like a workshop rather than a class.
The description said if you want to have stable income, want to work from home, want to experience a *real developer life*, etc etc.
REAL DEVELOPER LIFE. No kidding.
I do WordPress websites. Yes I use premium themes. Yes I do visual builder. Fuck but I don't call that work real dev work and I'm not proud of those projects as real dev works.
In the end, the hungrier guy gets the bread. I guess. I haven't thought of providing such courses at all.
PS : the mentioned theme is Divi from Elegantthemes. -
Anyone else starting to perceive real life and communicating with people using logical gate thinking?
I think I need vacation because communicating with non tech/code savy people requires an effort..1 -
In january this year i convinced my whole team to switch from Skype to Stride. And now Stride announced that they are teaming up with Slack... I am going to look like complete idiot because we have to switch once again ... 😥7
-
Sometimes when i drop my fone, break something or say something stupid i yearn for a real life "Ctrl + Z", and just undo that shit right quick.5
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I know its too old and a repost
but I wasn't expecting to see it in real life
I thought if was a myth
hehehehehehe
-
There has literally only been one time I've used singly/doubly linked lists in my code. And when I did, it turned my program into a monstrosity.
10/10 would never do again!4 -
[internet, real life, !dev]
I'm sitting 11h on the bus again.
You guys/girls/etc opinion on long term relationships?3 -
Rough start for a week. The coffee machine nearest to my office went broken and now I have to do serious analyzing when picking up coffee. If I miss my calculations, I'll have to engage in a conversation and coffee + conversation is usually a waste of perfectly good coffee.
All this brain work is reduced from my mental capacity I should be using for actual development work.
Evolution - give me a coffee gland! NOW!2 -
I've been writing SQL queries for almost 19 years now. At this point I've done more right outer joins in job interviews than I've actually needed to do in real life. Why is this such a common interview question?7
-
I was cozy at home, coding and talking trash with my duck, then "real" life called and now I'm out in the cold. Nothing new here, just wanted to complain about something 😓
-
Basically I work my ass off until I have made some real progress. Knowing that I can make something useful in a tough situation gives confidence to enjoy life and try fun things during the good days.
-
Quite a few years ago (late 90s, early 00s maybe) I remember watching a TV show where they demonstrated what virtual reality might be like. It was all rough polygons, no lighting or texturing etc.
I'd heard about the Oculus Rift and considered trying it. I get motion sickness sometimes from certain 3D games (Deus Ex, Portal, sometimes even Minecraft) so was hesitant. Last week, decided to just get one and see how it went.
Didn't expect it to be as good as it is - compared to what was envisaged ~20 years ago. No motion sickness. Not only was the graphics detail amazing but the responsiveness is insane. In another 20 years time what will there be?
Anyway on dev topic: Now it makes me want to play with a 3D/VR engine. Considering Unreal Engine but not really sure where to start learning. Maybe a book? Though reviews tend to say they go out of date quick, I do prefer a physical book for learning tech stuff.1 -
Whenever you feel down, whenever the code does not compile, just think... Think about the fact that you are the first line of evolution into the future. You are creating life with instructions, just by sitting at home and letting your mind wonder into finding a solution.4
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I think I've officially changed everything over on my dev rant profile. I love all the options for the avatars. I wish changing myself in real life were this easy.
-
The real life of me as a trainee developer:
New system works locally but fails to work in production and dev.
Proceeds at futile attempts to debug for hours to find out that my connection strings in the transforms were nested inside logging. -
Teach data structures by showing how they're used in real life situations. Don't make us do some nonsense puzzle shit. For example, a friend of mine is learning stacks/queues right now and his assignment is to build a simple HTML parsing algorithm to determine whether an HTML file is valid. This shows the student a practical use of the data structure and reinforces that this shit actually does get used in real life.
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What Dev tools/practices would you love to see getting adapted into the normal world?
I would like to fork Spotify playlists!3 -
"I walked into this room full of law enforcement officers and said "' Do you guys recognize any of these names ?"' I read of a list of the names, one federal officers explained "' Those are the judges in the U.S. District Court in Seattle."' And I said "' Well, I have a passed file with 26 passwords cracked ."' Those federal officers about turned green."
Don Boelling, Boeing Aircraft1 -
Figuring out how to install Ruby on windows, is this real life? Or is this just fantasy, caught in a landslide? No escape from reality.3
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Every *brand new framework/language* online course starts with writing ToDo app. But in real life there is no really good ToDo app yet1
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Coding experience #1
Even if I can't get committed in real life I make sure to get my code committed daily. -
Just changed my avatars skin color a tone darker since it‘s summer 😬 keeping up with real life. And expression chosen really fits reality 😱👍🏼😂2
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Exclusive Locks in postgresql are the real life manifestation of Satan ! Especially when you can't determine what's the cause. I hate my life. I hate this friday. I hate my family. I hate everything.1
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Hey guys. I am pretty new here and also kind of young in real life (not finished with school yet).
I wanted to ask you guys, as what you are working and whether you like it or not, since I'll be graduating in a year and I'd really like some motivation on what to study/what profession to go after.32 -
First day in introduction to programming. We were the first course to learn Python instead of Java. The whole lecture consisted only of what Python is good for and how powerful it is.
He finished with the statement: “... and in the real life, no one writes applications in Python.“6 -
If each developer can be substituted with finite number of student developers and each student can be substituted with finite number of answers to StackOverflow questions, then who would ask and answer the latter? 🤔4
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Sometimes I feel like, if anybody would have told me, the real use of GitHub, bitbucket or any other version control systems. Then life would have been much easier.
I remember in my college days, I use to keep the code backup in several different places on my system as well as Google drive and Dropbox..
For working parallely with the team-mate in college means...sharing of changed code..every now and then..via mail😫
Git, bitbucket you're the real MVP. Period.2 -
I woke up pumped as hell this morning, it was gonna be the most productive day in history, I was gonna finish that fucking Rails app I've been dragging on for long enough, maybe even go out and get a girlfriend... Then I went to the kitchen and the fucking espresso it's over... Fuck this shit I'm going back to bed.4
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...Sometimes as I read rants or comments, I look at the author’s avatar and I try to imagine how the person look like in real life... By some people I would be quite curious how they look like in real... Haha 😄😄😄14
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Bruh....ig this is a bit too much but relatable to real life...
God is the best programmer....
lol
5 -
Just debugged and patched a broken loveseat. I looked at the components on the working part and compared it to the components on the broken part. Could not figure out what the actual problem was, so I hammered out a makeshift solution that has things temporarily working.
Sounds like my job. -
So, goes without saying, but it would be pretty cool to see someone from here in real life. Anyone in Atlanta Georgia at the moment? I am currently in here, business trip :)3
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I'm absolutely fuming why on earth would someone try to apply exactly all rules of a theoretical concept. I hate those so called "scrum masters". We can't apply all rules of agile we're not machines. There's real life and theory.1
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Got half my college calling me "Pennywise" cause I work at the "IT" department. Thanks Saturday Night Live!
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Thanking of doing a machine learning project, simple but real life. Suggest ideas! I have one in mind - tic tac toe.3
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Any tips for attending my first hackathon? Keep in my mind I am not too well versed in applications with JS/Python. Also I really don't have a lot of real life project experience. I am super excited though.2
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Fuck, now I'm actually somewhat mad how much time those figma plugins could've saved me lol.
Especially things like generating a quick color palette, that immediately pastes them next to the element are so damn useful.
Generating real-life data into text elements, avatars pulled right from an API, auto fetched graphs for example data, all the goodies that make life easier.5 -
Had a nightmare last night where I was called in to do a coding challenge against two other people...on a whiteboard only and no Google or StackOverflow. I couldn't even get one line of code written. The other two guys got a bunch. Too bad one of my real life projects has a lot in common with this nightmare.
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Job advertisement : C++, C#, mysql... / Interview : C#, mysql...
Real life : working one year (part time) on a prototype which had been used (I hope it still not the case) on prod. And by the way it was in VBA :D At the end the file did several Go, empty :D
First real job in a business, that's good memories :p -
I have dreams where I stare at code/tables/program output, half of the problems are real and half are made up, I wake up stressed out about not solving anything and trying to remember which is the real half I need to solve.
Why can't I dream about the video games I play? I need to get a life... -
A relative path in real life! This office storage cupboard is to be moved to another room. The instructional note for the moving man reads "To the room furthest away".
Real relative paths has a familiar weakness, do not leave it half way for someone else to pick up!
../../../ on you all!
6 -
friend: yo dude, wanna drink?
me: nah man, that stuff kills brain cells.
friend: you say its killing brain cells but i say its just real life dropout to prevent overfitting1 -
I know everyone acting cool on the Internet that they've made friends while coding is lying. This is real life not twilight!3
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According to project manager :
You will just write an 'if' and two 'for' condition in the code. That's it. 😉
According to developer :
Should I code that generically. 🙄
According to software architect :
Change those variable names. And also that code was written huge unexpectedly, you must move this another service.🤔
According to DB Admin :
Put on an index this table. 🤬😠 -
I move to the kitchen and work to avoid procrastination... I think it works because the battery life on my work laptop is so pants, the countdown is real!
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I was going to rant today about lack of self-awareness and emotional intelligence in some developers, this rant was based on the interviews I have seen flop over the years.
But then, as I am typing it, people in my office start having this exact conversation. We get together and discuss it and in the end we come to the same conclusion as my rant.
Now it feels like a waste to rant about something on the internet when I got to have a real in-person discussion about it.
It’s like devRant in real life!
——
The outcome of the offline chat...
- Have a cultural policy that is strictly NO ASSHOLES
- Watch for people who are nasty on the internet, especially LinkedIn
- Be careful with people who have a lot of questions for you but answer your questions with “we are in stealth mode” or something similar
- There is no point in wasting your time on these folks in an interview, just politely conclude it as fast as you can and move on -
Learning C++ in university for all three years. They have decided that teaching only one language is good and that once you know one language you can pick them all up.
Not sure how true this is... also sick of the lecturer saying "In the real world you would not do it this way but" I wish university's would just teach real life skills and not how to pass a test. What am I spending £9000 a year on....
Anyway rant over5 -
Do you think we should have a Linux black-ops team?
In case we need to execute a `kill -9` in real life.
Like the facebook. -
The moment you realize that you don't need more than 100 Points to create an Avatar that looks like you in real life
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..that moment when you stumble over a thrown UnrecoverableBlablaException, but one level up you discover, that it is pretty well recoverable.. a real life "how to make your code less maintainable, rule #489: lie in you type names"1
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Got my hands on a Lenovo Explorer for 150€ throughout Black Friday. It delivers next week, really excited for it!
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Does the company you work has a specific team for their Android app? If yes, then how big is it and what are their responsibilities ?6
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Balance work and life? Recently? I’ve cut my number of friends in half. There’s been enough betrayal and petty bullshit to write a melodramatic soap opera.
I did have some work life balance once upon a time, but it’s been all work lately. Gotta get back to having some me time. Not all dev work necessarily. I’ve accidentally jumped in the real estate game with 2 feet.1 -
wk50 will be fun! Developing 3 new projects. 2 real ones and 1 mockup to show a client how our product will improve his daily life. All based on newest web technologies.
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I am getting my first apartment next Saturday, and it's awesome. And I was thinking of buying a great desktop computer because my laptop is getting old and I want a real desk with a real modern computer, also as a symbol of my new life coming. It would have costs me around 1300€, but guess what, I just spent that yesterday to pay the real estate agency, the deposit, and the first rent for that apartment 😭 I guess I'll have to wait again for that new pc...9
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If interviewer asks me difference between abstract class and interface,what he is really expecting? Can anyone give real life example other than coding.6
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Random rant: the real ugly thing about dark themed apps is that you can't for the life of you find the taskbar so that you may drag the fucking thing around. (not a light theme guy btw)2
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For coding advice
Don't stop thinking
Keep asking how and why a thing works
Learn the logic
Pick any one language
Write some code, do mistake, fix, learn and repeat
Do keep a balance of coding and real life ,playing games are necessary
Do exercise as well....
Maybe some more things we can , but most important is
Do what you love not what others love.
It's your life live and code your way... -
Keeping up with #100DaysOfCode is a real challenge for college students. Every 15days you'll be giving some exam of a subject which you will probably never need in life.
#random #SundayThoughts7 -
Why don't we have a virtual world API? Something that would support concepts as well as physical objects? Something that we could definitely the world in so we could simulate reality?
And if we could connect it to REAL LIFE?2 -
!rant
Working on a (mostly) off-grid LAN.
Basically just a real-life meetup in or around Arnhem (eg. somewhere in a park) where we have some banter and some offline IT (or non-IT, whatever people attending want) fun.
Of course, taking the covid-19 shit in mind.
wrote an entire custom DNS server (using DoH only atm) for it, added a Matrix server (along with Element so people have a start) and a wiki for it :)
Still need to add a Gitea server (or similar, any suggestions?) to it tho.
Gonna see to have some trial-runs by myself (or maybe with 1 or 2 people) soon.
Soooo exited o see two months worth of planning and development start coming together :313 -
When you would want to be powerful mage studying arcane knowledge, but you can't even handle CSS properly...
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I was about to go to bed, decided to open instagram and this angel is in the top of my feed. Amen 😇
I want to watch a movie where the actresses are:
- Miranda Kerr, Daniela Botero, Angelina Danilova and lizzydm (instagram - what's her full name?)
7 -
Protip: Bugs exist everywhere, also in real life (no pun intended). Trying to think of possible real-life-bugfixes while commuting (train legroom too small, traffic jam on the same spot every day) makes makes the entry to your work projects easier. You simply haven't stopped thinking about bugfixes, only the project changed to "commuting".
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Using Google Allo since this morning. The reply prediction feature is making my conversations very polite... Ha... Ha... It has to learn that real life conversations are not so polite... At least not with my fellow devs... 😂
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Ok ok ok. I see y'all have nice plans for the new year. Some of you even made a list that will be barely completed or remain unchecked.
Let me tell you my real issues/plans for 2020.
- First things first, I have to update the documentation of the projects that I maintain. Especially the copyright information. (2019 -> 2020)
- I have to check if any of the old software that I use is broken because of the year/date bugs. (you know, that happens)
- And finally I should check my Windows PC. If it's still OK than it means that no malware/virus is activated with a year payload. (it happens too, watch @danooct1 on YT)
Hope it helps someone.1 -
I am so habitual to handling unexpected behaviours in Android to avoid crashes that even in real life most of my conversation with my brother is like what if it happens.. he'll be like we'll see when it does... I'll be like why not handling now... And the conversation goes on and on...
I guess my mind is trained now to handle null crashes, even in real life.1 -
I have never, never, never seen a good source code in real life. In books, everything is shiny and easy. In real life, all software sucks and is badly written.
In my experience, all teams I worked with needed to work in a messy, ugly, smelly code base where the client is utterly against "wasting time" with automated testing.
Just needed to let this out. Sorry.1 -
!rant
Is anyone familiar with Shadowrun? I'd like to ask if they "feel" like devRant it's the real-life equivalent to the Shadowland BBS.
I do, and it feels good.2 -
to prevent being stuck, I prepare a business logic of how I should implement.
incase I get stuck I usually try to bring it in real life while looking at the sky or breeze -
!Rant
Just finished listening to the podcast with DHH and can't helping feeling he is the real life equivalent of Russ Hannemann from Silicon Valley.
This guy fucks!1 -
few days back i created real life example of live lock in multi threading
... and the whole night i was dreaming like i would have created dead locks in my real life... and i couldn't find how to remove those dirty synchronized blocks -
You have a revolver that when you shoot somebody on your tv/pc they die in real life, but since its a revolver you only have 6 shots, who do you shoot.9
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I don't realy know who made the real life and with what engine but it have really good graphism. I think it's 200k textures.3
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Anybody else feels like they would need to escape " and ' characters in physical writings when they're enclosed by their own kind? Had to forcefully not escape in my last language essay
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